I jumped out of my dad's apple tree so as not to get yelled at. The jump landed me on a pile of old boards my dad salvaged from construction sites. I landed on a board that had a large nail, which pierced my right foot, sticking out at the front of the ankle. No doctor was available in rural Iowa, so my mom patched me up as best she could. Days later the doctor did show up and decided to give me a tetanus shot 'just to be safe'.
I had an acute allergic reaction to the shot. All my muscles constricted and soon I was all twisted in a knot. Then followed painful muscle cramps and finally unconsciousness. At some point, I stopped breathing and my heart stopped beating. The doctor who gave me the shot was right there, and he did whatever it took to bring me back.
My first memory is of falling through blackness. It didn't seem to bother me, but got a little boring. Then I noticed a small light way off in the distance. With nothing better to do, I sort of fell in that direction. When I got close enough I could see that it was a person. He was head to toe consumed in flame, as well as falling through blackness. I said, 'Hi, my name's Joe.' He said 'I am forever falling and forever burning.' He told me that some long time ago, he and I were one, and if he had anything to say about it, we would be one again someday.
He told me my name would be Vandimir, and I would be a Magician. 'Will I be famous?' I asked. 'You shall be well known, if not well loved.' To a five year old, all this sounded pretty far out, but what could I do? So I said 'Okay'. He said he didn't have to be always falling and burning through blackness. He instructed me to take the tip of my right index finger and touch a spot in space directly in front of my face. 'Touch it, and make a blue dot appear.' When the dot appeared, he said I should expand the dot until the blue covers all. 'Come into the blue,' he said, 'for I am of the blue.' In that world, he was a young man in a white robe who lived in a beautiful park. He told me how to call him up so we could be together anytime.
From then on, the dreams have never stopped. I went back to visit him many times and it was always wondrous. I had difficulty in school, as I could not at that age tell the difference between the dream world and the waking world. I was caught a few times talking to the invisible man. Several trips to different shrinks didn't help. The only help came from 'the other side'.
I didn't make many friends, got kicked out of several schools, went to college because my mom said I'd never amount to anything if I didn't. I studied dreams, and psychology, parapsychology, scrying, medium ship, possession. Eventually all this led me to join a magical fraternity. There I learned trance working, and finally got a handle on the dreams. Now I can control them a little, but I've never found the 'off' switch.
Date NDE Occurred: 'summer, about 1955'
At the time of your experience, was there an associated life-threatening event? Yes Allergic reaction Clinical death (cessation of breathing or heart function or brain function)
Allergic reaction to tetanus vaccine.
How do you consider the content of your experience? Wonderful
The experience included: Out of body experience
Did you feel separated from your body? Yes
I clearly left my body and existed outside it
How did your highest level of consciousness and alertness during the experience compare to your normal everyday consciousness and alertness? More consciousness and alertness than normal Mostly very alert whenever I'm in an other worldly place.
At what time during the experience were you at your highest level of consciousness and alertness? Mostly very alert whenever I'm in an other worldly place.
Were your thoughts speeded up? Faster than usual
Did time seem to speed up or slow down? Everything seemed to be happening at once; or time stopped or lost all meaning
It all seemed other-worldly, but it was just as real as here and now.
Were your senses more vivid than usual? Incredibly more vivid
Please compare your vision during the experience to your everyday vision that you had immediately prior to the time of the experience. The vision was equal to what has been called 'lucid dreaming'. Good colors, smells and sounds.
Please compare your hearing during the experience to your everyday hearing that you had immediately prior to the time of the experience. It seemed as if I could tune in my hearing and hear something far away if I wanted.
Did you seem to be aware of things going on elsewhere? Yes, and the facts have been checked out
Did you pass into or through a tunnel? No
Did you see any beings in your experience? I actually saw them
Did you encounter or become aware of any deceased (or alive) beings? Yes Never met him before. First he was all-over burning, but in the world of blue he was maybe in his late twenties rather thin, blond hair, I think.
The experience included: Void
The experience included: Darkness
Did you see, or feel surrounded by, a brilliant light? A light clearly of mystical or other-worldly origin
Did you see an unearthly light? No
Did you seem to enter some other, unearthly world? A clearly mystical or unearthly realm he seemed to live in a world of elemental water, even though he, himself is
clearly firey by nature. Once he showed me a fountain made up of three large
squarish stones stacked one atop the other. In the top one, there was a small indentation, and that held a small pool of water.
He told me to pick up the stone and drink the water. I struggled with the
heavy stone and took a sip. Instantly every cell in my body was wet. I set the
stone down, and water seeped out of the stone to replace what I had drunk.
"What kinda water is this?" I asked, "there is only water and not water,
Ye have drunk the water of eternal life"
What emotions did you feel during the experience? A lot of confusion, maybe a little anxiety, but mostly comfortable.
Did you have a feeling of peace or pleasantness? Relief or calmness
Did you have a feeling of joy? Happiness
Did you feel a sense of harmony or unity with the universe? I felt united or one with the world
Did you suddenly seem to understand everything? Everything about the universe
Did scenes from your past come back to you? My past flashed before me, out of my control
Did scenes from the future come to you? Scenes from the world's future Not in the original event, but occasionally in the time since then.
Did you come to a border or point of no return? I came to a barrier that I was not permitted to cross; or was sent back against my will
God, Spiritual and Religion:
What was your religion prior to your experience? Moderate Roman Catholic
Have your religious practices changed since your experience? Yes I do not believe in a personified God. I do not believe in absolute good or evil. I believe in some kind of life after death, but not heaven or hell.
I am no longer a Roman Catholic.
What is your religion now? Liberal gnostic / witch
Did you have a change in your values and beliefs because of your experience? Yes I do not believe in a personified God. I do not believe in absolute good or evil. I believe in some kind of life after death, but not heaven or hell.
I am no longer a Roman Catholic.
The experience included: Presence of unearthly beings
Did you seem to encounter a mystical being or presence, or hear an unidentifiable voice? I encountered a definite being, or a voice clearly of mystical or unearthly origin
Did you see deceased or religious spirits? I actually saw them
Concerning our Earthly lives other than Religion:
During your experience, did you gain special knowledge or information about your purpose? No
Have your relationships changed specifically because of your experience? No I've never had many friends, and I suspect, my dreams and visions make me seem odd to many people.
After the NDE:
Was the experience difficult to express in words? No
Do you have any psychic, non-ordinary or other special gifts after your experience that you did not have before the experience? Yes Not so much a gift, but the dreams have never stopped; waking or sleeping, there is always a movie going on in my head.
Are there one or several parts of your experience that are especially meaningful or significant to you? It was all pretty wild stuff. Once he turned me into a worm and I slithered down the bank and plopped into the stream. When a large fish gulped me up he brought me back.
Have you ever shared this experience with others? Yes It was fairly obvious to my family and the kids I went to school with.
Everybody knew about it. They had lots of unkind names, and I became private and anti-social.
Did you have any knowledge of near death experience (NDE) prior to your experience? No
What did you believe about the reality of your experience shortly (days to weeks) after it happened? Experience was definitely real The dreams were happening all the time. I knew what I was seeing. It wasn't my fault that nobody else had dreams like mind.
I decided early on, that I had to get some measure of control over the situation or I could never function in society.
A housekeeper down the street was from Peru, and she said that when a child had a near death experience in Peru, that child was marked as a Shaman.
What do you believe about the reality of your experience now? Experience was definitely real The dreams and visions cannot all be trusted. Some dreams are just dreams.
Many dreams are just our unconscious mind reacting to what happened in our daily life. Different kinds of dream have a different 'feel' to them. As I have learned a measure of control, I can enter the dream, or just watch it. Also I can change the action in the dream to cause different results.
At any time in your life, has anything ever reproduced any part of the experience? Yes The dreams and visions are constant. I have learned how to filter out ones that don't demand my attention. Pot used to help me sleep. Otherwise, I don't sleep well, staying up watching the movies in my head all night. I wake up just as tired as when I went to bed. Anything can bring it on - lack of sleep, crowds. If I don't spend enough time on the other side, it comes calling and that's often not a good thing.
Is there anything else that you would like to add about your experience? The near death experience opened a door between the worlds, and that door has never gone completely closed since.
Are there any other questions that we could ask to help you communicate your experience? You did well.