Experience Description

I'm not sure if this is a near death experience or not. However, it is very strange and I'll just let you be the judge. In 1995, I was in labor with my son. I was in my hospital room. My husband and a nurse were with me. I suddenly became very ill. I was hot and cold, and clammy all at the same time. I felt a lot of pain, though it wasn't contractions. I hurt everywhere. I became very nauseous. I felt so strange. I actually thought I was dying. I told my nurse that something was wrong. I remember her practically on top of me telling me to look at her and to breathe. I tried, but I felt so sick. I said, ‘I can't’, and then there was total darkness.

Suddenly I was enveloped in a bright, white light. I felt ‘perfectness’. It was the perfect temperature. The light was bright but it was not hot on my skin like sunlight, nor did it hurt my eyes. I was very aware of the transition from pain to feeling wonderful. I felt peace, great love, joy. It seemed all my questions were answered. It's hard to describe the feeling of total utopia. I then realized that the light seemed to be shining through walls of brick glass windows. I heard laughter and looked down to see a little child smiling up at me. The little girl seemed to be about four years old. She had dark hair in a pageboy style and the most beautiful eyes I have ever seen. She didn't speak, but she seemed to convey the message that all was well and that she loved me.

I was suddenly back in my hospital bed. I heard my husband asking the nurse what had happened and she said that my blood pressure had completely bottomed out. I had my son later that day and everything was fine. I began trying to find out what I had experienced. I read a book about NDE that mentioned that experiencers have sometimes seen their future children during an NDE. I found the book they referred to. There were some stories somewhat similar to mine. I have had two more sons since my experience. I have longed for the child I saw. I feel that she was meant to come to me. However, as I have a total of six sons and three daughters, my husband is unwilling. It's been seven years since I had the experience and I'm still seeking answers.

Background Information:

Gender: Female

Date NDE Occurred: 9/5/1995

NDE Elements:

At the time of your experience, was there an associated life-threatening event? Uncertain Childbirth Illness, trauma or other condition not considered life threatening My blood pressure was gone momentarily.

How do you consider the content of your experience? Positive

Did you feel separated from your body? No

At what time during the experience were you at your highest level of consciousness and alertness? My body was unconscious. But I was very conscious and alert during this experience.

Did time seem to speed up or slow down? Everything seemed to be happening at once; or time stopped or lost all meaning It seemed like I was in this place a while, but I couldn't have been. I could have stayed there forever.

Did your hearing differ in any way from normal? Just a child's laughter.

Did you pass into or through a tunnel? No

Did you encounter or become aware of any deceased (or alive) beings? Yes A little girl. It seemed brick glass walls (through which light was streaming) surrounded us. I don't think I knew her. She seemed to convey that all was well, and, perhaps, that we would meet again.

The experience included: Darkness

The experience included: Light

Did you see an unearthly light? Yes It was a brilliant, bright, white light. It was encompassing and caressing. It was not hot on my skin as sunlight is, nor did it hurt my eyes. It was the perfect temperature.

Did you seem to enter some other, unearthly world? A clearly mystical or unearthly realm I was definitely somewhere other than my hospital room. I remember the light and the brick glass windows.

The experience included: Strong emotional tone

What emotions did you feel during the experience? Peace, emotional wellbeing, the greatest love, utopia, wonderment, joy. I cannot find the words to adequately describe it. No matter how hard I try, I'm never satisfied with my description.

The experience included: Special Knowledge

Did you suddenly seem to understand everything? No

Did scenes from the future come to you? Scenes from the world's future I think the little girl might possibly be a soul I've yet to meet on earth. I need some assistance figuring this one out. I feel strongly this is a child I'm meant to have, but considering my husband's reluctance, it may not come about.

The experience included: Boundary

Did you reach a boundary or limiting physical structure? Uncertain I think the brick glass windows may have been a boundary.

Did you come to a border or point of no return? I came to a barrier that I was not permitted to cross; or was sent back against my will I'm sure I didn't want to leave that place, but I accepted it.

God, Spiritual and Religion:

What was your religion prior to your experience? Conservative/fundamentalist

What is your religion now? Conservative/fundamentalist

Did you have a change in your values and beliefs because of your experience? Yes I had always been a little afraid of dying and felt that the separation from my children would be unbearable. I know now that there is nothing to dread.

The experience included: Presence of unearthly beings

After the NDE:

Was the experience difficult to express in words? Yes The feeling of ‘perfectness’ was so wonderful that I don't think it can be described with mere words.

Do you have any psychic, non-ordinary or other special gifts after your experience that you did not have before the experience? No

Are there one or several parts of your experience that are especially meaningful or significant to you? The best part was knowing, the worst part was not being taken seriously.

Have you ever shared this experience with others? Yes I don't think the few I have told understood.

At any time in your life, has anything ever reproduced any part of the experience? No

Is there anything else that you would like to add about your experience? It was by far the most wondrous happening of my life. When I get discouraged, I remind myself of what I have to look forward to.