I felt my breathing slowing, and then stopping. Then I was engulfed in light and there was a place - a completely black place I couldn't see through or break through. The light was warm and inviting and I felt like I was a kid in my grandmother's arms - the only safe place in the world. I felt myself losing everything then I heard a woman's voice scream 'NO it is not yet his time!' I awoke and was in an emergency room with the taste of charcoal in my mouth and mad as hell.
Date NDE Occurred: January 6 1987
At the time of your experience, was there an associated life-threatening event? Yes Suicide attempt 'Life threatening event, but not clinical death'
I was trying to overdose.
How do you consider the content of your experience? Wonderful
The experience included: Out of body experience
Did you feel separated from your body? Yes
I clearly left my body and existed outside it
How did your highest level of consciousness and alertness during the experience compare to your normal everyday consciousness and alertness? More consciousness and alertness than normal Just before I 'came back'.
At what time during the experience were you at your highest level of consciousness and alertness? Just before I 'came back'.
Were your thoughts speeded up? Incredibly fast
Did time seem to speed up or slow down? Everything seemed to be happening at once; or time stopped or lost all meaning
There is no such thing as time.
Were your senses more vivid than usual? Incredibly more vivid
Did you seem to be aware of things going on elsewhere? Yes, and the facts have been checked out
Did you pass into or through a tunnel? Yes Just a large tunnel of warmth with one black door that I could not pass through or see through.
Did you see any beings in your experience? I actually saw them
Did you encounter or become aware of any deceased (or alive) beings? No
The experience included: Void
The experience included: Light
Did you see, or feel surrounded by, a brilliant light? A light clearly of mystical or other-worldly origin
Did you see an unearthly light? Yes Can't.
Did you seem to enter some other, unearthly world? No
The experience included: Strong emotional tone
What emotions did you feel during the experience? Happiness that I was finally going home.
Did you have a feeling of peace or pleasantness? Incredible peace or pleasantness
Did you have a feeling of joy? incredible joy
Did you feel a sense of harmony or unity with the universe? I felt united or one with the world
Did you suddenly seem to understand everything? Everything about the universe
Did scenes from your past come back to you? My past flashed before me, out of my control
Did scenes from the future come to you? Scenes from the world's future
Did you come to a border or point of no return? I came to a barrier that I was not permitted to cross; or was sent back against my will
God, Spiritual and Religion:
What was your religion prior to your experience? Liberal
Have your religious practices changed since your experience? No
What is your religion now? Moderate
Did you have a change in your values and beliefs because of your experience? No
Did you seem to encounter a mystical being or presence, or hear an unidentifiable voice? I encountered a definite being, or a voice clearly of mystical or unearthly origin
Did you see deceased or religious spirits? I actually saw them
Concerning our Earthly lives other than Religion:
During your experience, did you gain special knowledge or information about your purpose? Yes Simply that everything was fine and would always be fine.
Have your relationships changed specifically because of your experience? Yes I can't sustain a relationship as I have become rather obsessed in discovering the why and where of my existence.
After the NDE:
Was the experience difficult to express in words? Yes The glory of it.
Do you have any psychic, non-ordinary or other special gifts after your experience that you did not have before the experience? No
Are there one or several parts of your experience that are especially meaningful or significant to you? No matter what I do on this level of existence, I am as insignificant as a dung beetle.
Have you ever shared this experience with others? Yes The psychiatrist thought I was nuts.
Did you have any knowledge of near death experience (NDE) prior to your experience? No
What did you believe about the reality of your experience shortly (days to weeks) after it happened? Experience was definitely real I wondered then, as now, why this life is necessary.
What do you believe about the reality of your experience now? Experience was definitely real I needed to know that something else is in charge of affairs.
At any time in your life, has anything ever reproduced any part of the experience? No
Is there anything else that you would like to add about your experience? I have in no way done justice to the extreme importance of this event. I could type away for days and not express the reality of said event.
Are there any other questions that we could ask to help you communicate your experience? Yes - if anyone has ever gotten past or seen the BLACKNESS please contact me.