I had a feeling as if I was drowning and could hear my husband crying and saying, 'Mary don't leave me.'
Then I woke up and I was in a tunnel of clouds going round and round and a brilliant bright light at the top. I felt a peace and joy I have never felt before. There were others there with me. I looked up and saw someone dressed all in white almost floating down. I saw his face and it was my brother, Billy, who had died in 1990. He smiled at me, reached down, and took my hands and I smiled back at him. He looked like he did when he was in his mid-twenties. We started going up towards the bright light, like we were just floating up. I saw my three granddaughter's heads, as if they just stuck their heads inside the tunnel and they were saying 'Nana, don't go,' their voices sounded distorted, as if they were far, far away, but I wanted to keep going and we did. Then, they popped in again and said 'Nana, don't go,' but we kept floating up and the third time they their heads popped in again and they said 'Nana don't go - we need you.' At that moment, my brother let go of my hands, looked at me, and said 'You have to go back, it's not your time.' He put his hands around my waist and guided me to where those three little heads were and they reached in there and pulled me out - I remember the feeling of being sucked out.
The next thing I knew, I could hear my husband crying and saying 'Mary don't leave me.' All the doctors and nurses pawing all over me and I knew I was back, but felt so foggy. I woke up in the intensive care unit and I was upset. I wanted Billy to come back and get me, I didn't belong here on earth anymore, and I wanted to go back. I didn't tell anyone where I had been, just kept waiting for Billy to come back.
On June 4th, I was moved to a private room and that night Billy was standing at the foot of my bed, much older looking and in a shirt I well remember. I was so excited to see him. I said aloud to him, 'Do you want me to stay here or go?' He patted my footboard. I looked up and he had gone. I felt like he just wanted to check on me. I got pneumonia from aspirating during my respiratory distress. The night before I left the hospital, the intensive care unit lung specialist came into my room to check on me and my husband and daughter-in-law were with me. He told me he wanted to let me know that after I get home I might start to remember having an experience of leaving for a while, as my oxygen level was so low, at 34 you are very close to death. I told him I did have an experience and he wanted me to tell him, my family was shocked I had not told them, guess I thought people would think I was crazy, but I knew better, you just can't make up something like what I experienced. He told me working in the intensive care unit he hears stories like that all the time and he had heard stories just like mine many times. I told him I was upset to be here, but understand I have a purpose and God was not ready for me yet.
I just had my two year mark, I call it my second birthday to myself and I know where I am going.
Date NDE Occurred: 6/3/2008
At the time of your experience, was there an associated life-threatening event? Yes Surgery-related Narcotic Overdose Leading To Respiratory Distress 'Life threatening event, but not clinical death'
I had surgery on 6/2/2008 and was kept in the hospital overnight for observation. The doctor told the nurse to hold all medications. The nurse told my family it was okay to give me medications. I went into respiratory arrest and the doctor said narcotics had caused my arrest. My husband said I was sleeping and at 4:00 am, then I started gurgling and having trouble breathing. He called the nurse and she called the intensive care unit team and about fifteen people were on top of me giving me chest compressions and I had a bag on my mouth pumping air in me.
How do you consider the content of your experience? Wonderful
The experience included: Out of body experience
Did you feel separated from your body? No
How did your highest level of consciousness and alertness during the experience compare to your normal everyday consciousness and alertness? Normal consciousness and alertness When I saw the bright light and my brother.
At what time during the experience were you at your highest level of consciousness and alertness? When I saw the bright light and my brother.
Were your thoughts speeded up? Incredibly fast
Did time seem to speed up or slow down? Everything seemed to be happening at once; or time stopped or lost all meaning
Were your senses more vivid than usual? Incredibly more vivid
Please compare your hearing during the experience to your everyday hearing that you had immediately prior to the time of the experience. My granddaughter's voices sounded distorted, I have compared them the little girl's voice in the movie Poltergeist, when she was behind the wall in the closet.
Did you seem to be aware of things going on elsewhere? Yes, and the facts have been checked out
Did you pass into or through a tunnel? Yes It was a beautiful tunnel made of clouds and I was just floating around and I was in it.
The experience included: Presence of deceased persons
Did you see any beings in your experience? I actually saw them
Did you encounter or become aware of any deceased (or alive) beings? Yes My brother came floating down the tunnel and I knew him. I said nothing, he told me it was not my time, and I had to go back.
The experience included: Light
Did you see, or feel surrounded by, a brilliant light? A light clearly of mystical or other-worldly origin
Did you see an unearthly light? Yes Very bright at the top of the tunnel.
Did you seem to enter some other, unearthly world? No
What emotions did you feel during the experience? Joy and peace and happiness.
Did you have a feeling of peace or pleasantness? Incredible peace or pleasantness
Did you have a feeling of joy? incredible joy
Did you feel a sense of harmony or unity with the universe? I felt united or one with the world
Did you suddenly seem to understand everything? Everything about the universe
Did scenes from your past come back to you? My past flashed before me, out of my control
Did scenes from the future come to you? Scenes from the world's future
Did you come to a border or point of no return? I came to a barrier that I was not permitted to cross; or was sent back against my will
God, Spiritual and Religion:
What was your religion prior to your experience? Moderate Christian/Baptist
Have your religious practices changed since your experience? No
What is your religion now? Moderate Christian/Baptist
Did you have a change in your values and beliefs because of your experience? No
Did you seem to encounter a mystical being or presence, or hear an unidentifiable voice? I encountered a definite being, or a voice clearly of mystical or unearthly origin
Did you see deceased or religious spirits? I actually saw them
Concerning our Earthly lives other than Religion:
During your experience, did you gain special knowledge or information about your purpose? No
Have your relationships changed specifically because of your experience? Yes I feel like a different person who loves to share my experience with anyone who will listen.
After the NDE:
Was the experience difficult to express in words? No
Do you have any psychic, non-ordinary or other special gifts after your experience that you did not have before the experience? No
Are there one or several parts of your experience that are especially meaningful or significant to you? My Grandma had always told me when you died you would be met by someone in your family, I didn't die, but I was very close and my brother met me and I held his hands after eighteen years. I know where I am going when I die and look forward to that day where I can once again have complete peace and joy. I feel the reason I was sent back was to be with and watch over my three granddaughters. I can share my testimony with other believers.
Have you ever shared this experience with others? Yes Three days. My husband and daughter in law were in awe. The intensive care unit doctor completely understood. My family was all influenced by my experience, as I could tell them I know where we are all going and they are all believers in God.
Did you have any knowledge of near death experience (NDE) prior to your experience? No
What did you believe about the reality of your experience shortly (days to weeks) after it happened? Experience was definitely real I knew it was real, no way could I make what happened up. I was very angry for a long time that I came back and felt I didn't belong here. Only after talking to others who had similar experiences did I come to terms I have a purpose on earth. Two weeks after it happened I was having an echo and the technician and I started talking and I shared with her and she shared her story with me how she floated over her body. She asked me if I was waiting for my brother to come back and get me and I said yes, she told me not to wait, he would not come to get me, and she had waited for twelve years after her experience that helped me a lot.
What do you believe about the reality of your experience now? Experience was definitely real I feel like I got just a little touch of what the afterlife is going to be like and it is just as clear in my mind today as it will be for the rest of my life on earth.
At any time in your life, has anything ever reproduced any part of the experience? No
Is there anything else that you would like to add about your experience? I watch the show 'I Was Dead' and it helps me so much to see others who have had near death experiences, I just get goose bumps and find myself identifying with so many thing they experienced. I love to hear what Dr Long has to say, but I get upset with Dr Nelson, who seems to not believe in NDEs and just shake my head and say how could someone ever make up something like that. I love that show.