After an abortion, I started to have a severe hemorrhage. In the beginning, I thought it was normal in such a situation and I just waited to see if it would stop by itself. After two days, as the bleeding didn't cease, I went to the hospital, by that time feeling very weak and with difficulty standing. After being examined, I became aware that my health condition required care and I was admitted to the hospital, where I stayed in a room with two beds.
I felt myself too weak, feeling pain and physical discomfort but aware of what was happening. I am not quite sure how long I remained in this state, if it was one or two nights. I didn't feel that I was recovering myself, quite the opposite, the discomfort and weakness continued, I had very light sleep and woke up many times.
On the third night (or second?) under a very distressed sleep I opened my eyes, already awaken. I was feeling really bad, in a lot of pain, and much discomfort due the tubes connected to my body. The room was dimly lit. From the bed, I could see the switch for the ceiling lamp and at the back, I could distinguish the room door.
My eyes were focused on the switch when I noticed people rushing into my bedroom. I saw a hand moving closer to the switch and at this moment, and before the light was on, I felt that I was 'ascending'. I felt great relief, I had no more pain or discomfort, and I had come out from a situation that in all aspects was terrible. I looked downwards full of curiosity, I tried to look at me but I couldn't see myself clearly, just a figure half hidden by the people around; my bed was away from the wall and there were many people moving on both sides of the bed.
An older African nurse, who worked during the night shift, was the only one that treated me with attention. When I saw her, I felt sorry and also indebted to her for seeing her great concern about me but I knew I didn't want in any way to return to that situation. Then I recognized two other nurses, they had always treated me in a sharp way and with dislike due to the fact I was in the hospital because of an abortion. I admit I felt even better when I saw them, for not being in 'that downwards confusion', and also for another type of feeling, not so kind, but which I felt like: 'It serves you right, now you worry about me.' There was still another person whom I didn't recognize.
After what it seemed to me to be a very short time, and without any manifestation of will, I came back to my body. There were still people around but they showed an expression of relief; they were arranging my clothes and positioning my bed near the wall. I felt again all discomfort and pain although, possibly, I was not so weak. The biggest difference I felt was that I had no more feelings of shame and impotence for being there. They turned off the lights and left the room.
I stayed one more night in the hospital; I remember that they told me I had given them a fright but I didn't want to know what had happened. As soon as I could, I left the hospital.
Date NDE Occurred: ~1988
At the time of your experience, was there an associated life-threatening event? Uncertain Internada de urgência com hemorragias muito fortes após um aborto Other Não sei qual a gravidade do meu estado.
I think so, but by that time I hadn't any perception about the severity of my health condition.
How do you consider the content of your experience? Mixed
The experience included: Out of body experience
Did you feel separated from your body? Yes
I clearly left my body and existed outside it
How did your highest level of consciousness and alertness during the experience compare to your normal everyday consciousness and alertness? Normal consciousness and alertness As above.
At what time during the experience were you at your highest level of consciousness and alertness? I had been conscious and alert all the time except for the moment I 'came down'.
Were your thoughts speeded up? Incredibly fast
Did time seem to speed up or slow down? Everything seemed to be happening at once; or time stopped or lost all meaning
I have no idea about the length of the experience.
Were your senses more vivid than usual? Incredibly more vivid
Please compare your hearing during the experience to your everyday hearing that you had immediately prior to the time of the experience. I don't remember what they were saying probably because I was not paying attention to that. My curiosity was firstly directed to my body and then, as I couldn't see it well, to the persons around it.
Did you seem to be aware of things going on elsewhere? Yes, and the facts have been checked out
Did you pass into or through a tunnel? No
Did you see any beings in your experience? I actually saw them
Did you encounter or become aware of any deceased (or alive) beings? No
Did you see, or feel surrounded by, a brilliant light? A light clearly of mystical or other-worldly origin
Did you see an unearthly light? No
Did you seem to enter some other, unearthly world? No
What emotions did you feel during the experience? Great relief, happiness, no pain, awe, curiosity, empathy and antipathy for the nurses.
Did you have a feeling of peace or pleasantness? Relief or calmness
Did you have a feeling of joy? Happiness
Did you feel a sense of harmony or unity with the universe? I felt united or one with the world
Did you suddenly seem to understand everything? Everything about the universe
Did scenes from your past come back to you? My past flashed before me, out of my control
Did scenes from the future come to you? Scenes from the world's future
Did you come to a border or point of no return? I came to a barrier that I was not permitted to cross; or was sent back against my will
God, Spiritual and Religion:
What was your religion prior to your experience? Liberal A religião não tem um papel importante na minha vida.
Have your religious practices changed since your experience? No
What is your religion now? Liberal A religião não tem um papel importante na minha vida.
Did you have a change in your values and beliefs because of your experience? No
Did you seem to encounter a mystical being or presence, or hear an unidentifiable voice? I encountered a definite being, or a voice clearly of mystical or unearthly origin
Did you see deceased or religious spirits? I actually saw them
Concerning our Earthly lives other than Religion:
During your experience, did you gain special knowledge or information about your purpose? No
Have your relationships changed specifically because of your experience? No
After the NDE:
Was the experience difficult to express in words? Yes I hadn't talked about it for many years as it is associated to a traumatic event.
Do you have any psychic, non-ordinary or other special gifts after your experience that you did not have before the experience? No
Are there one or several parts of your experience that are especially meaningful or significant to you? The sense of relief and absence of pain are unforgettable, the absence of guilt for the not so good feelings I often repress, the pleasant sensation of ascending. The feeling of gladness and peace of the whole experience and after it, a higher importance for being alive and a higher consideration for others suffering.
Have you ever shared this experience with others? Yes I hadn't talk about it to anyone as it is associated to a traumatic event. About three years ago, I told this experience to a male friend who was interested in these phenomena. He immediately associated it to religious aspects, I didn't proceed talking about the subject and I regret having told him.
Did you have any knowledge of near death experience (NDE) prior to your experience? No
What did you believe about the reality of your experience shortly (days to weeks) after it happened? Experience was definitely real I have never doubted about the reality of my experience probably due to the lucidity of my thoughts throughout the experience.
What do you believe about the reality of your experience now? Experience was definitely real Same as above.
At any time in your life, has anything ever reproduced any part of the experience? No