It suddenly became easier to breathe. I knew everything the doctor was about to do, before he did things. I began to ascend, face first, through a tunnel that was a warm, reddish color, like the color of tomato soup, but soft and similar to clouds. There was an unearthly golden white light at the end but not very near. I was concerned about my son at home and the son I was having. I knew I was dead but wasn't concerned about that so much. Instantly it was made known to me that they would be all right. It was very reassuring. The next thing I recall was being shown the universe. I remember thinking, 'So, THAT'S how it is!' I was in awe. It was like a huge net, or chain-link fence, everything in the universe is connected. (Whenever I see pictures of what DNA composition looks like magnified, I think of what the universe looks like.) Very colorful and beautiful. It was made known to me how important life is, all forms and that destruction of life tears a hole in the beautiful composition of the oneness of the universe and everything in it. (Murder is abhorrent to me to this day and I don't even kill a bee.) At the same time, I was being reassured in my mind that all was well with the earth and going according to how it should go. (I can't explain more on this point.) But I was struck by the simplicity of it all. While man runs around looking for complicated solutions, it is not complicated. Very simple.
Continuing to ascend towards the light the next thing was the beautiful stringed music. Nothing like it on earth. Also, I was aware of beautiful colors and that color has sound and coordinates with music. And the light became more brilliant surrounding me, and I was breathing it in, not with lungs but it seemed like osmosis, through every pore in my being. Each taking in of the light made me feel more and more exhilarated, full of healthy energy and brightness. Along with this, I had gained universal knowledge of all things. Drawing closer to the end of the tunnel, the light became stronger and more lovelier and I could see outlines of people, about four of them, who were telepathically sending me messages of unconditional love (greetings?) and I remember being able to reciprocate in same, sending it back to them from me, immediately, unconditionally. I had the sense that I knew one or two of them but didn't know who! I was ready to exit the tunnel, or I had just exited it and the light was so indescribably ethereal and wonderful I wanted to keep gravitating to it, to it's source. But I was held back by the entities very gently and told not to do that. I had the sense that it would be dangerous to go to the very source of the light, yet I was not afraid, but exhilarated. But I obeyed their caution. At that point, they told me that it wasn't my time yet and that I had to go back. I didn't want to, I begged to stay but they gently and lovingly refused me. I began to go back down the tunnel in reverse; I was still facing the light and the entities as I descended. On the way, much was being erased from my memory. Not the event itself, but the newfound universal knowledge, the details.
I felt sucked into my body and woke up and the air was heavy, movement more difficult, even moving an arm, not from any physical inability but this is the way earth is, very primordial compared to where I just was. I recall asking if I was in heaven. The doctor was frightened, upset, and said they nearly lost me. I still knew some things and when alone with my husband I told him to listen carefully and remember what I was telling him because it was being erased. And as quickly as I was telling him things, it was being erased just as quickly. When I finished I asked him if he got all I told him. He looked at me strangely. I asked again. Then he told me that I sounded like I was speaking a foreign language and he could not understand anything I said to him previously. He was alarmed. By then, all of the universal knowledge was gone. But not the experience.
The strange thing is, that no matter how many years go by, and I never forget it. Even writing this is like it just happened. Back then, it upset my husband so I didn't talk about it anymore. I didn't want people to think I was crazy. I couldn't understand why that happened to me, I had never heard of such a thing. But, occasionally, I will have a flashback. For instance, one time about fifteen years ago I was reading an article about the Gaia theory, that the earth is one large living organism and how scientists were arguing over it, pros and cons. Suddenly I knew that this theory is correct, with absolute certainty, like something I knew all along but forgot about it until reading the article. I said to myself, 'Of course it is! Earth is one giant, living organism, but I can't say how!'
Date NDE Occurred: Jan. 9, 1961
At the time of your experience, was there an associated life-threatening event? Yes Childbirth Clinical death (cessation of breathing or heart function or brain function) . Childbirth complications and I believe I was given an overdose of anesthetic.
How do you consider the content of your experience? Wonderful
The experience included: Out of body experience
Did you feel separated from your body? Yes I lost awareness of my body
How did your highest level of consciousness and alertness during the experience compare to your normal everyday consciousness and alertness? More consciousness and alertness than normal It seemed I noticed more details than I usually do in normal consciousness.
At what time during the experience were you at your highest level of consciousness and alertness? In the tunnel and just getting out of it and being sent back.
Were your thoughts speeded up? Incredibly fast
Did time seem to speed up or slow down? Everything seemed to be happening at once; or time stopped or lost all meaning There is no 'time' where I was, not as we on earth know it.
Were your senses more vivid than usual? Incredibly more vivid
Did your vision differ in any way from normal? The colors of things were heightened, much better than normal.
Did your hearing differ in any way from normal? Hearing extremely pronounced during experience. Nothing was loud.
Did you seem to be aware of things going on elsewhere? Yes, and the facts have been checked out
Did you pass into or through a tunnel? Yes It was quiet, reddish color, soft.
The experience included: Presence of deceased persons
Did you see any beings in your experience? I actually saw them
Did you encounter or become aware of any deceased (or alive) beings? Yes They were waiting for me at the end of the tunnel and I didn't see their entire bodies. I had a sense of familiarity with one or two of them but never got to see their faces or know their identity. They telepathically communicated an unconditional love for me, told me not to go to the source of the brilliant, loving light and told me it wasn't my time yet.
The experience included: Light
Did you see, or feel surrounded by, a brilliant light? A light clearly of mystical or other-worldly origin
Did you see an unearthly light? Yes An all pervading light that grew stronger as I ascended to the end. It was a loving brilliant light.
Did you seem to enter some other, unearthly world? A clearly mystical or unearthly realm Saw the universe, as it is put together, how it works. But cant now give details or a formula for it.
The experience included: Strong emotional tone
What emotions did you feel during the experience? Awe, love, happiness.
Did you have a feeling of peace or pleasantness? Incredible peace or pleasantness
Did you have a feeling of joy? incredible joy
Did you feel a sense of harmony or unity with the universe? I felt united or one with the world
The experience included: Special Knowledge
Did you suddenly seem to understand everything? Everything about the universe
Did scenes from your past come back to you? My past flashed before me, out of my control I had universal knowledge of the all, until shortly after I awoke from my experience.
Did scenes from the future come to you? Scenes from the world's future
The experience included: Boundary
Did you reach a boundary or limiting physical structure? Yes I was told not to go to the source of the light as it would be dangerous. I had a sense that my spirit would be extinguished. I did not cross it.
Did you come to a border or point of no return? I came to a barrier that I was not permitted to cross; or was sent back against my will
God, Spiritual and Religion:
What was your religion prior to your experience? Liberal
Have your religious practices changed since your experience? Yes Man is too hard on himself and others. Most ministers, parsons and priests are a bit off the mark in their view of God. Man has built up too many man-made assumptions about God and heaven.
What is your religion now? Moderate
Did you have a change in your values and beliefs because of your experience? Yes Man is too hard on himself and others. Most ministers, parsons and priests are a bit off the mark in their view of God. Man has built up too many man-made assumptions about God and heaven.
The experience included: Presence of unearthly beings
Did you seem to encounter a mystical being or presence, or hear an unidentifiable voice? I encountered a definite being, or a voice clearly of mystical or unearthly origin
Did you see deceased or religious spirits? I actually saw them
Concerning our Earthly lives other than Religion:
During your experience, did you gain special knowledge or information about your purpose? Yes Everything in the universe is connected. To murder someone is destructive to the order of the universe. People's religion doesn't matter. We are all loved.
Have your relationships changed specifically because of your experience? Uncertain My husband thought I became deranged somewhat and he just wanted it to go away. So I didn't speak of it after the first couple times.
After the NDE:
Was the experience difficult to express in words? Yes Earthly words, language, not adequate to describe experience without making it less than what it was.
Do you have any psychic, non-ordinary or other special gifts after your experience that you did not have before the experience? Yes Sense of hearing and light was sharpened somewhat. Occasionally have visuals of future things or a sense of danger for others. Cannot do it at will, it comes when it comes. I don't buy watches any more, they always stop running for some reason when I wear them, usually months later from wearing them. A strong sense of healing ability but I mainly try to ignore it.
Are there one or several parts of your experience that are especially meaningful or significant to you? The whole thing. It meant to me that I have to accomplish something on earth. I had a completely different, sharpened sense of God and us. God is more forgiving and loving than we are to one another.
Have you ever shared this experience with others? Yes First shared with my husband in 1961. He didn't like it, it upset him. Later I told my mother, she believed me and I told no one else for about thirty-five years, and only within the last ten years have I told others. Reactions brought interest lately, also have been able to comfort some people who have lost loved ones. It seems to make them feel much better to know their dead loved ones are very happy, in another place after death.
Did you have any knowledge of near death experience (NDE) prior to your experience? No
What did you believe about the reality of your experience shortly (days to weeks) after it happened? Experience was definitely real. It was different from my dreams. Sometimes when I dream I know it is a dream. The NDE is very real, more like you went on an amazing trip. You are more aware of things that happen in NDE.
What do you believe about the reality of your experience now? Experience was definitely real. It is as real to me today as it was in 1961. Nothing has changed to make me change my view of the NDE, not even time. I can't explain why.
At any time in your life, has anything ever reproduced any part of the experience? No
Is there anything else that you would like to add about your experience? Well, it was the most significant experience I ever had in my life so far. It changed my outlook on life and death significantly.