Experience Description

On the physical plane, I was walking along a rice paddy going from Nyoman’s family home compound to her husband’s home compound with all my family. I was following Nyoman, Chris was following me, then Terra, friend of Nyoman's named Hannah, and Amber was behind, taking photos. We were walking where the rice paddy terrace going from one level to the next terrace. My foot slipped, I fell backwards and hit my head on the concrete bridge that was going over the irrigation ditch. I then became unconscious and slipped into the water. The 4-foot waterfall was going over my head and pounding into my ear. My husband jumped in to rescue me but couldn’t pull me out of the force of the water. He called for help, a young man named Mickey ran up and jumped in and helped to pull my body out of the water; Chris held my head up above water. They put me out on the bridge, with Chris cradling my head in his lap.

I then started to wake up and sputtered water out of my mouth and nose and saw that everyone was crying. Terra was pretty hysterical. I said, ’Why is everyone crying?’ They said, ‘We thought you were dead!’ I said, ‘I am still alive. I am here. Stop crying.’ Then we walked, as I was supported by the girls, to Nyoman’s house where they laid out a carpet and I lay down on the rug. I said, ‘looks like I broke a fingernail’. This made most of them mad.

They called the clinic and were advised to bring me there. They got a car and took me to the clinic where a doctor looked me over, brushed me down with Betadine and said I needed to go to the hospital by ambulance. The ambulance took the family and me to Denpasar [The capitol of Bali]. It was a harrowing ride. The driver was amazing: he passed many cars, bicycles, motorcycles in the twilight with the red light flashing. He drove as fast as possible through narrow streets and roads, around people walking on the side of the road, but mostly it was the motorcycles passing us and other cars as we raced toward the hospital. At the International unit of Kasih Ibu General Hospital, they rushed me in by wheelchair and the doctor saw me immediately, I got an X ray, CT scan and lab work within an hour. The radiologist read the results within another hour: all was okay, except for the ruptured tympanic membrane, the bruising on my head, thigh, a semi-sprained wrist, and the laceration on my ear.

They put on steri-strip dressings. Against medical advice, I chose to go back to the hotel mostly so that the family could settle down and get some rest. Terra was very upset and still crying. I slept on the way back to the hotel; I had a throbbing head and ear (in the taxi). I was awakened by Chris every 2 hours to make sure that my pupils were normal. Then I just went through a slow recovery time, though the bruises healed very quickly.

On the spiritual plane, when I was unconscious, I felt a sense of being welcomed home: golden light, a sense of peace and quiet, and joy. I felt happiness at being so light and bodiless and merging with all other beings into interconnectedness and non- differentiation. I also felt dispassionate about things, it didn’t really matter what happened next after I woke. If they wanted me to walk along to the house, that was fine, but I didn’t really care. It was more of a feeling that we are already all One, so what happens is just more of a ‘drama’. It would be okay to just let it all stop/or not stop. I felt removed from what was happening, like being in a dream state and simply observing things around me.

I was aware that what is most important is that we see that we are all part of one Being. We are not separate, but make things seem separate in order to play out this reality. By finding our oneness, we can make true connections with each other. All the rest is head games and false reality.

I am meant to be here for some reason. I am here on this worldly plane to live longer for a period of time. Now I must take care of my body, mind and spirit and to share it with others in the way that I am meant to. However, I do not feel nearly as afraid of death. It seems like death will be an opportunity to be joined again with all Beings in a state of merging our individual selves. No need to fear that. It is wonderful! I will continue to develop my higher self and realize that is what is ‘real.’ I will connect and share with others. I will work to make this beautiful world a better, more compassionate place. I will let creativity flow through me. I will find the heartbeat of life and join with it as I can. I will see that we are indeed all One and celebrate this. I will let go and live more. So now to go on with my purpose of life: to share this as I can.

‘I have been in that heaven the most illumined. By light from Him, and seen things which to utter He who returns hath neither skill nor knowledge; For as it nears the object of its yearning Our intellect is overwhelmed so deeply It can never retrace the path that it followed. But whatsoever of the holy kingdom was in the power of memory to treasure will be my theme until the song is ended.’ –Dante, Inferno

Background Information:

Gender: Female

Date NDE Occurred: 'June 17, 2009'

NDE Elements:

At the time of your experience, was there an associated life-threatening event? Yes Accident. Direct head injury. Clinical death (cessation of breathing or heart function or brain function) I was not breathing for at least 3-5 minutes. They say my skin turned blue and black from lack of oxygen. Near drowning and head injury.

How do you consider the content of your experience? Entirely pleasant

Did you feel separated from your body? No I lost awareness of my body

How did your highest level of consciousness and alertness during the experience compare to your normal everyday consciousness and alertness? More consciousness and alertness than normal. Since I was unconscious, I don't know how many minutes passed, time was not important. I assume that I felt the highest level of spiritual consciousness immediately after losing physical consciousness. It felt so peaceful and serene in this place that I wanted to stay. My consciousness during the experience was one of total peace, happiness, feeling a sense of coming home, at last. I wanted to stay there where I was totally loved and accepted.

Were your thoughts speeded up? No

Did time seem to speed up or slow down? Everything seemed to be happening at once; or time stopped or lost all meaning No sense of time at all: only the present moments.

Were your senses more vivid than usual? Incredibly more vivid

Please compare your vision during the experience to your everyday vision that you had immediately prior to the time of the experience. I did not have any detailed vision: only of the golden light surrounding me.

Please compare your hearing during the experience to your everyday hearing that you had immediately prior to the time of the experience. I do not recall hearing anything during the experience.

Did you seem to be aware of things going on elsewhere? No

Did you pass into or through a tunnel? No

Did you see any beings in your experience? No

Did you encounter or become aware of any deceased (or alive) beings? No

The experience included: Unearthly light

Did you see, or feel surrounded by, a brilliant light? A light clearly of mystical or other-worldly origin

Did you see an unearthly light? Yes Brilliant, golden warm light that enveloped me.

Did you seem to enter some other, unearthly world? A clearly mystical or unearthly realm I entered into a golden void: not a world with any other description.

The experience included: Strong emotional tone

What emotions did you feel during the experience? I felt joy, peace, love, and total acceptance of who I am.

Did you have a feeling of peace or pleasantness? Incredible peace or pleasantness

Did you have a feeling of joy? incredible joy

Did you feel a sense of harmony or unity with the universe? I felt united or one with the world

The experience included: Special knowledge or purpose

Did you suddenly seem to understand everything? Everything about the universe I felt an emotional sense of well-being and acceptance, a knowledge that we are all connected and not separate at all. I did not receive any other special knowledge, but this was the most important of all, anyway.

Did scenes from your past come back to you? No

Did scenes from the future come to you? No

Did you come to a border or point of no return? I came to a barrier that I was not permitted to cross; or was sent back against my will I was being called back, I feel, by my family. I felt that it would be too painful to them if I left, so I reluctantly returned. Also, I was being sent back to complete my life and continue to do the work/life tasks for which I was born.

God, Spiritual and Religion:

What importance did you place on your religious/spiritual life prior to your experience? Greatly important to me

What was your religion prior to your experience? Buddhist I practice meditation, mindfulness and Buddhism and have for over 40 years, at the time of the NDE.

Have your religious practices changed since your experience? No

What importance do you place on your religious/spiritual life after your experience? Greatly important to me

What is your religion now? Buddhist

Did your experience include features consistent with your earthly beliefs? Content that was entirely consistent with the beliefs you had at the time of your experience

Did you have a change in your values and beliefs because of your experience? Yes The change I had was that I am not fearful of death and I also feel much gratitude for having a life to live up until death.

Did you seem to encounter a mystical being or presence, or hear an unidentifiable voice? No

Did you see deceased or religious spirits? No

Did you encounter or become aware of any beings who previously lived on earth who are described by name in religions (for example: Jesus, Muhammad, Buddha, etc.)? No

During your experience, did you gain information about premortal existence? No

During your experience, did you gain information about universal connection or oneness? Yes Yes, Absolutely, I feel that we have a universal connection and oneness with each other that we may not feel in this world, but that is the ultimate truth.

Did you believe in the existence of God prior to your experience? God probably exists

During your experience, did you gain information about the existence of God? Yes I had the awareness that a spiritual force exists that is all of us combined, not separate. If the word God is used, then God is all of us.

Do you believe in the existence of God after your experience? God probably exists

Concerning our Earthly lives other than Religion:

During your experience, did you gain special knowledge or information about your purpose? Uncertain The same as I have been saying about feeling the Oneness of all life and how special it is to have a life to live.

Did you believe that our earthly lives are meaningful and significant prior to your experience? Are meaningful and significant

During your experience, did you gain information about the meaning of life? Yes Yes, but that my purpose I was doing and needed to continue to do.

Did you believe in an afterlife prior to your experience? An afterlife probably exists

Do you believe in an afterlife after your experience? An afterlife definitely exists Yes I felt that some part of consciousness continues after death, or that I joined in with the ocean of other souls in the realm of the Ecstatic Oneness.

Did you fear death prior to your experience? I moderately feared death

Do you fear death after your experience? I do not fear death

Were you fearful living your life prior to your experience? Slightly fearful in living my earthly life

Were you fearful living your life after your experience? Not fearful in living my earthly life

Did you believe that our earthly lives are meaningful and significant prior to your experience? Are meaningful and significant

Did you believe that our earthly lives are meaningful and significant after your experience? Are meaningful and significant

Did you gain information about how to live our lives? Yes We need to feel our connections to each other and empathy and compassion here on Earth more and more. We are one being and need to feel our inner bond to each other more directly.

During your experience, did you gain information about life's difficulties, challenges and hardships? No

Were you compassionate prior to your experience? Moderately compassionate toward others

During your experience, did you gain information about love? Yes Yes, that love is total and all encompassing for all creatures and humans, regardless of who we are.

Were you compassionate after your experience? Greatly compassionate toward others

What life changes occurred in your life after your experience? Slight changes in my life Slight changes in my life.

Have your relationships changed specifically because of your experience? No No

After the NDE:

Was the experience difficult to express in words? Yes It is very hard to express the depth of feeling that I had in this experience. I have painted it a couple of times, since. With art, things can be expressed that can't really be shared in words.

How accurately do you remember the experience in comparison to other life events that occurred around the time of the experience? I remember the experience more accurately than other life events that occurred around the time of the experience

Do you have any psychic, non-ordinary or other special gifts after your experience that you did not have before the experience? Yes I can sometimes see a light around people: women who are pregnant have a certain glow and people who are dying have a certain blue light around them.

Have you ever shared this experience with others? Yes I have shared with friends and family. One of my daughters is still so traumatized by this experience (4 years ago) that she won't listen to the positive aspects of my NDE. But others are fascinated and seem to feel uplifted by it.

Did you have any knowledge of near death experience (NDE) prior to your experience? Yes I had had an experience of going through a tunnel of light once, when I was taking LSD. I had read about NDE before I had one. But my NDE was different from what I had read: because I did not see my body below me and I did not experience a tunnel, but did experience the golden light surrounding me.

What did you believe about the reality of your experience shortly (days to weeks) after it happened? Experience was definitely real I felt very fortunate to have had this experience; it was a blessing that I needed to share with others.

What do you believe about the reality of your experience now? Experience was definitely real I view the reality of this experience with gratitude and humility.

At any time in your life, has anything ever reproduced any part of the experience? No

Is there anything else that you would like to add about your experience? The peace and inter-connected-ness of all.