October 15th 2004 - I took some pills. I was found not breathing the next morning. I was rushed to the local hospital; my blood oxygen was forty-five or so and falling. I was intubated then air lifted to San Antonio.
I was in a deep coma. On October 27, I was placed on a 'Do Not Resuscitate' (DNR) notice. Up to this point, I had overcome sepsis, double pneumonia, adult respiratory disease, non-clotting of blood, and a complete liver, bowel shut down. They told my parents that they wanted to turn off life support because I would never come out of this. And if I did, I would be a vegetable. My father refused, but they did agree on the DNR. They said that I had a ninety-five percent chance of going into cardiac arrest. They brought everyone up to say goodbye. About 11:00-ish that night they rushed me to surgery thinking I had a bowel obstruction. (Why, if I was on a DNR (do not resuscitate order)? - no one can answer.) Well on the table, I had again dropped my blood oxygen, heart rate, and there was little to no brain function. Only for a minute or so. Then I returned to normal, and made it through surgery. A week later they decided to give me nutrition, I came out of my coma, and they kept me in a drug induced coma for a few weeks. On Thanksgiving, I was transferred to a rehabilitation hospital, and today I have very little resounding effects.
Now, that was where I was at on the outside. But on the inside, I was everywhere. But mainly I was in a desert with this old Hispanic woman in a red dress dabbing my forehead with a white gauze cloth. There were others around me. Very distraught.
It's like I lived other lives. None was my own. The people I knew, but the places were foreign. I was in Mexico a lot (or what I deciphered to be Mexico). I contracted a Mexican sexually transmitted disease and had to keep getting shots because I kept turning green. I lived in a city of 'infected' people. I lived in houses at times that were run down, walls missing shacks. I lived in one apartment with some old people, and the walls were only half high.
I met a man and fell in love. He was my - and I knew this - exact. I think he may have been Jesus. That's the feeling I have now about it.
I saw my deceased grandmother. She was irritated with me and said she was not here for me, that she was there to get someone else. (My grandfather died shortly after I was admitted to the hospital.) There are some other things that happened that I couldn't accurately put into words.
BUT the one thing that is miraculous is the Old Hispanic woman. Now, six months ago I started dating a guy that I had known for about four years. Well I went to his home and in his room, there was a picture of his mother. IT WAS HER! I asked him about her and he said she had passed away in October of 2004. I did not say anything to him about my experience. Other things have happened. I found out that she had been buried in a red dress. Now, I finally told John of this, and all he had to say was, 'Well, that sounds like her, always helping someone.'
Today, me and John are engaged to be married on March 11th, 2006. And magical things are happening. I am so afraid to tell anyone because I don't want to scare anyone.
Date NDE Occurred: October 2004
At the time of your experience, was there an associated life-threatening event? Uncertain Suicide attempt Clinical death (cessation of breathing or heart function or brain function) Not sure what you are asking.
How do you consider the content of your experience? Mixed
Did you feel separated from your body? No No
How did your highest level of consciousness and alertness during the experience compare to your normal everyday consciousness and alertness? Less consciousness and alertness than normal It was a different consciousness. As if, it were a different place. I was very conscious of everything around me, it was all clear as a bell, but it was not here.
At what time during the experience were you at your highest level of consciousness and alertness? One day, and I remember this, I sat up - full coma, when my Aunt Carol walked in and said, 'Hi Aunt Carol, you're here!' That was the first thing I had said in three weeks. That was the last thing I said for five weeks.
Towards the end, my dreams would incorporate my surroundings. It was not a realistic incorporation, but it came clearer over time.
Were your thoughts speeded up? Incredibly fast
Did time seem to speed up or slow down? Everything seemed to be happening at once; or time stopped or lost all meaning I knew there was a before and an after. That there was a space - I want to say a week, were there was nothing. No memories.
Were your senses more vivid than usual? Incredibly more vivid
Did your vision differ in any way from normal? It was brighter.
Did you seem to be aware of things going on elsewhere? Yes, and the facts have been checked out
Did you pass into or through a tunnel? No I felt that the desert was a holding area. One of my last 'dreams' was of a cold room with tiled everything and a pool of water that glowed. I was back on this side, in my hospital bed. But I don't remember going in or out of that pool. I knew it was a basement room (I was on the 18th floor in actuality).
The experience included: Presence of deceased persons
Did you see any beings in your experience? I actually saw them
Did you encounter or become aware of any deceased (or alive) beings? Yes Lots of people wearing Gold Medallions.
Did you see, or feel surrounded by, a brilliant light? A light clearly of mystical or other-worldly origin
Did you see an unearthly light? Yes In the water.
The experience included: A landscape or city
Did you seem to enter some other, unearthly world? A clearly mystical or unearthly realm Everything was beautiful. Mainly Mexico. The desert was beautiful. It was hot and sticky. (Why would a desert be humid???).
The experience included: Strong emotional tone
What emotions did you feel during the experience? Very intense emotions. When I was with the Mexican woman I felt peace. Most of all I felt peace. Just as I typed that I am realizing this.
When I was in rehab I used to close my eyes and try to get back there to that feeling by remembering the 'dreams'.
Did you have a feeling of peace or pleasantness? Incredible peace or pleasantness
Did you have a feeling of joy? incredible joy
Did you feel a sense of harmony or unity with the universe? I felt united or one with the world
The experience included: Special Knowledge
Did you suddenly seem to understand everything? Everything about the universe
Did scenes from your past come back to you? My past flashed before me, out of my control I learned a lot that helps me today. I have a deep peace that everything is going to be okay. I have a heightened intuition. Things are just different. Can't explain it. I like to think that I went and had a meeting with God, and we negotiated and he gave me better tools for living. My depression is nearly gone. And I am much happier. I feel young and alive now. Before I was sad, old, and depressed.
Did scenes from the future come to you? Scenes from the world's future I wonder sometimes if being in an 'infected' city was something of the future, because I was older. And there were levels of vaccines. I had this disease two times so I had to get the second level shot. And all of the vaccine places were very Third World. Many cabbage fields. (Not sure what made me remember that.)
Did you come to a border or point of no return? I came to a barrier that I was not permitted to cross; or was sent back against my will
God, Spiritual and Religion:
What was your religion prior to your experience? Moderate Lifelong Presbyterian
Have your religious practices changed since your experience? Yes I hate religion! I feel really strongly that religion is a barrier between me and Jesus/God.
What is your religion now? Liberal Non-Denominational
Did you have a change in your values and beliefs because of your experience? Yes I hate religion! I feel really strongly that religion is a barrier between me and Jesus/God.
Did you seem to encounter a mystical being or presence, or hear an unidentifiable voice? I encountered a definite being, or a voice clearly of mystical or unearthly origin
Did you see deceased or religious spirits? I actually saw them
Concerning our Earthly lives other than Religion:
During your experience, did you gain special knowledge or information about your purpose? Uncertain
Have your relationships changed specifically because of your experience? Yes I work at getting along with people. I am not the center of my universe anymore. I am fairer with people.
After the NDE:
Was the experience difficult to express in words? Yes The feeling that I have now. Not enlightenment, but a deeper knowledge of what is going on.
Do you have any psychic, non-ordinary or other special gifts after your experience that you did not have before the experience? Yes I know things that are deeper than face value. My friends very often come to me with their dreams to interpret, I nail it usually one hundred percent. I have a gut level understanding of how the universe works. Everything works together.
Are there one or several parts of your experience that are especially meaningful or significant to you? What John's mother did for me.
Have you ever shared this experience with others? Yes I shared it with my mother immediately when I was able to talk again. I shared this with John last November of 2005. And with my dad recently, because it was the last time I was to see his mother (I know that - but I keep it to myself). I wanted her to know where I was. I don't know if they were influenced - they all seem to just be okay with it. They were in awe. But they just understood.
Did you have any knowledge of near death experience (NDE) prior to your experience? No
What did you believe about the reality of your experience shortly (days to weeks) after it happened? Experience was definitely real. But I did not think about it - it took a while for the fog to clear.
What do you believe about the reality of your experience now? Experience was definitely real. The more I think about it, and especially today - the more I write and tell people about it, the more the pieces fit. I have realizations about the experience.
At any time in your life, has anything ever reproduced any part of the experience? No
Is there anything else that you would like to add about your experience? If there was a safe way to do this, I would recommend this to others. This experience was truly Serendipity!!