This is the day that I tell you the story of love. We went to the mountains to go skiing. Little did I know that it would change my life. We entered a wonderful condominium. No worries or cares. I was just thankful to be away from the everyday hustle and bustle. The next day we would all go skiing. We got off to a late start with the ski rental and a glitch with a ski pass, but it all happened exactly as it was meant to, now that I see it from a new perspective. All of that was intended. It was timed perfectly for me to see the woman with one and a half legs while we finally waited in line for the chair lift. I remember being deeply thankful for my two legs. Then, of course, my mind drifting to the fact that it was hot and we were sweating while we waited to get on the chair lift. I knew that was a significant moment, thinking of that woman, but not until later would I understand why.
It was a beautiful warm sunny day for skiing with a lot a snow and there were so many people on the hill. We headed off to the green ski run to get the boys used to skiing for the season. It was wonderful. Then, on our second or third time skiing down the same run, it happened. The boys were all down the hill. Now, I could follow like a momma bear and make sure that they were all safe. When I looked up the hill, to start on my way, I saw him coming and I saw the fear in his eyes. He knew that he was going to hit me and I knew I was going to be hit. In the next moment, I was under him in absolute pain and nothing else in the world existed. I am sorry, but all I could do was curse.
Finally, my mind came back to the people around me and I felt sorry for the boy that ran into me. He was the age of my son and all I saw in his eyes were sorrow and tears. My heart went out to him. I tried to move my leg to get up to move on with the day and I realized that it was not going to happen that way. I now knew the day was going to look different than I had hoped. My leg was broken. I tried to console the sweet boy sitting next to me and tell him that it was probably just bruising, but we both knew that statement was a complete lie.
The ski patrol person was now looking at me and with intensity I looked straight into his eyes and with my mouth, but not a voice, said, ‘It's broken.’ Before I knew it, I was on a sled going down the hill looking up into the sky. I was in intense pain and praying for the bottom of the hill to be close in time. As soon as I reached the emergency room, I was thankful and resolved as to whatever was going to happen next. The x-ray confirmed what I already knew, a broken tibia and fibula in my right leg. On to the hospital, to where I would spend the next three days.
I remembered the conversation that I had with the woman in the ambulance. It all is so amazing. She said, ‘Well, maybe you can use this as an opportunity to become enlightened.’ My response was ‘I am already enlightened, but maybe it will become deepened.’ She was there for a reason saying these words and I had a deep knowing that what I said was the truth. There was nowhere else to be, but in that present moment. I didn't know what was going to happen in the future. At the hospital, while waiting for the room, all of the medical history was taken and I was given pain medication.
Off to the room for surgery that night. A rod was secured to the fibula to give stability to the leg. I was put on an IV for pain medication. It had a button that I could push that was on a timer so that I could not overdose. The first night there wasn't much sleep for me. By the second night, I was so exhausted. Finally, I fell asleep.
It was the most peaceful sleep ever. In fact, it was so peaceful that I didn't want to wake up. It was as if I was separate from my body. I was a warm energy presence above my chest and in that presence there was nothing but stillness and peace. Nothing affected me. Nothing in the physical world mattered. All was perfect for ‘good’ or ‘bad,’ it just was. God held the future. There was nothing to worry about. Where I was, above myself, nothing to fear because everything was perfect, even fear was perfect and there was a nonjudgmental knowing that there was a reason for fear.
When I was out of my body, I didn't worry about anyone on earth because I knew that they have inside of each of them what I was feeling in that moment, which was peace and that God unconditionally loved them. It was as if they were each being engulfed in God’s love, which was better than anything that I could possibly get close to providing. That their lives were going to happen perfectly, according to how they needed it to happen with God. It was all perfect.
There was nothing to fear because fear is not real. Fear is the result of thinking that things are not perfect. But everything is perfect. The reason for fear is to see the light. It's to understand and to be able to feel peace. If we didn't know fear then we wouldn't be able to recognize and appreciate peace. I'm so thankful for the contrast, but I chose peace. That's free will: the choice to choose fear or to choose peace. So, how do we choose no fear? How do we choose peace? We choose by being aware of what we are feeling and by asking ourselves, ‘Am I in fear right now or am I in peace and joy right now?’ If we want to grow to become less fearful then ask yourself, ‘where is the fear originating and how can I understand and dispel the fear so that I can grow stronger towards no fear in order to live more peacefully?’ When we understand where the fear comes from it has a way of disappearing because, in a sense, you realize that fear is not real and it is a thought that you have made up in your mind. Then you can be back within yourself and be content again.
Sometimes when I have fear, all I do is simply concentrate, count to five, remember that all is well and the fear loses its power. I am then back into the present moment and I get on with my day. When I came back into my body, I opened my eyes and it seemed as though I was under two inches of water. I heard people in the room and wanted them to know that I was awake because I could feel their fearful energy within them wanting me to wake up. I forcefully tried to talk and the first thing that popped into my mind was ‘help me’.
It worked; I could feel the people sigh in relief. Quickly, they canceled all of the medical interventions that they were getting ready to implement. Everyone scattered about the room. Each had their own energy. I still felt peace so their energy didn't bother me, but I quickly became aware of how important it is to be a person with positive and calm energy because others can feel it. Now I live my life with a knowing that everything is happening perfectly. Even the difficult times, like a broken leg, is perfect. Look at the beauty that has been provided. I have zero worries. All things work out for the good. Everything happens for a reason. There are no coincidences. We are all unconditionally loved.
Date NDE Occurred: 1/25/14
At the time of your experience, was there an associated life-threatening event? No Drug or medication overdose 'Illness, trauma or other condition not considered life threatening'
How do you consider the content of your experience? Entirely pleasant
The experience included: Out of body experience
Did you feel separated from your body? No
I lost awareness of my body
How did your highest level of consciousness and alertness during the experience compare to your normal everyday consciousness and alertness? More consciousness and alertness than normal It was stillness, peaceful, and free from all fear.
At what time during the experience were you at your highest level of consciousness and alertness? When it felt like time was linear and I understood that everything happens in the world perfectly.
Were your thoughts speeded up? No
Did time seem to speed up or slow down? Everything seemed to be happening at once; or time stopped or lost all meaning
There wasn't time just the presence of now.
Were your senses more vivid than usual? More vivid than usual
Please compare your vision during the experience to your everyday vision that you had immediately prior to the time of the experience. Same vision
Please compare your hearing during the experience to your everyday hearing that you had immediately prior to the time of the experience. Same hearing
Did you seem to be aware of things going on elsewhere? No
Did you pass into or through a tunnel? No
Did you see any beings in your experience? No
Did you encounter or become aware of any deceased (or alive) beings? No
Did you see, or feel surrounded by, a brilliant light? No
Did you see an unearthly light? No
Did you seem to enter some other, unearthly world? No
What emotions did you feel during the experience? Peace, contentment
Did you have a feeling of peace or pleasantness? Incredible peace or pleasantness
Did you have a feeling of joy? Happiness
Did you feel a sense of harmony or unity with the universe? I felt united or one with the world
Did you suddenly seem to understand everything? Everything about myself or others I was shown that nothing is judged and everyone is on a journey with God.
Did scenes from your past come back to you? No
Did scenes from the future come to you? No
Did you come to a border or point of no return? No
God, Spiritual and Religion:
What importance did you place on your religious/spiritual life prior to your experience? Moderately important to me
What was your religion prior to your experience? Other faiths- New age Catholic upbringing
Became spiritual at age 44
Have your religious practices changed since your experience? No
What importance do you place on your religious/spiritual life after your experience? Greatly important to me
What is your religion now? Other faiths- New age
Did your experience include features consistent with your earthly beliefs? Content that was both consistent and not consistent with the beliefs you had at the time of your experience I had read many many books on spirituality, but the experience made all of what I was educated about a reality. Instead of trying to believe it, I now KNOW it.
Did you have a change in your values and beliefs because of your experience? Yes Respect everyone no matter what, because God has a plan for each person and it's all happening perfectly the way that it is supposed to happen.
Did you seem to encounter a mystical being or presence, or hear an unidentifiable voice? No
Did you see deceased or religious spirits? No
Did you encounter or become aware of any beings who previously lived on earth who are described by name in religions (for example: Jesus, Muhammad, Buddha, etc.)? No
During your experience, did you gain information about premortal existence? No
During your experience, did you gain information about universal connection or oneness? Yes I experienced that human create turmoil and the loving energy is with us at all times patiently loving and kind guiding us when we are free from fear. I do not need to be concerned about anyone because God is with them. I know that God is guiding them. I
Did you believe in the existence of God prior to your experience? God definitely exists
During your experience, did you gain information about the existence of God? Yes God is loving energy and with us in every moment.
Do you believe in the existence of God after your experience? God definitely exists
Concerning our Earthly lives other than Religion:
During your experience, did you gain special knowledge or information about your purpose? No
Did you believe that our earthly lives are meaningful and significant prior to your experience? Are meaningful and significant
During your experience, did you gain information about the meaning of life? Yes Be in joy and happiness knowing that everything is perfect and have fun knowing that everything that is supposed to happen, will happen. Watch God work through you.
Did you believe in an afterlife prior to your experience? An afterlife definitely exists
Do you believe in an afterlife after your experience? An afterlife definitely exists Yes There is no beginning or end. All exists together.
Did you fear death prior to your experience? I did not fear death
Do you fear death after your experience? I do not fear death
Were you fearful living your life prior to your experience? Moderately fearful in living my earthly life
Were you fearful living your life after your experience? Not fearful in living my earthly life
Did you believe that our earthly lives are meaningful and significant prior to your experience? Are meaningful and significant
Did you believe that our earthly lives are meaningful and significant after your experience? Are meaningful and significant
Did you gain information about how to live our lives? Yes When you are in joy you are with God energy.
Even when you are in sorrow , that is part of your life journey.
There is no wrong or right. All is perfect.
During your experience, did you gain information about life's difficulties, challenges and hardships? Yes Fear, difficulties and struggles are man made. When challenges happen that are out of your control, like a skiing collision, that is meant to be also. Look all that I was shown in the hospital and now waiting for the leg to heal. Usually I never sit and b
Were you compassionate prior to your experience? Moderately compassionate toward others
During your experience, did you gain information about love? Yes Love is all that is real.
Were you compassionate after your experience? Greatly compassionate toward others
What life changes occurred in your life after your experience? Large changes in my life Large changes in my life. I used to think that we needed to call upon God to be there and now I know that God is just there and there is nothing that we need to do. No matter what, we are guided. Be at peace and know that you are guided and unconditionally loved. There is no right or wrong, just choices. There is no time.
Have your relationships changed specifically because of your experience? Yes Yes I accept that everyone, including myself, is in the perfect place for them in every moment of the day.
After the NDE:
Was the experience difficult to express in words? No
How accurately do you remember the experience in comparison to other life events that occurred around the time of the experience? I remember the experience more accurately than other life events that occurred around the time of the experience That experience has changed how I live my life and is clear and vivid and the first thing that I think of when I wake up each morning.
Do you have any psychic, non-ordinary or other special gifts after your experience that you did not have before the experience? No
Have you ever shared this experience with others? No
Did you have any knowledge of near death experience (NDE) prior to your experience? Yes I have seen shows on TV and books about them, but mine was different. I didn't see a white light. I stayed near my body. I was shown the essence of God and how life works.
What did you believe about the reality of your experience shortly (days to weeks) after it happened? Experience was definitely real The more time passes the more I appreciate all that was shown to me. It seemed like seconds but the medical professionals reported 22 minutes of trying to wake me.
What do you believe about the reality of your experience now? Experience was definitely real It was real.
At any time in your life, has anything ever reproduced any part of the experience? No