I died. Simply, I died. I was there, in the ICU....They were trying to save me...but I still died. Death was not bad. Jesus was really there. He and I were looking over the edge of the pit, sort of looking at where hell was. It reminded me of when I was little, looking over the edge of a bridge to the water below....it wasn't scary, just looking. He put His Arm around me. He loved me. Perhaps we were looking back at earth, I don't know. I want more recollection of it all, because it is so important.. but as I said above, they were giving me medicines, and I just can't remember everything. But I know I was There!! And I know I died. And I know that I woke up again in my own body, and I was SO SAD. Sad beyond words. I had been to Freedom with God...now I was trapped back here.
Date NDE Occurred: 2/98
At the time of your experience, was there an associated life-threatening event? Yes Illness pneumonia
died 3 times Clinical death I was dying from pneumonia. No air. No heartbeat. 3 times. What can I say?
How do you consider the content of your experience? Disturbing
Did you feel separated from your body? Uncertain I was just "Myself" for whatever that means. I know the Doctors and Nurses were doing there best to help me, I know they wanted to save me...but I was already far away by then. And it was much better there than here. I thank them for their hard work, and their concern, but where I was, was still better than here.
At what time during the experience were you at your highest level of consciousness and alertness? I was pretty alert. Aware of pain, and their efforts to save my life just before I slipped away. It was better there, than it is here.
Did time seem to speed up or slow down? Everything seemed to be happening at once; or time stopped or lost all meaning
Did your hearing differ in any way from normal? I heard things going on around me in the ICU. I heard the people. I heard their concern. And then, whooooosh, I was somewhere else. And I liked it there. It was warm. It was friendly. God was there. All was well. And it was better there.
Did you pass into or through a tunnel? Uncertain I went through a 'barrier' yes. Not a tunnel, not that light tube thing that so many people describe.... but some sort of 'barrier', yes. I went from 'here' to 'there'. I don't know 'where' that is, but it was nice there, and I was so angry when I found out that I was not there anymore. Still so angry
Did you encounter or become aware of any deceased (or alive) beings? Yes Jesus was there. He was kind, warm, gentle, loving, and he cared about me. He received me. He is REAL. I always believed in Him before...but now I can promise that he is REAL.
The experience included: Void
The experience included: Light
Did you see an unearthly light? Uncertain see above answer
Did you seem to enter some other, unearthly world? A clearly mystical or unearthly realm
The experience included: Strong emotional tone
What emotions did you feel during the experience? emotions? Try to describe the universe. That's how I felt. There is no explanation. It is beyond all words I know.
The experience included: Special Knowledge
Did you suddenly seem to understand everything? Everything about the universe
Did scenes from your past come back to you? My past flashed before me, out of my control
The experience included: Vision of the future
The experience included: Boundary
Did you reach a boundary or limiting physical structure? Yes I was here and then I died. And then I went "there". I don't know how to describe it. But it was wonderful, it was warm, it was nice, and I much prefer it to here. I did not want to come back to here.
Did you come to a border or point of no return? I came to a barrier that I was not permitted to cross; or was sent back against my will I was sent back...but I did not want to come back. I wanted to stay there. Living is the hard part. Being with God is the good part.
God, Spiritual and Religion:
What was your religion prior to your experience? Conservative/fundamentalist
What is your religion now? Conservative/fundamentalist
Did you have a change in your values and beliefs because of your experience? Yes I am such a different person. Not much that I thought was important before I died really is important. Now I feel foreign to this world.
The experience included: Presence of unearthly beings
After the NDE:
Was the experience difficult to express in words? Yes Absolutely no one can understand where I have been, unless they have been there too. I have tried to explain this to my family members....but to no avail. I feel alone. I feel like no one really understands where I have been. Impossible to communicate?? That's an understatement! There aren't any words that I can find to describe what happened.
Do you have any psychic, non-ordinary or other special gifts after your experience that you did not have before the experience? No
Are there one or several parts of your experience that are especially meaningful or significant to you? worst: I feel so disconnected from everything around me now.
Have you ever shared this experience with others? Yes No one believes me. They say it was just drugs and medicines. But I know for real I was there. There is another place beyond here; Jesus is there. This is not the end. There is so much more to life. No one who was not been there will understand you . When you talk about it. IF they have not been there, they will say you are crazy. You're not!
At any time in your life, has anything ever reproduced any part of the experience? No