After having been exposed to the Catholic Church's moral tradition and what I felt were false teachings, I became confused about all things about my life. There were other negative influences in my life at the time and life became too much for me to handle. I wrote a note that I was leaving this earth, orally took an overdose of pills. I lay down in my bed and waited to see what was going to happen.
I wanted to see my relatives whom I loved. I remember that I felt like I was physically moving up and/or down in direction as grave headstones flashed by me. I couldn't make out the names on the headstones. Before I knew it, I was sitting on a bench in the park. My surroundings were dimly lit and not of this earth. It was beautifully quiet.
Then I noticed an older man sitting next to me. I got the impression that we were the only two there. He was not old in an age sense, but he was an elder. I got a great feeling from this man. Then I saw us from a different viewpoint. I saw us sitting on the same bench, but I was standing behind the bench at a distance. He asked me what was wrong and why I was there. I told him some personal information, including the name of a male individual. He told me that they knew who this man was. After I told him what was bothering me, he told me that I was perfectly all right, and there was something about the man next to me that caused me to know it was true. There was nothing wrong with me. He was so understanding and otherworldly, beautiful in the most practical sense. I agreed to something, probably to live my life new, and I jolted up in the bed.
I stumbled out of my room, made it down the stairway, and half-falling as I hit the living room door. My sister told my mother that I had overdosed myself. They called an ambulance. I was taken to one of the local hospitals and kept for psychiatric observation for a period of time. I was released and saw life in a whole new way.
Date NDE Occurred: Approx. 1989
At the time of your experience, was there an associated life-threatening event? Uncertain Suicide attempt. Other: After a valium overdose, I went to sleep, but it was much different than sleep, in my experience.
After a drug overdose, I went to sleep, but my experience was much different than sleep.
How do you consider the content of your experience? Entirely pleasant
The experience included: Out of body experience
Did you feel separated from your body? Yes The facts have been checked out.
I clearly left my body and existed outside it
How did your highest level of consciousness and alertness during the experience compare to your normal everyday consciousness and alertness? More consciousness and alertness than normal I felt like someone had splashed a bucket of cold water in my face. That's the closest way I can say it. I bolted out of bed with a vibrancy that I can't explain, especially given the fact that I had taken all those pills. I don't know the time period between the time I took the pills and the time I woke up, but I can tell you I woke up all right. The feeling stayed with me for years, and even to this day. Ever since, I have been aware of the danger of any formal moral teachings and the consequences of those teachings. I went on seeking spiritual knowledge. I grew in self with this acquired spiritual knowledge. I am now myself and love myself.
At what time during the experience were you at your highest level of consciousness and alertness? When I awoke from my bed and after I was released from psychiatric observation. It was either a 10 day or 30 day stay most likely.
Were your thoughts speeded up? Incredibly fast
Did time seem to speed up or slow down? Everything seemed to be happening at once; or time stopped or lost all meaning
Time didn't matter. It was if things were getting settled and nothing was more important.
Were your senses more vivid than usual? Incredibly more vivid
Please compare your vision during the experience to your everyday vision that you had immediately prior to the time of the experience. My senses were keener and sharper. I remember looking at the trees when I was released from the Psychiatric unit and said, 'They're alive.' My truest friend was there and he remembers it completely. Before, I saw trees as just plants.
Please compare your hearing during the experience to your everyday hearing that you had immediately prior to the time of the experience. I was a guitar player and a pretty accomplished musician. Before the experience I heard things as sounds, afterward I heard things as vibrations and energy, creating the sound. It was very different.
Did you seem to be aware of things going on elsewhere? Yes, and the facts have been checked out
Did you pass into or through a tunnel? Uncertain I felt as though I was travelling either upward or downward in direction. Looking back at it, it was probably upward, as images like the headstones were falling downward. I was rising above them. I was travelling very, very fast.
Did you see any beings in your experience? No
Did you encounter or become aware of any deceased (or alive) beings? Yes I encountered only the elder man who was a guide. He was very much alive, but I did not see his face.
Did you see, or feel surrounded by, a brilliant light? A light clearly of mystical or other-worldly origin
Did you see an unearthly light? Yes It was dimly lit, but lit. The light was very discreet. I can remember seeing a park light. The tall kind, but it was glowing so discreetly, and very serenely.
The experience included: A landscape or city
Did you seem to enter some other, unearthly world? A clearly mystical or unearthly realm The atmosphere was mystical, ethereal, and very real. It was not dreamlike.
The experience included: Strong emotional tone
What emotions did you feel during the experience? Total true love, security, acceptance, patience, and understanding
Did you have a feeling of peace or pleasantness? Incredible peace or pleasantness
Did you have a feeling of joy? incredible joy
Did you feel a sense of harmony or unity with the universe? I felt united or one with the world
The experience included: Special knowledge or purpose
Did you suddenly seem to understand everything? Everything about myself or others Then I can say I understood myself and others. There was a Universal element to it that has progressed.
Did scenes from your past come back to you? I remembered many past events I remembered many past events. I saw that the moral judgments, false consequences, and subsequent condemnation of souls, along with their other false teachings, formerly made in my presence by Formal Religious people, were false, and was to be shunned. I also was told by this elder guide to watch out for the Media and their deceptive ways. I was made aware of how vulnerable I was, in the past, to such atrocious mind sets, and how fortunate I was to have not been influenced and/or hurt permanently.
Did scenes from the future come to you? Scenes from the world's future I saw what would probably happen if and when people took a certain course. I saw the mindset of people had everything to do with where it would lead. I also was made aware that my personal future was up to me.
The experience included: Boundary
Did you reach a boundary or limiting physical structure? Uncertain I'm not sure I understand the question.
Did you come to a border or point of no return? I came to a barrier that I was not permitted to cross; or was sent back against my will I came back knowing that who I was and how I was living my life was absolutely perfect. I came back knowing God and I were one. I came back free from any form of Social Conditioning. I came back feeling one with the Universe, growing to understand that I am the Universe. I came back knowing that people need to experience what life really is in order to live it and thus won't ever interfere with others lives. I came back knowing we are all one, yet each different. I came back complete.
God, Spiritual and Religion:
What importance did you place on your religious/spiritual life prior to your experience? Moderately important to me
What was your religion prior to your experience? Christian- Catholic I'll say that the moral so-called "teaching" of the Catholic Church, was one of the direct influences on me, while taking the overdose of Valium.
Have your religious practices changed since your experience? Yes When I was at the Psychiatric Ward, a Care Person there asked me 'Are you Religious?' I replied, '100%.' I don't know if it was a sarcastic answer or if some of it was true. In hindsight, what I was saying was, 'Yeah, I had that stuff imprinted on me when I was born (Baptism, First Communion, Confirmation) but I deep down don't believe any of it.' By the way, I don't blame my parents for it. They never sold any of it on me or even asked me politely to go to Church. I did that on my own. I knew I had to find out for myself what a crock it was. I did find out. I even attended Catholic Mass years after my experience. I didn't go to disrupt it. I just wanted to look at it from the eyes of a Spiritual Master. I grew to be a Spiritual Master through seeking the truth. I wouldn't step foot inside a Church of any kind now, because I am a Church. I also stay away from the woo- woo New Age, because it is a mere dishonest correction of a mistake. One illusion leads to the next for them. I'm more than that. I'm the Universe in a 5'9’, 185 lbs. frame. I don't meditate as a rule, life is a meditation. I'm presently putting my Spirituality to use by enjoying the non-local company of other Spiritual Masters like myself. Thanks to You Tube and other real honest media, we can do that.
What importance do you place on your religious/spiritual life after your experience? Greatly important to me
What is your religion now? Other or several faiths I am a highly spiritually enlightened soul, with absolutely no Religious attachments and/or identifications. I will say that the Buddhist and Hindu faiths, I find to be as close to truly enlightened
Did your experience include features consistent with your earthly beliefs? Content that was both consistent and not consistent with the beliefs you had at the time of your experience I don't think I believed the Religious and especially the Catholic Churches' moral teachings and subsequent condemnation, if not followed. I can't say that I believed the Social Conditioning either. I can't say that I believed the Media and their dishonesty either. Living in this place around dishonest people and corruption was in question, until I was made aware that, I can live my life in this place, and live it blissfully and fully, regardless of the relative nonsensical, without ever taking any **** from anyone, anytime, and never being hurt by it. I saw that I could actually live life to the fullest at every moment, knowing that everyone gets what they ask for in life.
Did you have a change in your values and beliefs because of your experience? Yes I became loving in the true sense. I saw people, places, things, and happenings for what they really were under the surface. I became less interested in beliefs and lived in the knowing. I grew very intuitive and apply it at every moment of my life. I value honesty to the fullest. I began living honestly at every moment, still do, and always will. In doing so, I have it to spare in abundance for others. I can sense when it is not present in others and I'm not afraid of it. I know that it cannot harm me. Sometimes there are moments when I make others aware of their dishonesty, for their own good and the good of others. No reason for judgment or defense. Sometime I keep it to myself, in the knowing. I learned discernment and to apply it at every moment of my life. I am entirely grateful to God for my life, in that he shared his divinity with me, as equal, without stipulations or condemnation.
The experience included: Presence of unearthly beings
Did you seem to encounter a mystical being or presence, or hear an unidentifiable voice? I encountered a definite being, or a voice clearly of mystical or unearthly origin Before I encounter the man in the park, I heard a shuffling of voices. It sounded like they were consulting one another. There were female light voices present. It was as if they were organizing things. The closest way I can describe it is that they were there to direct me to where I needed to be. Then I found myself with the Guide that I encountered. His voice was wise and guide-like. His voice was in a normal tone, yet very understanding, patient, kind, non-judgmental, loving, and firm.
Did you see deceased or religious spirits? No
Did you encounter or become aware of any beings who previously lived on earth who are described by name in religions (for example: Jesus, Muhammad, Buddha, etc.)? No
During your experience, did you gain information about premortal existence? No
During your experience, did you gain information about universal connection or oneness? Yes When the man being (Guide) spoke that "We know who he is", I was made aware of the Universal connection. I made reference to another person to the Guide, and I could just tell he knew him. When the voices were in consultation, they were united in their purpose. I was made aware of the Universal connection between all living beings, places, and things.
Did you believe in the existence of God prior to your experience? God definitely exists
During your experience, did you gain information about the existence of God? Yes I was made aware that God is in us and we in him. I was made aware there is no separation. We are living proof. I was made aware that I am his because I am him and he is me. I was made aware that the Social Conditioning and subsequent Mind Sets of people, put there from, and for the dishonest purposes of control and manipulation, born from fear, are the cause of any thinking to the contrary. I was made aware this is not a point of view, but a life absolute. I was
made aware of freewill and its' total value. I was made aware to live this truth and never have to try to sell it to anyone at any moment. I was made aware that I have nothing to prove.
Do you believe in the existence of God after your experience? God definitely exists
Concerning our Earthly lives other than Religion:
During your experience, did you gain special knowledge or information about your purpose? Yes I was made aware that I am God and God is me. There is no separation. I was made aware of that the interpretation we place on everyone and everything determines our experiences in life. I was made aware to avoid falseness in every form for it is man-made. I was made aware of how precious life really is when lived honestly and fully. I learned people have the ability to fool not just others, but it always starts with them, when they act dishonestly. I learned my purpose is to live a Godly life at each and every moment.
Did you believe that our earthly lives are meaningful and significant prior to your experience? Are meaningful and significant
During your experience, did you gain information about the meaning of life? Yes Yes. I was made aware that living is a purpose. There are purposes plural in life, however life is the purpose. It is ours to live it fully and completely, without fear, guilt, shame, insecurity, etc.
Did you believe in an afterlife prior to your experience? An afterlife definitely exists
Do you believe in an afterlife after your experience? An afterlife definitely exists Yes I was aware that I was surrounded by pure, unconditional love. I was fully alive, the voices were real, the place was real, and the man being (Guide) was real. It wasn't the kind of earthly love.
Did you fear death prior to your experience? I slightly feared death
Do you fear death after your experience? I do not fear death
Were you fearful living your life prior to your experience? Slightly fearful in living my earthly life
Were you fearful living your life after your experience? Not fearful in living my earthly life
Did you believe that our earthly lives are meaningful and significant prior to your experience? Are meaningful and significant
Did you believe that our earthly lives are meaningful and significant after your experience? Are meaningful and significant
Did you gain information about how to live our lives? Yes I was made fully aware to never let a person, group of people, or entity, tell me that I am not God and God is not me. The proof is in the pudding and here I am.
During your experience, did you gain information about life's difficulties, challenges and hardships? Yes I was made aware of the fact that people, such as those in Formal Religion, The Media, Socially Conditioned People, have an agenda that is alot of times, built upon selfishness, and is damaging. I was made aware they are sometime consciously aware and sometime they are not. I was made aware that it will always be obvious to everyone. I was made aware that this does not detract from life. Just being aware it exists is enough. I was made aware that my being defenseless, in a Godly sense, won't stop their momentum from taking themselves over the cliff, if that's what they manifest for themselves. I was made aware to never feel bad for those who make choices out of selfishness.
Were you compassionate prior to your experience? Moderately compassionate toward others
During your experience, did you gain information about love? Yes I was made aware of the experience of unconditional love in action. I felt it all around me.
Were you compassionate after your experience? Greatly compassionate toward others
What life changes occurred in your life after your experience? Large changes in my life. My life took on another dimension from a truly enlightened perspective. I was fortunate to have a wonderful friend who, to his credit, told me the truths I came to experience. I became who and what I was put here for by God, and that is to be Him in the flesh, as he is Spirit. It's a tall order and I'm comfortable with it, because I'm not the only one, obviously. When I refer to God as a He, it is merely a word reference. God is Spirit and more than a ‘him’ or ‘her’. Like ourselves, we may be male and female, yet when we are whole we embody the both. In truth we are Spirit in bodies. I also had an even great experience at the age of 35 years, which was the total mind-blower of my life. That experience again was foretold by my friend, who didn't tell me what would happen, but did say that if I lived to be 35 years, I would live a long time. It all came true. I don't want to ramble into that one, but it was real alright. Large changes in my life. My life took on another dimension from a truly enlightened perspective. I was fortunate to have a wonderful friend who, to his credit, told me the truths I came to experience. I became who and what I was put here for by God, and that is to be Him in the flesh, as he is Spirit. It's a tall order and I'm comfortable with it, because I'm not the only one, obviously. When I refer to God as a He, it is merely a word reference. God is Spirit and more than a ‘him’ or ‘her’. Like ourselves, we may be male and female, yet when we are whole we embody the both. In truth we are Spirit in bodies. I also had an even great experience at the age of 35 years, which was the total mind-blower of my life. That experience again was foretold by my friend, who didn't tell me what would happen, but did say that if I lived to be 35 years, I would live a long time. It all came true. I don't want to ramble into that one, but it was real alright.
Have your relationships changed specifically because of your experience? Yes My interpretation of people is true. I can see who wants to help, who wants to hurt, and who really doesn't care. In the past, I have to admit, I remained in the present of those who want to hurt, and who really didn't care. I did this knowing that these people couldn't hurt me. I waited for them to show their true colors, and let themselves burn themselves out. Their momentum took them where they chose, either consciously or unconsciously. It was simple. There are people who couldn't face me because they are dishonest with themselves. Then there are the honestly-aware people. I spend my moments these days with the honestly aware people. Some of these people have passed on, others are here on earth. The number of the people I enjoy the company of is many in acquaintances, and few in great friends. I prefer it this way.
After the NDE:
Was the experience difficult to express in words? No I have to say no. The hardest part was to edit it without rambling incoherently. There are no words to describe it as I lived it though.
How accurately do you remember the experience in comparison to other life events that occurred around the time of the experience? I remember the experience more accurately than other life events that occurred around the time of the experience I remember the experience more accurately than other life events that occurred around the time of the experience
Do you have any psychic, non-ordinary or other special gifts after your experience that you did not have before the experience? Yes Definitely. I became very intuitive. There is so much to the psychic realm, and I experienced all areas, to different degrees, at different moments. I took up Controlled Remote Viewing to harness it. I'm an Advanced Controlled Remote Viewer. I will help people with it. I have the gift of honesty and that is the greatest gift a person can embody. I say this because when it is shared, things go perfectly for everybody involved, and it is always in unlimited abundance. I learned I have the gift to do anything, anytime, and I will benefit, as well as everybody will benefit.
Are there one or several parts of your experience that are especially meaningful or significant to you? The entire experience was profoundly meaningful to me.
Have you ever shared this experience with others? Yes I told my best friend first, as soon as he came to visit me at the Hospital Psychiatric Unit. My sister came with him. As I outlined earlier, she was present, with my mother when the experience happened. She told my friend that she saw a change in me. I don't remember any details of what she told him. It didn't matter to me. My friend was a perfectly Spiritual man and interpreted it honestly and truthfully with me. I told a few others and they all knew I was telling the truth. I would say their impressions ranged from, 'that's cool' to 'what's for dinner?' depending on their frame of mind. People enjoyed being around me, I could see that, however, there were times for them when it was 'how much does he know?', and 'how will it affect me.' It was like I could see right through them. Some people stayed and confided in me, others stayed around me and were uncomfortable at times, and others took off like a bat out of hell. It depended on their honesty level and intentions.
Did you have any knowledge of near death experience (NDE) prior to your experience? Uncertain My friend was a perfectly Spiritual man and he related Supernatural things to me. I may have heard accounts of NDEs in passing, but that's about the extent of it.
What did you believe about the reality of your experience shortly (days to weeks) after it happened? Experience was definitely real I could feel things were leading up to it. It was just what the doctor ordered and I looked at it shortly after it happened as my formal introduction to the Truly Spiritual. I was exposed to such dishonesty before it happened, in the forms I mentioned prior, and I was also living in a sex, drugs, and rock n roll lifestyle. The honest simplicity of the experience, coupled with the unconditional love it imparted was blissful. I didn't try to sensationalize it, so I told only my friend at first. In a way I wanted to keep the experience a secret, but as time went on, I shared discerningly. I've only told a handful of people to this day.
What do you believe about the reality of your experience now? Experience was definitely real It was a pure gift of bliss and awareness. I know that I'm not alone in this Universe, and others have similar experiences. There is an order to the Universe and I am a part of it, because it is me and I am it. We are all united. We cannot be harmed. We are free to love unconditionally with perfect honesty. We don't lose loved ones through death. Death is an illusion, to keep the relative world alive. I went on to live Spiritually. I communicate very often with loved ones who have passed on to the hereafter. I'm aware of their presence at every moment. I'm aware there's no need for guilt, shame, or other negative thoughts, because there is no judgment or fear. I know that when I pass on from this earth, in a physical sense, that life beyond with my loved ones will be perfectly and profoundly bliss.
At any time in your life, has anything ever reproduced any part of the experience? Yes I'll never look at a park bench the same way again. I enjoy sitting in the Common Park where I live, and marvel at life. When I sleep, my connections to the non-local, non-physical manifest themselves. I enjoyed another life affirming miracle while sleeping, that I mentioned earlier. When I'm dreaming I know the difference between this experience and the one I had afterward. I dream lucidly.
Is there anything else that you would like to add about your experience? I'm glad to share it with you, as it's been a long period since it happened. I still don't find it something that I want to give away or sell. I consider Dr. Long's work completely honest and highly valuable. After watching him on You Tube, I decided that if you wanted to hear about my experience, then I would communicate it to you. This opportunity fell into my lap and I appreciate it fully. Thank you, Dr. Long, for your honest work and curiosity. It's the sign of a great mind. Dr. Greyson does a great job as well, thanks. Thank you to everyone else involved with this great endeavor.
Are there any other questions that we could ask to help you communicate your experience? I couldn't improve it. It's perfect. Thank you.