Experience Description

Two weeks after the birth of my second child, I was still experiencing a large amount of bleeding (fist-sized blood clots). My then-husband (now ex) took me to the nearest hospital in Olympia, WA, after he arrived home from school to find me going into shock. My skin was grey and clammy; the bleeding would not stop; I was freezing cold.

Shortly after we got to the emergency room, I could see only fuzzy images of the staff and my husband. I could hear them talking, but their speech became muffled (like the speech of the adults in Charlie Brown cartoons). I could only vaguely feel my husband's hand holding mine. Then a figure sort of ceased to be fuzzy. He did NOT just appear - he was there all along, but he just became clear while everyone else remained fuzzy. He took my hand, and I could feel each of his fingers. His voice was clear and normal while the others remained muffled. He wore white, but I don't know if it was a suit, a robe or something else. He said, ‘Don't be afraid.’ (Actually, I wasn't afraid to begin with, and I felt very calm at the sight of him.) He said some things that I have never repeated (and never will), and then said that we would be together someday.

I was transferred to another hospital in Lacey, WA and had a dilation and curettage (D & C) to remove part of the placenta that had not been expelled when my daughter was born. For the next 11 years, I assumed that, if the experience was even real, the man was an angel or someone that I would see someday in the afterlife.

I divorced my husband and moved several times with my children. We ended up where we are now last summer (2001). I came to the area several times, a few days at a time, and we moved here a few days before we were each to start school. I saw the man from this experience about 2 days after we settled in here. He does not seem to recognize me, but it is definitely him. He looks and sounds the same; he hasn't aged, though I think I would know him even if he had. Some of the things he said to me in 1990 have been validated, beginning immediately after I saw him. It is EXTREMELY frustrating to me that he does not recognize me (or is not letting on, if he does), because I know he is supposed to.

Background Information:

Gender: Female

Date NDE Occurred: June 19, 1990

NDE Elements:

At the time of your experience, was there an associated life-threatening event? Yes Childbirth Life threatening event, but not clinical death Blood loss, shock, and decrease in body temperature.

How do you consider the content of your experience? Mixed

Did you feel separated from your body? No

At what time during the experience were you at your highest level of consciousness and alertness? Hard to explain. I could not make out details of what was going on around me, but the man himself was crystal clear and I could hear even his breathing.

Did time seem to speed up or slow down? Everything seemed to be happening at once; or time stopped or lost all meaning I was in shock. I sort of had the impression for a while that this man and I were the only people in a small area, like reality consisted only of him and me in a sealed pocket of air (?).

Did you pass into or through a tunnel? No

Did you encounter or become aware of any deceased (or alive) beings? Yes See above.

The experience included: Light

Did you see an unearthly light? Yes Sort of. The man seemed much brighter than everyone else, but it was as though he himself was bright, not like there was light shining on him.

Did you seem to enter some other, unearthly world? No

The experience included: Strong emotional tone

What emotions did you feel during the experience? A sense of calm; awe; heightened love.

Did you suddenly seem to understand everything? Everything about the universe The man told me things that did come to be or to make sense.

Did scenes from your past come back to you? My past flashed before me, out of my control

The experience included: Vision of the future

Did scenes from the future come to you? Scenes from the world's future Quite.

Did you come to a border or point of no return? No

God, Spiritual and Religion:

What was your religion prior to your experience? Liberal Baha'i

What is your religion now? Liberal Leaning toward Buddhism

Did you have a change in your values and beliefs because of your experience? Yes Not so much immediately after, but after I came here and saw that this man is real, a lot of things fell into place. The person I was a year ago was very different from the person I was before the experience, and the person I am now is very different from the person I was a year ago. So many things seem to amuse me now.

After the NDE:

Was the experience difficult to express in words? Yes The quality of reality.

Do you have any psychic, non-ordinary or other special gifts after your experience that you did not have before the experience? Uncertain I noticed this to a slight degree before the experience, but SINCE then it has increased dramatically: When I hear about a person who is missing or was killed, I get an immediate mental picture of what happened to them, and whenever I later found out what did actually happen (which was not always the case), I saw that my picture was accurate.

Are there one or several parts of your experience that are especially meaningful or significant to you? The worst part was thinking for 11 years that this man was someone I'd see in the afterlife, only to meet him here and not be involved with him the way I would expect to be - very confusing. The best part is the person I've become!

Have you ever shared this experience with others? Yes I shared it with my sisters, my dad, and a teacher, but not until I came here and saw the man. It's not that I had forgotten about it, but I think I had forgotten the extent to which it was real. My teacher did not seem to know how to react; my sisters said they thought it was interesting, but I suspect they think I was hallucinating. My dad, who has a degree in psychology, suggested that I try to figure out whether or not something in my psyche might have made me attach the face of the man here to the memory of the man in the experience, and failing that, to consider the possibility that the experience was real and the man here may recognize me but not know what to do about it.

At any time in your life, has anything ever reproduced any part of the experience? Yes Have relived it in dreams several times since I moved here, to clarify what was said when I was unsure.

Is there anything else that you would like to add about your experience? For some reason, I developed several food allergies (specifically fruits) after the experience.

Are there any other questions that we could ask to help you communicate your experience? No, but you could put people in touch with others who have experienced the same sort of thing. I feel very isolated not being able to converse with anyone about it. In the space toward the top ‘Did your experience include’, you might add ‘PRESENCE OF OTHER PEOPLE’ to ‘PRESENCE OF UNEARTHLY BEINGS’ and ‘PRESENCE OF DECEASED PERSONS’.