Experience Description

According to the registered nurse, an old lady visiting someone in the hospital (Darien) saw me sitting in my car, looking 'dead.' I was taken by a stretcher into the emergency room. What I experienced was partly real. I saw two large men in all white (probably the attendants who carried me into the emergency room) standing by me as I sat in a white room. A doctor (I thought) started asking me many questions. At first I thought, 'Well, it's a hospital, so they have to fill out forms.' But he started to ask about back into my early childhood. I suddenly saw a large reel of film behind this 'doctor's' head. A hand came from the left and pulled the film out and I could see the negative images of my life. I yelled 'NO' and came 'to' in the emergency room. I was standing in the doorway of the room where they were actually working on me. I felt in the way. I asked a registered nurse, 'Should I go into the waiting room? That woman looks really sick.' I did not feel connected to my body at all. Nor did I know who she was. I started walking down the hall of the hospital and got very scared when I realized my shoulder was partway through the wall! Nobody was paying any attention to me. Suddenly, I was attached to my feet looking down into a rocky stream of water. Above was a canopy of trees. I felt like the trees were encouraging me to 'go.' I said NO and it was like diving off a diving board backwards into my body. I just fell into my body and said, 'Work.' The registered nurse said, 'No you don't, we just started you back up.' I told friends about this and they sent me books by Dr. Raymond Moody, etc. I hadn't heard of NDE at this time, to my memory, and I read a lot.

Background Information:

Gender: Male

Date NDE Occurred: Spring 1982

NDE Elements:

At the time of your experience, was there an associated life-threatening event? Yes Allergic reaction Life threatening event, but not clinical death 'heart & breathing stopped due to allergic reaction-defibrillation ''started me up again'' the RN said in the ER'. I was driving from cleaning a church in a part of Connecticut I'd not been to before, for a conference. I used cleaning solutions I'd never been exposed to before (ammonia and Pledge). As I was driving, I began to feel dizzy, so I pulled over to get off the road.

How do you consider the content of your experience?

The experience included: Out of body experience

Did you feel separated from your body? Yes
I clearly left my body and existed outside it

How did your highest level of consciousness and alertness during the experience compare to your normal everyday consciousness and alertness? Normal consciousness and alertness As above.

At what time during the experience were you at your highest level of consciousness and alertness? When the canopy of trees was overhead, I felt clear-thinking.

Were your thoughts speeded up? Incredibly fast

Did time seem to speed up or slow down? Everything seemed to be happening at once; or time stopped or lost all meaning I felt as if I had the choice to stay dead or alive.

Were your senses more vivid than usual? Incredibly more vivid

Did you seem to be aware of things going on elsewhere? Yes, and the facts have been checked out

Did you pass into or through a tunnel? No

Did you see any beings in your experience? I actually saw them

Did you encounter or become aware of any deceased (or alive) beings? Yes The trees seemed like living beings, sentient.

Did you see, or feel surrounded by, a brilliant light? A light clearly of mystical or other-worldly origin

Did you see an unearthly light? No Normal hospital type light.

Did you seem to enter some other, unearthly world? A clearly mystical or unearthly realm the canopy of trees & the creek looked like the place I later came to live in & where I met my future husband (Boulder, Colorado) but I'd never been there at the time of this "NDE"

What emotions did you feel during the experience? Confusion, anger, frustration and elation (canopy of trees) then resignation (falling back into my body).

Did you have a feeling of peace or pleasantness? Incredible peace or pleasantness

Did you have a feeling of joy? incredible joy

Did you feel a sense of harmony or unity with the universe? I felt united or one with the world

Did you suddenly seem to understand everything? Everything about the universe

The experience included: Life review

Did scenes from your past come back to you? My past flashed before me, out of my control Above, the film pulled out and I saw scenes from my real life: me as a toddler at the beach, climbing trees with my brother, etc. I felt alarmed, like I wasn't ready for this.

Did scenes from the future come to you? Scenes from the world's future It turned out later (in 1982) that I had seen a particular creek as viewed from the bridge next to the Boulder Library. But I hadn't been to Boulder at the time of the NDE.

Did you come to a border or point of no return? I came to a barrier that I was not permitted to cross; or was sent back against my will

God, Spiritual and Religion:

What was your religion prior to your experience? Liberal 'I was raised by non-religious scientists (RN & geologist) who did not want to influence my siblings & me toward or against religion. They exposed us to every type of idea, from early Greek to Native American (father is 1/3 Cherokee) to atheism.'

Have your religious practices changed since your experience? No

What is your religion now? Liberal 'I came to believe in Jesus at age 18 after a dramatic conversion. I consider myself ''a Jesus Freak.'''

Did you have a change in your values and beliefs because of your experience? No

Did you seem to encounter a mystical being or presence, or hear an unidentifiable voice? I encountered a definite being, or a voice clearly of mystical or unearthly origin

Did you see deceased or religious spirits? I actually saw them

Concerning our Earthly lives other than Religion:

During your experience, did you gain special knowledge or information about your purpose? No

Have your relationships changed specifically because of your experience? Yes I divorced the violent husband, moved from Connecticut to Colorado, later met, and married the man I have been married to for twenty years now

After the NDE:

Was the experience difficult to express in words? No

Do you have any psychic, non-ordinary or other special gifts after your experience that you did not have before the experience? No

Are there one or several parts of your experience that are especially meaningful or significant to you? I chose to continue living although I was in a very violent marriage at the time of the NDE and wanted to 'go' with the trees.

Have you ever shared this experience with others? Yes Two weeks.

Did you have any knowledge of near death experience (NDE) prior to your experience? No

What did you believe about the reality of your experience shortly (days to weeks) after it happened? Experience was probably real. Having a scientifically oriented childhood, I talked about this with my sister and we thought my brain was oxygen deprived.

What do you believe about the reality of your experience now? Experience was definitely real. I have read about this in many publications and especially the descriptions by children seem real.

At any time in your life, has anything ever reproduced any part of the experience? No

Is there anything else that you would like to add about your experience? It is confusing because at the time, I was definitely a 'Jesus Freak' and had read the Bible at least seven times from cover to cover. I had taken classes on Biblical history, Bible study. I had discussed religion with Jews, Muslims and people of other religions (including atheists). However, no special religious person came to me (I would have expected Jesus) nor did I see anything like 'Heaven' or angels or a white light or a tunnel going into the light, as so many people now report. Nor did I see anything hellish.