Thanks you for this opportunity. I cannot prove anything, but this is the truth. My mother was a religious zealot. I felt responsible for her illness after my twin sister's birth and me. She had tumors in her uterus, hemorrhaged, had experimental radiation, and was never well. After a rape at knife point and believing as I was taught that I lost my soul after losing my virginity I wanted to die. After my boyfriend was drafted, I had tried to get help, was misdiagnosed schizophrenic, sent to live in the basement of a nursing home, and was a zombie on heavy doses of medicine, which I was allergic to. I escaped but got drunk with friends and took the pills I had saved. I was taken to a clinic and passed out. Years later, I retrieved my experience under hypnosis.I was taken to an ethereal conference room filled with Angels, Light Beings, and Masters. The oval conference table was empty. Then a white piece of paper floated down. It was empty until letters began to appear one by one on the paper with spaces in between spelling T-R-U-T-H. I was escorted back to my body. The angels said they would protect me and asked that I tell the truth. I had no idea what truth to tell or what or who they would protect me from. I went on a spiritual journey to find new beliefs after leaving Catholicism. I was obsessed with writing. Shortly after, I dated an older man and became pregnant. I had a miscarriage and he murdered another girl on the playground where we had often made love. I had survival guilt again. I married an ex-convict, had a child and when I left him he tried to kill me for many years. He tried poison, arson, fire, and shooting.Afterwards I was obsessed with writing. I was protected through all of this. I was interested in healing after having energy work. I met someone, took her class, and joined her healing group. We were born at the same hospital on the same day, of the same year an hour apart and met forty years later. We are both authors and healers. I am a survivor of breast cancer after three years. A butterfly landed on my tumor before surgery and stayed there for an unearthly amount of time and I knew I still could not get out. My story is different in that I am not enlightened. I still get down. I am no guru and I did not want to be here. I am afraid now because my wonderful husband is a cancer survivor and I don't want to be without him. I have been obsessed with telling my story to give hope. I have prayed my story reaches those it will heal. I was not punished for suicide. Thank you. Love, Diana M
Date NDE Occurred: 1967
At the time of your experience, was there an associated life-threatening event? Yes Suicide attempt 'Was unconscious for days, I believe I died but cannot prove.' 'Life threatening event, but not clinical death' 'Was unconscious for days, I believe I died but cannot prove.'
How do you consider the content of your experience? Entirely pleasant
The experience included: Out of body experience
Did you feel separated from your body? Uncertain
I clearly left my body and existed outside it
How did your highest level of consciousness and alertness during the experience compare to your normal everyday consciousness and alertness? More consciousness and alertness than normal I was One with God. No pain, no fear.
At what time during the experience were you at your highest level of consciousness and alertness? In the room.
Were your thoughts speeded up? Incredibly fast
Did time seem to speed up or slow down? Everything seemed to be happening at once; or time stopped or lost all meaning
Were your senses more vivid than usual? Incredibly more vivid
Please compare your vision during the experience to your everyday vision that you had immediately prior to the time of the experience. I was able to feel color.
Please compare your hearing during the experience to your everyday hearing that you had immediately prior to the time of the experience. I heard angel's thoughts. I did not hear with ears.
Did you seem to be aware of things going on elsewhere? No
Did you pass into or through a tunnel? Uncertain
Did you see any beings in your experience? I actually saw them
Did you encounter or become aware of any deceased (or alive) beings? Yes
Did you see, or feel surrounded by, a brilliant light? A light clearly of mystical or other-worldly origin
Did you see an unearthly light? Yes
The experience included: A landscape or city
Did you seem to enter some other, unearthly world? A clearly mystical or unearthly realm I was in an ethereal conference room with a table. No walls but it felt enclosed.
What emotions did you feel during the experience? Joy. Love. I felt whole and full of God.
Did you have a feeling of peace or pleasantness? Incredible peace or pleasantness
Did you have a feeling of joy? incredible joy
Did you feel a sense of harmony or unity with the universe? I felt united or one with the world
The experience included: Special knowledge or purpose
Did you suddenly seem to understand everything? Everything about the universe I knew. No doubt, no haze.
Did scenes from your past come back to you? No
Did scenes from the future come to you? No
Did you come to a border or point of no return? I came to a barrier that I was not permitted to cross; or was sent back against my will Angels felt like ordering me to get back down there. They said they would protect me and asked I tell the truth. They did protect me. I did tell the truth.
God, Spiritual and Religion:
What importance did you place on your religious/spiritual life prior to your experience? Greatly important to me
What was your religion prior to your experience? Christian- Catholic Had extreme religious abuse with a mother who was a religious zealot.
After rape was taught better to die than lose virginity. Became suicidal.
Have your religious practices changed since your experience? Yes I don't like intolerant religions or too much ritual.
I like Native American beliefs that include healing.
What importance do you place on your religious/spiritual life after your experience? Greatly important to me
What is your religion now? Other faiths- New age I believe it doesn't matter but prefer churches that believe in healing, i.e., Unity, Lively Stones Fellowship, etc.
Did your experience include features consistent with your earthly beliefs? Content that was both consistent and not consistent with the beliefs you had at the time of your experience I let go of the Catholic beliefs that "I am my Body and my body is dirty" and the guilt about being sexual and the constant self-hate of being a Sinner and fear of sin. No punishment for wanting to be with God.
I believed in healing, oneness, Unity and equality, not "I am saved, You're not".
Did you have a change in your values and beliefs because of your experience? Yes I got rid of the guilt from my religious past and wanted to share the freedom of that.
The experience included: Presence of unearthly beings
Did you seem to encounter a mystical being or presence, or hear an unidentifiable voice? I encountered a definite being, or a voice clearly of mystical or unearthly origin Angels, and masters at the table.
Did you see deceased or religious spirits? I actually saw them
Did you encounter or become aware of any beings who previously lived on earth who are described by name in religions (for example: Jesus, Muhammad, Buddha, etc.)? Uncertain
During your experience, did you gain information about premortal existence? No
During your experience, did you gain information about universal connection or oneness? Yes Exists. We all KNOW this in our souls.
Did you believe in the existence of God prior to your experience? God definitely exists
During your experience, did you gain information about the existence of God? Yes Had to Be. I was alive in Spirit, not my body.
Do you believe in the existence of God after your experience? God definitely exists
Concerning our Earthly lives other than Religion:
During your experience, did you gain special knowledge or information about your purpose? Yes I had to go back, even though I had killed myself. I have felt trapped but feel if I just live until I die, I'll have done it. No need to be famous.
Did you believe that our earthly lives are meaningful and significant prior to your experience? Are not meaningful and significant
During your experience, did you gain information about the meaning of life? Yes For me to tell the truth. Angels are real. Love is real. Healing energy is real and available to everyone. It is what made me feel close to God again, doing healing work.
Did you believe in an afterlife prior to your experience? An afterlife definitely exists
Do you believe in an afterlife after your experience? An afterlife definitely exists Yes I felt unending, eternal.
Did you fear death prior to your experience? I did not fear death
Do you fear death after your experience? I do not fear death
Were you fearful living your life prior to your experience? Greatly fearful in living my earthly life
Were you fearful living your life after your experience? Slightly fearful in living my earthly life
Did you believe that our earthly lives are meaningful and significant after your experience? Are meaningful and significant
Did you gain information about how to live our lives? No
During your experience, did you gain information about life's difficulties, challenges and hardships? Yes I had some kind of promise to return but did not want to. Life on Earth hurts and is blind. "Man tries to measure the ocean of knowledge with the cup of his mind."
Were you compassionate prior to your experience? Moderately compassionate toward others
During your experience, did you gain information about love? Yes Love beyond human.
Were you compassionate after your experience? Greatly compassionate toward others
What life changes occurred in your life after your experience? Large changes in my life I was given a mentor, a wonderful husband, and a child. I was guided to healing and became a healer. Angels protected me from death many times and I survived cancer without doing radiation, drugs or chemo, just surgery against the doctor's will.
Have your relationships changed specifically because of your experience? Yes Yes I've been guided to teachers, healers, mentors, a husband, and having a child.
After the NDE:
Was the experience difficult to express in words? Yes
How accurately do you remember the experience in comparison to other life events that occurred around the time of the experience? I do not know how my remembrance of the experience compares to my remembrance of other life events at time
Do you have any psychic, non-ordinary or other special gifts after your experience that you did not have before the experience? Yes Healing.
Are there one or several parts of your experience that are especially meaningful or significant to you? Yes, angels are real. Healing is real and anyone, especially mothers, can learn to do it and change everything.
Did you have any knowledge of near death experience (NDE) prior to your experience? No I was a teenager and it was not talked about then.
What did you believe about the reality of your experience shortly (days to weeks) after it happened? Experience was probably not real Only after the hypnosis did I understand why I had lived the way I had.
I felt more gratitude.
What do you believe about the reality of your experience now? Experience was probably real
At any time in your life, has anything ever reproduced any part of the experience? Yes When a butterfly landed on my tumor out in the garden before breast lumpectomy. I felt like I was lifted into another world.
Is there anything else that you would like to add about your experience? It was my life and I want to share it before I die.
©1998-2018 NDERF, Jody Long & Jeffrey Long, MD. All Rights Reserved.