I was undergoing surgery to correct a series of SVTs I was having (Super Ventricular Tachycardia a form of severe abnormal heart rhythms). During the procedure they routinely shock, stop, and restart your heart. They don't give you normal anesthesia as it interferes with the heart rhythms. So during the six hours that I was in the procedure I was on some sort of mild sedative that would put me out at times. Unfortunately the drugs never complete knock you out, and you drift in out of consciousness many, many times during the operation. At one point I remember coming to and begging for water with the nurse, trying to suppress panic. I don't think my throat could ever have been that dry, I literally didn't think I could breath. They test your heart, trying to stress it by putting you under twelve inch blankets, heated blankets. Then when you are under these blankets, they give you a shot of heart stimulant, some type of adrenaline I think. I remember the doctor telling me afterwards that they had gotten my heart beat up 250 beats per minute! That is such a high number when I look back and recall that the best I could do on a full cardiac stress test on a treadmill at high incline was 190 beats a minute. They would also shock my heart viciously at times via these catheters they had put in the arteries in my neck and groin area. They burned my heart in a small area about the size of a quarter thirty-two times, then they would shock and crank up my heart to test me - the idea is that they try to burn out the abnormal muscle pathways on the surface of your heart that lead to the abnormal rhythms. I think it was towards the end of the operation that is all happened.
I remember coming to and hearing some sort of conversation in the background, but I'll never be certain what they were saying, I was under the blankets again burning up, parched beyond words, with my heart just jumping out of my chest because they had given it drugs to speed up. I heard someone in the control room yell to the nurse and tell them to give me a shot to slow it back down to normal. Then it just stopped beating, I don't remember much in this world after that. I heard someone shout, and then blackness total darkness.
I wasn't even aware of it at first, but then I could feel the loneliness the isolation and the cold of the darkness. I don't know how long that lasted because time just didn't seem to matter. But then I felt warm and felt a light, not saw one - it just grew brighter and more intense filling every bit of my being. It was very bright, crisp white, and it spoke to me, but not with words. The light ran through me, it was me, and when it spoke it was as if you understood the light not the words. You could feel it to, not like you feel bright hot sun, but you could just feel the light. I don't know how long it all lasted, but then it parted. I remember being pushed back to the darkness and then being the cold for a while.
Then all of sudden I was aware of huge shocks that were going through my body as they shocked me on the table with these huge pads they had attached to my back during the surgery preparation to restart my heart if it failed. I think I tried to look over and say something to the nurse and that is all I remember. They pumped me full of some more drugs. I remember waking in the hospital with a sense of purpose, knowing what I was going to do. The light has infused me with a vision of what it wanted me to communicate with others; I spent the next year writing a book called 'The Ithon'. Sometimes I can't believe what I wrote, other times it scares me. The longer I stay in the world and the farther the light seems the more scared I am of what the light has given me to do in the world.
Date NDE Occurred: July 25th, 2000
At the time of your experience, was there an associated life-threatening event? Yes Surgery-related Clinical death (cessation of breathing or heart function or brain function) I was under going surgery to correct a series of SVTs I was having Super Ventricular Tachycardia a form of severe abnormal heart rhythms.
How do you consider the content of your experience? Mixed
The experience included: Out of body experience
Did you feel separated from your body? Yes I lost awareness of my body
How did your highest level of consciousness and alertness during the experience compare to your normal everyday consciousness and alertness? More consciousness and alertness than normal A feeling of peace with understanding of what I was to do transcended my whole body.
At what time during the experience were you at your highest level of consciousness and alertness? It was dark for a very long time, and then I came to a light and a feeling of calm. From there I heard the voices.
Were your thoughts speeded up? Incredibly fast
Did time seem to speed up or slow down? Everything seemed to be happening at once; or time stopped or lost all meaning Time seemed to be transcendent.
Were your senses more vivid than usual? Incredibly more vivid
Did your vision differ in any way from normal? I could feel the light, not just see it.
Did your hearing differ in any way from normal? It was as if the light spoke to me and I heard the light, not the words but the light. I could understand what it was saying.
Did you seem to be aware of things going on elsewhere? Yes, and the facts have been checked out
Did you pass into or through a tunnel? No
Did you see any beings in your experience? I actually saw them
Did you encounter or become aware of any deceased (or alive) beings? Uncertain Just the light, it was more than light. Very hard to describe.
The experience included: Light
Did you see, or feel surrounded by, a brilliant light? A light clearly of mystical or other-worldly origin
Did you see an unearthly light? Yes The light spoke to me, I could feel the light.
Did you seem to enter some other, unearthly world? No
What emotions did you feel during the experience? At first I was lost in the darkness, alone terribly alone, then the light came and I felt calm and peace more than anything.
Did you have a feeling of peace or pleasantness? Incredible peace or pleasantness
Did you have a feeling of joy? incredible joy
Did you feel a sense of harmony or unity with the universe? I felt united or one with the world
Did you suddenly seem to understand everything? Everything about the universe
Did scenes from your past come back to you? My past flashed before me, out of my control
The experience included: Vision of the future
Did scenes from the future come to you? Scenes from the world's future Yes and no, I became aware of the structure of those events, but not the details.
Did you come to a border or point of no return? I came to a barrier that I was not permitted to cross; or was sent back against my will
God, Spiritual and Religion:
What was your religion prior to your experience? Liberal
Have your religious practices changed since your experience? Yes I became an Ithonian.
What is your religion now? Conservative/fundamentalist
Did you have a change in your values and beliefs because of your experience? Yes I became an Ithonian.
Did you seem to encounter a mystical being or presence, or hear an unidentifiable voice? I encountered a definite being, or a voice clearly of mystical or unearthly origin
Did you see deceased or religious spirits? I actually saw them
Concerning our Earthly lives other than Religion:
During your experience, did you gain special knowledge or information about your purpose? Yes I wrote about a book about from what the light illuminated in my mind called 'The Ithon'. At times it scares me what I wrote, but then I think back to the light and I can find peace.
Have your relationships changed specifically because of your experience? Uncertain To some degree for the people directly around me.
After the NDE:
Was the experience difficult to express in words? Uncertain
Do you have any psychic, non-ordinary or other special gifts after your experience that you did not have before the experience? Yes I can write that which I would never have been able to write. When I write it is totally clear as to what shall be.
Are there one or several parts of your experience that are especially meaningful or significant to you? The light fused with my mind just as it is now still fused in a small way. I'd like to go back and visit the light. The longer I am away from it the more distant it seems.
Have you ever shared this experience with others? Yes I think the reaction has been good, but at times I encounter hostility.
Did you have any knowledge of near death experience (NDE) prior to your experience? No
What did you believe about the reality of your experience shortly (days to weeks) after it happened? Experience was definitely real.
What do you believe about the reality of your experience now? Experience was definitely real.
At any time in your life, has anything ever reproduced any part of the experience? No