Experience Description

I was stupid at 16 years old when I bought drugs at a festival. This was my first time taking any drugs. I hadn't drank any alcohol because I was worried that the drugs might have a bad effect if I mixed it with alcohol. I snorted a very small line and then my friends said I might as well snort another small one, as it might not have an effect on me.

As soon as I snorted the second line, I instantly collapsed. I could feel myself going into a dark hole. I was desperately trying to get out of the tent to get my friend's attention because I knew something was instantly wrong. The best way to describe the feeling was that I was fading in and out of consciousness; it felt like fainting. I was then scooped up by one of my close friends who instantly got help. I could see, hear and understand the world around me but I couldn't respond to anyone. I remember my friends slapping me across the face and I couldn't physically respond. Although it hurt, I couldn't say 'ouch' or react. I was totally locked into my body.

Then I saw myself from above. I was floating above the chaos watching myself dead. It was the first thing I thought, 'FU$%, I'm dead. I'm actually dead'. I remember it so clearly. I could see about ten people standing around me trying to get me to respond. I remember freaking out thinking, 'How do I get back to my body? I can't die. I have to get back to my body. I must get back to my body'. Floating above myself, I didn't have a body. I was looking at my body as if I were watching a movie. I felt a strange warmthness behind me when I was floating above my body. It was a really strange feeling but it was a feeling of reassurance. I can't describe it but I always wonder if it was from a spirit or guardian angel behind me. My body looked dead, so lifeless. I just remember being determined to get back into my body because I wasn't willing to let go of it.

All of a sudden, I just came back to life in my body. I was present in my own body and could move and respond. The first thing I did was grab into the soil and for some weird reason all I could say was 'Don't tell the BBC'. It was really strange, but at least I didn't feel trapped any more and I could speak. I was taken to the medical tent for a few hours under strict supervision of the paramedics. Afterwards I went back to the tents where my friends were. I was petrified. I couldn't sleep and was super anxious and frightened of what happened. I didn't tell anyone about my experience that day because I was so scared. I felt like most of them wouldn't have believed me anyway. For the next few nights I was afraid to go to sleep because I didn't think I'd wake up again. When I was falling asleep, I'd get harsh twitches and hear sharp sounds that instantly woke me up again. After a few weeks, I was sleeping normally and I pushed the whole experience to the back of my mind and didn't think about it.

I haven't had an OBE since. I stupidly took more drugs over the next year to cope with the experience and I've never never never had a similar experience. I no longer take recreational drugs as I've grown up. My friend who also took the same drug was absolutely fine and said it gave her a normal reaction.

You may think I'm crazy or maybe it was just the drug that caused that reaction; maybe I didn't have an OBE. For weeks I just thought it was a 'bad trip'. But the more I think about it, the more I realise it wasn't a bad trip and I did nearly die. I've never felt that before. I genuinely saw myself dead on the floor and that really scares me. I don't speak about it much as I'm worried people will think I'm crazy and I can feel myself getting upset/worked up when I talk about the experience too much but I hope this helps your research.

I haven't put my name, address or contact details as I don't want the drug use linked back to me as I'm ashamed of it.

Background Information:

Gender: Female

Date NDE Occurred: 28/07/2013

NDE Elements:

At the time of your experience, was there an associated life-threatening event? No.

The experience included: Out of body experience

Did you feel separated from your body? Yes. I wasn't anything. I was like a spirit without a specific form. I didn't look at my 'spirit body' in the OBE as I was looking down on the chaos. I was just my thoughts without my body. It's so hard to explain, sorry!

At what time during the experience were you at your highest level of consciousness and alertness? In and out. Described above

Did time seem to speed up or slow down? No

Please compare your hearing during the experience to your everyday hearing that you had immediately prior to the time of the experience. No

Did you pass into or through a tunnel? No

Did you encounter or become aware of any deceased (or alive) beings? No

Did you see an unearthly light? Uncertain. There was a warmth behind me. I didn't see it but I felt warmth.

Did you seem to enter some other, unearthly world? A clearly mystical or unearthly realm. My physical body couldn't react to anything like I was locked in. But when I saw myself from above, I could only see. I didn't have any other senses nor did I have a body

The experience included: Strong emotional tone

What emotions did you feel during the experience? Panic, fear, frightful, worried, scared, determination

Did you suddenly seem to understand everything? No

Did scenes from your past come back to you? My past flashed before me, out of my control

Did scenes from the future come to you? No

God, Spiritual and Religion:

Did you have a change in your values and beliefs because of your experience? No

Concerning our Earthly lives other than Religion:

What life changes occurred in your life after your experience? No

After the NDE:

Was the experience difficult to express in words? No

Do you have any psychic, non-ordinary or other special gifts after your experience that you did not have before the experience? Uncertain. I haven't had unusual things happen to me specifically after the experience but I have had paranormal experiences all my life.

Are there one or several parts of your experience that are especially meaningful or significant to you? The worst part was how close I felt to death. The best part was coming back to my body.

Have you ever shared this experience with others? Yes I've told my current boyfriend about it. He thinks I should go and see a therapist about it because it's really affected me. I don't like to talk about it but I feel like I should do. Hence, this is why I'm filling out this form.

At any time in your life, has anything ever reproduced any part of the experience? No

Is there anything else that you would like to add about your experience? I'll never forget it and I wouldn't want to experience it ever again.

Are there any other questions that we could ask to help you communicate your experience? Nope, you've got it perfect for my experience. I hope it helps!