Tammie S Probable NDE

Experience Description

I remember making them let me kiss my son before they took him away. I remember cussing a lot and saying, “Don’t let me die.”

Then everything became quiet and peaceful. I felt as though I was watching what was happening. I was telling someone that it still was not my time. I was angry and yelling at them. I was cussing and begging them to figure it out.

Then I was back. I could hear them talking and joking. One of the women said she needed to change her clothes because she was covered in my blood. She did not want to frighten my husband when she went to speak with him. She joked that there was nothing she could do about her ruined shoes and hoped he would not notice them.

I was especially angry because my daughter had previously dreamed that I died in childbirth. Everyone knew about the dream, so I had been watched very closely. Even with all that attention, I still nearly died giving birth.

My husband remains traumatized by what happened. Later, I watched as Roe v. Wade was overturned. It disturbed me to see procedures that can save a mother’s life come under greater scrutiny. I worry about doctors hesitating when they need to act quickly to save a mother.

This was my second experience. Later, I also had an experience involving an angel when my mother was dying.

Background Information:

Gender: Female

Date of NDE: 12/04/2014

NDE Elements:

At the time of your experience, was there an associated life-threatening event? Yes
I had just delivered my son and didn't stop bleeding. I was already in the surgery room and signed for a D&C and a full hysterectomy as they were pushing my husband and son out of the room.

How do you consider the content of your experience? Neither pleasant NOR distressing

Did you feel separated from your body? I clearly left my body and existed outside it

How did your highest level of consciousness and alertness during the experience compare to your normal everyday consciousness and alertness? I was watching the doctor's work and just felt like I was holding my breath.
I knew what was happening before I kissed my baby and sent them from the room. That part was slow motion, then it stopped while I was watching, then back to normal or fast after I heard that she needed to change.

At what time during the experience were you at your highest level of consciousness? More consciousness and alertness than normal

Were your thoughts speeded up? No

Did time seem to speed up or slow down? Time seemed to go faster or slower than usual
During the surgery, I felt time for me stopped, and I held my breath while they tried to save me.

Were your senses more vivid than usual? Incredibly more vivid

Please compare your vision during the experience to your everyday vision that you had immediately prior to the time of the experience Everything was incredibly more. I was greatly aware that I was blessed to still be here. I felt in awe of everything.

Please compare your hearing during the experience to your everyday hearing that you had immediately prior to the time of the experience I heard everything they talked about at the beginning and at the end, but in the middle I felt it was quiet, kind of like I was holding my breath.

Did you seem to be aware of things going on elsewhere? No

Did you pass into or through a tunnel? No

Did you see any beings in your experience? I sensed their presence

Did you encounter or become aware of any deceased beings? Yes
I had a prior life-flashing event, so this time was just no, it's not my time, and I was mad because we warned them.

Did you see or feel surrounded by a brilliant light? No

Did you see an unearthly light? Uncertain
It felt cloudy, like blurred on the edges.

Did you seem to enter another world? No

What emotions did you feel during the experience? I was mad because my daughter was given the warning, and still here I was. I was scared, but in the middle I felt a calm when I was holding my breath, waiting for them to figure out the cause of the bleeding.

Did you have a feeling of peace or pleasantness? Relief or calmness

Did you have a feeling of joy? No

Did you feel a sense of harmony or unity with the universe? No

Did you suddenly understand everything? Everything about myself or others
I had a renewed sense of appreciation, and I was begging to be alive.

Did scenes from your past come back? No

Did scenes from the future come? I could see myself with my family, and I didn't understand why I was even at risk. It's absolutely ridiculous that a first-world country kills as many women as we do in childbirth.

Did you reach a boundary or limiting physical structure? No

Did you come to a border or point of no return? I came to a definite conscious decision to return to life
I was mad that I wasn't supposed to be there, and I needed to raise my babies. My daughter wouldn't have survived losing me, especially after she dreamed it.

God, Spiritual and Religion:

What was your religion prior to your experience? Other or several faiths
I believe in God, just not in organized religion.

Have your religious practices changed? No

What is your religion now? Other or several faiths
Same as before.

Did your experience include features consistent with your earthly beliefs? Content that was entirely consistent with the beliefs you had at the time of your experience
I wasn't given anything to show remorse or repent for. I'm far from perfect, but I strive to do good for myself, my family, and others.

Did you have a change in your values and beliefs because of your experience? Yes
I knew my kids had to come first even before, but this slowed me down to enjoy my last kid.

Did you seem to encounter a mystical being or presence, or hear an unidentifiable voice? I encountered a definite being, or a voice clearly of mystical or unearthly origin
I was yelling at someone, but I felt it was a decision maker or something. Everyone was just watching the doctors. I felt my grandma and my best friend with me, but we all just watched.

Did you encounter or become aware of any beings who previously lived on earth who are described by name in religions (for example: Jesus, Muhammad, Buddha, etc.)? Uncertain
The decision maker was possibly a higher power or God.

During your experience, did you gain information about premortal existence? Uncertain
I didn't pick up anything like that.

During your experience, did you gain information about universal connection or oneness? Yes
I've been trying since the first time to make sure everything is not just for selfish reasons. I'm meant to do something good, and I've been sent back twice now. I have to be a mom first, or maybe my good is just being a mom. I don't know, but I was sent back or allowed back to continue doing good.

During your experience, did you gain information about the existence of God? Yes
I felt I was bargaining with them. What did I do? I haven't hurt anyone. I have treated everyone kindly. Why is this happening?

Concerning our Earthly lives other than Religion:

During your experience, did you gain special knowledge or information about your purpose? Uncertain
I had a sense that I wasn't supposed to be here again. I had been careful. We had warned everyone about my daughter's dream, and I was mad they still had me almost dead.

During your experience, did you gain information about the meaning of life? Yes
I think I covered it with the last question. I'm here to do something good.

During your experience, did you gain information about an afterlife? Yes
I felt my grandma and my best friend with me.

Did you gain information about how to live our lives? Yes
I'm going to redo the questions for my first experience so I can explain better.

During your experience, did you gain information about life's difficulties, challenges and hardships? No

During your experience, did you gain information about love? No

What life changes occurred in your life after your experience? Slight changes in my life
I believe everything happens for a reason. I've always believed that. I was mad about this experience because the doctors were warned and should have been better prepared for complications. My life was unnecessarily put in jeopardy that day.

Have your relationships changed specifically because of your experience? Yes
My husband treated my son and me differently this time after almost losing us.

After the NDE:

Was the experience difficult to express in words? Yes
I felt like I was watching everything for a while after, like I wasn't really there, but I was.

How accurately do you remember the experience in comparison to other life events that occurred around the time of the experience? I remember the experience more accurately than other life events that occurred around the time of the experience
I slept for days, even weeks, afterward because I was so tired. I had almost all of my life fluid drained, and the blood blew through almost every vein in my body going back in. I remembered very clearly swearing, and the doctor talking about her clothes. This is the first time I've written anything down.

Do you have any psychic, non-ordinary or other special gifts after your experience that you did not have before the experience? Uncertain
I get messages now telling me to do things. I get on my phone, see a post, and hear a silent prayer. If I can help, we do. We have been blessed and feel compelled to pass that on, even more so now.

Are there one or several parts of your experience that are especially meaningful or significant to you? I've always felt I was meant for a greater purpose, so to have survived twice now, I felt like I need to help others. Then something happened, and I had to slow down and care for myself for a while first.

Have you ever shared this experience with others? Yes
I have used it to help support women during the Roe v. Wade overturn. We live in Missouri, and they had a trigger law waiting for it. I used my experience to convince women we had to protect ourselves and vote to protect women. Missouri passed with 80% to protect our abortion rights because it's not abortion, it's about healthcare. I worked with Planned Parenthood and Supermajority and made calls and sent texts in several states.

Did you have any knowledge of near death experience (NDE) prior to your experience? Yes
I had a prior experience.

What did you believe about the reality of your experience shortly (days to weeks) after it happened? Experience was definitely real
I'm here for a reason.

What do you believe about the reality of your experience now? Experience was definitely real
I survived, and her shoes were ruined. She confirmed that part of the conversation the next day.

At any time in your life, has anything ever reproduced any part of the experience? No

Did the questions asked and information that you provided accurately and comprehensively describe your experience? Yes
I should have done the first one first.

Anything else to add? I didn't know that you guys existed. I have a minor in gerontology and studied death during COVID.