Sandra V NDE

Experience Description

I was in the preoperative area at Orlando Cancer Hospital, being prepared for surgery. The nurse explained that their usual procedure was to inject a small drop of Lidocaine under the skin of the arm before inserting an IV. Although my medical records clearly indicated a suspected sensitivity to Lidocaine, the nurse believed that such a small amount would not cause a problem. Within seconds of the injection, I felt what seemed like bubbles violently rushing through my veins. I turned to my husband and said, "Something's not right." Seconds later, I was gone.

Instantly, I went from darkness into light, surrounded by a beautiful, luminous glow as I floated weightlessly upward and forward at a comfortable speed. Everything was extraordinarily quiet and peaceful as the light opened into a glorious landscape. I was surrounded by indescribably beautiful flowers in vivid colors, brilliant blue skies, gorgeous butterflies, and bubbling streams. The clarity, colors, and beauty were beyond anything I had ever seen or could possibly describe in words. I continued floating forward and upward as though I were flying, completely immersed in the magnificence surrounding me.

Although I could not see my own body, I felt whole, weightless, serenely calm, and filled with overwhelming joy and gratitude. I do not remember hearing any distinct sounds, but a wonderful, comforting quietness surrounded me and filled me with love and happiness. I knew I was smiling in awe as I continued floating through this extraordinary place, experiencing a joy and serenity beyond anything I had ever known. I wanted the journey to continue forever and remember expressing that desire without speaking. I was communicating my feelings and wishes entirely through my thoughts as I floated along.

After what seemed like only a few moments, I had the distinct feeling that my thoughts had been received by the invisible, loving presence surrounding me. Without warning, I stopped moving forward and upward and was suddenly transported back. I found myself observing a chaotic scene involving frantic doctors and nurses, medical equipment, instruments, and a cart with paddles. People appeared to be shouting commands, but everything was completely silent to me. My surgeon, still wearing his surgical scrubs, stood in the doorway looking visibly distressed, while a priest holding a Bible stood behind him in the hallway. In the opposite corner of the room, a hospital attendant was holding my husband back as the medical team worked around me.

Although I could see the confusion and urgency surrounding me, I could hear absolutely nothing. I felt confused and helpless, and I closed my eyes while desperately begging with my mind to return to the beautiful place I had just left. Within seconds, I felt that same wonderful peace and love again, although this time the brilliant light did not surround me. Suddenly, I experienced an overwhelming sense of urgency telling me to open my eyes. I resisted because I desperately wanted to remain in that peaceful state. Then I heard my husband's voice crying out to me in my thoughts, "Babe, come back to me. Don't leave me!"

When I finally opened my eyes, the noise was deafening. I was lying flat on the bed and turned my head slightly to the right, where I saw a doctor wearing a mask and an attendant standing behind him. People were shouting numbers and medical information all around me, machines were beeping, and instruments and equipment surrounded my body. Although I could not see them from my position, I instinctively knew that my husband was in the far corner of the room, my surgeon was watching from the doorway, and a priest holding a Bible stood behind him in the hallway.

Then I heard my husband rushing toward my left side, exclaiming, "She's back! She's back!"

I apologized to him and told him that I had been begging to return to the beautiful place where I had just been. He looked deeply into my eyes, trying to understand what I was telling him, but his overwhelming joy was unmistakable as he squeezed my hand. He explained that when the emergency code team arrived, he had been rushed to the back corner of the room but had continued calling out to me.

According to my husband, I had been seizing, was unconscious, and my vital signs were rapidly deteriorating, while the medical team struggled to understand what was happening. He kept shouting that I had been given Lidocaine, and eventually the anesthesiologist, who had rushed into the room with the other emergency team members, heard him and responded. My husband said it seemed like an eternity before the medical team finally began to relax and everyone could breathe again.

He was eventually motioned forward while the doctors asked questions, checked and rechecked my vital signs, and evaluated my consciousness and ability to understand what was happening. Once they were satisfied that I was stabilizing, some of the equipment was disconnected and moved away. Throughout this time, I kept asking why my surgeon had looked so frightened while standing in the doorway and whether I could please see him and the priest who had been standing outside. My husband was astonished because he had not even known that my surgeon was standing in the doorway or that a priest had been in the hallway.

After the emergency team cleared the room, my surgeon came inside and spoke with me briefly. When I asked him why he had looked so distressed while watching everything unfold, his expression of surprise was so remarkable that we actually laughed. He explained that he had been called out of the operating room when I coded and that he had stood outside the preoperative room without knowing exactly what was happening. At that point, he had been entirely dependent on the anesthesiologist and the emergency code team working inside the room. He was shocked that I knew he had been standing in the doorway and that a priest had been with him in the hallway.

After I was stabilized, I was transferred to a regular hospital room for observation and was assured that the priest would come to visit me later that day. Several hours later, I was alone in my hospital room when the priest entered. As soon as I saw him, tears began gently flowing down my cheeks. He was the same priest I had seen earlier in the hallway, even though I had never met him before, and he was still holding his Bible. At first, I could not speak, but he seemed to understand my emotions and gently placed his hand on my arm.

Struggling to form words through my tears, I begged him to tell people that they should not be afraid of death.

"It is so beautiful! Tell them! Do not let them be afraid!"

I could barely say anything more without breaking down in tears. The priest calmly assured me that he understood and told me that he had heard those very words more often than I might believe. As I lay there, nearly speechless, he said a simple prayer for me and with me before quietly leaving the room. Afterward, the overwhelming feeling of complete calm and serenity that I had experienced during my journey returned, and I drifted into a deep, peaceful sleep.

Background Information:

Gender: Female

Date of NDE: 04/04/2010

NDE Elements:

At the time of your experience, was there an associated life-threatening event? Yes
I coded after receiving a Lidocaine injection. The Code Blue team worked frantically to bring me back. Cardiac paddles were not deployed.

How do you consider the content of your experience? Entirely pleasant

Did you feel separated from your body? I lost awareness of my body
In the description of my experience, I describe feeling like I went through the experience twice. I did not see or sense anything earthly while floating, but coming back, or on the way back, I visualized what was happening and who was present in and outside my hospital cubicle.

How did your highest level of consciousness and alertness during the experience compare to your normal everyday consciousness and alertness? When I was floating upward and forward. Intensely aware of my surroundings.
Never have I seen so clearly or deeply.

At what time during the experience were you at your highest level of consciousness? More consciousness and alertness than normal

Were your thoughts speeded up? Faster than usual

Did time seem to speed up or slow down? No

Were your senses more vivid than usual? Incredibly more vivid

Please compare your vision during the experience to your everyday vision that you had immediately prior to the time of the experience Prior to the experience, normal vision? Clarity during the experience was hard to describe. Colors were vivid, deep, and intensely beautiful.

Please compare your hearing during the experience to your everyday hearing that you had immediately prior to the time of the experience Everyday hearing was, and is, fine, but even years after my experience, hearing seems obtrusive and chaotic. This became apparent after I experienced the feeling of hearing coming from within rather than from around me.

Did you seem to be aware of things going on elsewhere? No

Did you pass into or through a tunnel? Uncertain
I did not feel like I was enclosed in a tunnel, or 'enclosed' in anything, but rather surrounded by light and beauty while moving in a specific direction.

Did you see any beings in your experience? No

Did you encounter or become aware of any deceased beings? No

Did you see or feel surrounded by a brilliant light? A light clearly of mystical or other-worldly origin

Did you see an unearthly light? Yes
A brightness that was not blinding, but exceptionally warm and beautiful.

Did you seem to enter another world? A clearly mystical or unearthly realm
Too indescribably beautiful to be earthly.

What emotions did you feel during the experience? Overwhelming peace, joy, and love inside, outside, and completely surrounding me.

Did you have a feeling of peace or pleasantness? Incredible peace or pleasantness

Did you have a feeling of joy? Incredible joy

Did you feel a sense of harmony or unity with the universe? I felt united or one with the world

Did you suddenly understand everything? No

Did scenes from your past come back? No

Did you reach a boundary or limiting physical structure? No

Did you come to a border or point of no return? No

God, Spiritual and Religion:

What was your religion prior to your experience? Christian - Catholic
Not practicing Catholic

Have your religious practices changed? Yes
I am devoted to prayer, especially praying prayers of gratitude every day.

What is your religion now? Christian - Catholic
Prayerful Catholic, devoted to daily prayer but do not attend Mass.

Did your experience include features consistent with your earthly beliefs? Content that was both consistent and not consistent with the beliefs you had at the time of your experience
I did not have any conscious knowledge or belief, or misbelief, in any experiences like this.

Did you have a change in your values and beliefs because of your experience? Yes
I value the way we choose to live life more than I did before the experience.

Did you seem to encounter a mystical being or presence, or hear an unidentifiable voice? No

Did you encounter or become aware of any beings who previously lived on earth who are described by name in religions (for example: Jesus, Muhammad, Buddha, etc.)? No

During your experience, did you gain information about premortal existence? No

During your experience, did you gain information about universal connection or oneness? No

During your experience, did you gain information about the existence of God? No

Concerning our Earthly lives other than Religion:

During your experience, did you gain special knowledge or information about your purpose? No

During your experience, did you gain information about the meaning of life? No

During your experience, did you gain information about an afterlife? No

Did you gain information about how to live our lives? No

During your experience, did you gain information about life's difficulties, challenges and hardships? No

During your experience, did you gain information about love? No

What life changes occurred in your life after your experience? Moderate changes in my life
It has taken many years to embrace the experience I went through, but in finding research and books like yours, I am more grateful every day. Life definitely has more meaning to me now than ever before.

Have your relationships changed specifically because of your experience? Yes
Hard to explain, but I am definitely more prone to very subtly encouraging people who have lost their faith or do not believe in an existence after death. I am more comfortable with family members or friends who are elderly or terminally ill.

After the NDE:

Was the experience difficult to express in words? Yes
I have loved writing all my life, and yet words are inadequate to describe the experience.

How accurately do you remember the experience in comparison to other life events that occurred around the time of the experience? I remember the experience more accurately than other life events that occurred around the time of the experience
This experience was more acute in my memory and vision than any other experience in life. I was too afraid to share the experience, and only did so briefly with someone close to me, when I saw a movie years later with a child experiencing many of the exact details I witnessed. I was shaken and sobbing when I unknowingly saw this movie. It took me days to grasp the reality that I was not alone in my experience. I literally had life changing surgery three months after my experience, and yet I do not recall details of that, that year, or any other year like the details of the experience.

Do you have any psychic, non-ordinary or other special gifts after your experience that you did not have before the experience? No

Have you ever shared this experience with others? No

Did you have any knowledge of near death experience (NDE) prior to your experience? No

What did you believe about the reality of your experience shortly (days to weeks) after it happened? Experience was definitely real
I was absolutely certain that what I experienced was real, even though I avoided trying to discuss even brief moments, memories, or clarity of it, knowing it would be incomprehensible to others.

What do you believe about the reality of your experience now? Experience was definitely real
Thanks to your research, books, and documentary style media, I have seen identical visions and heard remarkably similar accounts from complete strangers. These vivid similarities have shaken me to the core emotionally, because they solidify the validity of my NDE when normal life constantly challenges it.

At any time in your life, has anything ever reproduced any part of the experience? Yes
I am not sure I understand the question, but as I have stated, I have definitely seen and heard precise parts of my experience vividly and identically portrayed in accounts from others since this happened to me.

Did the questions asked and information that you provided accurately and comprehensively describe your experience? Yes
I have held my experience 'close to the vest' over the years, but details never changed, and never faded. These questions gave me the ability to share details as accurately as I encountered them. Mere words cannot express it comprehensively enough, but I did my best.

Anything else to add? I have never had the ability to share my experience without fearing disbelief, rejection, or skepticism. The few times I tried over the years, words were lost to emotion. I would like to express my heartfelt gratitude to everyone at NDERF. This site provided me both an emotionally and spiritually healing opportunity.