Randall C NDE

Experience Description

Mishap Background:

My NDE occurred in May 2010, during a deep-sea fishing trip off Vancouver Island, British Columbia, near a small fishing village. On the way back from fishing in the ocean, we stopped to do some clam digging and look for oysters. While digging clams, the boat became unmoored and began drifting into the inlet due to the incoming tide. When my fishing buddy, Stu, and I noticed it, the boat was already about 20 yards from shore. Being 15 years younger than Stu, I was 44 at the time and still serving on active duty in the United States Air Force. I told him I would swim out to the boat to bring it back to shore. I stripped down to my underwear and a t-shirt, then proceeded to swim out to the boat.

I knew the water was cold, but I was in very good physical shape and thought it would be no problem to swim out to the boat and climb on board. However, the water was far colder than I realized, and my energy quickly drained. When I reached the boat, my arms were moving extremely slowly, and I just did not have the strength to pull myself over the side. I also knew there was no way I could swim back to shore; I was just too cold and drained of all energy. As I was clinging to the side of the boat, I accepted that I was going to die from drowning. Even though my brain was telling my fingers to hold on, I could not. I slowly watched my fingers slide off the side of the boat, and I slipped beneath the water.

I took a deep breath of air before fully submerging and held my breath for as long as I could. Under the water, approximately five feet down, it was extremely silent and peaceful. I was floating along with the current, eyes open, watching seaweed floating around me. During this time, I thought to myself that I was going to become crab food. This seemed funny to me at the time because Stu and I had frequently joked about someday becoming crab food if we fell overboard. How I could be thinking of something funny at this time still seems odd to me. Besides thinking I was going to end up as crab food, I thought of my wife and two boys, and how I would not be there to take care of them. I had held my breath for what seemed like minutes. Finally, it felt like my lungs were going to burst and the next breath I tried to take would be my last.

Blackness and the Light

I could not hold my breath any longer and was just beginning to open my mouth to inhale saltwater when a jolt, best described as lightning, struck me. It was during this split second between deciding to take a breath and beginning to open my mouth that I had my near-death experience. Everything became black around me. The blackness was absolute, seeming to last for a few minutes. In this blackness, I was aware that my consciousness or soul was still intact, as I could still form thoughts and realize what was going on around me. I then noticed a light, far off in the distance. I did not feel as if I was moving, but as if the light was enveloping me. This light was brighter than anything I had ever seen, brighter even than the sun. However, I could look at it without difficulty. As the light enveloped me, the overwhelming love that embraced me is indescribable. It was the type of love that simply loved you for who you were. There was no judgment, no guilt, just overwhelming love like no other.

The Life Review

No words had been uttered as I was enveloped by the light. There was a presence, but I could not see anyone; I only felt there was someone there guiding me. Then, I am looking at a pure white wall when what seems like thousands of camera light bulbs start flashing in front of me. In retrospect, the best example I can use is it looked like what used to happen during Super Bowl kick-offs back in the 1980s, when thousands of camera light bulbs would be going off all at once. In each of these flashes was a view of my life from before birth to the point I was now at. The first flash, I am still in my mother’s womb as a fetus. The next, I am approximately two years old. I could only keep this memory of whatever happened at two years old for a few days. I wish I had written everything down the day after it happened, but in 2010, I had not really researched NDEs or knew much about the idea.

The Cosmos

When the life review ended, I was then instantaneously in the vastness of the cosmos, communicating with the Creator. Not speaking verbally, but with thought, telepathically. No sooner would I ask a question than the answer would form immediately in my consciousness. One thing I absolutely remember is having a 360-degree view of all the universes around me. Even though this is hard to imagine, it felt very normal to me, and I had no problem adjusting to it. During my NDE, the overwhelming and pervasive feeling of love was ever present. I had no fear, just joy at finally being home. While in the cosmos is when I understood that absolutely everything is connected. Every grain of sand, the forest trees, the smallest insect, to every human being, everything is connected. Everything was created for a purpose and is the way the Creator intended it to be. I know that God is an earthly word, but the word God does not do him justice due to the divine, overpowering, encompassing love and power of creation he possesses.

The Creator’s voice I heard telepathically in the cosmos was deep and warm. There were no commanding tones, just a sincere two-way form of communication. Unfortunately, I do not remember anything I asked or any answer I received. It was during my time in the cosmos that I realized for the first time that I had no feeling of pain or emotional suffering. Having endured 11 surgeries from neck fusion to low back laminectomy and everything in between, I know what physical pain feels like. I served in the active-duty United States Air Force for 20 and a half years as an aircrew member on C-141s and C-17s, flying just over 1,500 combat hours. I was involved in combat missions over Kosovo, Afghanistan, and Iraq. While being a member of the aircrew flying these combat missions, we were under enemy fire numerous times. The aircraft came under attack from small arms fire, anti-aircraft artillery, and surface-to-air missiles on different missions. Another stressful event was performing human remains repatriation flights out of combat zones. I was later diagnosed with severe PTSD after I retired from service. To be relieved of all the physical pain I suffer from daily and the emotional memories of my life is a condition I can barely wait to experience again.

The Garden

I am then being escorted by a being that I realize must be Jesus into a beautiful European-style castle garden. The flowers, trees, and grassy areas are picturesque. The colors are vibrant and awe-inspiring, like no colors seen on earth. There are pure white marble benches, marble columns, and marble pergolas with people materializing around them. First, there are only a few people that appear, then increasingly more materialize to the point where there are at least 200 people present. Some are prior deceased relatives, others were good friends, others I did not recognize. All are welcoming, but I hear no thoughts from them. It is at this time that I realize I have no grief for lost loved ones still alive on earth, as I know that I will be with them all again in the afterlife. The feeling of finally being home is so joyous. I want to stay so badly and communicate with everybody but somehow realize that I am going to be going back.

The Lightning Jolt

Realizing I am going back, a blinding light flashes and I am back in my body as a jolt of lightning propels my body upwards towards the surface. Please understand that from the time my fingers slowly unclenched from the side of the boat to when I exploded to the surface, my limbs were totally useless as I could not move them due to the cold temperature of the water paralyzing me. Somehow, I was able to swim a few strokes to the boat as it had been drifting alongside me during the incoming tide. I could hear Stu on the beach yelling at me, but there was nothing I could do.

I decided to head towards the bow of the boat where the rope is floating on the water. I still believe I am going to drown because I was so cold and I have no strength to climb onto the boat. I think to myself that I will wrap the rope around my arm so my family will at least have my body to bury. At this time, I hear Stu yelling on the beach that I am close to shore. I knew it was still very deep where I was, but I put my right foot down and touched something hard. I pushed off this with whatever strength I had left in my body. I got within five feet from shore when I was finally able to touch bottom again.

I struggle to shore, coughing and spitting, while peeling off what clothes I still have on, underwear and a t-shirt. Thankfully Stu and I always packed a change of clothes in case of getting wet. I pulled my sweats on, grabbed all the life preservers and blankets I could find, and curled up in the fetal position in the bow of the boat. Back at the dock, not much was said as we were just trying to get back to the condo so I could take a hot shower.

The next morning, I said to Stu that if I don’t go back out on the ocean today to get over my fear, I will never go back out again. We left the dock, but on the way out, I told Stu that I needed to know what I had pushed off on with my right foot. Back at the exact location from yesterday, we found the depth was 20 feet. We had a tri-scan fishing sonar, and something pinged about 15 feet from shore. Sticking straight up, about five feet below the surface, was a column rock formation. This vertical rock column was about the diameter of a pie plate. It was the only thing to ping the sonar in a 50-foot radius. I absolutely believe it was divine intervention that saved me from drowning the day before. The time it took for what occurred after I entered the blackness to when I was struck with a jolt of lightning was likely only a split second here on earth, but where I was, it seemed I was there for several hours.

Life Changes

Results of my NDE have caused me to be a much more compassionate person, where I not only care about what someone thinks of me, but I now care about how I make someone else feel. Having not been much of a religious person during my life, I still believed in God and Jesus; I just didn’t believe that I had to go to a man-made building to worship them. Since my NDE, I have become a much more spiritual person and feel much closer to God while being surrounded by nature. I believe that the reason I was sent back is because I was still meant to do more good here on earth. I was sent back to take care of my wife and to help fellow service members as they battle through their personal injuries and PTSD mental conditions. I currently serve as Vice-Commander for an American Legion Post. Having several post-graduate degrees, I have used my talent for research by writing and receiving numerous grants to help establish a Veterans Outreach Center. This facility provides help with Veterans Administration paperwork to assist veterans in applying for benefits they have earned. We also supply two hot meals per week for all veterans to attend, plus a food bank has been established along with clothing assistance for those in need. I am now not afraid of death and actually look forward to it. Knowing the unconditional love and pain-free place I was is where home really is.

Background Information:

Gender: Male

Date of NDE: 05/00/2010

NDE Elements:

At the time of your experience, was there an associated life-threatening event? Yes
Drowning

How do you consider the content of your experience? Entirely pleasant

Did you feel separated from your body? I clearly left my body and existed outside it

How did your highest level of consciousness and alertness during the experience compare to your normal everyday consciousness and alertness? As soon as I entered the darkness.
360-degree vision, telepathic communication, vibrant unearthly colors

At what time during the experience were you at your highest level of consciousness? More consciousness and alertness than normal

Were your thoughts speeded up? No

Did time seem to speed up or slow down? Everything seemed to be happening at once; or time stopped or lost all meaning
What happened between the darkness and exploding out of the water from a jolt of lightning likely took a split second in earthly time, but it seemed like I spent several hours wherever I was.

Were your senses more vivid than usual? Incredibly more vivid

Please compare your vision during the experience to your everyday vision that you had immediately prior to the time of the experience There is no comparison between how we see on Earth and where I was.

Please compare your hearing during the experience to your everyday hearing that you had immediately prior to the time of the experience There was no hearing; anything I heard was telepathically communicated to me instantly.

Did you seem to be aware of things going on elsewhere? No

Did you pass into or through a tunnel? Uncertain
I was in a blackness, then saw a light in the distance that seemed to envelop me.

Did you see any beings in your experience? I actually saw them

Did you encounter or become aware of any deceased beings? Yes
I saw deceased relatives, friends, and others I did not recognize.

Did you see or feel surrounded by a brilliant light? An unusually bright light

Did you see an unearthly light? Yes
A light brighter than the sun, but one that I could still look at.

Did you seem to enter another world? A clearly mystical or unearthly realm
The colors were indescribable, vibrant and like no colors I had ever seen before.

What emotions did you feel during the experience? The most intense form of love ever imagined.

Did you have a feeling of peace or pleasantness? Incredible peace or pleasantness

Did you have a feeling of joy? Incredible joy

Did you feel a sense of harmony or unity with the universe? I felt united or one with the world

Did you suddenly understand everything? Everything about the universe
Everything is connected.

Did scenes from your past come back? My past flashed before me, out of my control
I had a life review that looked like camera flashbulbs flashing, with each one containing a different view from before birth to the point of my potential drowning. I saw deceased family members, friends, and others I did not recognize.

Did you reach a boundary or limiting physical structure? No

Did you come to a border or point of no return? I came to a barrier that I was not permitted to cross; or was sent back against my will
I wanted very badly to stay, but I became under the impression that there was still good on earth that I was meant to do.

God, Spiritual and Religion:

What was your religion prior to your experience? Christian - Other Christian
Did not attend church but believed in God and Jesus.

Have your religious practices changed? Yes
Now I am highly spiritual and feel at peace in nature.

What is your religion now? Christian - Other Christian
Highly spiritual, as everything is connected.

Did your experience include features consistent with your earthly beliefs? Content that was entirely consistent with the beliefs you had at the time of your experience
I believed in God and Jesus before the event. Knowing that everything is connected only reinforced my belief in spiritualism and nature.

Did you have a change in your values and beliefs because of your experience? Yes
There is now no doubt in my mind as to what occurs after death on earth.

Did you seem to encounter a mystical being or presence, or hear an unidentifiable voice? I encountered a definite being, or a voice clearly of mystical or unearthly origin
A deep, comforting man's voice when I was floating in the cosmos.

Did you encounter or become aware of any beings who previously lived on earth who are described by name in religions (for example: Jesus, Muhammad, Buddha, etc.)? Yes
Jesus escorted me to the garden.

During your experience, did you gain information about premortal existence? Yes
I had 360 degree vision and communicated telepathically.

During your experience, did you gain information about universal connection or oneness? Yes
There is now no doubt in my mind that everything is connected.

During your experience, did you gain information about the existence of God? Yes
God is an earthly word that does not do the Creator justice due to the overwhelming feeling of love and the power of creation he possesses.

Concerning our Earthly lives other than Religion:

During your experience, did you gain special knowledge or information about your purpose? Yes
The reason I was sent back is to do more good here on earth.

During your experience, did you gain information about the meaning of life? No

During your experience, did you gain information about an afterlife? Yes
There is absolutely continued existence as my consciousness or soul continued on throughout my experience.

Did you gain information about how to live our lives? No

During your experience, did you gain information about life's difficulties, challenges and hardships? No

During your experience, did you gain information about love? Yes
Earthly words cannot adequately describe the intense and overwhelming feeling of love I felt, and I did not want to leave it.

What life changes occurred in your life after your experience? Large changes in my life
Much more compassionate than before my experience.

Have your relationships changed specifically because of your experience? Yes
I am more empathic to others, better able to understand their pain and want to help them.

After the NDE:

Was the experience difficult to express in words? Yes
There are no earthly words to fully describe the overwhelming sense of love, the intense and vibrant colors, or being in the presence of the Creator.

How accurately do you remember the experience in comparison to other life events that occurred around the time of the experience? I remember the experience more accurately than other life events that occurred around the time of the experience
I can remember everything that happened to me as if it were yesterday.

Do you have any psychic, non-ordinary or other special gifts after your experience that you did not have before the experience? No

Are there one or several parts of your experience that are especially meaningful or significant to you? The pain-free state I was in was meaningful because I believe that since I had no body, only consciousness or a soul, there were no body parts to cause pain.

Have you ever shared this experience with others? Yes
I shared it with my best friend, who is an atheist, a few days later. His reaction was really disappointing to me, as I don't think he took it as seriously as it meant to me.

Did you have any knowledge of near death experience (NDE) prior to your experience? No

What did you believe about the reality of your experience shortly (days to weeks) after it happened? Experience was definitely real
The feeling of love was so intense, and the realization that I was never going to encounter that type of unconditional love on Earth caused depression for several weeks after the experience.

What do you believe about the reality of your experience now? Experience was definitely real
The experience was intense, with abilities such as 360-degree vision, being absolutely pain-free, and vibrant colors that were almost shimmering.

At any time in your life, has anything ever reproduced any part of the experience? No

Did the questions asked and information that you provided accurately and comprehensively describe your experience? Yes
Even though my NDE occurred 16 years ago, while writing my narrative, I could remember everything as if it had just happened yesterday. Intense memories stay with a person forever, while some are buried due to not wanting to remember abuse or other intensely hurtful situations. I talk about mine with anyone who will listen because I fully believe that what happened to me is more real than my existence on Earth.

Anything else to add? Only that wherever I was, I cannot wait to return.