Raleigh Probable NDE

Experience Description

Prior to the experience, my grandmother appeared to be beating a dog to death. I intervened and yelled at her to stop. She rushed at me, grabbed me by the neck, and we tripped over a dog gate in the process. I lost consciousness when my head hit the carpeted, concrete floor.

Background Information:

Gender: Male

Date of NDE: 1990s

NDE Elements:

At the time of your experience, was there an associated life-threatening event? Yes
My grandmother tackled me to the ground while strangling me. I lost consciousness when my head hit the floor, which was carpet on top of concrete.

How do you consider the content of your experience? Both pleasant AND distressing

Did you feel separated from your body? I clearly left my body and existed outside it

How did your highest level of consciousness and alertness during the experience compare to your normal everyday consciousness and alertness? Toward the beginning.
I felt no connection to a body of any sort

At what time during the experience were you at your highest level of consciousness? Less consciousness and alertness than normal

Were your thoughts speeded up? No

Did time seem to speed up or slow down? Everything seemed to be happening at once; or time stopped or lost all meaning
Time was meaningless, but I felt things.

Were your senses more vivid than usual? No

Please compare your vision during the experience to your everyday vision that you had immediately prior to the time of the experience I felt like I was formless, except for a mind. Everything was black, but not like looking at the backs of your eyelids in the pitch black dark. It was like light had never been there. There was no ambient light of any kind.

Please compare your hearing during the experience to your everyday hearing that you had immediately prior to the time of the experience There was no sound.

Did you seem to be aware of things going on elsewhere? No

Did you pass into or through a tunnel? No

Did you see any beings in your experience? No

Did you encounter or become aware of any deceased beings? No

Did you see or feel surrounded by a brilliant light? No

Did you see an unearthly light? Uncertain
I have a vague recollection of a pin of light when I became frightened, but I’m not sure. I don’t remember that part clearly. It could’ve just been my vision being restored as I regained consciousness.

Did you seem to enter another world? A clearly mystical or unearthly realm
A black void.

What emotions did you feel during the experience? Extremely comfortable pleasure

Did you have a feeling of peace or pleasantness? Incredible peace or pleasantness

Did you have a feeling of joy? No

Did you feel a sense of harmony or unity with the universe? No

Did you suddenly understand everything? No

Did scenes from your past come back? No

Did you reach a boundary or limiting physical structure? No

Did you come to a border or point of no return? I came to a definite conscious decision to return to life
I believe I remembered or thought of my mother, without words. I felt like I couldn’t hurt her by dying, so I resisted the feelings of pleasure and comfort.

God, Spiritual and Religion:

What was your religion prior to your experience? Unaffiliated- Nothing in particular- Secular unaffiliated

Have your religious practices changed? No

What is your religion now? Unaffiliated- Agnostic
I sometimes entertain that there is a god, but do not know. I am more philosophically inclined than religious.

Did your experience include features consistent with your earthly beliefs? Content that was entirely not consistent with the beliefs you had at the time of your experience
I don’t know how to answer this because I was a child. But I don’t think I believed in formlessness or void, nor that there could be comfort ability or pleasure in either.

Did you have a change in your values and beliefs because of your experience? Yes
Atheism and nihilism.

Did you seem to encounter a mystical being or presence, or hear an unidentifiable voice? No

Did you encounter or become aware of any beings who previously lived on earth who are described by name in religions (for example: Jesus, Muhammad, Buddha, etc.)? No

During your experience, did you gain information about premortal existence? No

During your experience, did you gain information about universal connection or oneness? No

During your experience, did you gain information about the existence of God? No

Concerning our Earthly lives other than Religion:

During your experience, did you gain special knowledge or information about your purpose? No

During your experience, did you gain information about the meaning of life? No

During your experience, did you gain information about an afterlife? No

Did you gain information about how to live our lives? No

During your experience, did you gain information about life's difficulties, challenges and hardships? No

During your experience, did you gain information about love? No

What life changes occurred in your life after your experience? Large changes in my life
I am educated in philosophy, so I argue about everything. I believe that likely has contributed more than my experience to my current worldviews. After my experience, up until my thyroid cancer started affecting my health, I was intensely atheistic and nihilistic. Thyroid cancer wrecked my mental health and I became monotheistic. Then I found philosophy and the changes above happened.

Have your relationships changed specifically because of your experience? Uncertain
It happened at a young age. I don’t remember enough about prior to.

After the NDE:

Was the experience difficult to express in words? No

How accurately do you remember the experience in comparison to other life events that occurred around the time of the experience? I remember the experience more accurately than other life events that occurred around the time of the experience
I was a child, but I have a well defined vision of what happened, as with many of my other traumas. But I can remember clearly what happened prior to and after as well as during quite clearly.

Do you have any psychic, non-ordinary or other special gifts after your experience that you did not have before the experience? No

Have you ever shared this experience with others? Yes
A decade and a half. I don’t remember what their reactions were, but they were a therapist so it wasn’t likely personal.

Did you have any knowledge of near death experience (NDE) prior to your experience? No

What did you believe about the reality of your experience shortly (days to weeks) after it happened? Experience was definitely real
I don’t remember, truthfully. I didn’t feel anything. Didn’t believe anything.

What do you believe about the reality of your experience now? Experience was definitely real
It was at least real in that it was an experience, a perception, not necessarily in that a void is a place, or that nothing is real.

At any time in your life, has anything ever reproduced any part of the experience? No

Did the questions asked and information that you provided accurately and comprehensively describe your experience? Uncertain
There is a lack of belief that has resulted, and an unwavering uncertainty in everything. I don’t believe that uncertainty or disbelief has been quantified in the questions.