Faith F Possible NDE

Experience Description

After the birth of my son, I acquired a very serious infection. Three months later, I was still extremely sick. On the night of my NDE, I had fallen asleep in my bed with my head cocked in a terrible position. My chin was pressing down hard against my chest, cutting off the air supply and circulation to my entire body. I did not realize this until I returned to my body and awoke.

All of a sudden, I found myself floating near the ceiling and moving down the hallway from my bedroom. At first, I was very confused. What was I doing up there? I remember looking down at the top of the trim above the bathroom doorway at the end of the hallway. I then moved back toward my bedroom and looked down at the top of the trim above the doorway to my son’s bedroom.

I saw every tiny detail, including the wood grain of the trim, the dust that had collected on it over the years, and the stains from wall paint that had inadvertently gotten on the inside edges. I became curious about what was inside the bedroom and floated down to enter it. I did not decide to go inside. It was as though I thought about what might be inside, and then I was suddenly floating into the room.

As I floated inside, I saw a small baby sleeping peacefully. I saw every single tiny detail, including the texture and color of the carved wood on the crib, the colors and patterns of the sheet beneath the baby, and the colors, patterns, and folds of the blanket gently covering the baby’s legs. I saw the sweet, sweet expression on the baby’s face as he slept and sucked his thumb.

I did not know this baby. I did not know that he was my son.

All of a sudden, I heard a voice, loud and clear. It was a combination of an authoritative, otherworldly voice and my own voice at the same time. It said very clearly, “YOU DO NOT BELONG HERE!”

Without even thinking about it, I was back in my body and lying in my bed. I was frightened and tried to move so I could wake my husband, who was sleeping next to me, but I could not move. I was totally and completely awake, but I could not move at all.

It was like when one of your limbs falls asleep and is numb when you awaken. You have to pick up the limb and shake it to restore the circulation. This time, however, my entire body had no circulation. I then realized how my head was positioned against my chest.

I tried to call out, but I could not speak. Slowly, I was able to lift my chin. Little by little, the circulation returned to my body. It took a very long time before I could move and finally call out to my husband.

Background Information:

Gender: Female

Date of NDE: 10/30/1983

NDE Elements:

At the time of your experience, was there an associated life-threatening event? No

How do you consider the content of your experience? Entirely distressing

Did you feel separated from your body? I clearly left my body and existed outside it
As soon as I was able to move, I immediately got out of bed and ran down the hallway to my baby son's room. I looked at him sleeping in his crib, and he was in the exact same position as I had seen him, still sucking his thumb!

How did your highest level of consciousness and alertness during the experience compare to your normal everyday consciousness and alertness? I would say that it was as I moved down into my son's bedroom.
Every single tiny detail was apparent to me. In normal consciousness, we do not notice these minute things.

At what time during the experience were you at your highest level of consciousness? More consciousness and alertness than normal

Were your thoughts speeded up? No

Did time seem to speed up or slow down? Everything seemed to be happening at once; or time stopped or lost all meaning
There was no time. I was just there, floating around, not even thinking about time.

Were your senses more vivid than usual? Incredibly more vivid

Please compare your vision during the experience to your everyday vision that you had immediately prior to the time of the experience I was aware of every tiny detail. Colors, shapes, textures, auras of the atmosphere, darkness and light.

Please compare your hearing during the experience to your everyday hearing that you had immediately prior to the time of the experience I heard every single little breath that my son was taking. I heard the sucking sound as he sucked his little thumb.

Did you seem to be aware of things going on elsewhere? No

Did you pass into or through a tunnel? No

Did you see any beings in your experience? No

Did you encounter or become aware of any deceased beings? No

Did you see or feel surrounded by a brilliant light? No

Did you see an unearthly light? No

Did you seem to enter another world? Some unfamiliar and strange place
I couldn't describe where I was. It didn't make any sense to me. I was very uncomfortable floating up at the ceiling and certainly felt like this was not normal.

What emotions did you feel during the experience? Confusion, annoyance. A why am I here feeling, an I shouldn't be here feeling. This baby needs to be sleeping, and I might be disturbing him.

Did you have a feeling of peace or pleasantness? No

Did you have a feeling of joy? No

Did you feel a sense of harmony or unity with the universe? No

Did you suddenly understand everything? No

Did scenes from your past come back? No

Did you reach a boundary or limiting physical structure? Yes
The doorways seemed to be physical, as in normal life. I couldn't float through the walls above or around the doorways but instead had to float down in order to enter a room.

Did you come to a border or point of no return? I came to a barrier that I was not permitted to cross; or was sent back against my will
A voice said, "You are not supposed to be here," and I was immediately sent back into my body.

God, Spiritual and Religion:

What was your religion prior to your experience? Unaffiliated - Agnostic
Raised as a Catholic but was questioning whether to continue in this religion.

Have your religious practices changed? Yes
At the time, I was unsure about my affiliation with the Catholic Church, but afterward I knew that organized religion is not the way that I want to think about or have a relationship with God.

What is your religion now? Unaffiliated - Agnostic
Have since decided that religious organization is no longer needed in my life. God is everywhere and in all. There is no need to separate oneself into sections. We are all one with God.

Did your experience include features consistent with your earthly beliefs? Content that was entirely not consistent with the beliefs you had at the time of your experience
During the experience, I felt that I was alone with no person that I knew around me. I did not know the baby was my son. I did not remember that I was married and that my husband was down the hall in the bed with me (my body at that point). But I did feel that there was a controlling presence of a supreme entity there with me the whole time.

Did you have a change in your values and beliefs because of your experience? Yes
I know there is a God or supreme being or entity. There is no doubt in my mind now.

Did you seem to encounter a mystical being or presence, or hear an unidentifiable voice? I heard a voice I could not identify
A loud voice told me I did not belong where I was.

Did you encounter or become aware of any beings who previously lived on earth who are described by name in religions (for example: Jesus, Muhammad, Buddha, etc.)? No

During your experience, did you gain information about premortal existence? No

During your experience, did you gain information about universal connection or oneness? Uncertain
Just a feeling of someone, an all-encompassing entity that was present and watching over.

During your experience, did you gain information about the existence of God? Yes
It was just a feeling. A definite feeling that a supreme being was in control of all that was occurring.

Concerning our Earthly lives other than Religion:

During your experience, did you gain special knowledge or information about your purpose? No

During your experience, did you gain information about the meaning of life? No

During your experience, did you gain information about an afterlife? No

Did you gain information about how to live our lives? No

During your experience, did you gain information about life's difficulties, challenges and hardships? Yes
Perhaps just a small feeling of sadness that I was unable to embrace life to its fullest at that time.

During your experience, did you gain information about love? No

What life changes occurred in your life after your experience? Slight changes in my life
I know that there is a God or supreme being or entity. I believe this being is all and everything. The earth and all that is in it were given to us not only to care for and do good in it but to enjoy it as well.

Have your relationships changed specifically because of your experience? No

After the NDE:

Was the experience difficult to express in words? No

How accurately do you remember the experience in comparison to other life events that occurred around the time of the experience? I remember the experience more accurately than other life events that occurred around the time of the experience
I do not have any physical proof of the experience except that my son was in the exact same position as I saw him during the experience. I feel strongly that my remembrance is accurate.

Do you have any psychic, non-ordinary or other special gifts after your experience that you did not have before the experience? Uncertain
I have dreamt vivid dreams of a few loved ones' deaths before they died unexpectedly.

Are there one or several parts of your experience that are especially meaningful or significant to you? Yes, that I am here to care for the wonderful people in my life.

Have you ever shared this experience with others? Yes
I told my husband immediately. I'm not sure he totally believed that it was an NDE; he may have thought it was just a dream. I am convinced it was an NDE.

Did you have any knowledge of near death experience (NDE) prior to your experience? Yes
I had another NDE when I was young, around 13 years old. I looked into it after that.

What did you believe about the reality of your experience shortly (days to weeks) after it happened? Experience was definitely real
I knew it was real. I can't even explain fully how and why I know for sure it was real. It just was real and that is it!

What do you believe about the reality of your experience now? Experience was definitely real
I can vividly remember the entire experience and can remember the exact feelings that I was feeling in those moments.

At any time in your life, has anything ever reproduced any part of the experience? No

Did the questions asked and information that you provided accurately and comprehensively describe your experience? Yes
I believe that I have given all of the information I can possibly give as I remember it now.

Anything else to add? Only that looking back on it now, I realize that we are all here for a purpose. We may not realize it all the time, but we are living the life we were sent here to live.