Christine Experiences

Experience Description

I do not remember anything before or after this incident. The only thing I know is that I was being watched by dear family friends while my parents were at a cousin's wedding. I only know this from my parents and other family members. I remember for myself that my parents were not there, but I did not know why until I asked about it later as an adult.

We were outside. At least I was outside with the two adults, a married couple, who were watching me. At least one of their older children was there, although I remember feeling as though several of their children were present. We were hanging around an above-ground pool. I remember people sitting around the pool. I am unsure whether anyone was actually in the pool. I also do not know whether I was standing around the pool or was on top of a raft in the pool.

All I personally remember is that I slipped from wherever I was and went under the water. I remember that I could not breathe, could not swim, and struggled to get back up for air. I remember my head hitting a raft and realizing that I would not be able to get up to the surface because of it.

I do not remember anything else. I do not even remember anyone pulling me out. Even though I do not remember that part, it is like I know that is what happened. No one has ever spoken to me about this event because I only talked about it when I got older. By then, the family friends who had watched me had already passed away. If their children were present, they were probably too young themselves to remember. I never thought to ask them, and we no longer keep in touch.

I had a separate experience during those same very early childhood years. Only in the past year did I realize that they might potentially be related. Perhaps the near-drowning, or perceived near-drowning, incident described above directly preceded the experience that I describe below. Perhaps it did not.

I have always counted this experience as one of my earliest memories and always knew it to be a memory, despite later relegating it to just a dream.

My maternal grandmother died in 1981, before I was even conceived, let alone born. I was born in October 1983. For as long as I can remember, there were "ghost stories" about my grandmother visiting me and at least one of my older cousins throughout my early childhood. We always had pictures of her in our home and in my relatives' homes, and she was spoken of frequently.

As a young child, I believed wholeheartedly that I knew her. I believed that I had actually met her and knew her "in the flesh" during this incarnation and earthly experience. As my mind and intellect grew, however, I could not understand how it would have been possible for me to have met, seen, and known someone who died more than two years before I was born. Yet somehow, I just knew it to be true.

There are some very specific stories about things that my grandmother told me. I do not remember these incidents myself, but my parents told me about them throughout my childhood. I do not know the order in which any of them happened, but they were told to me as follows.

I was brought to the babysitter's house while my parents went to the funeral of one of my mother's uncles, who was my grandmother's brother. In the car on the way there, I reportedly told my parents that I knew they were going to Uncle James's funeral. I then went on to provide further details about the location and situation.

Stunned, they asked, "Who told you that?" The information certainly had not come from either of them. I replied, "Noonie," which was the name my family used for my deceased grandmother.

My parents tried to find another source for my knowledge, aside from my grandmother, but could not. Of course, perhaps I overheard adults talking. That cannot be ruled out. From the way my mother tells it, however, there was no reasonable explanation for how I arrived at this knowledge other than her dead mother telling me.

Another incident occurred in my backyard at home. I was outside playing and then came inside, but I left the back door open. My mother instructed me to close the door, but I replied that I could not. When she pressed me further to close it, she said that I told her, "I have to leave it open for Noonie. She wants to come in."

According to my mother, this chilled her, but not as much as what came next. I went on to explain that Noonie kept coming to me because she wanted my mom to go and live with her.

That sentiment has also been repeated by other, older relatives. My aunt, for example, suffered a double aneurysm rupture in her brain in 2001. After coming out of her weeklong coma, she told us that Noonie kept coming to her and telling my aunt that she wanted her to go and live with her.

I do not recall those incidents myself, but I do remember one very specific visitation that my grandmother made to me.

I was at one of my aunts' houses when my deceased grandmother came to the front door. I do not recall my aunt being surprised by this. Of course, it would have been a huge event if her dead mother had materialized in front of her in waking life.

From what I have always remembered, my aunt opened the door for me so that I could go outside and see my grandmother. I very specifically remember the doorway, the threshold, and the hanging potted plants on the front porch. I do not know why, but those hanging potted plants have been one of the most persistent details in this memory for almost 40 years.

I remember crossing the threshold to go outside with my grandmother. She then hoisted me up, and I was at eye level with the hanging flowers on the porch.

Next, we were in a field, but I do not remember or know how we got there. It was the most beautiful field I have ever seen. It was almost like a cartoon, and maybe it was a cartoon.

My favorite movie back then was the now-banned Disney film Song of the South, which was itself part cartoon and part live action. This memory always felt like some kind of mixture of "live action" reality and "cartoon" reality.

I distinctly remember the old Black man from that movie being there. I just looked it up. His name was James, and the character he played in the film was Uncle Remus. He also provided the voice of Brier Fox.

Just seeing his image right now struck right through me. That is undoubtedly the man I saw with my grandmother, in all of his beautiful and joyful glory. Perhaps it is also interesting that I just read that James died of heart failure in 1948, just as my grandmother died of heart failure in 1981.

I was in this beautiful field with my grandmother. I saw James, and he saw us. He looked up and waved at us. My grandmother waved back, and it was like we all knew each other.

It was so joyful and happy. It was simply bliss.

I was so happy to be there and so happy to see my grandmother. I was also specifically so happy to see James. I do not remember doing, saying, thinking, or experiencing much else. I remember feeling how incredibly beautiful this field was among all these crazy, vibrant flowers and the amazing natural landscape. I remember the joy and love that radiated from that man and from my grandmother. Most of all, I remember such a happy, peaceful, incredible feeling.

I do not remember getting back to the house. I just know that I have lived my whole life knowing that I really went to that place. I continued to know it even through my atheist, materialist, scientific assurance, although I never understood how it could be possible.

As I grew older into childhood and adolescence, I relegated that experience to nothing more than a dream. The memory of it would frequently catch me and startle me. It was as though I were only dreaming that the world could actually be more than what meets the eye. I was so very scared, fearful, and disbelieving that it could actually be true.

Even though it never sat right with me that my experience was nothing more than a dream, I could no longer find the connection with my grandmother that I supposedly once had. Once I became old enough to retain memories more consistently, I had no memory of the other ghost stories that people told me about. My inability to find that connection led me into a very deep, dark, and depressing atheism for more than three decades.

Somehow, however, I still always felt that the "dream" was not a dream. I felt that it was a real experience that I had, even though it made no sense.

On October 6, 2024, I experienced a miraculous and spontaneous healing in the middle of the worst PTSD episode I have ever had. It was not long after that healing, which came from a pulsating and profoundly loving green light, that I allowed myself to know that the experience with my grandmother and James was, in fact, real.

It was probably more real than anything else I have ever experienced.

Background Information:

Gender: Female

Date of NDE: 00/00/1986

NDE Elements:

At the time of your experience, was there an associated life-threatening event? Uncertain
I've carried both of these events for basically my entire life, as I was just a toddler/young child when they happened. It wasn't until recently, after a spontaneous healing, and beginning to remember more and more about who we truly are as infinite beings fractaled from the same united and all-Loving Source, that it hit me...whoa, I think the experience I had in that amazing "heaven"-like space with my deceased grandmother was the direct result of drowning in that pool; not two separate events but a cause-and-effect series of events.

How do you consider the content of your experience? Entirely pleasant

Did you feel separated from your body? No

How did your highest level of consciousness and alertness during the experience compare to your normal everyday consciousness and alertness? When I was all the way in it, as opposed to before it/getting there or after it/integrating it.
I'm only guessing here, but because the vividness of this experience has never left me, and it's one of my earliest memories, I'm saying it was heightened.

At what time during the experience were you at your highest level of consciousness? More consciousness and alertness than normal

Were your thoughts speeded up? No

Did time seem to speed up or slow down? No

Were your senses more vivid than usual? More vivid than usual

Please compare your vision during the experience to your everyday vision that you had immediately prior to the time of the experience Again, this is hard to comment on from so long ago, but it seemed like what I was seeing with my eyes was unlike anything I've ever seen on earth.

Please compare your hearing during the experience to your everyday hearing that you had immediately prior to the time of the experience I don't recall anything unique about what I heard.

Did you seem to be aware of things going on elsewhere? No

Did you pass into or through a tunnel? No

Did you see any beings in your experience? No

Did you encounter or become aware of any deceased beings? Yes
My deceased grandmother and the deceased actor James Basket.

Did you see or feel surrounded by a brilliant light? No

Did you see an unearthly light? No

Did you seem to enter another world? A clearly mystical or unearthly realm
It felt similar to earth, or even earth but like a really, really, really special place on earth where the impossible was possible (colors, cartoonishness).

What emotions did you feel during the experience? Joy, bliss, love, peace, happiness, playfulness, excitement, all the good and positive things.

Did you have a feeling of peace or pleasantness? Incredible peace or pleasantness

Did you have a feeling of joy? Incredible joy

Did you feel a sense of harmony or unity with the universe? No

Did you suddenly understand everything? No

Did scenes from your past come back? No

Did you reach a boundary or limiting physical structure? Uncertain
I saw a lot more than the immediate landscape I was in (the field), definitely hills or small mountains in the distance, but we were only walking this one sort of "lane" in the field. I don't recall being told I couldn't go anywhere else, but I know I felt like I wanted to; we were just in that one lane of the field.

Did you come to a border or point of no return? No

God, Spiritual and Religion:

What was your religion prior to your experience? Christian - Catholic
This incident happened before my first memories in this lifetime, and my family was not religious so I do not know to what extent religion may or may not have played out here.

Have your religious practices changed? No

What is your religion now? Other or several faiths
I was an angry, anxious atheist for most of my life, until a spontaneous healing on October 6, 2024. I now fully know that this life is not all that there is, that we are all fractaled expressions of the same Source/God/Spirit/Divinity/Universe/Love/etc. I don't follow any specific religion and see the beauty and differently represented "truths" in everything and everyone, including religions.

Did your experience include features consistent with your earthly beliefs? Content that was both consistent and not consistent with the beliefs you had at the time of your experience
I'm only guessing here, because it was so long ago. I think it's possible I knew that cartoons weren't a part of real life (and some of my experienced landscape was cartoonish) and that my grandmother was deceased, so I might have had an awareness even at that young age that this was a departure from reality. But maybe I didn't know that back then when it happened, and I've only applied that in hindsight.

Did you have a change in your values and beliefs because of your experience? No

Did you seem to encounter a mystical being or presence, or hear an unidentifiable voice? No

Did you encounter or become aware of any beings who previously lived on earth who are described by name in religions (for example: Jesus, Muhammad, Buddha, etc.)? No

During your experience, did you gain information about premortal existence? No

During your experience, did you gain information about universal connection or oneness? No

During your experience, did you gain information about the existence of God? No

Concerning our Earthly lives other than Religion:

During your experience, did you gain special knowledge or information about your purpose? No

During your experience, did you gain information about the meaning of life? No

During your experience, did you gain information about an afterlife? No

Did you gain information about how to live our lives? No

During your experience, did you gain information about life's difficulties, challenges and hardships? No

During your experience, did you gain information about love? No

What life changes occurred in your life after your experience? Unknown
(Just commenting on the second to last question here: "At the current time I am greatly fearful in living my earthly life." I am in the middle of a complete destruction of my life via a shocking and high-conflict divorce, complete with realization of my spouse's decades-long drug addiction, so everything earthly I have known is all of a sudden turned upside down. I do not fear death; the only thing I fear is the pain and suffering that can come with an earthly existence!)

Have your relationships changed specifically because of your experience? Uncertain
They have now...but in retrospect, finally giving respect and authority to this experience.

After the NDE:

Was the experience difficult to express in words? Uncertain
In between, I would say, because there are no words to explain the colors (of the flowers/nature) nor the feelings. Nothing we have here comes close.

How accurately do you remember the experience in comparison to other life events that occurred around the time of the experience? I remember the experience more accurately than other life events that occurred around the time of the experience
This may, or may not, be my earliest memory. If it isn't the earliest, it is definitely one of the earliest and even in young childhood I was trying to place it accurately in my personal history, but it just perplexed me.

Do you have any psychic, non-ordinary or other special gifts after your experience that you did not have before the experience? Uncertain
I was probably more "plugged in" before and shortly after this experience than once my mind matured and I lost connection... But I have been working towards developing more "spiritual sight" in the past two years.

Are there one or several parts of your experience that are especially meaningful or significant to you? Every single part of it. It is my most vivid and (I think) oldest surviving memory, a constant companion of mine through every season of life, including my terrified atheism.

Have you ever shared this experience with others? Yes
I was never afraid to talk about this, but it never occurred to me to share it the way that I am now.

Did you have any knowledge of near death experience (NDE) prior to your experience? No

What did you believe about the reality of your experience shortly (days to weeks) after it happened? Experience was definitely real
This I know for certain. I spent my young childhood knowing this was real, through and through.

What do you believe about the reality of your experience now? Experience was definitely real
After 3+ decades of atheism and then a sudden, miraculous, spontaneous healing/cracking open...I know this was real.

At any time in your life, has anything ever reproduced any part of the experience? Yes
Not often, but in the last two years I have sensed the presence of my grandmother and found synchronicities related to her.

Did the questions asked and information that you provided accurately and comprehensively describe your experience? Yes

Anything else to add? I had a series of "awakenings," mainly in late 2024, that helped me reorient back to this childhood experience.