Aleksey NDE

Experience Description

My consciousness and memories began from the age of 2 or 3. I remember what happened at that time. Even now, I remembered an episode of death. I don't remember how I left my body or anything else, but I clearly remember hanging or flying over an operating table. I saw the doctors, the tables, the lamp, the shelves, the instrument tables, and the floor tiles. I saw the commotion among the doctors. I remember it all so clearly that 35 or 36 years later, I remember it as if it were yesterday. I could even draw it in detail now.

During surgery, I was hovering over the table. BUT I did not see the flight itself. Where my body should have been, there was something black, like a censor bar. It was like a dark space. It was not an abyss, but something invisible; as if my body was being hidden from me. I wouldn't describe it as fabric in the usual sense. I remember thinking at that moment, "What is happening? Why are they standing here and why are they so worried?" This lasted about one or two minutes, and that's it.

I don't remember anything after that. I didn't see myself leaving the body or re-entering it. I only remember this one episode, and I remember it in extreme detail.

Background Information:

Gender: Male

Date of NDE: 9/2/1990

NDE Elements:

At the time of your experience, was there an associated life-threatening event? Yes
During childbirth, the umbilical cord was poorly severed. As a result, I lost blood through my abdomen. This was trauma inflicted by a doctor or nurse; all this is from the words of my parents and my treating surgeon who saved me then. The nurses treated the navel with green dye, assuring that everything was fine. As I understood, this formed adhesions leading to a strangulated intestinal obstruction. An emergency operation was conducted, and my surgeon said then that if we had not sought help earlier, the child, meaning me, would have died. In the end, there were two operations at the same site, leaving a terrible and ugly scar. I find it difficult to answer exactly when the clinical death occurred, due to my age at the time, I was between 0 and 12 months old. However, clinical death was recorded, most likely due to significant blood loss. I do not know the exact details, but my father gave me a transfusion of his own blood, and it was a lot.

How do you consider the content of your experience? Both pleasant AND distressing

Did you feel separated from your body? I clearly left my body and existed outside it
As I described earlier, I saw the operating room, doctors in gowns, in medical masks, the operating lamp, medical cabinets, the table with instruments, and the table where I lay.

How did your highest level of consciousness and alertness during the experience compare to your normal everyday consciousness and alertness? I cannot answer.
I find it difficult to answer.

At what time during the experience were you at your highest level of consciousness? More consciousness and alertness than normal

Were your thoughts speeded up? No

Did time seem to speed up or slow down? No

Were your senses more vivid than usual? Incredibly more vivid

Please compare your vision during the experience to your everyday vision that you had immediately prior to the time of the experience There was clear vision, I saw everything sharply, clarity of mind, lightness.

Please compare your hearing during the experience to your everyday hearing that you had immediately prior to the time of the experience I could hear the doctors talking, but I did not understand their speech, I did not understand what they were saying, as if I did not understand the language.

Did you seem to be aware of things going on elsewhere? No

Did you pass into or through a tunnel? No

Did you see any beings in your experience? No

Did you encounter or become aware of any deceased beings? No

Did you see or feel surrounded by a brilliant light? No

Did you see an unearthly light? Uncertain
More like a black shadow, or a black spot where my body lay, and I could not see myself. Something black, not reflecting light, although the light was abundant and bright from the lamps in the operating room.

Did you seem to enter another world? No

What emotions did you feel during the experience? It is difficult to describe what exactly I felt, but I remember there was a feeling that this is how it should be. I remember not being subject to gravity, floating in the air, feeling lightness. I did not fully understand what was happening here and why they were standing and looking into that black emptiness, even though the light was shining brightly. I understood that they were trying to do something, but I did not understand what or why.

Did you have a feeling of peace or pleasantness? Relief or calmness

Did you have a feeling of joy? No

Did you feel a sense of harmony or unity with the universe? I felt united or one with the world

Did you suddenly understand everything? No

Did scenes from your past come back? No

Did you reach a boundary or limiting physical structure? No

Did you come to a border or point of no return? No

God, Spiritual and Religion:

What was your religion prior to your experience? Unaffiliated - Atheist
I was a child.

Have your religious practices changed? Uncertain
It changed over the course of my life. Until I was about 10 to 12 years old, I believed in Christ. But when I started asking questions—like who invented religion and why, or who we worship and why—I came to the conclusion that it is all nonsense, designed to control people. Now, I'm more inclined to believe in the theory of paleocontact, not as an absolute truth, but as a more probable origin for us. This is more a separate topic for discussion.

What is your religion now? Unaffiliated - Atheist
Common sense and life experience have convinced me that religion is an instrument for manipulating people, and religion was created to justify all sorts of not very good deeds. Essentially, in my view, any religion is a sect(s) that has become entrenched in society.

Did your experience include features consistent with your earthly beliefs? Content that was both consistent and not consistent with the beliefs you had at the time of your experience
If I understood the question correctly, then yes, it was exactly as people who have experienced clinical death have described. I was also floating above my body, high up near the ceiling. However, I could not see myself, as if there was a black censor bar.

Did you have a change in your values and beliefs because of your experience? Yes
I have a strongly developed trait: empathy, compassion. I can feel the pain of other people, psychologically and not mystically. I can put myself in the place of a person who is suffering or in pain better than anyone else. I connect this trait specifically with this episode. As if I understood that I did not simply survive, as if my purpose is to help, although this sounds somewhat mystical.

Did you seem to encounter a mystical being or presence, or hear an unidentifiable voice? I heard a voice I could not identify
I only heard the voices of doctors, but did not hear other voices; it was quiet.

Did you encounter or become aware of any beings who previously lived on earth who are described by name in religions (for example: Jesus, Muhammad, Buddha, etc.)? No

During your experience, did you gain information about premortal existence? No

During your experience, did you gain information about universal connection or oneness? No

During your experience, did you gain information about the existence of God? No

Concerning our Earthly lives other than Religion:

During your experience, did you gain special knowledge or information about your purpose? No

During your experience, did you gain information about the meaning of life? No

During your experience, did you gain information about an afterlife? Uncertain
I may be mistaken, but according to my memories, I understood or felt that I was waiting for something, though what is unclear. Only the result of the operation. It was as if I was hovering in anticipation of a return to the body or in expectation of being sent somewhere.

Did you gain information about how to live our lives? No

During your experience, did you gain information about life's difficulties, challenges and hardships? No

During your experience, did you gain information about love? No

What life changes occurred in your life after your experience? Large changes in my life
As a rational person, a skeptic, who always verifies information, and as an experienced person who never takes anyone's word for it, and who already knows this physical life and understands everything perfectly, I understand that in theory this could be games of the mind/psyche. But I cannot give a precise answer as to why I remember this episode so clearly. For me, this experience remains an open question for my entire life, and I have never been able to answer what it was. But I considered it necessary to tell about it, as I believe in science and believe that my experience might help science a little, and your project and people. Even a small contribution. Also, there were a couple of other episodes in life with a mystical context, but I am not inclined to believe in them 100% as I am a skeptic. However, I also want to tell about one that happened in the winter of 2024. Winters in Russia are harsh, there was a lot of snow. I was going to a training session, crossing the road at a place where people are often killed (a dangerous crossing on a raised part of the road). I stood by the road, almost right next to it, about 1-2 meters away, when suddenly a sharp voice of indeterminate gender yelled, 'GET AWAY!' And I obeyed without question and stepped back 2-3 meters. Within 3-4 seconds, a jeep slid on the snow and fell exactly where I had been standing. There was an accident, and the jeep tried to turn and leave the scene, but it rolled into the snowdrift. Due to its high ground clearance, the jeep lifted up on the snowdrift like on a trampoline and flew (I could see the underside of the jeep from below) and then landed exactly where I should have been standing. The accident was serious but without fatalities. A strange episode with no explanation. I cannot precisely connect this with what I experienced at age one, but still, maybe there is a connection. There was another episode when I was 14. A classmate of mine died. I was the only one who was deeply affected; others suffered and cried. She came to me in a dream, and everything was just as clearly visible and audible as that episode when I floated above my body in the hospital. In general, she appeared in a dream, against a background of bright light, fog, and my friend, who said I should not grieve, that I would meet her again, 'THERE' (and pointed a finger upward). I asked, 'How should I understand this?' She replied, 'You people are still foolish and do not understand divine matters, but with each year you will grow wiser as if drinking a cup of knowledge...' Then there were two blurry figures of indeterminate gender; I could not make them out. They told her it was time to go, that she had already spent a lot of time talking with me (we spoke for about 15-20 seconds) and I woke up abruptly. Although I understand that this story sounds like the ravings of a madman, I do not rule out the possibility that it was a real contact with the other world. (If interested, you can contact me by mail. I can give more detailed and complete information about everything that happened, but I have told you the main essence of what happened). So again, I cannot say for sure whether there is a connection between these episodes and the fact that I died at age one.

Have your relationships changed specifically because of your experience? Uncertain
It's hard to say.

After the NDE:

Was the experience difficult to express in words? Uncertain
It would not be difficult to express. I could describe my experience in detail, and even draw it, although it was brief.

How accurately do you remember the experience in comparison to other life events that occurred around the time of the experience? I remember the experience more accurately than other life events that occurred around the time of the experience
Considering this happened when I was a newborn, I can affirm that I clearly remember that episode. I even remembered it when I was a 2-3-4 year old child, and I remember it to this day. I remember it as if it happened yesterday.

Do you have any psychic, non-ordinary or other special gifts after your experience that you did not have before the experience? No

Are there one or several parts of your experience that are especially meaningful or significant to you? Well, if we consider my ugly scar on my stomach, then yes, it always bothered me; I was ashamed of it. But now at 36 years old, I don't care what people say about the scar.

Have you ever shared this experience with others? Yes
The first time I shared this experience was when I was about 12 to 14 years old. As usually happens, people just laughed and said it was a fantasy or schizophrenia. To this day, if I share this story with someone, they laugh in the same way and do not believe me. (But I understand them; people tend to distrust such stories.)

Did you have any knowledge of near death experience (NDE) prior to your experience? No

What did you believe about the reality of your experience shortly (days to weeks) after it happened? Experience was probably real
If I understood the question correctly, then I do not assert 100% that it was real, as I allow for the fact that my psyche could have painted this and imprinted it in my memory. But what I experienced was very vivid, so much so that even at 36 I remember it well. In general, to be honest, I believe about 60% that it was real and about 40% that it was games of the mind and imagination.

What do you believe about the reality of your experience now? Experience was probably real
As I wrote above, I think it was 60% real and that the brain's fantasy is 40%. I would also sincerely like to find an answer to this question.

At any time in your life, has anything ever reproduced any part of the experience? Uncertain
I could be wrong, but perhaps this is related to those episodes where I heard a voice that warned me and an encounter with a deceased classmate. Maybe my near-death experience at age one is connected to this. (But this is speculation.)

Did the questions asked and information that you provided accurately and comprehensively describe your experience? Yes
Yes.

Anything else to add? Basically, I have said everything above; I conveyed the essence as it was.