Experience Description

Paranormal experience 19/20th March 2007

On the evening of 19th march 2007 for some reason, I fell into a state of unconsciousness on my bed as I prepared for sleep and regained consciousness the following day. It was later thought that I had suffered a stroke, but I had not been rendered unconscious by any previous TIA. At some stage during this timeframe, I experienced a sensation of falling. It was not a tumbling sensation but like a skydiver in free fall and very frightening. It seemed to go on for an undeterminable period of time, then the falling stopped and I felt myself leave my own body through the navel area after which I was floating at the ceiling of a room so that I was looking down on this environment. I recall looking over and noticed my legs were suspended horizontal to the ceiling. The room was small and its decor a misty grey and I was immediately embraced by an overwhelming sense of peace, tranquility, serenity and silence and the lack of any fear and pain. It was the most beautiful feeling I had ever experienced. I also had this feeling of intense gratification.

There was a person lying on a bed who was covered in a grey sheet which was folded down to the shoulders and the head of the person was supported by two thin pillows so that the weight of the head on the pillows caused the middle of them to sink in and the outer edges to slightly flare up and out. I recognized the person lying on the bed as myself. I was in my own accommodation. My mouth and eyes were closed, my hair combed and a slight bulge in the sheet indicated my hands were clasped together at the waist. Apart from this, I was lying in the supine position. Everything in the room was a light misty grey except for a slightly orange colored light on one wall. But nothing seemed to be in proportion. Then there appeared at the side of the bed but standing back about six feet, three figures who were dressed in either mortuary or surgical gowns and caps and these figures were also swathed in misty grey and stood side by side in silence. The figure at the center of the three was taller than the other two and was a male. The figure at the left was a female and the one on the right was also a male. I recognized the female on the left as my mother who had died in 1983, and the male on the right as my father who had also died in 1983. The taller male in the middle I recognized as my brother who had died in 1994. In life, my mother was 5ft 6" tall and my father 5ft 9" but now my father appeared to be so emaciated that he was shorter than my mother who had almost retained her pre-death stature. My brother in life was 6ft 1" and was at least a head taller than the others were though he had shrunk slightly. The three figures had a strange, almost zombie like aura about them and looked very old, tired and haggard in appearance. All three stood and stared at myself lying on the bed for only a short time then they began to move their mouths open and shut in unison like goldfish and I realized they were trying to speak to me but I could hear no words. I did not know if they could see me floating or not but I could still see both them and myself from where I was. They then began to make hand gestures, also in unison, at myself as though they were beckoning me to follow them.

It was then that I noticed that behind the three was a door and through the gap at the bottom of this door, I could see a most intense light. The light did not spill into the room where I was but was totally contained on the other side of the door except what I could see through the gap. It was the whitest light I had ever seen, much brighter than any light on earth, and yet it did not hurt my eyes. I was still floating at the ceiling all of this time as well. I was fascinated by the presence of this light, it was though it was a 'being' of some sort and it radiated everything that was good and I still experienced the same beautiful feelings. After a while, the three figures turned and appeared to melt into and through the door. After that, I experienced nothing more until I regained consciousness and noticed I was still on my own bed at which time I began to experience the most abject fear ever and was terribly confused. All of a sudden, I realized I had witnessed my own death. I had left my physical body, met my dead family and encountered the light and for some reason I had returned. It was as though something or someone had determined that it was not my time to go and had sent me back. I did not know if I was really angry that I had been clutched back from death or was just scared. It was like I might have been in some sort of suspended animation or cataleptic state. There was very definitely the presence of some paranormal external force, some phenomena that I cannot explain. I just cannot account for that time frame or know for how long the experience lasted, and if I was called I knew I would willingly go there again, even if it meant entering the light and not returning.

I realized that I was still clothed except for my shoes. I was very disorientated and still experienced this fear. I also noticed that I must have left a light on as a wall mounted incandescent light bulb still shone. There is no landline where I live and only very limited cell phone coverage. I managed to exit my room. I reside close to a railway line and upon venturing up the driveway I saw a railway worker who was about to enter a concrete bunker next to the line. There was a railways vehicle parked by the tracks as well. I called out to this person and said I thought I had had a stroke and could he call an ambulance, which he did. When the ambulance arrived I was sitting on the top step of my landing and still very shaken. I could not talk properly and had trouble communicating with them. I had my blood pressure taken twice with a short interval in between and was told it was quite low but rising, also my pulse was feeble but improving. One of the officers made mention about what he called my extremely white pallor and asked if I wanted to go to the hospital, to which I replied 'no' as I had no means of getting home again. One of them also made a comment as to why I chose to live where I did, and I could tell they were starting to get annoyed with me and asked me to make up my mind what I wanted to do as I was holding them up. After a couple of other precautionary tests, they left. I could tell they really had no idea what was wrong with me. Then about five minutes later, they returned and said they were not happy with me and asked if I thought I had fallen into a diabetic coma. I replied that I did not but I was tested for blood / sugar level anyway which proved normal. It was nearly a week before I considered that I had returned to my normal being but the vivid memories of this event remain with me on a daily basis and although the fear has gone I am ever mindful that I must have been either very close to death or even dead at some stage, hence the out of body and near death experience. Now, if I look into my eyes in the mirror I think I can see a certain sadness, though what about I am not sure. I do know that this experience has had a lasting effect on myself and has driven me into an innate corner. I keep on thinking about the light as well and feel that finality is within the light and that if I had entered it I might not have returned.

OBSERVATIONS & CONCLUSIONS

It has taken more than two years of thought to try to establish any logical reasoning for what I experienced and below I have set out my observations and conclusions in trying to explain certain aspects of the experience, yet I cannot explain or account for most of what happened in a physical sense. For much of this time I managed to contain the experience in my sub-conscious then a program on TV3 suddenly spurred me to seriously continue to pursue answers, and I also realized that I am not alone with this and there are other people out there who have experienced the same phenomena as myself. Almost every day for the past few, I have spent working on this statement I keep on coming up with the same details of what happened and nothing has changed. The experience is permanently implanted. Once I had convinced myself, I could not find any more answers I realized that certain phenomena had existed on that day and I could no longer continue to deny that fact. The experience had to come out into the open, I had to live with it, talk to others and accept it least I ran the risk of being consumed by it. Also, it is natural to think about death and dying and as we grow older the more this tends to happen.

1/ I do not recall ever preparing for sleep in my clothes. I must have lain on the bed for some reason, perhaps I felt ill, prior to preparing for sleep and drifted off. I was not covered by any sheet when I came to.

2/ I am certain the dim orange colored light I saw was in fact the wall mounted light left on in my accommodation. There is another light in the room opposite the dimmer one, but this is an energy saver type, gives off a whiter light and was not turned on.

3/ Meeting my family as described meant that my parents were in fact 102 years old and my brother 71 years old.

4/ With regard to the intense white light shining through the gap under the door, there has always been about a 10mm gap there. If a vehicle parked outside its headlights could shine under. When I exited my room, I triggered my own approach alarm and this meant I was the only person or vehicle to do this over the time frame. If by chance someone or something did set the alarm off it would have reset itself after a certain period and a warning light would have indicated a previous activation, meaning I had had a visitor. This was not the case and the light I saw was too intense to have been created by any known means including a welding flash. I had thought such an intense light under the door would have shone right across the floor and if it was an external force why did it not shine through the windows as well. I cannot explain the light's containment and am at a loss to explain its origin. It could have been the beginning of the so called light at the end of the tunnel and I must have fought with all my might to avoid entering the light, either that or my time was not up.

5/ I allude to a program on TV3's Campbell Live show some time ago about a man who it was said had died in hospital then come back to life hours later. The segment was widely advertised on TV3 prior to screening and viewers were led to believe what happens when a person crosses over to the other side would be revealed. The item proved to be something of a disappointment as when the crunch came for the big question to be answered the interviewee only stated that out of respect for his dead brother he did not wish to comment. The man only said one more thing and that was he did not remember having an out of body experience. The fact that he said he had met a dead relative led me to assume that he was in the same transition stage as when I met mine. I do not know whether every person has an out of body experience when they approach death or enter the first stage. I remember that this person acted in a zombie like fashion when he was questioned and still appeared to be very scared. I have communicated with the Campbell Live program stating that I had experienced a similar phenomena and asked whether it would be possible for them to put me in contact with this person, and still await a reply.

6/ I do not know the difference or if there is one, between a near death experience or and out of body experience, nor did I experience the common expression of having my whole life flash before my eyes. I feel this sensation might be more evident in the case of violent, accidental or trauma close shaves with death.

7/ With reference to the feeling experienced when I was falling then left my body, I cannot account for it or describe it any further than I have.

8/ I feel I can categorize the whole experience into three parts:

(a) Unconsciousness or coma, heart stops but brain still active, able to be resuscitated, leading to out of body experience and clinically dead, but not legally brain stem dead.

(b) Enters second transition stage, still ostensibly dead, at which point phenomena of environment and seeing dead relatives etc. occurs. Can still survive from this stage, brain still active, called to either make the decision to return or proceed, or have the decision made for you by unknown phenomena.

(c) The point of no return is the intense light; once this is entered there is no return, brain stem death and finality.

9/ With regard to the cause of unconsciousness and subsequent experiences I have ruled out hallucination because of the unknown length of the event, also I feel none of the prescription drugs I take, like for blood pressure, cholesterol, and stroke are capable of causing same.

10/ I have also ruled out the calcified meningioma as a cause to render me unconscious, as can happen with a malignant tumor and the most probable cause was a stroke. An MRI identified a brain stem lesion, which seems to indicate a stroke. This has affected my legs and the way I walk and I feel the need to sit down whenever possible. People do not seem to understand that this is an after effect of a TIA and is an idiosyncratic neurological disorder.

11/ I have rejected the theory that the whole episode might have been a bad dream, a nightmare even. I dream like everyone else but minutes after awakening the dream is forgotten. The whole episode experienced by myself seems to have etched itself permanently on my brain. I can move it to the subconscious by occupying myself with other matters or I can recall it at will and it is ever present and is always the same, never differing in any detail. For myself to complete this statement it did, however, take a number of days to extract as much information as I could for the detail provided and I have repeatedly gone over and over this whole statement.

12/ I am not a religious person, quite the opposite, and I have no intention of turning to what I call the superstition of the masses to find the answers. What I experienced I do not believe to be a religious experience, it was a paranormal phenomenon.

13/ It is now obvious that in order to come to terms with my experience I should converse with others who have made similar claims and compare their experiences with my own. Almost certainly, my own experience is not an isolated one and different people might have experienced different phenomena under different circumstances. It would also be interesting to find out how the experience has effected other people's lives. The more people you can get to attest to these experiences the more credible they are. I would like to see a study group or a survivors group set up so effected persons can talk about their experiences to each other and probably the best way to initiate this is to seek publicity through the press or post a page on the internet, but I have no means of doing the internet part.

14/ This statement was first printed on 15th December 2009 and submitted to Dr Mary Murray and the Manawatu Standard soon after. It was reprinted with some small alterations to format on 26th December 2009.




ON THE THRESHOLD OF DEATH


LIFE AFTER THE NEAR-DEATH

TREVOR L JAMES



TABLE OF CONTENTS



ONE The experience

TWO The aftermath

THREE Coming to terms

FOUR The quest for knowledge

FIVE Going public

SIX Dealing with the publicity

SEVEN Where to now?



Foreward

The words 'Into the shadow of the valley of death rode the valiant six hundred' from the Charge of the Light Brigade during the Crimean War, spring to mind as but one anecdote to describe my near-death experience on March 19th 2007. On the threshold of death is another. It was probably as close as one might wish to come to death, and yet, if I was called I would willingly go there again, it was so.beautiful.is the only way to describe what I felt. Somehow, I often felt cheated that I did not enter the 'being of light' as described by many who have had a similar experience, for I was not completely on the brink, but the decision not to proceed into the light was probably made for me, as it was not my turn, and I should be grateful for that.

Many experiencers report entering the tunnel and seeing the light then, however no two experiences are exactly the same. I am now certain that when I felt the sensation of falling, I was in fact in a tunnel but I did not know that at the time, and the light I experienced was only a thin sliver contained on the other side of my door. I have tried to categorize the three stages or transitions of the whole experience, and believe I was in the second stage. I might have even been temporarily clinically dead. Many enter the third stage and survive. It was a truly wonderful experience and one that I will never forget.

Trevor James

February 2010

ONE

The experience

The nineteenth of March 2007 was a Monday and there was a new moon on that date. I know, because I later looked up moon phases on 'Astrofinder' computer software and punched in that date. But for reasons that will be disclosed, I had not recorded the moon and sun distances and weather details on my computer log for that day, which was something I did last thing at night. There was nothing particularly significant or out of the ordinary on that Monday. I did the things I would normally do in a routine sort of way. I did not feel any different as I prepared for bed around 9.30pm that night. I can only assume that about this time I must have suddenly felt ill, lain on my bed and became unconscious.

At some stage during the ensuing timeframe I experienced a sensation of falling. It was not a tumbling sensation but like a skydiver in free fall and very frightening. It seemed to go on for an undeterminable period of time, then the falling stopped and I felt myself leave my own body through the navel area after which I was floating at the ceiling of a room so that I was looking down on this environment. I recall looking over and noticed my legs were suspended horizontal to the ceiling. The room was small and its decor a misty grey and I was immediately embraced by an overwhelming sense of peace, tranquility, serenity and silence and the lack of any fear and pain. It was the most beautiful feeling I had ever experienced. I also had this feeling of intense gratification. There was a person lying on a bed who was covered in a grey sheet which was folded down to the shoulders and the head of the person was supported by two thin pillows so that the weight of the head on the pillows caused the middle of them to sink in and the outer edges to slightly flare up and out. I recognized the person lying on the bed as myself. I was in my own accommodation. My mouth and eyes were closed, my hair combed and a slight bulge in the sheet indicated my hands were clasped together at the waist. Apart from this, I was lying in the supine position. Everything in the room was a light misty grey except for a slightly orange colored light on one wall. But nothing seemed to be in proportion. Then there appeared at the side of the bed but standing back about six feet, three figures who were dressed in either mortuary or surgical gowns and caps and these figures were also swathed in misty grey and stood side by side in silence. The figure at the center of the three was taller than the other two and was a male. The figure at the left was a female and the one on the right was also a male. I recognized the female on the left as my mother who had died in 1983, and the male on the right as my father who had also died in 1983. The taller male in the middle I recognized as my brother who had died in 1994. In life, my mother was 5ft 6" tall and my father 5ft 9" but now my father appeared to be so emaciated that he was shorter than my mother who had almost retained her pre-death stature. My brother in life was 6ft 1" and was at least a head taller than the others were, though he had shrunk slightly.

The three figures had a strange, almost zombie like aura about them and looked very old, tired and haggard in appearance. All three stood and stared at myself lying on the bed for only a short time then they began to move their mouths open and shut in unison like goldfish and I realized they were trying to speak to me but I could hear no words. I did not know if they could see me floating or not but I could still see both them and myself from where I was. They then began to make hand gestures, also in unison, at myself as though they were beckoning me to follow them. It was then that I noticed that behind the three was a door and through the gap at the bottom of this door, I could see a most intense light. The light did not spill into the room where I was but was totally contained on the other side of the door except what I could see through the gap. It was the whitest light I had ever seen, much brighter than any light on earth, and yet it did not hurt my eyes. I was still floating at the ceiling all of this time as well. I was fascinated by the presence of this light, it was though it was a 'being' of some sort and it radiated everything that was good and I still experienced the same beautiful feelings. After a while the three figures turned and appeared to melt into and through the door. After that, I experienced nothing more until I regained consciousness and noticed I was still on my own bed. I was terribly confused.

TWO

The aftermath

All of a sudden, I realized I had witnessed my own death. I had left my physical body, met my dead family and encountered the light and for some reason I had returned. It was as though something or someone had determined that it was not my time to go and had sent me back. I did not know if I was really angry that I had been clutched back from death or was just scared. It was like I might have been in some sort of suspended animation or cataleptic state. There was very definitely the presence of some para-normal external force, some phenomena that I cannot explain. I just cannot account for that time frame or know for how long the experience lasted, and if I was called I knew I would willingly go there again, even if it meant entering the light and not returning. I realized that I was still clothed except for my shoes. I was very disorientated and still experienced this fear. I also noticed that I must have left a light on as a wall mounted incandescent light bulb still shone. There is no landline where I live and only very limited cell phone coverage. I managed to exit my room. I reside close to a railway line and upon venturing up the driveway I saw a railway worker who was about to enter a concrete bunker next to the line. There was a railways vehicle parked by the tracks as well. I called out to this person and said I thought I had had a stroke and could he call an ambulance, which he did. When the ambulance arrived I was sitting on the top step of my landing and still very shaken. I could not talk properly and had trouble communicating with them. I had my blood pressure taken twice with a short interval in between and was told it was quite low but rising, also my pulse was feeble but improving. One of the officers made mention about what he called my extremely white pallor and asked if I wanted to go to the hospital, to which I replied 'no' as I had no means of getting home again. One of them also made a comment as to why I chose to live where I did, and I could tell they were starting to get annoyed with me and asked me to make up my mind what I wanted to do as I was holding them up. After a couple of other precautionary tests they left. I could tell they really had no idea what was wrong with me. Then about five minutes later, they returned and said they were not happy with me and asked if I thought I had fallen into a diabetic coma. I replied that I did not but I was tested for blood / sugar level anyway which proved normal. It was nearly a week before I considered that I had returned to my normal being but the vivid memories of this event remain with me on a daily basis and although the fear has gone I am ever mindful that I must have been either very close to death or even dead at some stage, hence the out of body and near death experience. Now, if I look into my eyes in the mirror I think I can see a certain sadness, though what about I am not sure. I do know that this experience has had a lasting effect on myself and has driven me into an innate corner. I keep on thinking about the light as well and feel that finality is within the light and that if I had entered it I might not have returned.

THREE

Coming to terms

It has taken more than two years of thought to try and establish any logical reasoning for what I experienced and below I have set out my observations and conclusions in trying to explain certain aspects of the experience, yet I cannot explain or account for most of what happened in a physical sense. For much of this time I managed to contain the experience in my sub-conscious then a program on TV3 suddenly spurred me to seriously continue to pursue answers, and I also realized that I am not alone with this and there are other people out there who have experienced the same phenomena as myself. Almost every day for the past few, I have spent working on this booklet I keep on coming up with the same details of what happened and nothing has changed. The experience is permanently implanted. Once I had convinced myself I could not find any more answers I realized that certain phenomena had existed on that day and I could no longer continue to deny that fact. The experience had to come out into the open, I had to live with it, talk to others and accept it least I ran the risk of being consumed by it. Also, it is natural to think about death and dying and as we grow older the more this tends to happen. I do not recall ever preparing for sleep in my clothes. Perhaps I had felt ill, prior to preparing for sleep and drifted off. I was not covered by any sheet when I came to. I am certain the dim orange colored light I saw was in fact the wall mounted light left on in my accommodation. There is another light in the room opposite the dimmer one, but this is an energy saver type, gives off a whiter light and was not turned on. Meeting my family as described meant that my parents were in fact 102 years old and my brother 71 years old. With regard to the intense white light shining through the gap under the door, there has always been about a 10mm gap there. If a vehicle parked outside its headlights could shine under. When I exited my room I triggered my own approach alarm and this meant I was the only person or vehicle to do this over the time frame. If by chance someone or something did set the alarm off it would have reset itself after a certain period and a warning light would have indicated a previous activation, meaning I had had a visitor. This was not the case and the light I saw was too intense to have been created by any known means including a welding flash. I had thought such an intense light under the door would have shone right across the floor and if it was an external force why did it not shine through the windows as well. I cannot explain the light's containment and am at a loss to explain its origin. It could have been the beginning of the so called light at the end of the tunnel and I must have fought with all my might to avoid entering the light, either that or my time was not up.

I allude to a program on TV3's Campbell Live show some time ago about a man who it was said had died in hospital then come back to life hours later. The segment was widely advertised on TV3 prior to screening and viewers were led to believe what happens when a person crosses over to the other side would be revealed. The item proved to be something of a disappointment as when the crunch came for the big question to be answered the interviewee only stated that out of respect for his dead brother he did not wish to comment. The man only said one more thing and that was he did not remember having an out of body experience. The fact that he said he had met a dead relative led me to assume that he was in the same transition stage as when I met mine. I do not know whether every person has an out of body experience when they approach death or enter the first stage. I remember that this person acted in a zombie like fashion when he was questioned and still appeared to be very scared. I have communicated with the Campbell Live program stating that I had experienced similar phenomena and asked whether it would be possible for them to put me in contact with this person, and still await a reply. I do not know the difference or if there is one, between a near death experience or and out of body experience, nor did I experience the common expression of having my whole life flash before my eyes. I feel this sensation might be more evident in the case of violent, accidental or trauma close shaves with death.

With reference to the feeling experienced when I was falling then left my body, I cannot account for it or describe it any further than I have, but I feel I can categorize the whole experience into three parts:-

Unconsciousness or coma, heart stops but brain still active, able to be resuscitated, leading to out of body experience and clinically dead, but not legally brain stem dead.

Enters second transition stage, still ostensibly dead, at which point phenomena of environment and seeing dead relatives etc. occurs. Can still survive from this stage, brain still active, called to either make the decision to return or proceed, or have the decision made for you by unknown phenomena.

The point of no return is the intense light; once this is entered there is no return, brain stem death and finality.

With regard to the cause of unconsciousness and subsequent experiences, I have ruled out hallucination because of the unknown length of the event, also I feel none of the prescription drugs I take, like for blood pressure, cholesterol, and stroke are capable of causing same. I have also ruled out the calcified meningioma as a cause to render me unconscious, as can happen with a malignant tumor and the most probable cause was a stroke. Later on, an MRI identified a brain stem lesion, which seems to indicate a stroke. This has affected my legs and the way I walk and I feel the need to sit down whenever possible. People do not seem to understand that this is an after effect of a TIA and is an idiosyncratic neurological disorder. I have rejected the theory that the whole episode might have been a bad dream, a nightmare even. I dream like everyone else but minutes after awakening the dream is forgotten. The whole episode experienced by myself seems to have etched itself permanently on my brain. I can move it to the subconscious by occupying myself with other matters or I can recall it at will and it is ever present and is always the same, never differing in any detail. For myself to complete the original statement it did, however, take a number of days to extract as much information as I could for the detail provided and I have repeatedly gone over and over this whole statement.

I am not a religious person, quite the opposite, and I have no intention of turning to what I call the superstition of the masses to find the answers. What I experienced I do not believe to be a religious experience, it was a para--normal phenomena. It is now obvious that in order to come to terms with my experience I should converse with others who have made similar claims and compare their experiences with my own. Almost certainly, my own experience is not an isolated one and different people might have experienced different phenomena under different circumstances. It would also be interesting to find out how the experience has affected other people's lives. The more people you can get to attest to these experiences the more credible they are. I would like to see a study group or a survivors group set up so effected persons can talk about their experiences to each other and probably the best way to initiate this is to seek publicity through the press or post a page on the internet, but I have no means of doing the internet part.



FOUR

The quest for knowledge

More than two years after the experience the memory of it was still as vivid as it had ever been. I had attempted to find answers but could not come up with any. I searched as deep as I could, to no avail, and the more I thought about the experience the more curious I became. I wanted answers, if not, then reassurances that I was not alone out there. I had not previously known about what I had experienced, but I knew it was a very significant happening. I had heard of course the saying that my whole life flashed before my eyes as described by a person having a close shave with death, but had no idea of the event being described as a near death experience' or an 'out of body experience until I began to think again of the episode on TV3 early in 2009, and the interviewee who had hedged at the last moment when faced with describing what it was like to cross over. Now I could put a label on my experience, and spurred by the TV episode wrote first to the Campbell Live program then the Vice Chancellor of Massey University. In the letter to the Campbell program, I mentioned the hesitancy of the interviewee when posed with the difficult question, mentioned I had had a similar experience and asked whether they could put me in contact with that person. Regrettably, I never received a reply from them. In the letter to Massey, I mentioned the TV episode, the fact that I also had had a similar experience along with questions regarding any academics that might have had an interest in the subject of this phenomena and if any research had ever been carried out. Then, to my mild astonishment, a reply came back from the personal assistant to the Vice Chancellor stating that my letter had been circulated around departments and a Dr Mary Murray, who was a senior lecturer in sociology, had indicated an interest in meeting and talking with me. Little did I know it then, but my whole life was about to change for the better. Buoyed by a new kind of enthusiasm, I put the finishing touches to the statement I had meticulously prepared, and put copies of this and other letters written onto disc which I would take with me on my initial appointment at Massey with Dr Murray. I had always had this inherent ability to write letters and short articles, in my earlier days I had reported on motor racing for a magazine and became the editor of a car club newsletter also that of an astronomical society. I had this propensity for going into the most minute detail in what I was writing about, the articles were often described as protracted but informative and more often than not the editor might have needed his own editor on more than one occasion.

At the first meeting, I tentatively proffered my written statement of events, hoping that Dr Murray might read this first, however when she said: 'Trevor, tell me what happened,' I launched into a unrehearsed and relieved narrative about what I now knew to be my near death experience. We could have talked for hours. As it turned out, Mary had a keen interest in death and the dying and was hoping to put the wheels into motion using the resources of Massey that would enable her to conduct research into this and other phenomena in the New Year. Eventually, as our conversation progressed, I let it be known that whether there was a certain irony attached to the fact or not, I had worked most of my life in the funeral industry as an embalmer. I had seen death from both sides, I had been scared after the experience but eventually this subsided. It was not a fear of death, this had gone, I think it was because at the time of regaining consciousness I was frightened for my very survival, not of the experience, or the fact that I thought I had been very close to death or even actually died for s short time. In the most part this had been the most wonderful and beautiful experience I had ever had.

FIVE

Going public

I had this almost insatiable thirst for knowledge. I began to read books Mary had loaned me on the subject of near death experiences which had been researched and published in the UK only around 30 years hence and was amazed at the depth of the published material. It was of some consolation to learn that literally thousands of people world- wide had had similar experiences, no two were exactly the same, some did not report having an out of body experience or meeting dead relatives, but all mentioned coming up against or meeting what was widely described as the being of light and being told it was not their turn and that they must go back. Also described was the impact the experiences had on people, many reported life-changing effects. I was adamant that I had to talk to other experiencers and the best way to do this was to enlist the help of the press. In other words, I was willing to expose my experience to the general public in the hope that others would then come forward. I wrote letters to three mainstream newspapers, the NZ Herald, the Dominion Post and the Manawatu Evening Standard, and within a few days, a voice mail message was left on my phone. Janine Rankin, a journalist with the Standard had responded and an interview date was set for December 17th. I was also asked whether I minded if she brought a photographer along to which I replied not at all.

I had told no-one at the club where I resided as caretaker about the impending visit from the press and was anxious that no publicity was afforded to the club. The interview must remain between me and the journalist and photographer. So I decided to talk to one of the members who were on site the night before the interview, as I had in fact invited the press onto the property of a private society. I had decided to break the subject to this person in such a way that he would not think I was suffering from any delusions and was in fact very serious about the whole experience. I broached the subject as carefully as possibly. The conversation went as follows:

Dave, have you ever felt that there was certain phenomena out there that could not be explained?

Like how do you mean?

: Have you ever heard of people having their whole life flash before their eyes, for instance? When they had a close shave with death.

Yes

Well, I had a funny experience just over two years ago, I saw things, witnessed my own death, things like that.

Was that when you were crook, and we were keeping an eye on

you?

Yes. It was some sort of near death experience; you are the first person I have told. The newspaper (local) wants to talk to me about it, and I don't want the club involved, photos, that sort of thing.

I don't see a problem with that. Talk to them at your galley.

They are coming tomorrow.



I don't really know what Dave thought, except that he knew I was not loopy or anything. Interestingly enough, when I was talking to him later about animals and their heightened senses over ours, he did mention that his father had a dog, and when his father died at home, suddenly the dog refused absolutely to ever enter the house again. It was as if the dog had sensed something had happened to his master, or had felt something at the time of death. I told him that was the sort of phenomena I was talking about.

I had expected a bit of a grilling from the press considering the unusual nature of the topic but this was not to be the case. Janine and photographer Jonathan Cameron duly arrived and the interview began. As usual, I had prepared a copy of the original statement plus copies of other letters written, to make life a bit easier. Then they asked to see where the experience had taken place and I was able to take them to my galley, or cabin as most people would know it. Inside, the photographer had me sit on my bed while he took a series of photos close up. And then it was all over. Janine promised to txt me when the article would appear, and in a parting shot also said that I should realize I would be plastered all over the paper. I was happy with that, but did not realize at the time the extent to which this would happen; the exact location where I lived would not feature, nor had I been asked what I had done for a living. I received a txt the next day, being the 18th December, saying that the article would be in that evening's paper.

As I rode down to the nearest paper shop later on that Friday afternoon I knew that I would feature on the front page of the paper, I had a sort of vision about it, and could see my photo on the front page. This proved to be true as when I reached for the papers on the display rack I caught a brief glimpse of the front page. The way the papers were folded showed the yellow on the back wall of my galley, and part of my right elbow. I selected three copies and when I went to pay for them the shop owner looked straight at me but said nothing. I looked straight back at him, and I knew that he knew it was me on the front page. Upon reaching home, I was able to unearth the full extent of the article.

There was this huge picture, in color and measuring 26cm by 19cm of me sitting on my bed, but not only that. The photo also took in the best part of that section of my living quarters as well, clearly showing all my radio and weather station equipment along with my collection of kitset battleships on the shelf at my rear. The photo also captured the exact time the shutter clicked as 10-49 clearly showed up on the weather station. I felt the photo to be intrusive to start with, because of what it disclosed, but that was what the photographer had wanted, a picture of where it had all happened, and I did say to them at the very beginning that I was an open book; nothing would be hidden or not told. At the top of the photo was the caption :-



DEATH SURVIVOR

and underneath the photo ran the words:- Back home: Trevor James is still trying to make sense of what happened when his conscious mind left his body. The whole article was emblazoned over at least a good third of the front page on that Friday. Full contents of the article are as follows:



NEAR-DEATH CONTINUES TO INTRIGUE

The person lying on the bed was covered in a grey sheet folded down to his shoulders. His mouth and eyes were closed, his hair was combed and it looked like his hands were clasped together at his waist. From his vantage point, floating near the ceiling, Trevor James realized that he was looking at his own body. Three figures dressed in surgical or mortuary gowns and caps, swathed in misty grey, appeared in the room. Mr. James recognized them as his long-dead parents and brother. They stared at the figure on the bed, their mouths opened but there was no sound. They beckoned. Mr. James was entranced by the sliver of brilliant white light he could see in the gap at the bottom of the door. He did not move toward it, and after a while, the figures melted away. Mr. James woke up alive the next morning. He was wearing the clothes he lay down in the previous evening. The sense of great peace and harmony had gone. He was disorientated and afraid. There was no landline where he was living on the outskirts of Feilding, so he managed to stumble out and call for help. The ambulance came. His vital signs were very low, his pallor deathly white. The eventual medical explanation was that he had had a stroke. Two years on the 69 year old has tried to explain away the experience, but can't.

Mr James' meticulous recounting of his near death experience fascinates Massey University senior lecturer in sociology Mary Murray, whose special interest is in death and dying. She wants to interview more New Zealanders who have similar stories to tell, and is waiting for ethics committee approval to make a start on the research. There are lots of different explanations for the phenomenon, but nobody knows for sure Overseas research projects were trying to build understanding about states of unconsciousness that could induce the sort of experience Mr. James described. She had explored literature that canvassed ideas about the role endorphins might play in prompting out-of-body experiences, what happened to the brain under anesthesia, and what role culture and religious belief played in peoples experience of near death. She said until people started talking about the phenomenon more openly, living with the memory could be a lonely business for people like Mr. James. Some reported it had a profound effect on their lives.

By Janine Rankin





The scene of experience or SOE

Above is a photo similar to the one taken by Manawatu Standard photographer Jonathan Cameron, but is from further back. I was floating near where the mirror is at top right so that I could see both myself lying on the bed on which the two red cushions sit, and which is partially obscured by the blue and white chair, and my dead relatives who were standing about where the yellow chair is. I thought the story to be very good, it was largely made up of parts of my own written statement and explanations and conclusions from Mary, who had obtained permission from her ethics committee to talk to the press. Naturally, I would be instantly recognized by those who knew me personally, and the first sign of this came from a check-out operator I had known for some years. I was in the check-out next to hers and right opposite. This lady looked over and acknowledged my presence, and then she said in a normal voice but which rose over two check-outs.

I didn't know you were a star. Are you all right, dear? I saw you in the paper.

Slightly embarrassed, I assured her that I was all right, and also that I was still alive. And I made a low key but never the less hasty exit from the supermarket after that. To this day, every time this lady serves me at her check-out she asks me if I am OK. Later on there was another instance when I was in public and was questioned about the article on myself. This time, even though the questions came out suddenly, I felt I was better equipped to handle the situation, which will be described later.

I had previously asked the journalist that with regard to any responses from the public could she advise readers of a box number at her paper they could write to, and fortunately at the end of the article the post box number of the Manawatu Standard for readers to correspond to the editor was printed. I also phoned Mary to tell her we had both made the news in a big way, and she replied that now we were in trouble. It did not take long for several replies to come in. The newspaper was obviously also posted on the net as newspapers tend to be, some respondents had tracked down Mary's e-mail address and made contact, others had written to the paper's box number.

Because Mary had not yet applied to Massey for research approval from her ethics committee, she could not talk to any respondents on a research basis, but this did not stop her from talking on a non-research and personal basis. Return contact was made with those who had written to her, and I myself received a couple of names and addresses that I was keen to reply to. Christmas came and went, there was no mail and people were on holiday. I was eager to see if there were any more replies.

It is worthwhile noting that for some reason after the experience I decided that I wanted to be surrounded by bright colors. My accommodation had been painted a dull peach color on the outside with pastels on the inside. Before the winter of 2007 had set in I had painted the outside a bright yellow with blues, yellows, reds and greys on the inside. The bright colors transformed the galley and also myself. Of course, at that time I had yet to make contact with the people I later did, and the experience was still ever present in my mind, but for some reason I knew what I wanted to do with the decor. I also coined a new acronym, SOE, which stood for scene of experience.





The galley or cabin occupied by myself as caretaker.

� After the NDE I wanted to be surrounded by bright colours.�



SIX

Dealing with the publicity

Naturally, I was a bit anxious how people I associated with at the club would react, and on the night of the publication I was having a few drinks with three others. All I could think about was the article and wondered if any of them had seen the paper, finally, I just wanted to return to the peace of my galley, and I kept on thinking about how I would divulge the splash of publicity to them. I called them on the radio and said that I had left a copy of that nights newspaper on the chair on the landing, I was splashed all over the front page and I did not want to talk about the contents that night as I was still a bit funny about it. That went down fine with them, and the next day there were indifferent comments about it. The most intelligent conversation I later entered into was with an eighteen year old and I gave him a copy of my statement to read, hoping that he would better understand what I had gone through. I was a bit worried whether those three would talk to others who might not seem so sympathetic, but I engaged in no further conversation about the experience until I went for a haircut in town, and the hairdresser whom I had known for over fifteen years suddenly launched into the topic of the newspaper article.

The following is almost verbatim:

A few weeks ago someone stole all the newspapers, you couldn't get one anywhere.

What, the Feilding Herald or the Standard?

The Standard. It was you. I thought the next time I saw you I was going to give you gyp.

Oh, yes.

I only read the first part of it, but I recognized you. What was it like?

A bit scary, not to be recommended, but it was OK too.

I've never given a haircut to a corpse before. Did you see angels with wings?

No, it was not a religious experience.

What was it like down there? Did you come back for a hundred year check-up or something?

Nah.

Did they get you back? (meaning the ambulance)

No, I came back myself, it wasn't my time. I must have actually died, I think. But the thing that worried me most was that I couldn't get a haircut where I was. (laughter0

I've never seen a corpse ride a scooter before. See you next time.

Yeah, thanks Terry.

Even though I knew Terry had meant the whole thing to be in the lighter vein, I thought I gave as good as I got in that interlude. It was obvious that he really did not know what it was all about, and why would he admit to only reading the first part of the article? Could he see what it was leading up to and refused to admit to himself that these sorts of phenomena actually happen? I was a bit indignant though, hearing mention of down there. I don't know why he supposed that I had gone down there, meaning hell, perhaps. I had always thought that the definitions of heaven and hell were superstitions of those who believed in that sort of thing. I feel sure that upon my next visit to the salon, this conversation will continue intelligently and I will have a better opportunity to fully explain what happened.

SEVEN

Where to now?

The search for knowledge and answers will continue, and this could be the basis of the first serious research into NDE's in New Zealand. I want to be part of that research; talk to other experiencers, encourage them to come out into the open; make them realize they are not alone out there; the quest may be never ending, but understanding and acceptance of this phenomenon will be greatly enhanced as a result. This year, I can envisage great strides being made because of Dr Murray's research, and this will surely open up much debate from various fields of science. There will always be detractors. Before my own experience, I never entertained the existence of any such phenomenon surrounding impending death, let alone the thought I might experience the same myself. I always thought death was like going under a general anesthetic lights out, then nothing. There may have been a spirit that left our physical body and continued on in another plane, but I thought that might be religious doctrine. Now, I really do not know what I believe. All I know is that there is a sort of something.

It is hoped that readers will have gained a better understanding of NDE and OOB (near death and out of body) experiences which have been recorded in some shape or form well before year one and the very cradle of civilization. Some experiencers may claim that they had met their creator and their beliefs had been further strengthened; for those who do not believe perhaps it is best to just accept that certain phenomenon exist out there and leave it at that. We may never know exactly what causes them and why. The curious amongst us may continue to delve deeper and deeper; scientists, philosophers, religious leaders and sceptics will no doubt have their theories too. Those who have experienced could very well say that their pathway into the being of light was but a transition from life to death, that there is life after death and it is beautiful; indiscriminately full of peace and harmony, no pain, wondrous colors, reunited at last with those they loved and whom had passed over, and it is like they were in a second universe. There is no turning back; all of us will end up wherever it is that we eventually go after we die. One mystery prevails for me; who or what makes the decision within the light for some to go back to whence they came, or others to proceed, and why? Also, I have no recollection of time and for how long the experience lasted. Only those who have gone beyond know. It is a whole new frontier for us.

Background Information:

Gender: Male

Date NDE Occurred: 19th March 2007

NDE Elements:

At the time of your experience, was there an associated life-threatening event? Yes Later assessment revealed a stroke had occurred Other Sudden state of unconsciousness, lasting 14 hours Period of unconsciousness appears to be related to a stroke

How do you consider the content of your experience? Wonderful

The experience included: Out of body experience

Did you feel separated from your body? Yes I clearly left my body and existed outside it

How did your highest level of consciousness and alertness during the experience compare to your normal everyday consciousness and alertness? Less consciousness and alertness than normal I am not sure

At what time during the experience were you at your highest level of consciousness and alertness? I am uncertain

Were your thoughts speeded up? Incredibly fast

Did time seem to speed up or slow down? Everything seemed to be happening at once; or time stopped or lost all meaning I was unconsciousness for 14 hours, but in hindsight my timing of the experience would seem to be 20 seconds

Were your senses more vivid than usual? Incredibly more vivid

Please compare your vision during the experience to your everyday vision that you had immediately prior to the time of the experience. The surroundings and figures I met were shrouded in misty grey. There was no other color except grey, and the light

Please compare your hearing during the experience to your everyday hearing that you had immediately prior to the time of the experience. I felt as though I had no hearing. My deceased relatives were mouthing something to me, but I could not hear what they were saying

Did you seem to be aware of things going on elsewhere? Yes, and the facts have been checked out

Did you pass into or through a tunnel? Yes I felt as though I was falling through a tunnel

The experience included: Presence of deceased persons

Did you see any beings in your experience? I actually saw them

Did you encounter or become aware of any deceased (or alive) beings? Yes They were standing in the same room as me, but just back from my bed - about 6 feet. At this time, I was floating at the ceiling, so I was looking down at both myself [on the bed] and them. Yes, I knew them - they were my deceased parents and brother. I could not hear what they were saying, but they were beckoning me with their hands to come to them

The experience included: Void

The experience included: Darkness

The experience included: Light

Did you see, or feel surrounded by, a brilliant light? A light clearly of mystical or other-worldly origin

Did you see an unearthly light? Yes It was a light under a crack in the door - the gap being about 10mm. The light was fully contained on the other side of the door, and it did not shine into the room. It was a very bright, white light. I felt as though it had a magnetic element about it, and it had the effect of wanting to draw me in

Did you seem to enter some other, unearthly world? A clearly mystical or unearthly realm The room that I was floating in appeared to be un-dimensional or out of it's usual dimensions. It appeared much larger than what it is in real-life

The experience included: Strong emotional tone

What emotions did you feel during the experience? The whole experience felt wondrous and most beautiful...very hard feeling to describe.

Did you have a feeling of peace or pleasantness? Incredible peace or pleasantness

Did you have a feeling of joy? incredible joy

Did you feel a sense of harmony or unity with the universe? I felt united or one with the world

Did you suddenly seem to understand everything? Everything about the universe

Did scenes from your past come back to you? My past flashed before me, out of my control

Did scenes from the future come to you? Scenes from the world's future

Did you come to a border or point of no return? I came to a barrier that I was not permitted to cross; or was sent back against my will

God, Spiritual and Religion:


What was your religion prior to your experience? Liberal None

Have your religious practices changed since your experience? No

What is your religion now? Liberal None

Did you have a change in your values and beliefs because of your experience? No

Did you seem to encounter a mystical being or presence, or hear an unidentifiable voice? I encountered a definite being, or a voice clearly of mystical or unearthly origin

Did you see deceased or religious spirits? I actually saw them

Concerning our Earthly lives other than Religion:


During your experience, did you gain special knowledge or information about your purpose? No

Have your relationships changed specifically because of your experience? Yes I have become more isolated within my own self; prefer my own company, even though I do socialize on rare occasions. I have become focused inward.

After the NDE:


Was the experience difficult to express in words? No

Do you have any psychic, non-ordinary or other special gifts after your experience that you did not have before the experience? Yes I feel as though I have had the re-birth of certain gifts I possessed when I was younger, but subsequently lost as I got older

Are there one or several parts of your experience that are especially meaningful or significant to you? Yes...the floating and being able to see my own self and my dead parents. While I was floating all the good feelings came

Have you ever shared this experience with others? Yes It was two years before I shared my experience. The first person I spoke in depth was Dr Mary Murray, and she was interested and receptive. I think she was influenced, and fascinated by my meticulous reporting of the event

Did you have any knowledge of near death experience (NDE) prior to your experience? No

What did you believe about the reality of your experience shortly (days to weeks) after it happened? Experience was definitely real I knew that something had happened, I wasn't sure what, but I knew it was a very significant paranormal event

What do you believe about the reality of your experience now? Experience was definitely real Because it is permanently etched on my consciousness, and I constantly think about the experience, trying to evaluate certain aspects of it, and I continuously keep offering theories about what happened, how and why. In particular, the 14 hour time frame where I cannot account for anything. I am certain that I must have been either dead or very close to death at some stage during that time frame.

At any time in your life, has anything ever reproduced any part of the experience? No

Is there anything else that you would like to add about your experience? DISCUSSION PAPER 2 MARCH 10 THE NDE AND THE �POLAR BEAR STATE� AND OTHER THEORIES

Sudden infant death syndrome

Cot death is a phenomenon � if breathing stops and is discovered in time by a monitor then the baby suffers a near-death experience, but will not remember it at that age of 0 � 6 months. I believe most adults only have childhood memories back to the ages of four or five years, certainly not beyond four years, and then onl

y one or two specific memories. Time and space during the NDE As stated in discussion paper of 8 February 10, I feel the conscious mind and body leave the host together, meaning there are two bodies, one physical and one in spirit form, this being the absent one floating, which might account for my seeing part of my legs whilst in levitation? The vision of my dead body lying on the bed might also be a sign or premonition of an event yet to take place?

In an attempt to place a time frame on the experience I can only come up with the following estimation: leaving body and falling, around 10 seconds, the longest remembered part; floating, seeing dead relatives and taking into account their mouthing and beckoning, 1 second for each mouth opening, and 1 second for each beckoning, equals 6 seconds; seeing the light, say 3 seconds; relatives turning and melting through door, say another 3 seconds, equals a total of 22 seconds? It was quite a short experience as opposed to the duration of unconsciousness, and / or sleep recovery which I thought to be nearly 14 hours.

Arguments for the Polar Bear State and inherent durability

The time frame between the apparent end of the NDE and regaining consciousness leads me to consider the possibility that I entered a �polar bear state� of cataleptic endurance and that I thereafter fought by some means to return, or did so by due process of recovery, time being the greatest arbiter of that condition. A person like myself who suffered a CVA high enough on the scale to render unconsciousness of that duration and then recovered without having seriously pronounced disabilities, save for cerebral ataxia, is very fortunate indeed, and this could be in due in part to a high level of inherent durability. This could be further attributed to the fact that my father had 13 such accidents, the level and after effects of each one being only moderately more serious than the previous and from which he did not eventually and directly expire from, however they were indirectly attributable. I would also surmise that in the case of a cardiac arrest where the patient was attached to a heart monitor, the monitor could �flat-line� at an apparent cessation of vascular activity when in fact the heart still demonstrated a beat as low as five per minute, which would not register. This is entirely feasible and medically possible, and the reason why practitioners are bound to listen for any detectable heartbeat with a stethoscope for at least one minute before assuming death has occurred, as well as carrying out other death test procedures. So the body is able to survive in this un-detectable �hibernation� state for a given period of time, if there is still enough oxygen circulation to sustain that level of body shut-down without incurring brain damage, then ultimately, and by process, there is a return to normal function. To the observer then, no detectable heart beat means cessation of life, and the patient is therefore presumed dead. This could account for persons �coming to life again� in mortuaries several hours after being incorrectly pronounced dead. Reptiles and animals enter a hibernation state; for a polar bear this can be up to six months; and this cataleptic state along with the ultimate reversal of it, could be described as a phenomenon in its own right .I would argue that humans can also induce themselves into a similar state. Another example of the tenacious living being �fooling� the observer is when there is very real cardiac and vascular collapse, yet the body continues to respire in an heightened manner due to the lungs still receiving messages from the brain to do so. This is termed as automatic or nervous reaction and is an example of the cardiac, nervous, and respiratory systems separating and not being inter-connected.

I will argue therefore that the NDE�ers who also report an initial OBE have in fact suffered a temporary-death experience (TDE), based on clinical understanding of cardiac suspension. No heartbeat means no life

Reluctance of experiencers to divulge

Often the NDE experiencer does not realise what has really happened to them after the restoration of their normal conscious being, but what is very apparent is the crystal clearness of the event and the realisation that they had in fact had a very significant experience of some kind, it had a strong pre-eminence of death, albeit for a brief moment, and there remained an acute awareness of their own mortality. The experience can be more confusing when it is associated with the onset of a sudden medical misadventure as opposed to knowing one may be close to death anyway as a result of a terminal illness and the time had arrived. The NDE forms a very personal relationship with the sufferer, it can be very secretive, like an illicit liaison, It can be all consuming, threatening even, to the experiencer�s stability if it is allowed to.

I am convinced that the experiencer has to come out into the open about what happened before any life changing transformations can encompass them. It is more the understanding of the event and reaching out to others who have had similar experiences, or to those who know of such phenomenon and are trying to apply scientific reasoning to them, that then and only then, can the recipient expect to fully benefit from their own experience. The knowledge that this strange, same phenomenon has beset so many other people can be reassuring and installs in one�s self a sense of superiority over others who have not experienced an NDE or OBE, in as much as if the experience were a qualification of life then it is the highest

qualification obtainable, far over and above any other type of learning competency. There is a feeling of higher intelligence. And it is achieved in seconds rather than in a life time of learning. Only at the out-coming can the experiencer expect to have some degree of inner peace, and from that moment of outing onwards, the real learning and understanding begins. Gone is the persuasion that once told you not to talk to others, and the event is finally released from the inner sanctum.

DISCUSSION PAPER THE NEAR- DEATH EXPERIENCE POST EXPERIENCE REVISION OF CONCLUSIONS � 8 FEBRUARY 2010 From Trevor James

I will argue that the subject in a near-death experience is clinically dead and therefore temporarily dead after they have left their own body and remain so for the duration of the experience unless they enter the light and do not return. Clinically dead can be defined as having no heart beat or respiration and regardless that brain waves may cease seconds after the heart stops, the brain can survive in this state for at least four minutes without receiving supplies of oxygen and suffering any damage. When the subject leaves their body, their conscious mind leaves with it and remains attached for the duration of the experience during which time the conscious mind transmits information back to the inactive brain via some unknown means of remote or telepathic transmission. The absent mind is therefore able to relay messages back to the inactive brain by this unknown means, and this is how the experience is �read� then stored back into the brain upon the return to wakefulness. The state of clinical or temporary death remains until the subject re-enters their own body, whether this time frame is seconds or minutes. Re-entry can take place some time prior to the subject regaining consciousness, and there is only one experience recalled.

Those subjects who do not remember or say they had no sensation of leaving their body and initially found themselves in a tunnel heading towards a being of distant light and are confronted by dead relatives or friends and experience the wondrous feelings of self and environment, have in fact left their body without knowing. There are no visions or feelings and state of apparent death unless they have left their body along with their conscious mind, and those who are adamant they did not leave their body but had a near-death experience were not, in fact, clinically dead, only in a coma, unconscious state or in deep meditation.

The experience happens in �real time� not in the past or in the future, but now. Objects and persons seen in the experience correspond with how they are or would be in and on the day of the experience, therefore it must be that spirits of dead relatives do age, but the vision of your own dead body is seen as it would be represented in �real time� and would not be subjected to any age differentials.

The conscious mind does not leave the body alone without the entirety of the body also leaving. Therefore I submit that the near-death experience is in fact a state of temporary death, as long as the body and mind have departed the physical live being in a state of togetherness. The experiencer remains clinically dead until resuscitation occurs or they emerge from what I believe could be some sort of state of suspension, and upon wakening presents with vital signs similar to those apparent with coma or unconsciousness, or similar to an animal going into hibernation. I also believe that most experiences are only of relatively short duration and that time and space are immeasurable within this duration. The dimension or stage as described can be called the first interval whereby the subject is confronted with the decision to proceed or return, and if the being of light is entered this can be described as the second and final interval from which the experiencer can still return, but if the subject proceeds further into the light and confronts, then continues past the �barrier� of truth, then there is no return and only then does the mind separate from the body and the mind in spiritual form is released forever.

Light is energy and energy is a force, therefore the 'being of light' could be a physical force with an unknown element of attraction in it, not earthly but possibly cosmic in source. It seems few experiencers can recall re-entering their body, or the duration over which the experience occurred, but both the fear of death - and if this was not felt at the immediate onset then it becomes very evident immediately after - and the experience itself become very vivid memories. The fear of death is the fear of the unknown that lies beyond, not the actual process of dying itself and this has to be experienced only once in order that it does not return again. The fear experienced upon awakening is a shuddering realisation of how close one came to actually dying, along with a fear of desperation for survival. This fear subsides within a short period; however trepidations surrounding the method and timing of any subsequent potential threats of death can be apparent but are of far less intensity than those first experienced. Fear not death, but the hand of death.

The memory of the beauty of the experience without any fear remains etched forever, and often it can be some years before the subject divulges any aspect of the experience to anyone, if at all, never.

DISCUSSION PAPER 3 � 11 March 10

Presented by Trevor James

I will argue that although a person in advanced automatic breathing reflex is very obviously not going to recover, It serves to demonstrate, in an opposite way to the cataleptic or polar bear state, that a person in reflex can be clinically dead but still purport to be actually alive and breathing to the observer, due to that reflex state, more so if the breathing is regular and not too laboured, however the cardiac system must have collapsed in order that reflex is induced. At this stage the subject should have already left their own body. (Refer to accompanying story Death Odyssey).

In attempting to further qualify my theories I state that notwithstanding the medical cause, the NDE or TDE subject can be clinically and/or temporarily dead once their heart has stopped and their conscious mind has left their body, and for however long the experience lasts, and that they may be in either the cataleptic state or automatic reflex, if the latter is not too far advanced, and that they could be recoverable from this state if the subject is in a pre-emptive condition and not obviously too overdosed or organ damaged. Both states can be clinically or naturally induced, and a patient could survive in both induced coma or cataleptic states for an indefinite period, whether machine supported or not, but not from advanced auto reflex. Even after cardiac arrest and with spasmodic breathing the patient may be able to be stabilised by a heart-lung machine, but does not necessarily survive as a result.

I refer to my previous paper on irregular heartbeats that may not be detected � a person�s unconscious or conscious refusal to die is an extremely valuable and effective defence mechanism. As the body prepares to die a number of system and organ shutdowns occur. Inter-dependent systems can become independent and operate on their own. A very ill patient may breathe intermittently (Cheynes-Stokes breathing). Here, the rate of breathing slows down until it stops altogether for perhaps half a minute or so, only to restart at an increasing rate. Then the breathing slows down again and the cycle is repeated. During the breathing interval the observer may think that the subject has died.

This sort of breathing may last for days, the heart is still beating though and this condition cannot be confused for true automatic reflex because it is irregular. True automatic reflex breathing is entirely regular and ultimately compromised. In science, I feel that a stated theory may be deemed to be correct until another person disproves it, and the theorist may not have to prove a theory beyond absolute doubt. I will argue then, that my theories relating to the aforementioned subjects in all discussion papers and to those as experienced by myself, are irrefutable, and I invite anyone to debate disproval of them. Only another experiencer may be able to do this, and only if they possess the necessary analytical expertise and interpretations.

I also examine what significance the NDE has to events which may take place in the future, and firstly state that without a doubt the vision of myself lying dead on the bed was in fact a very real actual state of my being at the time, but it may also have been a premonition of a future event as well, and the meeting of dead relatives a ghostly visitation by them. The encounter with dead relatives is interesting in that there was no flicker of recognition, it was cold and impersonal and zombie like and not an open arms welcome like one might expect. I myself could not identify or separate from the wondrous feelings I experienced whilst floating, any feelings of love and joy at this meeting, yet the silent mouthing of words and brief gesticulations by them and their very presence in my room must have indicated some desire on their behalf for me to follow them. I cannot offer an explanation for this, other than to say I wanted to progress further but for some reason the decision not to was made by a force unbeknown to and unexplainable by myself, and in fact the whole experience was a supreme para-normal event, the understanding of which lends itself to much deliberation but which may never be fully realized. If the ability to do so existed, the truth would have been known long hence.

As I did not enter the light during my NDE I can form no theory as to whether there is any entity attached to NDE'ers reported voices heard from within, whether the voices were male or female in accordance with the sex of the experiencer, and whether there was any physical, albeit invisible but never-the-less felt, barrier at the so called point of no return. The ability of the experiencer to analyse their own event to such an extent as this is a very definite legacy of that para-normal event, and not something that the writer would have been able to do immediately post-experience. It is a progressive talent and a direct result of the experience.

Are there any other questions that we could ask to help you communicate your experience? No, I think you have covered it quite well