Experience Description

After going into my sister's room, I went onto the iPad. I started feeling my heart beat extremely fast. My body from the waist up started to hurt. I believe my head was hurting too but the pain was more my chest and stomach. The defibrillator was shocking me really fast. I knew I would pass out, so I sat on the bed. I knew my head would hit the headboard so I moved down on the bed and tried to lay down on the pillow. I started to get tunnel vision. Then I woke up. After about 10 minutes I was fine. I just thought I had fainted. I didn’t tell the doctor about it until months later. I was told that they didn’t see the arrythmia on the device when they reviewed it.

Then a week or so after this, I had a flashback. I remember being conscious. I was awake but without a body. I felt weightless. Although I didn't have my physical eyes, I could see. I had no worries, questions, or thoughts. I was in a dark place, like a void where time seem frozen. Oddly, it seemed full of life. My view was a bit grainy, like static on a TV, but it was black. I had 360 degree view of everything. For the first time, I could see clearly and far away without my glasses. It felt as if I was only a grain of sand in the infinite amount of grains that made up the 'void.' I felt as if each grain had consciousness. I understood what oneness was because I was a part of it, even if just for just that moment. I wasn’t scared; in fact, I felt more peaceful and calm than ever. I was just taking it all in. I should be terrified of this unknown and have a million questions running through my mind, but I didn't.

My young daughter was in her room sleeping. Yet, I didn’t think of her or question what would happen to her.

In January, I had a couple shocks from my defibrillator again. I had to do surgery to replace my old device and have pieces of my heart removed.

My dad didn’t believe me. I know a couple friends, who I told, look at me funny so I tried to forget about it.

I completely lost my fear of death.

I’ve had other weird experiences after this experience like seeing shadows and things of that nature, but for whatever reason, I can’t remember the rest of my time on the other side.

Background Information:

Gender: Female

Date NDE Occurred: 4/2/2015

NDE Elements:

At the time of your experience, was there an associated life-threatening event? Yes Heart attack. Other: Not sure what had happened, but when my defibrillator was replaced in January, they tried to question me. My heart started racing, chest and stomach started hurting so bad that my defibrillator started to shock me. Then, I went unconscious.

How do you consider the content of your experience? Entirely pleasant

Did you feel separated from your body? I lost awareness of my body

How did your highest level of consciousness and alertness during the experience compare to your normal everyday consciousness and alertness? More consciousness and alertness than normal. It’s hard to explain but the feeling like meditation at it’s finest while being fully aware of your surroundings. I probably would have notice more things but not much was happening in the void, that I remember.

At what time during the experience were you at your highest level of consciousness and alertness? It was like I popped up there and was very aware of my surroundings and just in the moment. I was more aware but without thoughts or questions.

Were your thoughts speeded up? No

Did time seem to speed up or slow down? Everything seemed to be happening at once; or time stopped or lost all meaning. Time seem to not exist. I had no idea of time there. I could not tell you if I was unconscious for a couple seconds, minutes, or more.

Were your senses More vivid than usual? Incredibly more vivid

Please compare your vision during the experience to your everyday vision that you had immediately prior to the time of the experience. For the first time in forever, I didn’t think about my glasses. If I hold my phone out at arm's length there is a red blue and black blur. But here, I was able to see extremely far despite the darkness. I had perfect vision

Please compare your hearing during the experience to your everyday hearing that you had immediately prior to the time of the experience. I didn’t notice anything about that. I could hear but there wasn’t anything to 'hear.'

Did you seem to be aware of things going on elsewhere, as if by ESP? No

Did you pass into or through a tunnel? Uncertain. I have no memories of it

Did you see any beings in your experience? No

Did you encounter or become aware of any deceased (or alive) beings? No

Did you see, or feel surrounded by, a brilliant light? No

Did you see an unearthly light? No

Did you seem to enter some other, unearthly world? A clearly mystical or unearthly realm. I was somewhere that was completely dark, yet so peaceful. It wasn’t in the room I became unconscious in.

What emotions did you feel during the experience? Peace, calm, and just being in the moment with no real emotion other feeling peaceful

Did you have a feeling of peace or pleasantness? Incredible peace or pleasantness

Did you have a feeling of joy? No

Did you feel a sense of harmony or unity with the universe? I felt united or one with the world

Did you suddenly seem to understand everything? Everything about the universe. There was life in the void. I felt like it had consciousness and I was apart of it, yet I was separate. I didn’t feel like another being was there, but I wasn’t questioning anything. That’s the only thing I felt I 'knew'.

Did scenes from your past come back to you? No

Did scenes from the future come to you? No

Did you come to a border or point of no return? No

God, Spiritual and Religion:

What was your religion prior to your experience? No comment. I grew up in a Christian home but I don’t believe in the Bible. I believe in a higher Power but not the god in the Bible.

Have your religious practices changed since your experience? Yes I do more believe in 'SOMETHING' but not sure what

What is your religion now? No comment. Same, I still believe in something higher but I would need to remember more of that 'time' before I could make a full decision.

Did your experience include features consistent with your earthly beliefs? Content that was entirely not consistent with the beliefs you had at the time of your experience. I thought when you die that’s it, but I was very much aware after I died.

Did you have a change in your values and beliefs because of your experience? Yes Over the years, like right now. I do feel that my experience popping in my mind, is a reminder that there’s more to life. I should be doing the things that my heart desires because life is short. One thing I feel like I have to do is helping animals It’s one thing I truly love and I’ll start my journey soon

Did you seem to encounter a mystical being or presence, or hear an unidentifiable voice? No

Did you see deceased or religious spirits? No

Did you encounter or become aware of any beings who previously lived on earth who are described by name in religions (for example: Jesus, Muhammad, Buddha, etc.)? No

During your experience, did you gain information about premortal existence? No

During your experience, did you gain information about universal connection or oneness? Uncertain It’s more about feeling oneness. I didn’t see anything to prove it

During your experience, did you gain information about the existence of God? No

Concerning our Earthly lives other than Religion:

During your experience, did you gain special knowledge or information about your purpose? No

During your experience, did you gain information about the meaning of life? No

During your experience, did you gain information about an afterlife? An afterlife does not exist. I would say 'yes' only because I still had consciousness. I’m sure I won’t be the only one but other than that, I didn’t see anything physically to prove it

Did you gain information about how to live our lives? No

During your experience, did you gain information about life's difficulties, challenges and hardships? No

During your experience, did you gain information about love? No

What life changes occurred in your life after your experience? Slight changes in my life. For the 2 previous question it’s about spiritual. After what I saw, I can’t help but feel we are here for a purpose. I no longer fear death. I think that’s the most important thing and I started noticing more paranormal things.

Have your relationships changed specifically because of your experience? Yes I can’t talk to people. I feel they judge me, so I cut a lot of people out my life

After the NDE:

Was the experience difficult to express in words? Yes Everything was based more off of how I felt. It’s hard to tell people about feelings without them thinking I'd lost my mind

How accurately do you remember the experience in comparison to other life events that occurred around the time of the experience? I remember the experience more accurately than other life events that occurred around the time of the experience. I have a really bad memory. I would say, this is this only thing I could go over detail by detail anytime from my life. 49 years from now, I can tell the same story

Do you have any psychic, non-ordinary or other special gifts after your experience that you did not have before the experience? Yes One day I saw a picture in my head of my uncle poking his head in my room, with his hand on the door. He NEVER did that before. My bed was messy, so I immediately threw a sheet over it. Seconds later, he did the same exact thing. The only difference was that I didn’t see that it was the dog that ran into the room who he was looking for. I said a couple more things that happened but when I would mention it to people they would look at me crazy, so I just push it to the side and stop thinking about them.

Have you ever shared this experience with others? Yes I told my dad maybe few months afterwards. He thought I was nuts. I told a couple of friends who said they see spirits but even they think I’m nuts. So, I don’t really share it much anymore

Did you have any knowledge of near death experience (NDE) prior to your experience? No

What did you believe about the reality of your experience shortly (days to weeks) after it happened? Experience was definitely real. I thought I passed out and I was just conscious while passed out. A few months to a couple years afterwards, I came across a NDE video and made the connection

What do you believe about the reality of your experience now? Experience was definitely real. It feels just as real as I am here writing this. If anything, that feels more real because I was more in the moment there

At any time in your life, has anything ever reproduced any part of the experience? No