Experience Description

I was in a research study at Yale New Haven hospital for women who had been successfully treated for post-partum depression. After my fourth daughter was born, I was put on Zoloft, an anti-depressant that helped me. Then when she was four and a half months old, I was asked to be in the research study. It caused me to feel light-headed, nauseous, and dizzy right afterwards. The next day I felt the same and I had taken my sister shopping for her birthday.

After I dropped her off and was driving home, I blacked out at the wheel. I ended up in the next lane and was hit head-on by a pick-up truck. I don't remember but I had to be cut out of the car and was rushed to a hospital. I had to have my ruptured spleen removed and exploratory surgery to examine other organs. I broke my right clavicle, which I had surgery on a few weeks later. I also broke three ribs, left fibula, and a bone in my right foot.

All I remember is seeing a bright light, which was 1,000 times brighter than the sun. The feeling I had as the rays shone down on me was of peace, love, serenity, like I was safe, I was home, and I belonged. It was awesome! Then I woke up in the hospital with staples down the front of me, getting a shot of morphine every 4 hours for 5 days and I was angry with GOD for a few years afterwards: to allow me to experience the splendor, and then send me back to be all messed up.

Background Information:

Gender: Female

Date NDE Occurred: 10/25/97

NDE Elements:

At the time of your experience, was there an associated life-threatening event? Yes Accident Clinical death (cessation of breathing or heart function or brain function) Car accident.

How do you consider the content of your experience? Both pleasant AND distressing

The experience included: Out of body experience

Did you feel separated from your body? No I clearly left my body and existed outside it

How did your highest level of consciousness and alertness during the experience compare to your normal everyday consciousness and alertness? More consciousness and alertness than normal It was just extremely intensified.

At what time during the experience were you at your highest level of consciousness and alertness? When I was under the bright light.

Were your thoughts speeded up? No

Did time seem to speed up or slow down? Time seemed to go faster or slower than usual It seemed like I was there only for a minute.

Were your senses more vivid than usual? More vivid than usual

Please compare your vision during the experience to your everyday vision that you had immediately prior to the time of the experience. It was wider and clearer.

Please compare your hearing during the experience to your everyday hearing that you had immediately prior to the time of the experience. I don’t remember my hearing.

Did you seem to be aware of things going on elsewhere? No

Did you pass into or through a tunnel? No

Did you see any beings in your experience? No

Did you encounter or become aware of any deceased (or alive) beings? No

The experience included: Unearthly light

Did you see, or feel surrounded by, a brilliant light? An unusually bright light

Did you see an unearthly light? Yes It was 1,000 times brighter than the sun.

Did you seem to enter some other, unearthly world? Some unfamiliar and strange place I believed it to be heaven.

The experience included: Strong emotional tone

What emotions did you feel during the experience? Peace, love, serenity, safe, wanted, and protected.

Did you have a feeling of peace or pleasantness? Incredible peace or pleasantness

Did you have a feeling of joy? incredible joy

Did you feel a sense of harmony or unity with the universe? I felt no longer in conflict with nature

Did you suddenly seem to understand everything? No

Did scenes from your past come back to you? No

Did scenes from the future come to you? No

Did you come to a border or point of no return? No

God, Spiritual and Religion:


What importance did you place on your religious/spiritual life prior to your experience? Slightly important to me

What was your religion prior to your experience? Christian- Protestant

Have your religious practices changed since your experience? Yes I attend a different church. It's exactly what I believed prior. GOD was the bright light I saw.

What importance do you place on your religious/spiritual life after your experience? Greatly important to me

What is your religion now? Christian- Protestant

Did your experience include features consistent with your earthly beliefs? Content that was entirely consistent with the beliefs you had at the time of your experience It's exactly what I believed prior.

Did you have a change in your values and beliefs because of your experience? Yes Nothing happens by accident and everything happens for a reason.

Did you seem to encounter a mystical being or presence, or hear an unidentifiable voice? No

Did you see deceased or religious spirits? No

Did you encounter or become aware of any beings who previously lived on earth who are described by name in religions (for example: Jesus, Muhammad, Buddha, etc.)? No

During your experience, did you gain information about premortal existence? No

During your experience, did you gain information about universal connection or oneness? No

Did you believe in the existence of God prior to your experience? God definitely exists

During your experience, did you gain information about the existence of God? Yes GOD was the bright light I saw.

Do you believe in the existence of God after your experience? God definitely exists

Concerning our Earthly lives other than Religion:


During your experience, did you gain special knowledge or information about your purpose? Yes I was clearly where my soul is going when I die, to be with GOD. GOD is love.

Did you believe that our earthly lives are meaningful and significant prior to your experience? Are probably meaningful and significant

During your experience, did you gain information about the meaning of life? No

Did you believe in an afterlife prior to your experience? An afterlife definitely exists

Do you believe in an afterlife after your experience? An afterlife definitely exists Yes I was clearly where my soul is going when I die to be with GOD.

Did you fear death prior to your experience? I slightly feared death

Do you fear death after your experience? I do not fear death

Were you fearful living your life prior to your experience? Moderately fearful in living my earthly life

Were you fearful living your life after your experience? Not fearful in living my earthly life

Did you believe that our earthly lives are meaningful and significant prior to your experience? Are probably meaningful and significant

Did you believe that our earthly lives are meaningful and significant after your experience? Are meaningful and significant

Did you gain information about how to live our lives? No

During your experience, did you gain information about life's difficulties, challenges and hardships? No

Were you compassionate prior to your experience? Slightly compassionate toward others

During your experience, did you gain information about love? Yes GOD is love.

Were you compassionate after your experience? Moderately compassionate toward others

What life changes occurred in your life after your experience? Large changes in my life Now that I'm no longer angry at God for not allowing me to stay with HIM, I realize that I have a testimony that HE wants me to share with others. Large changes in my life

Have your relationships changed specifically because of your experience? Yes Yes I have more respect for people.

After the NDE:


Was the experience difficult to express in words? No

How accurately do you remember the experience in comparison to other life events that occurred around the time of the experience? I remember the experience more accurately than other life events that occurred around the time of the experience It sticks out in my mind as one of the best experiences and feelings I've ever had.

Do you have any psychic, non-ordinary or other special gifts after your experience that you did not have before the experience? Yes I'm more sensitive to the Holy Spirit’s guiding.

Are there one or several parts of your experience that are especially meaningful or significant to you? That GOD chose me to experience that.

Have you ever shared this experience with others? Yes The first time was probably a month or so afterward. They seemed shocked with some disbelief. Now I share it regularly and I get welcomed responses.

Did you have any knowledge of near death experience (NDE) prior to your experience? No

What did you believe about the reality of your experience shortly (days to weeks) after it happened? Experience was definitely real I was angry and wanted to go back. I cried a lot.

What do you believe about the reality of your experience now? Experience was definitely real To share my testimony with others who might not believe.

At any time in your life, has anything ever reproduced any part of the experience? Yes Injecting cocaine and heroin into my veins.

Is there anything else that you would like to add about your experience? As a result of the car accident, I became addicted to the pain medication I was prescribed: became a heroin addict, lost my home, my marriage, my children, went to jail and became homeless. I am now in recovery and I believe GOD wanted me to experience that, also, so I can relate to ALL people and have no prejudice against anyone. It sticks out in my mind as one of the best experiences and feelings I've ever had.