Experience Description

I drifted out of my body and suddenly was pulled thought a tunnel of light. I passed thought it in less than the blink of an eye. Suddenly I was floating in a dark warm safe place. I heard voices from beneath me and could see titans doing what I could not see. They were speaking a strange language and bathed in orange light. Somehow, I knew them and felt safe with them. On my left there was a woman floating, like I was I could not see her head or hands and she was clothed in robes that had the colors of the earth and more in them. After being there for a long time, I looked at her and wondered what she would feel like in my arms. She then let me see some of what she was. I had no idea such power could exist. In the terror that only a child can feel, I began to fall downward streaming and clawing at the air. I saw that if she ever made a mistake with her hidden tasks, I could be destroyed. Even in soul worlds, I could cease to be with a small mistake on her part. I saw her hand far below form and as I got closer, I could see her fingerprints were mountains - trees and snow covered them, as I neared all I could see was the landscape. Suddenly, I was stopped and suspended above the ground. Her finger appeared above me and she began filling me with something that I couldn't identify. It was overwhelmingly wonderful but soon I felt as if I would burst and became frightened. Then it stopped. I, after much thought, identified what she was filling me up with was tenderness.

I am a creature of guilt if someone falls down near me it was my fault as I should have moved faster to help them. She knew that. I began to see every act of mine that helped another. First through my own eyes, many of which I had long forgotten and nothings. Then from inside the person or animal that I had helped. Then through all of the others that had been helped by each act. It was amazing everyone saw the world differently; some saw color better than I did, some worse, and some strangely. I noticed hearing was also different it was hard to put into words. There was even a difference in taste in each mouth. It was astonishing to be in another person seeing the world as them. Some were so small and fragile and I could feel their fears, see their entire lives if I wished, as I relived the act that helped them. It made the best sex that I had ever had seem like a loose handshake from a sweaty fat man. Many traumatic events in my life were seen and understood. When all was seen, I was again filled by this Goddess with tenderness until I again nearly burst. She told me that, 'Every act of kindness matters.' Before I was sent back, I asked how long was I here and is this what it would be like for everyone else. I was told that I was there for seven years and that each person would see only what they could understand when they came to her. Some would see her as Jesus, some their fathers or moms, every imaginable deity as well.

All that mattered was that they be changed and completed, made new. I was shot back through the tunnel and saw a dark husk beneath me. A bit of a conflict was going on. Then I realized the dark husk was my body - dead.

The woman that was assisting my surgeon pushed him aside and reached into me as I re-entered my body. The pain was tremendous I could feel the rubber and even the hair on her arm as burning razors.

The anesthetic finally got me. I heard a woman complaining even yelling and realized that it was about me. 'What is wrong with him? They brought him here hours ago and he is scanning everything. He's out cold and scanning everything. No one can do this but him, I tried, and others tried. What's wrong with him?' I realized that I was not really in my body I could hear it thinking that since it couldn't get up how could it protect anyone. Maybe it could lure another to attack me and use the IV to hurt them to protect the others. I had spent a lifetime training and protecting others and my body was grimly on duty. My soul was in rapture overwhelmed with joy. I entered my body looked at the nurse and she looked very embarrassed.

Background Information:

Gender: Male

Date NDE Occurred: 4-14 -04

NDE Elements:

At the time of your experience, was there an associated life-threatening event? Yes Surgery-related Clinical death (cessation of breathing or heart function or brain function) Minor surgery that went bad.

How do you consider the content of your experience? Wonderful

The experience included: Out of body experience

Did you feel separated from your body? Yes I clearly left my body and existed outside it

How did your highest level of consciousness and alertness during the experience compare to your normal everyday consciousness and alertness? More consciousness and alertness than normal When I was in the people that I had helped.

At what time during the experience were you at your highest level of consciousness and alertness? When I was in the people that I had helped.

Were your thoughts speeded up? Incredibly fast

Did time seem to speed up or slow down? Everything seemed to be happening at once; or time stopped or lost all meaning Time was much faster there when compared to our time. It also was irrelevant.

Were your senses more vivid than usual? Incredibly more vivid

Please compare your vision during the experience to your everyday vision that you had immediately prior to the time of the experience. I could see anything and colors that I could not describe as well.

Did you seem to be aware of things going on elsewhere? Yes, and the facts have been checked out

Did you pass into or through a tunnel? Yes It was very fast and appeared not to matter.

Did you see any beings in your experience? I actually saw them

Did you encounter or become aware of any deceased (or alive) beings? Yes

The experience included: Void

The experience included: Darkness

The experience included: Light

Did you see, or feel surrounded by, a brilliant light? A light clearly of mystical or other-worldly origin

Did you see an unearthly light? Yes Light from below and from every being and object near me.

Did you seem to enter some other, unearthly world? A clearly mystical or unearthly realm

What emotions did you feel during the experience? Terror, bliss, joy, sorrow, wonder, extreme happiness, Love and tenderness.

Did you have a feeling of peace or pleasantness? Incredible peace or pleasantness

Did you have a feeling of joy? incredible joy

Did you feel a sense of harmony or unity with the universe? I felt united or one with the world

Did you suddenly seem to understand everything? Everything about the universe

The experience included: Life review

Did scenes from your past come back to you? My past flashed before me, out of my control I am no longer a creature of guilt. I feel peace in bad situations and feel less pain regarding the death of loved ones.

Did scenes from the future come to you? Scenes from the world's future

The experience included: Boundary

Did you reach a boundary or limiting physical structure? Uncertain I was controlled.

Did you come to a border or point of no return? I came to a barrier that I was not permitted to cross; or was sent back against my will

God, Spiritual and Religion:

What was your religion prior to your experience? Liberal

Have your religious practices changed since your experience? Yes They have become much deeper.

What is your religion now? Liberal

Did you have a change in your values and beliefs because of your experience? Yes They have become much deeper.

The experience included: Presence of unearthly beings

Did you seem to encounter a mystical being or presence, or hear an unidentifiable voice? I encountered a definite being, or a voice clearly of mystical or unearthly origin

Did you see deceased or religious spirits? I actually saw them

Concerning our Earthly lives other than Religion:

During your experience, did you gain special knowledge or information about your purpose? Uncertain

Have your relationships changed specifically because of your experience? Yes

After the NDE:

Was the experience difficult to express in words? Uncertain I was dead for one minute forty-seven seconds, yet I was on the border to the other side for seven years. I cannot remember all of it yet still become very emotional when discussing it. It was not what I had expected and more than I could have believed possible.

Do you have any psychic, non-ordinary or other special gifts after your experience that you did not have before the experience? Yes I am much more empathic.

Are there one or several parts of your experience that are especially meaningful or significant to you? It was overwhelming and wonderful.

Have you ever shared this experience with others? Yes About a month later as I tried to put it all together first.

Did you have any knowledge of near death experience (NDE) prior to your experience? Yes I heard that people experience a tunnel light and past life review but thought it was all crap.

What did you believe about the reality of your experience shortly (days to weeks) after it happened? Experience was definitely real With wonder.

What do you believe about the reality of your experience now? Experience was definitely real

At any time in your life, has anything ever reproduced any part of the experience? Yes Trance and deep meditation.