Experience Description

I was due to give birth to my third child. After being in labor for eleven hours, my doctor said she needed to do an emergency C'sarian-section. They did an epidural. Somebody put a mask on my face and I started shaking and couldn't breathe. I was in panic and tried to reach out to the doctor beside me but everything went black. I thought I was dreaming or hallucinating, screaming without a voice. Things I didn't understand just seemed to be happening while I was floating or flying or traveling too fast. Ahead there was a ‘place’ of light or a glow of very cool unearthly colors, like a shade between yellow or gold or pale pink but nothing like any color I know. The light was bright but not glaring, enveloping but with no heat. Events I cannot understand were going on too fast. It was like I was going through or flying past them, and I am like I didn't want to go through that. I felt a ‘presence’ with a voice, but not really a voice. Somebody was leading me through that tunnel of light to get out of it or into something. I remember myself ‘arguing’. The last thing I remember was telling him, ‘my baby needs me!’ (I cry every time I remember this.) Then the whole ‘event’ just stopped like a hole opened in front of me. I woke up to find that the ‘hole’ was the light on the operating table. The anesthesiologist was reviving me by patting my face repeatedly and saying, ‘You're Ok, you're OK.’

At the time, I knew something happened during the surgery but didn't know what it was. My medical records didn't show anything unusual but I was in hospital for ten days, which was not normal. I thought I had an unusual dream but I felt it was special.

Background Information:

Gender: Female

Date NDE Occurred: 'August 26, 1988'

NDE Elements:

At the time of your experience, was there an associated life-threatening event? Yes Surgery-related 'Life threatening event, but not clinical death' I was taken to the university hospital for normal delivery of my third baby. I was in labor for eleven hours and was told an emergency Ceasarian section will be done due to fetal distress. I was shaking and couldn't breathe but someone put a mask on my face and I couldn't tell what was happening.

How do you consider the content of your experience? Entirely pleasant

Did you feel separated from your body? No I lost awareness of my body

How did your highest level of consciousness and alertness during the experience compare to your normal everyday consciousness and alertness? More consciousness and alertness than normal Everything was happening all at once and I just knew.

At what time during the experience were you at your highest level of consciousness and alertness? Just before I asked to let me go when I said, ‘my baby needs me.’

Were your thoughts speeded up? Incredibly fast

Did time seem to speed up or slow down? Everything seemed to be happening at once; or time stopped or lost all meaning

Were your senses more vivid than usual? More vivid than usual

Please compare your vision during the experience to your everyday vision that you had immediately prior to the time of the experience. I have never had a hallucination that's why I thought that must have been one. It's not like I was seeing something as it happens like a movie, but more like I am part of it, but I see me and the presence was not really visible.

Please compare your hearing during the experience to your everyday hearing that you had immediately prior to the time of the experience. Like my vision, my hearing was not really hearing. The voice was talking to me and I was talking, but not a normal voice.

Did you seem to be aware of things going on elsewhere? No

The experience included: Tunnel

Did you pass into or through a tunnel? Yes The ‘place’ was like a tunnel but had no darkness. There was just an enveloping glow of light. I knew there was something at the end of it.

Did you see any beings in your experience? No

Did you encounter or become aware of any deceased (or alive) beings? Yes I think I encountered babies or children.

The experience included: Unearthly light

Did you see, or feel surrounded by, a brilliant light? A light clearly of mystical or other-worldly origin

Did you see an unearthly light? Yes I felt that light, more like glow that surrounds. Unusual colors. It was shades between yellow, gold, or pale pink.

Did you seem to enter some other, unearthly world? No

The experience included: Strong emotional tone

What emotions did you feel during the experience? I didn't want to go but I wasn't confused or sad. I was peaceful but I was insistent about not going. I was not scared about where I was being taken. I thought it was going to be beautiful.

Did you have a feeling of peace or pleasantness? Incredible peace or pleasantness

Did you have a feeling of joy? No

Did you feel a sense of harmony or unity with the universe? I felt no longer in conflict with nature

The experience included: Special knowledge or purpose

Did you suddenly seem to understand everything? Everything about myself or others

Did scenes from your past come back to you? No

Did scenes from the future come to you? No

The experience included: Boundary

Did you reach a boundary or limiting physical structure? Uncertain I know I didn't want to go.

Did you come to a border or point of no return? I came to a barrier that I was not permitted to cross; or was sent back against my will

God, Spiritual and Religion:


What importance did you place on your religious/spiritual life prior to your experience? Moderately important to me

What was your religion prior to your experience? Christian- Catholic devout Catholic, I had a rosary during the preparation for surgery and had to entrust it to one of the medical personnel

Have your religious practices changed since your experience? Yes

What importance do you place on your religious/spiritual life after your experience? Greatly important to me

What is your religion now? Christian- Catholic not anymore a devout Catholic, more a spiritual one by choice. I still believe in the basic tenets but I do not feel bound to obey, I have more freedom

Did your experience include features consistent with your earthly beliefs? Content that was both consistent and not consistent with the beliefs you had at the time of your experience

Did you have a change in your values and beliefs because of your experience? Yes

The experience included: Presence of unearthly beings

Did you seem to encounter a mystical being or presence, or hear an unidentifiable voice? I encountered a definite being, or a voice clearly of mystical or unearthly origin I was being led by a presence talking to me but not a real voice.

Did you see deceased or religious spirits? No

Did you encounter or become aware of any beings who previously lived on earth who are described by name in religions (for example: Jesus, Muhammad, Buddha, etc.)? Yes I thought he was more of a messenger.. he was not a face but a presence who understood me.

During your experience, did you gain information about premortal existence? No

During your experience, did you gain information about universal connection or oneness? No

Did you believe in the existence of God prior to your experience? God probably exists┬

During your experience, did you gain information about the existence of God? No

Do you believe in the existence of God after your experience? God definitely exists

Concerning our Earthly lives other than Religion:


During your experience, did you gain special knowledge or information about your purpose? Yes

Did you believe that our earthly lives are meaningful and significant prior to your experience? Are probably meaningful and significant

During your experience, did you gain information about the meaning of life? Uncertain I had decided on my purpose but I clearly know I was asking to be allowed and trying to convince my way out of there.

Did you believe in an afterlife prior to your experience? An afterlife probably exists┬

Do you believe in an afterlife after your experience? An afterlife definitely exists Uncertain I was not told I was dying, I was going somewhere good and I didn't want to go

Did you fear death prior to your experience? I moderately feared death

Do you fear death after your experience? I do not fear death

Were you fearful living your life prior to your experience? Moderately fearful in living my earthly life

Were you fearful living your life after your experience? Not fearful in living my earthly life

Did you believe that our earthly lives are meaningful and significant prior to your experience? Are probably meaningful and significant

Did you believe that our earthly lives are meaningful and significant after your experience? Are meaningful and significant

Did you gain information about how to live our lives? Uncertain

During your experience, did you gain information about life's difficulties, challenges and hardships? No

Were you compassionate prior to your experience? Greatly compassionate toward others

During your experience, did you gain information about love? Yes The presence was a loving presence, and that was felt

Were you compassionate after your experience? Greatly compassionate toward others

What life changes occurred in your life after your experience? Large changes in my life My life changed substantially from my experience.

Have your relationships changed specifically because of your experience? Yes Yes I had the courage and strength to leave my abusive ex-husband. I have forgiven my father who continually abused me.

After the NDE:


Was the experience difficult to express in words? Yes My feelings were heightened during the encounter. My insistence to get back for my baby was very strong. I wasn't confused or afraid. I knew I was going somewhere good.

How accurately do you remember the experience in comparison to other life events that occurred around the time of the experience? I remember the experience more accurately than other life events that occurred around the time of the experience

Do you have any psychic, non-ordinary or other special gifts after your experience that you did not have before the experience? Yes

Have you ever shared this experience with others? Yes

Did you have any knowledge of near death experience (NDE) prior to your experience? No

What did you believe about the reality of your experience shortly (days to weeks) after it happened? Experience was definitely real

What do you believe about the reality of your experience now? Experience was definitely real

At any time in your life, has anything ever reproduced any part of the experience? No