Matt T NDE

Experience Description

Prior to the experience I was trying to climb to a new height in the 'climbing tree' in our back yard. I was alone and had no one to help me. I had ascended as far as I could go upward and was attempting to descend, but I could not reach the branch below with my foot. I tried to reach the lower branch, but lost my grip and fell backward, landing flat on my back. I felt as though the air had been knocked out of me to the point I passed out. The pain ceased. I immediately found myself in a dark cave or mine-like tunnel with darkness all around except directly before me. I could see fires before me clearly. Figures were silhouetted in the light. I stared at them for a few moments and did not recognize any of them. Collectively, they appeared old and had 'a bad sort of energy.' A young short lady in black and white stepped forward from the group. She wore a pleasant smile and had a sense of loving kindness about her. I stood about ten feet or so away from her. She said, ‘go back, you don't have to come up here!’ The figures were all human looking. They were in black and white and were located up a ramp at the end of the tunnel. They were backed by a white light that was not harsh to look at.

As I turned to walk away, I noticed a hand on my left shoulder. I could see a male hand with a cuffed sleeve like from a garment of thick wool-like material hanging loosely from the wrist. Like perhaps Jesus would have worn. The hand guided me and turned me abruptly into the rock-like wall of the tunnel to my left. I did not see the rest of the person holding my shoulder, but I did notice the area from where I came was dark. The hand on my shoulder guided me directly through the wall and immediately I appeared inside a brightly lit area. The hand was still on my left shoulder. It appeared the area was mainly about seven to eight feet in radius but had no wall. The boundaries were more like whiffs of clouds of white and pearl color mixed like fluffed cotton candy. In the center on the floor was a half-buried orb of golden glowing energy. I got a glimpse of it. It was more yellow in the center and golden around the outer edge. Then I was not able to look directly at it anymore.

I suddenly notice about five or six translucent male figures standing about the orb of which 'rays of a whitish light were being emitted. All the men were standing at different distances from the orb. All were facing inward with the exception of one who was standing with his back to the orb. All were adult images. At least two had beards. One wore a shortly cropped beard with medium length hair and appeared to be late twenties to mid-thirty in age. Another appeared to be seventy or so and sported longer, fuller hair with a matching beard. These men did not move. They strode motionless. I could see the orb if I looked through the younger man without hurting me eyes. They were all translucent. The feeling of love (that kind of love one feels when held by a loving mother as an infant) was far more intense there than any I have ever felt before or sense. A voice spoke out and asked, ‘are you worthy of this level of existence?’ Immediately I felt within myself the 'feeling of doubt'. And, just like that, I was gone from that area. Poof! Gone! Suddenly, I was in a much larger area apparently outside of the orb containing area. I could see rays leaving the 'ceiling' of the area heading toward pearly, billowy 'clouds' directly above. It was beautiful. I could not see the men inside.

The hand was still on my shoulder. Again, I was asked by a voice from 'everywhere'. ‘Are you worthy of this level of existence?’ And, as before, I felt the feeling of doubt and I was gone from that 'place'. I immediately 'reappeared' in a much larger space. The sky was black in contrast to rolling hills of blue glasslike turf and a 'golden road' running between the hills of blue glass. I was no longer accompanied by the hand on my shoulder and I walked toward the 'golden road'. I recall sitting along the road and picking up Kerala from the road. They appeared like gold-covered raisins but were lighter than popcorn and made up a perfectly grouped road about twelve to fifteen feet wide. The road traveled from my left to my right and went from horizon to horizon. There was nothing else in this picture. I walked from this road back up the hill I had just descended. I instantly knew I was not worthy here either, as I walked over the hill and viewed the horizon from the highest point.

The road had disappeared. I could only see blue glass in the form of a descending slope to a mile long beach from my right to my left. The beach was longer to my right. There was a storm-like event with dark gray clouds to my upper right. Beyond the beach directly before me was pure darkness. A pure and endless void. I walked down the slope toward the beach with the 'storm' billowing to the right. I noticed the feeling of love here, but it was much, much less than from the area containing the orb. It was still much greater than I had ever experienced at home, in my regular life. As I approached the beach, I could see 'beings.' Infant-sized beings walking along the beach mixing together. Some were standing still, while some were scurrying about. There were some alone and some in groups. There were millions. They could 'walk through' each other. There were no 'adult'-appearing beings in sight, only the infant-sized and appearing ones. Suddenly a voice from the 'storm cloud' bellowed out a question: ‘Who wants to be born of alcoholic parents?’ This was one example. I don't recall all of the questions being asked, but there were several.

However, each time a question was asked a 'being' responded by flying off into the dark abyss before me. I felt fear and ran to my left, further with each question. That was asked not wanting to respond. ‘No, not me,’ I said to myself. I ran to the end of the beach screaming, ‘no, no, no!’ I had never felt so much 'love' before and did not want to ever lose it. Then, I was at the end of the beach to my far left. I could go no further. I was at a point at the end with nowhere else to go. I was, however, happy to be there. I could feel the 'love' and that's all that mattered. I was content right there! Then, just as suddenly as before, I heard ‘my’ question. I don’t recall what it was, but I felt compelled to accept. I 'flew' off into the darkness before me in a giant swooping action. There was 'nothingness', just my thoughts and me. I did not want to think. I floated there in the darkness for what seemed like a long, long time. I felt nothing, saw nothing, heard nothing. I even stopped thinking. I was, but I wasn't. Then I heard bubbling sounds first, and then I could see red. I could taste nothing and do not recall feeling anything physically. The ever-so-faint feeling of 'love' lingered, but a billion times less than on the beach. It was a billion times less than near the orb. This lasted for a while.

Then 'one day' I felt compressed and claustrophobic and to make this brief, I went through a birth process. I felt cold and lights bothered my eyes. I wanted to keep them closed. Then, I woke up, got up from the backyard lawn and walked into the house through the side door. No one else was home. No one witnessed this event but me.

Background Information:

Gender: Male

Date NDE Occurred: 1961

NDE Elements:

At the time of your experience, was there an associated life-threatening event? Yes Accident I fell from a tree and landed flat on my back and was unconscious for an undetermined period of time. I fell on my back from about ten feet above the ground.

How do you consider the content of your experience? Both pleasant AND distressing

The experience included: Out of body experience

Did you feel separated from your body? No I lost awareness of my body

How did your highest level of consciousness and alertness during the experience compare to your normal everyday consciousness and alertness? More consciousness and alertness than normal I had heightened senses. I was very focused on ‘me.’

At what time during the experience were you at your highest level of consciousness and alertness? At the road while sitting there.

Were your thoughts speeded up? No

Did time seem to speed up or slow down? No

Were your senses more vivid than usual? More vivid than usual

Please compare your vision during the experience to your everyday vision that you had immediately prior to the time of the experience. Normal in speed. There was increased emotion, vivid visuals, and increased mental awareness.

Please compare your hearing during the experience to your everyday hearing that you had immediately prior to the time of the experience. Decreased compared to normal, except at the beach which was louder.

Did you seem to be aware of things going on elsewhere? No

The experience included: Tunnel

The experience included: Presence of deceased persons

Did you see any beings in your experience? I actually saw them

Did you encounter or become aware of any deceased (or alive) beings? Yes The ancestors at the end of the tunnel.

The experience included: Void

The experience included: Darkness

The experience included: Unearthly light

Did you see, or feel surrounded by, a brilliant light? A light clearly of mystical or other-worldly origin

Did you see an unearthly light? Yes

The experience included: A landscape or city

Did you seem to enter some other, unearthly world? A clearly mystical or unearthly realm

The experience included: Strong emotional tone

What emotions did you feel during the experience? Love, fear, and loneliness.

Did you have a feeling of peace or pleasantness? Relief or calmness

Did you have a feeling of joy? No

Did you feel a sense of harmony or unity with the universe? No

The experience included: Special knowledge or purpose

Did you suddenly seem to understand everything? No

Did scenes from your past come back to you? No

Did scenes from the future come to you? No

The experience included: Boundary

Did you reach a boundary or limiting physical structure? Yes The end of the beach to my left.

Did you come to a border or point of no return? I came to a barrier that I was not permitted to cross; or was sent back against my will

God, Spiritual and Religion:

What importance did you place on your religious/spiritual life prior to your experience? Moderately important to me

What was your religion prior to your experience? Christian- Catholic

Have your religious practices changed since your experience? No

What importance do you place on your religious/spiritual life after your experience? Moderately important to me

What is your religion now? Christian- Protestant

Did your experience include features consistent with your earthly beliefs? Content that was both consistent and not consistent with the beliefs you had at the time of your experience

Did you have a change in your values and beliefs because of your experience? Uncertain

The experience included: Presence of unearthly beings

Did you seem to encounter a mystical being or presence, or hear an unidentifiable voice? I encountered a definite being, or a voice clearly of mystical or unearthly origin The hand on my shoulder, the glowing orb, the men standing about the orb, the people at the end of the tunnel, and the infants on the beach.

Did you see deceased or religious spirits? I actually saw them

Did you encounter or become aware of any beings who previously lived on earth who are described by name in religions (for example: Jesus, Muhammad, Buddha, etc.)? Yes The hand of Jesus. Perhaps MOses and Peter

During your experience, did you gain information about premortal existence? Yes Going back to the beach and in the darkness and in the pre itch and birth parts.

During your experience, did you gain information about universal connection or oneness? Uncertain

Did you believe in the existence of God prior to your experience? God definitely exists

During your experience, did you gain information about the existence of God? Uncertain

Do you believe in the existence of God after your experience? God definitely exists

Concerning our Earthly lives other than Religion:

During your experience, did you gain special knowledge or information about your purpose? Uncertain

Did you believe that our earthly lives are meaningful and significant prior to your experience? Unknown

During your experience, did you gain information about the meaning of life? Uncertain

Did you believe in an afterlife prior to your experience? An afterlife definitely exists

Do you believe in an afterlife after your experience? An afterlife definitely exists Uncertain

Did you fear death prior to your experience? I did not fear death

Do you fear death after your experience? I moderately fear death

Were you fearful living your life prior to your experience? Not fearful in living my earthly life

Were you fearful living your life after your experience? Greatly fearful in living my earthly life

Did you believe that our earthly lives are meaningful and significant prior to your experience? Unknown

Did you believe that our earthly lives are meaningful and significant after your experience? Are meaningful and significant

Did you gain information about how to live our lives? Uncertain

During your experience, did you gain information about life's difficulties, challenges and hardships? Yes Questions being asked of the infant like beings was revealing.

Were you compassionate prior to your experience? Unknown

During your experience, did you gain information about love? Yes From intense love at the 'orb' to minimal love hear on earth.

Were you compassionate after your experience? Moderately compassionate toward others

What life changes occurred in your life after your experience? Large changes in my life There were lots of changes. It's personal.

Have your relationships changed specifically because of your experience? No No

After the NDE:

Was the experience difficult to express in words? Yes The experience was too complex to describe fully or adequately.

How accurately do you remember the experience in comparison to other life events that occurred around the time of the experience? I remember the experience more accurately than other life events that occurred around the time of the experience

Do you have any psychic, non-ordinary or other special gifts after your experience that you did not have before the experience? Yes

Have you ever shared this experience with others? Yes

Did you have any knowledge of near death experience (NDE) prior to your experience? No

What did you believe about the reality of your experience shortly (days to weeks) after it happened? Experience was definitely real

What do you believe about the reality of your experience now? Experience was definitely real

At any time in your life, has anything ever reproduced any part of the experience? No