I was lying on my back in a cot. I knew that I shouldn't lie flat or on my back because of the sleep apnea. I told myself that I would only take a short nap, and not allow myself to drift off because I had been out of my body before and did not want to go again, as I had three small children to raise (please forgive my typing abilities). Anyway, I'm lying in the cot and I start hearing an 'electrical' buzzing sound and begin to feel heavy as lead. At this point, I know there is no turning back, because this sound along with feeling heavy as lead has always preceded previous out of body experiences. I think to myself, 'Oh no here you go again, you shouldn't be doing this.' Then, without even any sensation of coming out of my body, I am floating in a grey mist. This grey mist is a neutral zone as much as I could tell. My form is now spherical with a small sphere on top, which is my head. This sphere (that I am) is made of soft greyish blue light. I'm just floating there in a grey mist, thinking 'now what?', and 'will I be able to get back?' Then floating down from my above right comes a... so hard to describe, but here goes: A light formed as the finest confetti, and every piece of the confetti is light, love, the most peaceful loving music I have ever heard, and everything that is good. All this came down through me. But I knew that I must not stay, even though I could easily want to. I thought to myself 'I can't stay; I have to raise my three children.' At that point, nothing changed. Then I decided to pray. I said 'Our Father...' The first word was not all the way said, and in less than a second I was back in my body.
Date NDE Occurred: 1984
At the time of your experience, was there an associated life-threatening event? Yes stopped breathing according to my doctor and lack of oxygen to the brain. Stopped breathing due to sleep apnea.
How do you consider the content of your experience? Entirely pleasant
The experience included: Out of body experience
Did you feel separated from your body? No
I clearly left my body and existed outside it
How did your highest level of consciousness and alertness during the experience compare to your normal everyday consciousness and alertness? More consciousness and alertness than normal Sorry no words to explain.
At what time during the experience were you at your highest level of consciousness and alertness? WHEN THE LIGHT WASHED THROUGH ME.
Were your thoughts speeded up? No
Did time seem to speed up or slow down? Everything seemed to be happening at once; or time stopped or lost all meaning
Were your senses more vivid than usual? More vivid than usual
Please compare your vision during the experience to your everyday vision that you had immediately prior to the time of the experience. 100% instead of 50%
Please compare your hearing during the experience to your everyday hearing that you had immediately prior to the time of the experience. 100% instead of 50%
Did you seem to be aware of things going on elsewhere? No
Did you pass into or through a tunnel? No
Did you see any beings in your experience? No
Did you encounter or become aware of any deceased (or alive) beings? No
The experience included: Unearthly light
Did you see, or feel surrounded by, a brilliant light? A light clearly of mystical or other-worldly origin
Did you see an unearthly light? No Iridescent fine confetti type light particles that were living love, music, peace and beauty.
Did you seem to enter some other, unearthly world? A clearly mystical or unearthly realm
What emotions did you feel during the experience? First panic and sadness because I didn't want to leave my children. Then when the Light came to me I felt extreme love and peace.
Did you have a feeling of peace or pleasantness? Incredible peace or pleasantness
Did you have a feeling of joy? Happiness
Did you feel a sense of harmony or unity with the universe? I felt united or one with the world
Did you suddenly seem to understand everything? No
Did scenes from your past come back to you? No
Did scenes from the future come to you? No
Did you come to a border or point of no return? No
God, Spiritual and Religion:
What importance did you place on your religious/spiritual life prior to your experience? Slightly important to me
What was your religion prior to your experience? Christian- Catholic fallen away Catholic. Although still believed in God.
Have your religious practices changed since your experience? Yes I'm certain there's a God and that he loves every person on this Earth.
What importance do you place on your religious/spiritual life after your experience? Greatly important to me
What is your religion now? Christian- Catholic Only returned to the Catholic faith 5 years ago, after a 25 year absence. My father came to live with me, and I took him to church and this triggered my return (to church).
Did your experience include features consistent with your earthly beliefs? Content that was both consistent and not consistent with the beliefs you had at the time of your experience In hind sight I thought that the grey mist may have been a part of purgatory which would have been consistent with my Catholic upbringing.Also consistent was that God is Love. Uconsistent: my form being a large blue-grey light(was kinda dissapponted that I wasn't brighter - vanity thy name is woman.) On a side note ,in previous oob's I always hadc my current body form, only made of spirit.
Did you have a change in your values and beliefs because of your experience? Yes CERTAIN THAT THERE IS A GOD AND HE LOVES US.
Did you seem to encounter a mystical being or presence, or hear an unidentifiable voice? I encountered a definite being, or a voice clearly of mystical or unearthly origin The light was love and gave me comfort so I guess maybe it was a presence.
Did you see deceased or religious spirits? No
Did you encounter or become aware of any beings who previously lived on earth who are described by name in religions (for example: Jesus, Muhammad, Buddha, etc.)? No
During your experience, did you gain information about premortal existence? Uncertain That light, love, music and peace could all be one as i experienced It.
During your experience, did you gain information about universal connection or oneness? Uncertain I am aware now that we are all loved beyond anyway we can imagne.
Did you believe in the existence of God prior to your experience? I was uncertain if God exists
During your experience, did you gain information about the existence of God? Uncertain Maybe that that this light was an emissary of , or a part of God.
Do you believe in the existence of God after your experience? God definitely exists
Concerning our Earthly lives other than Religion:
During your experience, did you gain special knowledge or information about your purpose? No
Did you believe that our earthly lives are meaningful and significant prior to your experience? Are probably meaningful and significant
During your experience, did you gain information about the meaning of life? No
Did you believe in an afterlife prior to your experience? I was uncertain if an afterlife exists
Do you believe in an afterlife after your experience? An afterlife definitely exists Yes awareness that this is where I will go back to when I die.
Did you fear death prior to your experience? I moderately feared death
Do you fear death after your experience? I do not fear death
Were you fearful living your life prior to your experience? Moderately fearful in living my earthly life
Were you fearful living your life after your experience? Not fearful in living my earthly life
Did you believe that our earthly lives are meaningful and significant after your experience? Are meaningful and significant
Did you gain information about how to live our lives? Yes Loving one another is the most important thing we have to do in this life.
During your experience, did you gain information about life's difficulties, challenges and hardships? No
Were you compassionate prior to your experience? Moderately compassionate toward others
During your experience, did you gain information about love? Yes Felt unconditional love.
Were you compassionate after your experience? Greatly compassionate toward others
What life changes occurred in your life after your experience? Moderate changes in my life I knew that we are all passing through this life for a reason.
Have your relationships changed specifically because of your experience? Yes Yes I allow people more leeway, more benefit of the doubt. I love people with more compassion. I think to myself 'I have no idea what that person goes through or has been through, just cut 'em some slack.'
After the NDE:
Was the experience difficult to express in words? Yes This other realm has many more dimensions; physical and I think emotional dimensions that we do not have the vocabulary to describe.
How accurately do you remember the experience in comparison to other life events that occurred around the time of the experience? I remember the experience more accurately than other life events that occurred around the time of the experience I was really shaken by this eperience, even though by shaken I mean in a good way.
Do you have any psychic, non-ordinary or other special gifts after your experience that you did not have before the experience? Uncertain I've had occasional precognitive dreams since I was a teenager. I sometimes know right before someone close to me is going to call. This happened before my experience, but seems to be happening more now. I still have premonitions. I have no control over this. I also seem to be able to feel what others are feeling and a lot is unwanted.
Are there one or several parts of your experience that are especially meaningful or significant to you? The Light that is love and peace. I sometimes just wish I could visit there for a while.
Have you ever shared this experience with others? Yes I shared it with my mother. She believed me, but discouraged me from telling others. She didn't want people to think I'm crazy. Over the years, I have told certain people - those who were going through difficult times. I think it helped them.
Did you have any knowledge of near death experience (NDE) prior to your experience? Uncertain As a new nurse I had an elderly lady who kept coding (heart stopped) and we kept bringing her back. Each time the doctor would walk away and the patient would say to me, 'why did he do that? I was happy where I was.' I told the doctor, then my patient told the doctor, and finally he agreed not to do CPR again. She died peacefully a short time later. That is my only contact with the subject, and I really didn't think about it much. After all I was only 21 years old and these kinds of things were far from my mind.
What did you believe about the reality of your experience shortly (days to weeks) after it happened? Experience was definitely real I believed that if I lay flat on my back again, because of my sleep apnea, I would die. This experience definitely showed me that we are spiritual beings inhabiting earthly bodies for a while. I talked with an older neighbor who was also a wonderful nurse aid that I worked with. She told me the Light was the Holy Spirit anointing me (for some mission.) I thought this might be plausible.
What do you believe about the reality of your experience now? Experience was definitely real I was really shaken by this experience, even though by shaken I mean in a good way. It was God's way to show me that He does exist, because even though I wanted to believe I had doubts.
At any time in your life, has anything ever reproduced any part of the experience? Yes I was walking through a park on a beautiful spring day, away from anyone, when suddenly I heard musical chimes coming from a nearby church. For a few seconds I was back in the Light with that beautiful feeling. I tried to recreate this same set of circumstances but never got the same feeling.
Another way I feel connected to this experience is when I am feeling especially loving towards a family member, especially a child or grandchild.
Is there anything else that you would like to add about your experience? An awareness that this is where I will go back to when I die.
In hindsight, I thought that the grey mist might have been a part of purgatory, which would have been consistent with my Catholic upbringing. Also consistent was 'God is Love.' Inconsistent: my form being a large blue-grey light. I was disappointed that I wasn't brighter - vanity thy name is woman). On a side note, in previous OBEs I always had my current bodily form, only made of spirit.
I am aware now that we are all loved beyond anyway we can imagine. Loving one another is the most important thing we have to do in this life.
Are there any other questions that we could ask to help you communicate your experience? Can't think of any.
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