Experience Description:

I was bathed in the most extreme living light one could imagine. I saw everything on earth. I saw how this light absolutely loved everything on earth, a billion times more than love, as we know it. Even the fine hair underneath plant's leaves were not only loved, but also somehow accounted for. I laughed at the notion that we did not know how much we are loved. It was stupendous in emotion. I did not want to ever leave that love. Suddenly I felt like I gasped and said,' I'm not done with my children!' Everything flew by backwards and I awoke to a smiling son. The most difficult effect for me has been the fact that I now live for that light: I want to return! No woman, child, animal or belief has ever been able to even approach this Love. It now gives me great solace when I meditate on it, as I know God is good and no one will be forgotten. The only frustration I have is that I wish everyone on earth could be bathed in, and remember, that light.

Background Information:

Gender: Male

Date NDE Occurred: August 2000

NDE Elements:

At the time of your experience, was there an associated life-threatening event? Yes Illness Direct head injury un-diagnosed high blood pressure and had worked too much overtime led to brain bleed. Other Cerebral Cortex bleed I had just suffered a massive cerebral cortex bleed and was in a coma for weeks.

How do you consider the content of your experience? Wonderful

Did you feel separated from your body? Uncertain I lost awareness of my body

How did your highest level of consciousness and alertness during the experience compare to your normal everyday consciousness and alertness? More consciousness and alertness than normal It had a different validity, more real, so much less ôweightyö than this one. The body is wonderful, but an extreme weight.

At what time during the experience were you at your highest level of consciousness and alertness? During my experience, I felt that its 'reality' was more valid than this one.

Were your thoughts speeded up? Neither

Did time seem to speed up or slow down? Neither I was in a coma.

Were your senses more vivid than usual? Incredibly more so

Please compare your vision during the experience to your everyday vision that you had immediately prior to the time of the experience. I was able to perceive light that probably could leave you blind.

Please compare your hearing during the experience to your everyday hearing that you had immediately prior to the time of the experience. There was a certain kind of knowing and I heard a voice tell me as in casual conversation, 'Down to the tip of his nose, man is exactly as what he wanted to be.'

Did you seem to be aware of things going on elsewhere? Neither

Did you pass into or through a tunnel? No

Did you see any beings in your experience? Neither

Did you encounter or become aware of any deceased (or alive) beings? No

Did you see, or feel surrounded by, a brilliant light? A light clearly of mystical or other-worldly origin

Did you see an unearthly light? Yes A living light that supported the fabric of the universe.

Did you seem to enter some other, unearthly world? Clearly mystical or unearthly realm I saw, or knew the love of that light and how everything is loved by that light.

What emotions did you feel during the experience? At first, I was not sure, then when that amazing light was present, I felt so much love, and I thought I was going to burst.

Did you have a feeling of peace or pleasantness? Incredible peace or pleasantness

Did you have a feeling of joy? Incredible joy

Did you feel a sense of harmony or unity with the universe? United, one with the world

Did you suddenly seem to understand everything? Everything about the universe

Did scenes from your past come back to you? Neither

Did scenes from the future come to you? Neither

Did you come to a border or point of no return? A conscious decision to 'return' to life

God, Spiritual and Religion:

What was your religion prior to your experience? Liberal

Have your religious practices changed since your experience? Yes The faith of my fathers has taken root.

What is your religion now? Conservative/fundamentalist

Did you have a change in your values and beliefs because of your experience? Yes The faith of my fathers has taken root.

Did you seem to encounter a mystical being or presence, or hear an unidentifiable voice? Unidentifiable voice

Did you see deceased or religious spirits? Neither

Concerning our Earthly lives other than Religion

During your experience, did you gain special knowledge or information about your purpose? Yes Words cannot describe it.

Have your relationships changed specifically because of your experience? No In the sense that I'm limited now and the advice of the lame is not well accepted.

After the NDE:

Was the experience difficult to express in words? Yes The knowledge I did not know I had and especially the living light.

Do you have any psychic, non-ordinary or other special gifts after your experience that you did not have before the experience? Uncertain Not sure, though my nursing skills seem more attuned.

Are there one or several parts of your experience that are especially meaningful or significant to you? Of course, more meaningful because I feel I will return to that light, which makes difficulties easier to bear.

Have you ever shared this experience with others? Yes I shared it right away because of its joy, I never could get the experience's wonder and joy to be understood, and it was beyond words.

Did you have any knowledge of near death experience (NDE) prior to your experience? Yes NDE is mentioned in The DMSO Handbook For Doctors, which as a psychiatric nurse I had access to. No, my prior knowledge of NDE did not play a role in my experience at all because the thought of NDE didn't come up until I was fully awake.

What did you believe about the reality of your experience shortly (days to weeks) after it happened? Experience was definitely real I was waking up to the world (post-cerebrovascular accident) and then, even now I meditate on it and it provides great solace.

What do you believe about the reality of your experience now? Experience was definitely real I view it as real, which seems distant at times, but I can never forget the stupendous amount of love we are showered by.

At any time in your life, has anything ever reproduced any part of the experience? Yes Deep meditation or prayer.

Is there anything else that you would like to add about your experience? Words are so lacking in regards to my experience.

Are there any other questions that we could ask to help you communicate your experience? Thank you for what you do.