I have been bothered by the Void since I went there, when I was 25, while I was extremely sick. Nothing I read about the Void made any sense other than expressing how it feels. This is my experience.In the void, there isn't any light. It is completely dark but you know while you are there that you are being held by a very loving (seemed like) hand of the creator. There was also a great many souls in there; each of them suspended and silent, although I felt we could communicate if we wanted but we choose not to. It is a very peaceful place. No other place that I've ever been has been that calming. I was sent away from the void, not by anyone, but because I began to hear a sound. The sound grew to become my name and I knew should I listen to the voice calling my name; I would have to return to my body. I did not want to do this and fought it with all my might. The Creator was amused by my struggle to not return to my body and I was becoming angry at my progress. When I re-entered my body it was the worse pain I ever experienced. It felt like what a screw might have felt while it was screwed into wood. When I woke, I was very sweaty and the bed was wet. I was no longer ill. It took days for me to get over an angry feeling toward everyone I was near, as I blamed everyone for bringing be back. I never spoke about this experience until much later in my life because (5-6 years later) I began reading about NDEs and this experience did not fit into those categories. I was unable to understand what had happened to me but I knew it was a very real experience. I did not want to sound like some kind of screwball so I kept quiet. I have had other experiences since that time.
Date NDE Occurred: January 1975
At the time of your experience, was there an associated life-threatening event? Yes 'Life threatening event, but not clinical death'
I had the flu during the 1974-75 flu out-break. I grew very ill but I was alone during this experience. My temperature was 106 the last time I had checked it.
How do you consider the content of your experience? Both pleasant AND distressing
Did you feel separated from your body? No
I lost awareness of my body
How did your highest level of consciousness and alertness during the experience compare to your normal everyday consciousness and alertness? More consciousness and alertness than normal The love, peace and timelessness were much greater than anything that can be described. It was there throughout the Void.
At what time during the experience were you at your highest level of consciousness and alertness? I was at my highest level while I was in the Void.
Were your thoughts speeded up? No
Did time seem to speed up or slow down? Everything seemed to be happening at once; or time stopped or lost all meaning
There was no Time. Time was not necessary in the Void as there isn't any need to measure events or thoughts.
Were your senses more vivid than usual? Incredibly more vivid
Please compare your vision during the experience to your everyday vision that you had immediately prior to the time of the experience. I did not have any vision. It was dark.
Please compare your hearing during the experience to your everyday hearing that you had immediately prior to the time of the experience. My hearing was acute as I could hear far off a garbled noise and it became clearer later. Hearing that voice meant I had to go back and so I tried not to hear it. My hearing seemed to stand out, as it was the only one of my five senses that worked. But it could have been normal sounding as well since I could not understand the garbled noise at first.
Did you seem to be aware of things going on elsewhere? No
Did you pass into or through a tunnel? No
Did you see any beings in your experience? No
Did you encounter or become aware of any deceased (or alive) beings? Yes There were millions and millions of other souls with me. I did not talk with them nor did they talk with me. I did not know who they were or why they were there. I only understood why they were there 3 days ago. That's over 40 years later.
The experience included: Void
The experience included: Darkness
Did you see, or feel surrounded by, a brilliant light? No
Did you see an unearthly light? No
Did you seem to enter some other, unearthly world? A clearly mystical or unearthly realm It was dark. It was the void.
The experience included: Strong emotional tone
What emotions did you feel during the experience? I felt LOVE, PEACE, CALM, and Timelessness. All these were greatly heightened. I did not feel any fear even though I was in total darkness.
Did you have a feeling of peace or pleasantness? Incredible peace or pleasantness
Did you have a feeling of joy? Happiness
Did you feel a sense of harmony or unity with the universe? I felt united or one with the world
Did you suddenly seem to understand everything? Everything about the universe I knew everything about the Universe but did not dwell on any topic; thus I could not bring back any knowledge with me. However, it's like asking someone to tell you all that they know about (say) math. I know math as a cluster thought but until I think about each piece, I couldn't describe what I know. I understood I knew everything but didn't care to examine it.
Did scenes from your past come back to you? No
Did scenes from the future come to you? No
Did you come to a border or point of no return? I came to a barrier that I was not permitted to cross; or was sent back against my will Hearing the voice was sending me back against my will. I would have rather stayed there.
God, Spiritual and Religion:
What importance did you place on your religious/spiritual life prior to your experience? Slightly important to me
What was your religion prior to your experience? Other or several faiths I am a military brat and have gone to many different churches in my life. Many different dominations as well as studying many of the others. All religions are correct and lead to the one path.
Have your religious practices changed since your experience? No
What importance do you place on your religious/spiritual life after your experience? Greatly important to me
What is your religion now? Other or several faiths
Did your experience include features consistent with your earthly beliefs? Content that was entirely not consistent with the beliefs you had at the time of your experience I never heard of any place like the void before.
Did you have a change in your values and beliefs because of your experience? No
The experience included: Presence of unearthly beings
Did you seem to encounter a mystical being or presence, or hear an unidentifiable voice? I encountered a definite being, or a voice clearly of mystical or unearthly origin I knew the Creator was holding me like a baby but it felt like I was in 'his hand'.
Did you see deceased or religious spirits? No
Did you encounter or become aware of any beings who previously lived on earth who are described by name in religions (for example: Jesus, Muhammad, Buddha, etc.)? No
During your experience, did you gain information about premortal existence? No
During your experience, did you gain information about universal connection or oneness? Uncertain We must be all connected if there was many more of us than just me.
Did you believe in the existence of God prior to your experience? God probably exists
During your experience, did you gain information about the existence of God? Yes His presence was with me. I could not see Him. I could feel his hands holding me and feel the love. I also was aware of who he was and I was calm.
Do you believe in the existence of God after your experience? God definitely exists
Concerning our Earthly lives other than Religion:
During your experience, did you gain special knowledge or information about your purpose? No
Did you believe that our earthly lives are meaningful and significant prior to your experience? Unknown
During your experience, did you gain information about the meaning of life? No
Did you believe in an afterlife prior to your experience? An afterlife probably exists
Do you believe in an afterlife after your experience? An afterlife definitely exists No Nothing specific but knew there was.
Did you fear death prior to your experience? I slightly feared death
Do you fear death after your experience? I do not fear death
Were you fearful living your life prior to your experience? Not fearful in living my earthly life
Were you fearful living your life after your experience? Not fearful in living my earthly life
Did you believe that our earthly lives are meaningful and significant after your experience? Are meaningful and significant
Did you gain information about how to live our lives? No
During your experience, did you gain information about life's difficulties, challenges and hardships? No
Were you compassionate prior to your experience? Slightly compassionate toward others
During your experience, did you gain information about love? No
Were you compassionate after your experience? Moderately compassionate toward others
What life changes occurred in your life after your experience? Unknown
Have your relationships changed specifically because of your experience? No No
After the NDE:
Was the experience difficult to express in words? No I choose not to say anything in case someone thought I was a crack pot. Also there wasn't any information about NDEs available for me until later and the NDEs I read about later did not say anything about a dark calm place; so I didn't bother telling anyone about it until much later.
How accurately do you remember the experience in comparison to other life events that occurred around the time of the experience? I remember the experience more accurately than other life events that occurred around the time of the experience The experience is still highly detailed. Before events and after events seem to fade with time.
Do you have any psychic, non-ordinary or other special gifts after your experience that you did not have before the experience? Yes I believe you bring back gifts when you return. I sometimes can tell what will happen just before it happens. I also find lost things and people. I try not to say anything about people as they are usually dead and no one would believe me anyway. Everyone seems to ask me to find things for them.
Have you ever shared this experience with others? Yes About 15 years later I shared it with a teacher friend I had. He was very interested in it as he did not hear about the Void before, but he had heard of NDEs.
Did you have any knowledge of near death experience (NDE) prior to your experience? No
What did you believe about the reality of your experience shortly (days to weeks) after it happened? Experience was definitely real No doubt about it. Experience was real and I feel that way today; 40ish years later.
What do you believe about the reality of your experience now? Experience was definitely real No doubt about it. Experience was real and I feel that way today; 40ish years later.
At any time in your life, has anything ever reproduced any part of the experience? Yes On occasions, I've felt the 'love' come from out of nowhere. Sometimes it makes me cry when it comes. It is a very over powering feeling that is not earthly.
Is there anything else that you would like to add about your experience? Three days ago, I figured out what the Void is and why it's there. It is what prompted me to tell my story. Of course everyone and their cousins are going to think I am crazy but now I understand.
Are there any other questions that we could ask to help you communicate your experience? Why not ask a question of what one has taken from their experience now at a later time? Seems information or knowledge comes back over time and an understanding of the experience becomes clearer.
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