Experience Description

At the same time that the nurse noticed my state, I suddenly saw at the end of my bed a very white light that seemed alive. Then a silhouette took shape. At the same time, my abdominal pain vanished. I felt total well-being. The silhouette was very beautiful, tall gentleman. He appeared with a big book that he was carrying open on his left arm. He was at least 2 meters tall. He had long, fair colored hair framing a harmonious face. He had a deep look coming from his pale blue eyes. The gentleman had a beard; his outfit looked like a big white coat or a tunic. He emanated enormous Love and understanding.

Telepathically I heard his first question, ‘Who would you like me to inform in case of . . .?’ He questioned me kindly. I replied, ‘Inform my mother, she doesn't know that I'm not well.’ He asked, ‘What do you wish of life?’ I replied, ‘I so much would like to tell my children that I love them! That they should love life. I'm so unhappy.’ He said, ‘Look at your life, see how you can evolve; feel your emotions.’ I then saw part of my life passing by. This was mainly my fears of my violent alcoholic husband, maybe my lack of courage to face the rest. Then I felt strength that I didn't know I had. I felt like a little brave soldier in myself and the desire to make a 360° turn. I felt like the doors of my new life were just asking to open. I felt LOVE, an unconditional love, a state of grace. I had no notion of time passing.

I remember that at the moment of coming back to this world of the living that this gentleman who was full of compassion disappeared ‘vaporously’ with the extreme white brightness.

Each time when a blood bag was influencing my body, my mind went back to the state of bliss. Once roughly stabilized, I found myself in a surgery room, lying flat, with the arms tied up crosswise. I felt that I had to make a decision. The anesthetist saw my tears and assured me that they would do everything possible to get me out of trouble. My only reply was tears, running down my cheeks. I was able to tell him, ‘I want to continue to Love.’ (While writing those few lines, I'm still crying.)

I then felt letting go of this sick envelope that was hindering me. I think that my 'soul' found an exit through my breast; I saw the team silently preparing the instruments in haste. I was above the big lamp that lighted the table. Time didn't count anymore. The light came back, I was bathed in it, alone but not abandoned. I didn't see a tunnel. I took the decision with full determination to come back to my body. I felt myself gliding inside through my head. It was very painful.

My mother came fast to my side, without anybody from the hospital having informed her. She told me that a strange feeling had stopped her in her everyday work and that she had pestered my father to bring her quickly to my side. She felt that I wasn't well. My father was stunned by such determination and did as she demanded.

Background Information:

Gender: Female

Date NDE Occurred: juin 2008

NDE Elements:

At the time of your experience, was there an associated life-threatening event? Yes Surgery-related Life threatening event, but not clinical death Following a hysterectomy, I felt strong pain in my belly and I was really tired. I looked at the catheter drain at my right side and saw that the bag was filling with blood too fast. I had time to inform the medical staff. They noticed the state I was in and then everything happened very fast. There was a palpable tension of all the nurses and doctors taking turns at my side. I was getting more and more tired. I heard a nurse saying to one of her colleagues, ‘We will lose her...her blood pressure is down to 4/12...’ I have a rare blood type AB+

How do you consider the content of your experience? Entirely pleasant

The experience included: Out of body experience

Did you feel separated from your body? Yes I felt myself floating above the big lamp that lights the table. The only person I questioned shortly was the anesthetist. I told her what I saw and felt. I told her of the presence of a tall man at my side. She assured me that no such person was at my side, and concerning the operating room, that what I perceived was correct but that I was supposed being under anesthetic. She asked me if I wanted to talk about it, but I didn't want to. I clearly left my body and existed outside it

How did your highest level of consciousness and alertness during the experience compare to your normal everyday consciousness and alertness? More consciousness and alertness than normal I was able to distinguish my priorities, at the most. Which included: to listening to this being rather than to fight and panic.

At what time during the experience were you at your highest level of consciousness and alertness? At the moment when this man appeared at the end of my bed.

Were your thoughts speeded up? Incredibly fast

Did time seem to speed up or slow down? Everything seemed to be happening at once; or time stopped or lost all meaning The moments of 'resurrection' were due to the fact that blood bags were given and brought me back shortly, and when I understood that there was nothing to fear of my second state, I just let myself glide into it more easily.

Were your senses more vivid than usual? More vivid than usual

Please compare your vision during the experience to your everyday vision that you had immediately prior to the time of the experience. Before this encounter, I felt myself dying slowly. I had great fear. Then came the moment when I let go in safety and Love. Everything got bearable and even beyond that.

Please compare your hearing during the experience to your everyday hearing that you had immediately prior to the time of the experience. I heard the medical staff. It resonated like crystal, no echoes, no interference or noises from the corridor, I would say rather sharp and crystalline sounds.

Did you seem to be aware of things going on elsewhere? Yes, and the facts have been checked out

Did you pass into or through a tunnel? No

Did you see any beings in your experience? No

Did you encounter or become aware of any deceased (or alive) beings? No

The experience included: Unearthly light

Did you see, or feel surrounded by, a brilliant light? A light clearly of mystical or other-worldly origin

Did you see an unearthly light? Yes 'Evanescent' light, it was almost 'alive', white non-blinding, soft, enveloping, physical.

Did you seem to enter some other, unearthly world? A clearly mystical or unearthly realm

What emotions did you feel during the experience? The strongest emotion was LOVE, calm, assurance of a better future, DESIRE in the sense of the word.

Did you have a feeling of peace or pleasantness? Incredible peace or pleasantness

Did you have a feeling of joy? Happiness

Did you feel a sense of harmony or unity with the universe? I felt united or one with the world

Did you suddenly seem to understand everything? Everything about the universe I felt the suffering of nature, also its life, I understood animals and plants; like a mission that would come.

The experience included: Life review

Did scenes from your past come back to you? I remembered many past events I never doubted it would be like doubting a divine word; I'm sure of what happened without any doubt. But like a treasure I kept it a long time for myself.

Did scenes from the future come to you? Scenes from my personal future I saw myself like a soldier, like a messenger, it would be my duty to inform about the power, which was to help me to overcome my little poor life by any means.

Did you come to a border or point of no return? I came to a barrier that I was not permitted to cross; or was sent back against my will Unpretentious, but I knew that I had to finish my life on earth, in proving to myself that I was strong and committed to promote Love on EARTH!

God, Spiritual and Religion:


What importance did you place on your religious/spiritual life prior to your experience? Slightly important to me

What was your religion prior to your experience? Do not know je n'avais aucun avis sur mes choix religieux.

Have your religious practices changed since your experience? Uncertain I still didn't adopt a religion. Anyhow my conclusion is the following: In whatever religion, it's LOVE that is the motor of it. So let’s be HAPPY AND LOVE EACH OTHER!

What importance do you place on your religious/spiritual life after your experience? Greatly important to me

What is your religion now? Do not know Aujourd'hui, je crois en une forme de force émanant de la Nature. en une protection divine (quelque soi sa provenance). Je suis plus réceptive aux paraboles religieuses d'où qu'elles proviennent ...

Did your experience include features consistent with your earthly beliefs? Content that was both consistent and not consistent with the beliefs you had at the time of your experience I had no religion, partly repressed the messages of beyond. I feared death, suffering, and was not consistent with all my past and unfounded truths, I think that it's in the simplicity of acceptation that I succeeded to find my ways of life.

Did you have a change in your values and beliefs because of your experience? Yes I'm much more receptive to religion, whatever kind of religion.

The experience included: Presence of unearthly beings

Did you seem to encounter a mystical being or presence, or hear an unidentifiable voice? I encountered a definite being, or a voice clearly of mystical or unearthly origin

Did you see deceased or religious spirits? No

Did you encounter or become aware of any beings who previously lived on earth who are described by name in religions (for example: Jesus, Muhammad, Buddha, etc.)? Uncertain The being that I could meet, looked, after all, like Jesus.

During your experience, did you gain information about premortal existence? Uncertain I covered part of my life as a woman and mother that was before my experience.

During your experience, did you gain information about universal connection or oneness? Uncertain I was always very sensitive with the paranormal without wanting it or working on it. I perceive messages of deceased persons, or people in danger, without being able to control their happening. So this appearance seemed in some way normal to me, but still very intense during the experience.

Did you believe in the existence of God prior to your experience? I was uncertain if God exists

During your experience, did you gain information about the existence of God? Yes As I approached this experience, which was in a rather supernatural climate, even religious, with the encounter with the being appearing at the end of the bed.

Do you believe in the existence of God after your experience? God definitely exists

Concerning our Earthly lives other than Religion:


During your experience, did you gain special knowledge or information about your purpose? Yes To open the doors that seem closed and let the light come in through them.

Did you believe that our earthly lives are meaningful and significant prior to your experience? Are probably meaningful and significant

During your experience, did you gain information about the meaning of life? Yes The choice to continue towards the light was indicating interior peace, fullness, and the return towards terrestrial life: pain, but also the chance to come back to it with a knowledge and healthy knowing’s for leaving one or more messages of PEACE around me.

Did you believe in an afterlife prior to your experience? An afterlife probably exists

Do you believe in an afterlife after your experience? An afterlife definitely exists Uncertain Only the fact that we have the choice at this precise moment, or that we are given the choice to come back to EARTH or leave it.

Did you fear death prior to your experience? I moderately feared death

Do you fear death after your experience? I do not fear death

Were you fearful living your life prior to your experience? Moderately fearful in living my earthly life

Were you fearful living your life after your experience? Not fearful in living my earthly life

Did you believe that our earthly lives are meaningful and significant prior to your experience? Are probably meaningful and significant

Did you believe that our earthly lives are meaningful and significant after your experience? Are meaningful and significant

Did you gain information about how to live our lives? Yes Never to feel ALONE. Getting to know that beyond our families, we are accompanied and guided.

During your experience, did you gain information about life's difficulties, challenges and hardships? Yes See 'meaning or purpose' response above.

Were you compassionate prior to your experience? Greatly compassionate toward others

During your experience, did you gain information about love? Yes Of course! But it is there that I also lack the words. It's unconditional LOVE, a look without any judgment. I don't know how to describe this state.

Were you compassionate after your experience? Greatly compassionate toward others

What life changes occurred in your life after your experience? Large changes in my life. I like to go to mass from time to time, reading a book about unbelievable destinies, about matters focusing on psychology. I always loved nature, but now I feel the vibrations of the trees, the suffering of a plant or an animal, I'm sure to get in contact with them

Have your relationships changed specifically because of your experience? Yes I feel stronger, I feel protected, what caused to exchange my life, which was full of violence, for a life on a sailboat in the West Indies. My relationships with others are special, as today I have the impression having proved to my children and parents that I loved them, and now I have this urge to travel the world, to explore nature with no accountability towards anybody. I have this strange feeling that I had left there, where I had to go at the time of this experience. But I try to understand my mission on this earth, if there really there is a mission.

After the NDE:


Was the experience difficult to express in words? Yes I cannot find the correct adjectives to describe the man and this evanescent light.

How accurately do you remember the experience in comparison to other life events that occurred around the time of the experience? I remember the experience more accurately than other life events that occurred around the time of the experience At the beginning I didn't talk about, and now I find myself years later, talking quite freely around me except to people being mentally fragile, and as if the experience was yesterday, it's inscribed in me like a tattoo on my soul.

Do you have any psychic, non-ordinary or other special gifts after your experience that you did not have before the experience? Yes Premonitory dreams, I always felt being a receiver of messages from deceased people, often messages of love and forgiveness. Today this has intensified.

Are there one or several parts of your experience that are especially meaningful or significant to you? The appearance of the divine being, the feeling of universal Love, and the courage of one’s own deeds.

Have you ever shared this experience with others? Yes I succeeded to talk about it one year after, first to my family, they believed me and listened, as my mother also has a gift of 'clairvoyance', if I can say so. Around myself, I must have been convincing as nobody opposed my saying. But nobody surrounding me had experienced such an experience. In fact I influenced many battered women, or who had been unhappy in their lives. I wrote an autobiography honoring this experience. It will be published this year.

Did you have any knowledge of near death experience (NDE) prior to your experience? Yes But I was doubting, with thoughts like, wouldn't it be chemical, the body wouldn't it be going into a chemical phase in order to avoid pain? Or other questions, more mechanical than spiritual.

What did you believe about the reality of your experience shortly (days to weeks) after it happened? Experience was definitely real For me it is quite real, and the concern with that is that I often feel like being in doubles, the terrestrial part and the one that is no more terrestrial, I rather prefer to name it astral. I'm there without being there. It is a situation that sometimes is embarrassing me in front of others; but that I nevertheless love to take refuge.

What do you believe about the reality of your experience now? Experience was definitely real

At any time in your life, has anything ever reproduced any part of the experience? Yes I'm giving you the name of my autobiography: 'LE GALET' (The pebble), which will be published with ’Editions du Menhir' and you will notice all the doors that opened for me, to make room for my new life, following that experience.

Is there anything else that you would like to add about your experience? I don't know if many people lived such an experience, but I have the impression that I had been chosen by this Man of LOVE, in order to make a good being of me. I would so much love to meet people having experienced it, and whose life toppled over in a better dimension. I just tell you: HURRAY FOR LIFE! Let’s not fear death.