Experience Description:

My partner and I had a long distance relationship. He was three hundred miles away when he was called into hospital urgently about some results of a test he'd had. He went to see his doctor, stood to shake the doctor's hand upon leaving and as he did so, he collapsed. It was a result of a severe allergic reaction from medication he was on. Anyway, they lost him and he had to be brought back.

My partner Alan had called me before going to hospital to say that he'd been called in, but at the time sounded perfectly well.

Sometime later, I was sat at home with my grandmother, whom I then lived with, eating my tea when all of sudden I 'spaced out', I can only explain it as going into a different form of consciousness. There were lots of bright very vivid colors, colors I can't put names too and weirdly a carousel.

It turns out, after speaking to Alan after he had come through the event, the experience I had, had happened at the exact time he collapsed, and we had both seen the same thing. I wasn't totally shocked as Alan and I had often shared dreams and often said and thought things at the same time, but Alan who'd been into astral projection, OBE's etc. for years just said that 'I needed you with me'. We never talked about it again.

I first encountered my soul mate/twin flame seven years ago. I dreamt of this man from the age of three or four and as soon as I met him I knew who it was. I loved him the second we make contact, and I would do anything for him. Even at that point, I loved him more than I loved anyone, my family, and my closest friends. Everything about him was exactly the same as how he had always appeared to me. Not appeared in a physical sense, I never visually saw him in dreams, it was more of an understanding of his soul, his essence - but he was just as I was expecting him to be. Even at such a young age, I knew I was going to meet this man. I knew he would be very spiritual, warm, gentle and kind hearted. I also knew that he would be much older than myself. I even knew the outcome. That he would become gravely ill and that I would take care of him up until his death, which was exactly what I ended up doing. We had a shared NDE (number 622 on the NDE page ), we shared dreams, said the same things at the same time, go to call at the same time, had numerous signs and coincidences even though for the most part we were three hundred miles apart. We liked the same things, had the same opinions, same character traits. When he got ill, although not as severe as this, I experienced many of his symptoms even often when not knowing he was having them. For example, when an acute attack of pancreatitis came upon him, I got aching pains in this region. When he felt sick, I came over nauseous. When he was upset, I'd intuitively know, sometimes even spontaneously cry myself and phone him out the blue, sometimes at 2:00 or 3:00 am - and I was always right in doing so. Even after death for a good twelve months, we still had an incredible spiritual connection. I had strong, lucid dreams of him and ADC's in many forms. I woke up the exact moment he died (as soon as I'd woken I knew what had happened), I had lights flickering, TV's switching themselves on and off, pictures moving - too many things to mention. It's stopped now because I'm having great difficulty in moving on and I think in a sense his continued contact after a point was making it impossible for me to let go which I know I must do, but I know even still that he's always around me.

Background Information:

Gender: Female

Date NDE Occurred: December 2001

NDE Elements:

At the time of your experience, was there an associated life-threatening event? Yes Illness Allergic reaction Life threatening event, but not clinical death

How do you consider the content of your experience? Wonderful

Did you feel separated from your body? No I lost awareness of my body

How did your highest level of consciousness and alertness during the experience compare to your normal everyday consciousness and alertness? More consciousness and alertness than normal I just felt more alive, and I kind of felt like everything was for a reason, and at that moment I understood what that reason was. Everything made sense.

At what time during the experience were you at your highest level of consciousness and alertness? The colors.

Were your thoughts speeded up? Neither

Did time seem to speed up or slow down? Neither There didn't seem to be any 'time'.

Were your senses more vivid than usual? Incredibly more so

Please compare your hearing during the experience to your everyday hearing that you had immediately prior to the time of the experience. I don't remember hearing any sound.

Did you seem to be aware of things going on elsewhere? Yes, and the facts have been checked out

Did you pass into or through a tunnel? Yes

Did you see any beings in your experience? Neither

Did you encounter or become aware of any deceased (or alive) beings? No

Did you see, or feel surrounded by, a brilliant light? A light clearly of mystical or other-worldly origin

Did you see an unearthly light? Yes

Did you seem to enter some other, unearthly world? Clearly mystical or unearthly realm

What emotions did you feel during the experience? Tranquility. Euphoria. Enlightenment.

Did you have a feeling of peace or pleasantness? Incredible peace or pleasantness

Did you have a feeling of joy? Incredible joy

Did you feel a sense of harmony or unity with the universe? United, one with the world

Did you suddenly seem to understand everything? Everything about the universe

Did scenes from your past come back to you? Neither

Did scenes from the future come to you? Neither

Did you come to a border or point of no return? Neither

God, Spiritual and Religion:

What was your religion prior to your experience? Liberal spiritual

Have your religious practices changed since your experience? No

What is your religion now? Liberal spiritual

Did you have a change in your values and beliefs because of your experience? No

Did you seem to encounter a mystical being or presence, or hear an unidentifiable voice? Neither

Did you see deceased or religious spirits? Neither

Concerning our Earthly lives other than Religion

During your experience, did you gain special knowledge or information about your purpose? Yes

Have your relationships changed specifically because of your experience? No

After the NDE:

Was the experience difficult to express in words? Uncertain It was unworldly. Too much too explain.

Do you have any psychic, non-ordinary or other special gifts after your experience that you did not have before the experience? No

Are there one or several parts of your experience that are especially meaningful or significant to you? The fact that it was shared, and not in a sense my own experience made it very special. Especially since the event, Alan has since died.

Have you ever shared this experience with others? No

Did you have any knowledge of near death experience (NDE) prior to your experience? No

What did you believe about the reality of your experience shortly (days to weeks) after it happened? Experience was definitely real

What do you believe about the reality of your experience now? Experience was definitely real

At any time in your life, has anything ever reproduced any part of the experience? No