I had two experiences, one when I was 15, during one of the many surgeries I underwent after a serious traffic accident, and later one when I was 22, when I was giving birth to my daughter. Both times, I clearly heard the surgeons talking to each other, saying, ‘We are losing her. It’s over. We'll never be able to get her back.’ I saw them very clearly and tried to speak to them. Then I was gone very fast, as if I had been sucked into a very brightly lit corridor, where I seemed to be swimming through a white liquid toward a very intense light that I felt very attracted to. I just wanted to go there so much. I felt more and more ‘sucked,’ toward it, but then just as abruptly, I sped backward very fast, away from the light. I felt shaken in all directions, still with that sucking feeling. In both cases, I awoke very quickly in the hospital recovery room.
Date NDE Occurred: '1973,1982'
At the time of your experience, was there an associated life-threatening event? Yes Surgery-related Clinical death (cessation of breathing or heart function or brain function)
With each surgery, it was the last attempt.
How do you consider the content of your experience? Wonderful
Did you feel separated from your body? Yes
I lost awareness of my body
How did your highest level of consciousness and alertness during the experience compare to your normal everyday consciousness and alertness? More consciousness and alertness than normal
At what time during the experience were you at your highest level of consciousness and alertness? At the experience's beginning and when I came back.
Were your thoughts speeded up? Faster than usual
Did time seem to speed up or slow down? Everything seemed to be happening at once; or time stopped or lost all meaning
Time seemed very short to me, although the surgeries had lasted for several hours.
Were your senses more vivid than usual? Incredibly more vivid
Please compare your vision during the experience to your everyday vision that you had immediately prior to the time of the experience. I saw details more clearly and without glasses, although I am very near-sighted.
Please compare your hearing during the experience to your everyday hearing that you had immediately prior to the time of the experience. My hearing was very sensitive. I could hear surgery tools rubbing, the surgeons breathing...
Did you seem to be aware of things going on elsewhere? Yes, and the facts have been checked out
Did you pass into or through a tunnel? Yes A very narrow tunnel with blurry looking, but quite solid, walls, which I felt myself bumping against.
Did you see any beings in your experience? I actually saw them
Did you encounter or become aware of any deceased (or alive) beings? No
The experience included: Light
Did you see, or feel surrounded by, a brilliant light? A light clearly of mystical or other-worldly origin
Did you see an unearthly light? Yes Very bright – it was at the far end of the tunnel – white, blinding.
Did you seem to enter some other, unearthly world? No
The experience included: Strong emotional tone
What emotions did you feel during the experience? Scared at first, and then, great peace. The second experience was all peaceful.
Did you have a feeling of peace or pleasantness? Relief or calmness
Did you have a feeling of joy? Happiness
Did you feel a sense of harmony or unity with the universe? I felt united or one with the world
The experience included: Special Knowledge
Did you suddenly seem to understand everything? Everything about the universe
Did scenes from your past come back to you? My past flashed before me, out of my control
Did scenes from the future come to you? Scenes from the world's future
Did you come to a border or point of no return? I came to a barrier that I was not permitted to cross; or was sent back against my will
God, Spiritual and Religion:
What was your religion prior to your experience? Moderate
Have your religious practices changed since your experience? No
What is your religion now? Moderate
Did you have a change in your values and beliefs because of your experience? No
Did you seem to encounter a mystical being or presence, or hear an unidentifiable voice? I encountered a definite being, or a voice clearly of mystical or unearthly origin
Did you see deceased or religious spirits? I actually saw them
Concerning our Earthly lives other than Religion:
During your experience, did you gain special knowledge or information about your purpose? No
Have your relationships changed specifically because of your experience? No
After the NDE:
Was the experience difficult to express in words? No
Do you have any psychic, non-ordinary or other special gifts after your experience that you did not have before the experience? Yes I gained an improved capacity for listening to others. I now have a real 'clairvoyant' gift for knowing about the past and the future about which I 'see' images, and colors. I feel people's emotions when they are talking to me, and sometimes I can hardly keep myself from expressing all the thoughts and feelings I'm getting from them.
Are there one or several parts of your experience that are especially meaningful or significant to you? I believe that on both occurrences, it was not my 'time' to die because I still had things to do.
Have you ever shared this experience with others? Yes I shared my first experience with my friends and family. But when I told them about the second one, they did not believe me.
Did you have any knowledge of near death experience (NDE) prior to your experience? No
What did you believe about the reality of your experience shortly (days to weeks) after it happened? Experience was definitely real Like a state of grace, a new opportunity was granted to me.
What do you believe about the reality of your experience now? Experience was definitely real I now have to keep fighting against the pain I endure, which is caused by the serious disabilities I suffer from my accident, so I can to listen to problems of others, especially those of my dear ones, and offer them some assistance.
At any time in your life, has anything ever reproduced any part of the experience? No
Is there anything else that you would like to add about your experience? I wish that more people who are close to their last moment would have this experience. It could bring them, as it has brought me, hope and gratitude for life (though we don't really know what life is.)
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