Experience Description

I had been feeling pain in my left hip for fifteen years. I had told the doctors about my hip many times, but they always said it was just 'aging.' My hip had always gotten a lot of use, as I had always been very adventurous and active, canoeing the rivers of the Yukon, scuba diving all over the word, including Antarctica. I was one of the first women ever to scuba dive there in the year 2000. I had been an avid runner for twenty years, had traveled extensively and was now teaching Pilates, when I noticed a change in my hip, which had started to feel 'weird'. I thought it was a pinched nerve, but on Sunday in Sept 2012, I had four seizures in one day. One of those times, my left leg was stuck in a weird position and I fell over in extreme pain.

The next day I went to my doctor and told her about this and demanded an MRI of my brain. One half-hour after my MRI, she told me I had a tumor the size of a lemon in my parietal lobe. I wanted the tumor out and everything was expedited at this point. Two days later, I had a ten-inch craniotomy, and had a biopsy, and they tried, but they could not remove all of the tumor because it was too deep. [med: Craniotomy: a surgical operation in which a bone flap is temporarily removed from the skull to access the brain.] I think I was in shock. They said it would take two weeks for the biopsy results.

During the second surgery, I had an epiphany about Jesus. I felt enormous love from him and I felt horribly sorry I had not gotten closer to him during my life. When I would close my eyes, I would see a white light. I felt it was God looking at me and caring for me—and that Jesus was literally holding me. I felt safe, but the pain was horrible due to an allergy to morphine.

My brother flew in, and he would sit by my side and pray. As I listened to him, I felt comfort, but still, the pain got in the way. There is more to this story, but I am home now, and I am in a watch-and-wait situation. I have brain cancer: Oligodendroglioma II [med. info: Type two is low grade, slow to change, and generally does not spread beyond the brain.] My life has changed. I am a better person because of the cancer. I have faith that I will be fine, even with the cancer in my head. God helped me and is helping me. I am fine.

Background Information:

Gender: Female

Date NDE Occurred: Oct 7 2013

NDE Elements:

At the time of your experience, was there an associated life-threatening event? Uncertain Illness 'Life threatening event, but not clinical death'

How do you consider the content of your experience? Both pleasant AND distressing

The experience included: Out of body experience

Did you feel separated from your body? Uncertain I lost awareness of my body

How did your highest level of consciousness and alertness during the experience compare to your normal everyday consciousness and alertness? Less consciousness and alertness than normal When it happened, I was in a daze. I was just out of surgery.

At what time during the experience were you at your highest level of consciousness and alertness? Not really

Were your thoughts speeded up? Faster than usual

Did time seem to speed up or slow down? Everything seemed to be happening at once; or time stopped or lost all meaning It was crazy-weird, that brain surgery.

Were your senses more vivid than usual? Incredibly more vivid

Please compare your vision during the experience to your everyday vision that you had immediately prior to the time of the experience. It was a feeling/vision, much more profound than an everyday experience.

Please compare your hearing during the experience to your everyday hearing that you had immediately prior to the time of the experience. My hearing was sensitive. I had brain surgery, and everything sounded loud. I needed quiet, and that stayed the same throughout the experience.

Did you seem to be aware of things going on elsewhere? No

Did you pass into or through a tunnel? No But I saw a tunnel. I was on my side of the tunnel.

Did you see any beings in your experience? I sensed their presence

Did you encounter or become aware of any deceased (or alive) beings? No

The experience included: Unearthly light

Did you see, or feel surrounded by, a brilliant light? No

Did you see an unearthly light? Yes A bright light, very bright white/yellow.

Did you seem to enter some other, unearthly world? No

The experience included: Hellish imagery

What emotions did you feel during the experience? Happiness and sadness.

Did you have a feeling of peace or pleasantness? Relief or calmness

Did you have a feeling of joy? Happiness

Did you feel a sense of harmony or unity with the universe? No

Did you suddenly seem to understand everything? Everything about the universe I felt I knew everything, but not in an arrogant way. I felt I could know everything and never even say a word about it—no reason to prove myself. I felt so at peace with that!

Did scenes from your past come back to you? I remembered many past events

Did scenes from the future come to you? No

Did you come to a border or point of no return? No

God, Spiritual and Religion:


What importance did you place on your religious/spiritual life prior to your experience? Moderately important to me

What was your religion prior to your experience? Christian- Protestant Cristian but not practicing

Have your religious practices changed since your experience? Yes I started attending a church I had been looking at for some time. I am involved in projects, and I am honored to be speaking on Easter Sunday about my experience.

What importance do you place on your religious/spiritual life after your experience? Greatly important to me

What is your religion now? Christian- Protestant Devout Christian at this time

Did your experience include features consistent with your earthly beliefs? Content that was entirely consistent with the beliefs you had at the time of your experience the experience brought everything together....................like an undone puzzle.........it was now complete......and it felt good.

Did you have a change in your values and beliefs because of your experience? Yes My values have always been good, but they are better now. I do not talk poorly about anyone or thing. I stay on the high ground—but I stay humble.

Did you seem to encounter a mystical being or presence, or hear an unidentifiable voice? I encountered a definite being, or a voice clearly of mystical or unearthly origin Jesus, who was literally holding me.

Did you see deceased or religious spirits? I sensed their presence

Did you encounter or become aware of any beings who previously lived on earth who are described by name in religions (for example: Jesus, Muhammad, Buddha, etc.)? Yes Jesus, literally holding me.

During your experience, did you gain information about premortal existence? Uncertain

During your experience, did you gain information about universal connection or oneness? Uncertain

Did you believe in the existence of God prior to your experience? God definitely exists

During your experience, did you gain information about the existence of God? Yes I FELT Jesus' arms holding me.....I felt touch

Do you believe in the existence of God after your experience? God definitely exists

Concerning our Earthly lives other than Religion:


During your experience, did you gain special knowledge or information about your purpose? Yes 'Just being' and loving, too.

Did you believe that our earthly lives are meaningful and significant prior to your experience? Are meaningful and significant

During your experience, did you gain information about the meaning of life? Yes I felt clearly what was important........God, my family and friends, earth, that the mundane is awesome.......sweeping, mowing, cleaning, making the bed, belly laughter, .....

Did you believe in an afterlife prior to your experience? An afterlife probably exists┬

Do you believe in an afterlife after your experience? An afterlife definitely exists Uncertain

Did you fear death prior to your experience? I greatly feared death

Do you fear death after your experience? I do not fear death

Were you fearful living your life prior to your experience? Not fearful in living my earthly life

Were you fearful living your life after your experience? Not fearful in living my earthly life

Did you believe that our earthly lives are meaningful and significant prior to your experience? Are meaningful and significant

Did you believe that our earthly lives are meaningful and significant after your experience? Are meaningful and significant

Did you gain information about how to live our lives? Uncertain Spirituality simplicity God, family and friends , in that order. less is more

During your experience, did you gain information about life's difficulties, challenges and hardships? Uncertain

Were you compassionate prior to your experience? Moderately compassionate toward others

During your experience, did you gain information about love? Uncertain

Were you compassionate after your experience? Greatly compassionate toward others

What life changes occurred in your life after your experience? Large changes in my life My life is better than it ever has been. I am grateful for everything and everyone. I try to do my very best every day with everyone and I do something nice for someone every day. I drop/skip the small stuff. I have no time for anger or resentments. I have made amends to anyone I may have hurt along the way. Life is really good right now—even with cancer!

Have your relationships changed specifically because of your experience? Yes Yes More loving, caring, meaningful, and full. I am one lucky person. I am blessed, so very, very blessed.

After the NDE:


Was the experience difficult to express in words? No It was very clear and still is.

How accurately do you remember the experience in comparison to other life events that occurred around the time of the experience? I remember the experience more accurately than other life events that occurred around the time of the experience I remember it more accurately because it was sooooooooooooooooooooo powerful.

Do you have any psychic, non-ordinary or other special gifts after your experience that you did not have before the experience? No

Are there one or several parts of your experience that are especially meaningful or significant to you? Before: standing up for myself, demanding an MRI. During: My visits with Jesus. After: My continuing work with spirituality.

Have you ever shared this experience with others? Yes I am also speaking to my church on Easter. I believe I can help people because I have a set of tools that makes hardship better. I have power.

Did you have any knowledge of near death experience (NDE) prior to your experience? No

What did you believe about the reality of your experience shortly (days to weeks) after it happened? Experience was definitely real It is part of me. It is real. I don't even have to explain myself, it is so real.

What do you believe about the reality of your experience now? Experience was definitely real Too powerful to ignore.

At any time in your life, has anything ever reproduced any part of the experience? Yes A near-death drowning while scuba diving.

Is there anything else that you would like to add about your experience? I am grateful. I am not afraid to die, and I love life more than ever before.

Are there any other questions that we could ask to help you communicate your experience? I want to help people. I have the power and tools to do it. You can pass this along.