I went to a friend’s house, at the time I was unaware that her boyfriend suspected we had more than just a friendship (but we did not). Her boyfriend was a drug addict and heavy drinker. It was just the three of us at their apartment and her boyfriend was being extra nice and offered me a drink, I accepted as it was Thanksgiving 2003. About 30 minutes later, I began to feel strange; it felt like a heavy uncontrollable shaking internally and then I felt extremely tired and dizzy and could not control what was happening. My friend’s boyfriend began to ask me ‘what's wrong, how do you feel?’ I replied, ‘what did you do to me?’ I sensed that I was going to die. He was trying to lure me into the bathroom, trying to convince me that I should take a bath. I knew that this was planned and could not tell if my friend was aware of her boyfriend's plans. By look on her face, she was scared, which made me more frightened. I felt the urge to kill her boyfriend before I was going to die. The feeling was getting worse so I walked out of the apartment and tried to find help. I only lived a few streets away and had left my cell phone at home. I started to lose the sense of time because before I knew it I was home. I had grabbed my cell phone and for some reason called a friend who could help in the event of my death. I left a message giving details. At this point, I could not stand up. I lay on my bed and closed my eyes. This was Thursday between 3 pm and 5 pm. I could not tell you exactly. As I lay on my bed, all I felt was my breaths getting shorter.The next moment I was drifting through a grayish tunnel of clouds. I felt like I had a body but could not feel it. (It has been so long I am sure I have lost memory of some of the details.) What stood out was the clouds seem to have beings guiding me through. Then this bright light, which would be normally blinding to the human eye, was in front of me. I heard my grandmother’s voice calling me and then she slowly came into focus and greeted me. She told me that I have to ‘turn around and go back, this is not your time’. I still ‘have to do what you were meant to do on earth’. If I pass her, I will ‘not be able to return’. She knew that I could feel the love and peace; but she also felt that I was afraid. She told me the fear that I was feeling is the guilt of leaving before doing what I was meant to do. I understood and felt like this was more of a lesson that was being taught. She said she will always watch over me.In an instant, I was gasping for air and had the worse headache that I ever experienced until this day. This headache was so bad I must have passed out again. When I finally awoke, I still had an awful headache and was extremely thirsty. The ring of my cellphone later awakened me but I had missed the call. I then realized that I had over 20 missed calls and it was now Saturday 7 pm. I called my friend and told him I was okay.Once the headache was gone, I felt connected to the universe and was more aware of everything. I had the love that I brought back with me and the knowledge of knowing I am being watched over; I have a purpose. I considered Thanksgiving being like a ‘new’ birthday.
Date NDE Occurred: Thanksgiving 2003
At the time of your experience, was there an associated life-threatening event? Uncertain Criminal attack. Drug or medication overdose. 'Life threatening event, but not clinical death'
How do you consider the content of your experience? Both pleasant AND distressing
The experience included: Out of body experience
Did you feel separated from your body? Yes My grandmother was speaking to me.
I lost awareness of my body
How did your highest level of consciousness and alertness during the experience compare to your normal everyday consciousness and alertness? More consciousness and alertness than normal
At what time during the experience were you at your highest level of consciousness and alertness? When I was speaking with my grandmother.
Were your thoughts speeded up? Faster than usual
Did time seem to speed up or slow down? Everything seemed to be happening at once; or time stopped or lost all meaning
I had no awareness of time.
Were your senses more vivid than usual? More vivid than usual
Please compare your vision during the experience to your everyday vision that you had immediately prior to the time of the experience. I can’t express the comparison.
Please compare your hearing during the experience to your everyday hearing that you had immediately prior to the time of the experience. I can’t express the comparison.
Did you seem to be aware of things going on elsewhere? No
The experience included: Tunnel
Did you pass into or through a tunnel? Yes More like a tunnel of clouds from grey then it got lighter until I reached my grandmother and what I believe was the ‘point of no return’ if you choose to pass.
The experience included: Presence of deceased persons
Did you see any beings in your experience? I actually saw them
Did you encounter or become aware of any deceased (or alive) beings? Yes My grandmother.
The experience included: Unearthly light
Did you see, or feel surrounded by, a brilliant light? A light clearly of mystical or other-worldly origin
Did you see an unearthly light? Yes Bright light that would be considered blinding yet it did not.
Did you seem to enter some other, unearthly world? No I never got past the tunnel.
The experience included: Strong emotional tone
What emotions did you feel during the experience? Peace, love, so much love and calmness but hints of fear.
Did you have a feeling of peace or pleasantness? Relief or calmness
Did you have a feeling of joy? Happiness
Did you feel a sense of harmony or unity with the universe? I felt united or one with the world
The experience included: Special knowledge or purpose
Did you suddenly seem to understand everything? Everything about the universe I felt like the universe and everything are connected and we are part of something greater. I felt like we are born here to collect life's experiences and bring them with us to what comes next. Tasks are assigned to us, I am not sure it was a feeling that I cannot express in our language.
Did scenes from your past come back to you? No
Did scenes from the future come to you? No
The experience included: Boundary
Did you reach a boundary or limiting physical structure? No
Did you come to a border or point of no return? I came to a barrier that I was not permitted to cross; or was sent back against my will
God, Spiritual and Religion:
What importance did you place on your religious/spiritual life prior to your experience? Slightly important to me
What was your religion prior to your experience? Unaffiliated- Nothing in particular- Religious unaffiliated
Have your religious practices changed since your experience? No
What importance do you place on your religious/spiritual life after your experience? Slightly important to me
What is your religion now? Unaffiliated- Nothing in particular- Religious unaffiliated
Did your experience include features consistent with your earthly beliefs? Content that was both consistent and not consistent with the beliefs you had at the time of your experience
Did you have a change in your values and beliefs because of your experience? No
Did you seem to encounter a mystical being or presence, or hear an unidentifiable voice? I encountered a definite being, or a voice clearly of mystical or unearthly origin My grandmother.
Did you see deceased or religious spirits? I actually saw them
Did you encounter or become aware of any beings who previously lived on earth who are described by name in religions (for example: Jesus, Muhammad, Buddha, etc.)? No
During your experience, did you gain information about premortal existence? No
During your experience, did you gain information about universal connection or oneness? Yes its and indescribable feeling
Did you believe in the existence of God prior to your experience? God probably exists
During your experience, did you gain information about the existence of God? Uncertain a feeling of something greater
Do you believe in the existence of God after your experience? Unknown
Concerning our Earthly lives other than Religion:
During your experience, did you gain special knowledge or information about your purpose? Uncertain A feeling of something greater. It’s an indescribable feeling.
Did you believe that our earthly lives are meaningful and significant prior to your experience? Are possibly meaningful and significant
During your experience, did you gain information about the meaning of life? Uncertain i was told that i have purpose but was not told what it was and i believe everyone has a purpose and somehow its all connected
Did you believe in an afterlife prior to your experience? I was uncertain if an afterlife exists
Do you believe in an afterlife after your experience? I am uncertain if an afterlife exists No
Did you fear death prior to your experience? I greatly feared death
Do you fear death after your experience? I greatly fear death
Were you fearful living your life prior to your experience? Slightly fearful in living my earthly life
Were you fearful living your life after your experience? Not fearful in living my earthly life
Did you believe that our earthly lives are meaningful and significant after your experience? Are meaningful and significant
Did you gain information about how to live our lives? No
During your experience, did you gain information about life's difficulties, challenges and hardships? No
Were you compassionate prior to your experience? Moderately compassionate toward others
During your experience, did you gain information about love? Yes love is the main emotion of the experience
Were you compassionate after your experience? Greatly compassionate toward others
What life changes occurred in your life after your experience? Large changes in my life Large changes in my life.
Have your relationships changed specifically because of your experience? No No
After the NDE:
Was the experience difficult to express in words? No
How accurately do you remember the experience in comparison to other life events that occurred around the time of the experience? I remember the experience as accurately as other life events that occurred around the time of the experience
Do you have any psychic, non-ordinary or other special gifts after your experience that you did not have before the experience? No
Are there one or several parts of your experience that are especially meaningful or significant to you? Love is the main emotion of the experience.
Have you ever shared this experience with others? No
Did you have any knowledge of near death experience (NDE) prior to your experience? Yes I've heard of them but did not know details.
What did you believe about the reality of your experience shortly (days to weeks) after it happened? Experience was definitely real
What do you believe about the reality of your experience now? Experience was definitely real
At any time in your life, has anything ever reproduced any part of the experience? Yes In August 2009, I experienced the connection once again. I was driving home from work, (at this point, I now have a 2-year-old baby girl). I was working two jobs and was returning from the second (a 19-hour shift including drive time to and from work.) On my way home from work I dozed off while driving and felt and heard my grandmother as she grabbed my heart and said, ‘Wake up open, your eyes!’ I averted from driving off the road into some trees.
Two weeks after this, the day after my actual birthday, my girlfriend (the mother of my child) whom I lived with, got into a car accident and passed away. I am now a single dad with a 5-year-old girl. I now know why it was not my time and know part of my purpose here on earth.
Is there anything else that you would like to add about your experience? I remember the experience as accurately as other life events that occurred around the time of the experience. Content that was both consistent and not consistent with the beliefs you had at the time of your experience.
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