Dakota F Probable NDE

Experience Description

I would like to start out by saying that I give full permission to use my entire name if you decide to publish this account. I would also like to disclose that the entry was copy and pasted from a 'supernatural story submission' form I filled out for an online series.

When I was about eleven years old, I committed suicide. There was a lot going on at the time that weighed heavily on me. To keep this story somewhat short I won't go into too many details; but I will say that I am effectively cut off from most of my blood family because I helped put several of them and people in their close circles who either knew about, or helped cover, the situations in prison. Though some of you will try to mock the circumstances, add this to targeted attacks at school just because I was taller than everyone else and it becomes difficult to handle. One night I finally had enough and decided to end it all. That was the moment things started to turn, and I knew that something bigger was at play.

The moment I started to feel my life slipping away, something happened which seemed to freeze time. I honestly can't say for sure if this was because I was dead, or just barely on the edge, but what happened next completely overloaded my senses as a bright blue flash of light appeared from nowhere. It seemed to transport me to another place entirely!

When my eyes finally adjusted, I could see that I was in the middle of this blue abyss, for lack of better word. There was absolutely nothing around me at all. I was just floating in space. I tried moving but it only seemed like my eyes were able to move. I took a few moments to study my surroundings and noticed that light, the air, and even space itself seemed to flow like I was underwater.

Suddenly, out of nowhere, this man appeared before me. His image was blurry, but I was able to make out a few details as he approached me. He was tall, had long brown hair, wore a white robe, and just seemed to emit this caring vibe. I could sense he was concerned about my wellbeing but didn't judge my actions. He stopped roughly ten feet away from me, smiled, and said 'Dakota, there's someone here to see you.' The man stepped aside, and what he showed me is perhaps the most life-changing thing I have seen yet!

Standing behind the man was a little girl, just crying while she stared at me. I felt my heart drop at the sight of her, filled with guilt about what I was doing. I watch her as she runs up to me simply mesmerized when I started to see she looked a lot like me. My body dropped as whatever held me in place let go just enough to let me embrace the child. I felt her body slam into me, her tears soaking my chest, and her entire being simply shake as she choked on her words. Simple seconds felt like an eternity as I held her close, trying to find the right words to say. The little girl wiggles herself free just enough for her to look me in the eyes. She eventually spoke to me, leaving me with words that still weigh on my heart to this day.

'Daddy, please don't do it.'

I was too shocked to say anything more. The child must've known this, as she leaned in to give me a kiss on the cheek. Something about the feeling of her lips against my skin was enough for the 'vision' to end. I open my eyes to find myself just sitting on my bed as I was moments before I made the choice to harm myself. What had just happened was too magnificent for me to process at the time, it's still difficult for me to find the appropriate words to describe it. So I just went to bed in order to sleep on it, only to have the exact vision play again in my dreams.

Most I've told this story to assumed that was the last I'd hear of the strange man or the ethereal little girl. Obviously they don't know me very well. I had to know what happened to me. Who was that man? Was that little girl in fact my daughter? I had to know. My findings, or at least the theories I've gathered since then, only added to the mystery. It was also where I fully realized that what I had been experiencing all my life was not normal.

I started my search on the little girl to see if she was in fact my daughter. Knowing that the only way I'd likely know for sure was the day I was in the hospital delivery room, I figured I could at least settle to trying to see how and why she was able to appear to me in the first place. The closest situations I could find were parents already expecting a child getting either visions or phantom visitations from the kid. It makes sense, but there was one problem... I didn't even have my first kiss yet. If a woman was out there, carrying my child, then there are bigger problems at hand.

Since my search for answers into understanding why the little girl appeared seemed to hit dead ends I shifted focus to the man. Who was he? How did he know me? How did he even tie into this? I had a few ideas coming together, but I thought it would be smarter if I consulted my various mentors I met over the years to get better insights. Psychic mediums, priests, demonologists, other investigators, even a few therapists all came to the same conclusion. That man who appeared, wasn't human. All signs seemed to point that the man was actually an archangel. Archangel Michael, to be exact.

Needless to say the idea that an Archangel intervened to bring me back from the dead, on at least four occasions, was overwhelming. I was just a kid from the small town of Murtaugh, Idaho. The only thing that seemed 'special' about me was that I just happened to be a foot taller than my peers. I tried asking why this all happened but the best I could ever get was along the lines of, 'Be patient. It's God's plan for you.'

I was running out of ideas on what else to do in order to get answers. I even tried summoning both the little girl and Michael to get more information but was only fed bits and pieces of information. This left me with my only option of living out the rest of life as I normally would just hoping I would get some sort of clue. The little girl would keep appearing at times when my life was put on the line, or just to try giving me a boost when I started feeling down again. Her appearances became so frequent that I gave her a name, since it felt wrong just calling her 'the little girl' over and over again. The first name that would come to mind was Olivia, which I asked her if she was okay with and she said she loved it. Up until recently there were two more incidents where Olivia made an appearance that gave me more clues about how to bring her into my life, most importantly finding out who her mother is.

The first was the day I lost my grandfather to cancer. I had to help keep the other kids and my grandmother's dogs cornered off in a bedroom just so emergency personnel would have room to do what they needed to do. Olivia appeared in the room where my grandpa was lying and taking his last breaths of life, and managed to let me use her eyes to see my grandfather's soul leave his body and disappear with the souls that came to get him.

The second incident was when I got into a car accident. The Chrysler 300 I had at the time had an issue with 'bucking' like someone was rapidly slamming on the brakes and the gas at the same time, over and over again. The car started acting up on a bad intersection and caused me to get hit by a pickup truck going sixty miles-per-hour. Moments before I was hit, Olivia appeared and screamed, 'Daddy look out!' On impact I remember seeing the aforementioned, 'blue light,' however it was being blocked by a man's silhouette. Whoever was blocking me spoke and said, 'Be more careful next time, D T.' There was only one person who ever called me by that name, and that was my grandfather.

The final incident took place while I was on a riverboat cruise in Paris back in 2016. I trying to brave the elements to admire the Eiffel Tower light show. Everyone else was in the lower deck, leaving the topside to myself; or so I thought. I felt someone tap on my shoulder, so naturally I reacted thinking it was another tourist asking me to step aside cause I was in the way of a photo. But when I looked behind me, my jaw dropped. The people behind me... were Olivia and my grandfather. I asked them what they were doing there, to which they told me they weren't going to be appearing as much anymore. They further elaborated by saying I wasn't going to need their guidance anymore, but they were going to check in from time to time. My grandpa then said he was proud of me before he disappeared, giving me a few moments alone with Olivia. She started to say goodbye but I stopped her to ask if she could tell me anything about her mother. Olivia told me, 'Don't worry, Daddy. Mommy's coming soon. Just keep fighting, Mommy will need you to fight for her,' before she faded into the night.

There was one woman, who I actually thought was going to be Olivia's mom. I even proposed to her, thinking I was about to finally put an end to an almost decade long search. But, a few months before I left for Paris, she was murdered by the father of the child she was 5 months pregnant with at the time. Olivia hadn't made an appearance before that for almost a year, so it wasn't like I could ask her for confirmation. But hearing her validate the search wasn't over yet was comforting, as was getting to see my grandfather one more time (he was my only stable father figure).

Previous times I told people about this ongoing saga of mine, that was the most information I had to give. Since then there was a possible hit on the identity of Olivia's mother, but that turned out to be a misidentified thoughtform of a woman with serious mental trauma (it's a long story). But for those of you who are curious, yes I do have someone new in my life and every part of me is screaming she is the one.

But that's the tricky part of this ordeal. The fact I got a glimpse into the future is enough to change the course of events. Maybe because I have a direct line to an archangel, it will help things remain unaffected. In fact, it is hard to say how me sharing this will cause things to change, but it seems to help those who hear it. All indications say that as long as I live the life I do and help as many people as I can, then I will get to see my daughter once again and live the life I have always wanted. I guess I should also say that with great confidence that's exactly what's happening.

The situations that dragged me to this point are long over. I have multiple companies, get to use my creative side for regular work, get to help countless people, traveled most of the Northern Hemisphere, have amazing friends, and met the woman of my dreams (who I might have actually wrote about in one of my books roughly four years before we even met). While the situation isn't perfect, life had never been better.

I am almost 24 mow, at the time of writing this. I acknowledge the chance that this entire ordeal might be signs of something seriously wrong in my mind. I also know that many of the theories I have gathered on the supernatural might be proven false, and I'm okay with that. But in spite of that, I also know that our world has so much more to it that meets the eye, and not taking the chance to go explore the possibilities is one of the biggest crimes one can commit to themselves.

Background Information:

Gender: Male

Date NDE Occurred: 2007

NDE Elements:

At the time of your experience, was there an associated life-threatening event? Yes Suicide attempt Life threatening event, but not clinical death I was trying to kill myself

How do you consider the content of your experience? Both pleasant AND distressing

Did you feel separated from your body? No I clearly left my body and existed outside it

How did your highest level of consciousness and alertness during the experience compare to your normal everyday consciousness and alertness? Normal consciousness and alertness The significance and wonder behind my experience, the fact that I knew this shouldn't be possible, basically burned the incidents I described deeper into my brain.

At what time during the experience were you at your highest level of consciousness and alertness? In the moments just before the life-threatening impacts, my alertness was elevated due to fight-or-flight

Were your thoughts speeded up? No

Did time seem to speed up or slow down? Everything seemed to be happening at once; or time stopped or lost all meaning All the times where the light appeared, time didn't really seem to move. However, when I would come back, it would seem like roughly half an hour had gone by.

Were your senses More vivid than usual? More vivid than usual

Please compare your vision during the experience to your everyday vision that you had immediately prior to the time of the experience. My vision wasn't affected, however it almost seemed like light itself was more dispersed than it would be in a three-dimensional world.

Please compare your hearing during the experience to your everyday hearing that you had immediately prior to the time of the experience. My hearing also wasn't affected, per say. I would describe sound moving as if it was in a more open area as compared to confined quarters.

Did you seem to be aware of things going on elsewhere, as if by ESP? No

Did you pass into or through a tunnel? Uncertain Based on what I saw, the descriptions of a tunnel may be simply how the observer noticed the light manifesting. It's like the tunnel, and even the blue lighting I described, might've been a place outside of other worlds.

Did you see any beings in your experience? I actually saw them

Did you encounter or become aware of any deceased (or alive) beings? Yes There was my maternal grandfather. I feel as if I should mention that, even though it isn't directly connected to my experience, there were strange events that surrounded my grandfather's death. About two weeks prior, one of his dogs passed away. The night the dog passed away I had a dream where I was in the backyard of my grandparent's house and the dog was trying to get me to follow it into this mist. As I followed the dog disappeared and then this image appeared in the mist showing my grandfather lying in bed, surrounded by our family. When I woke up I brushed it off as just a weird dream until my mother (I was fourteen at the time of my grandfather's passing) got a call from my grandma telling her that the very same dog just died that night.

Did you see, or feel surrounded by, a brilliant light? A light clearly of mystical or other-worldly origin

Did you see an unearthly light? Yes The blue light, it had nothing to originate from. One might argue that how one's sense become distorted may have made it so the sky above me was twisted to look as if it was some spiritual glow. However, that explanation can only be taken into account in the car accident in which I described.

Did you seem to enter some other, unearthly world? A clearly mystical or unearthly realm Where I seemed to go to, almost felt like it was some sort of passage way between worlds. Someplace where our concepts of time and its restrictions were irrelevant.

What emotions did you feel during the experience? Wonder, shock, sadness, love

Did you have a feeling of peace or pleasantness? No

Did you have a feeling of joy? No

Did you feel a sense of harmony or unity with the universe? No

Did you suddenly seem to understand everything? No

Did scenes from your past come back to you? No

Did scenes from the future come to you? Scenes from my personal future Psychic phenomenon allegedly runs in my family. I didn't necessarily see scenes from the future in those moments but I felt someone from my future grab me as tight as she could.

Did you come to a border or point of no return? No

God, Spiritual and Religion:

What was your religion prior to your experience? Unaffiliated- Agnostic

Have your religious practices changed since your experience? No

What is your religion now? Unaffiliated- Agnostic

Did your experience include features consistent with your earthly beliefs? Content that was entirely not consistent with the beliefs you had at the time of your experience I was always skeptical about angels, demons, ghosts etc... but after this experience I know that there are bigger things out there.

Did you have a change in your values and beliefs because of your experience? No

Did you seem to encounter a mystical being or presence, or hear an unidentifiable voice? I encountered a definite being, or a voice clearly of mystical or unearthly origin As I stated in my story, there was the little girl and the possible Archangel.

Did you see deceased or religious spirits? I actually saw them

Did you encounter or become aware of any beings who previously lived on earth who are described by name in religions (for example: Jesus, Muhammad, Buddha, etc.)? Uncertain At first when I saw, 'the man' I thought it might've been Jesus based on what I saw. After consulting various mentors, they believe it might've been the archangel Michael. Some sources even speculate that Michael and Jesus might've been the same person all along.

During your experience, did you gain information about premortal existence? No

During your experience, did you gain information about universal connection or oneness? No

During your experience, did you gain information about the existence of God? No

Concerning our Earthly lives other than Religion:

During your experience, did you gain special knowledge or information about your purpose? Yes All I knew, is that I could never do anything to hurt that little girl.

During your experience, did you gain information about the meaning of life? No

During your experience, did you gain information about an afterlife? An afterlife definitely exists No

Did you gain information about how to live our lives? No

During your experience, did you gain information about life's difficulties, challenges and hardships? Yes All my life, I had feared becoming like my abusive father. When I heard the little girl call me 'Daddy' it was the sort of revelation that I had a chance to overcome it all.

During your experience, did you gain information about love? Yes It sounds like a cliché but that experience was the first sign I had that love truly was a powerful thing.

What life changes occurred in your life after your experience? Large changes in my life This experience changed everything for me. Because it happened so young and occupied enough of a majority of my life, it's hard to say how it would've been had this happened. I might not be alive today.

Have your relationships changed specifically because of your experience? No

After the NDE:

Was the experience difficult to express in words? Yes The experience itself was overwhelming, especially for a young kid.

How accurately do you remember the experience in comparison to other life events that occurred around the time of the experience? I remember the experience more accurately than other life events that occurred around the time of the experience. The overall 'power' of the experience seemed to help burn the memory further into my head

Do you have any psychic, non-ordinary or other special gifts after your experience that you did not have before the experience? Uncertain Psychic phenomenon allegedly runs through my family, and I was known to be a psychic kid. When I was little, I could always tell who was on the phone before it would ring.

Are there one or several parts of your experience that are especially meaningful or significant to you? The entire ordeal has been significant. I would be worried about anyone who could walk away without having some sort of lingering thoughts about the circumstances behind my experiences.

Have you ever shared this experience with others? Yes It took me a few years to muster up the courage, even the appropriate vocabulary, to describe what I have seen. Part of my hesitation was that the story clearly was still unfolding. So far the reactions have been positive, with a few skeptics here and there (most of which just spout off negative remarks just for the sake of being rude). But quite a few have said that it helped them rethink hurting themselves.

Did you have any knowledge of near death experience (NDE) prior to your experience? No

What did you believe about the reality of your experience shortly (days to weeks) after it happened? Experience was definitely real I didn't know what to think of it. I was just a kid. I'd honestly be quite worried if a child approached me saying they were used to seeing these kinds of things.

What do you believe about the reality of your experience now? Experience was definitely real I try to be open to other explanations as I realize someone may come along and figure out why it happened in the first place. But all I do know is that something weird, for nearly every field of expertise that might be involved in studying it, took place.

At any time in your life, has anything ever reproduced any part of the experience? Yes There was only one incident, that wasn't necessarily connected to the 'Archangel saga' as some people have called it. When I was 10, I went into renal failure. On the way to the hospital, I seemed to flicker between this world, the blue light, and another realm (which fit the stereotypical description of the cloud-filled Heaven). I was experiencing these cycles of pain, then as I would hit a threshold I would seemingly pass out and appear next to my great-grandfather, who died a year prior, as he was sitting with a bunch of other people I didn't recognize. Everyone there seemed confused about why I was able to appear next to them.

Is there anything else that you would like to add about your experience? No, that describes everything.

Are there any other questions that we could ask to help you communicate your experience? No, no other suggestions.