Experience Description

I had a problem pregnancy. I was in the hospital with premature labor and was hooked up to a drug to delay labor until the baby developed further. Unfortunately, I wound up being rushed into surgery for an emergency cesarean section. After surgery, I could feel I was fading. The anesthesiologist at one point put something under my nose to bring me back. I remember being wheeled into another room. My sister said she was in there and they tried to get her out of the room when they were losing me. She told them if I was going to die, I would die holding her hand. I was not conscious during that time; I don't remember anything until the experience.

I remember all my surroundings were purely white and very soft feeling in my mind. I was in such peace I just wanted to stand there; I was in no pain at all. The feeling of comfort is almost indescribable. Then, I looked and my mother, who had passed away about ten years earlier, was standing a distance away from me, like maybe 10 yards, but directly in front of me. She was also in white; her hair was as I remember it when she was a young woman from her pictures. She had a firm, mother firm, look on her face and she said 'Go back CJ, it's not time yet'. I remember the feeling of disappointment rushing over me: not wanting to go, but the next thing I knew I was awake with people around me talking. I remember how sad I felt.

The pain my body was in hit me hard. I was quite sick with a fever and infection. When I told them in the room that I had seen mom, they said it was because of my fever. I know better and no one can convince me otherwise. Since then I have had experiences of spirits living with me. After research I found out my awareness was enhanced because of the near-death experience.

Background Information:

Gender: Female

Date NDE Occurred: 'March 20, 1984'

NDE Elements:

At the time of your experience, was there an associated life-threatening event? Uncertain Childbirth 'Illness, trauma or other condition not considered life threatening'

How do you consider the content of your experience? Entirely pleasant

Did you feel separated from your body? No I lost awareness of my body

How did your highest level of consciousness and alertness during the experience compare to your normal everyday consciousness and alertness? Normal consciousness and alertness

At what time during the experience were you at your highest level of consciousness and alertness? Through the entire experience.

Were your thoughts speeded up? No

Did time seem to speed up or slow down? Everything seemed to be happening at once; or time stopped or lost all meaning

Were your senses more vivid than usual? Incredibly more vivid

Please compare your vision during the experience to your everyday vision that you had immediately prior to the time of the experience. I would say my vision was the same; it was the feelings I had with it that was so wonderful.

Please compare your hearing during the experience to your everyday hearing that you had immediately prior to the time of the experience. My hearing was just that same as normal.

Did you seem to be aware of things going on elsewhere? No

Did you pass into or through a tunnel? Uncertain

The experience included: Presence of deceased persons

Did you see any beings in your experience? No

Did you encounter or become aware of any deceased (or alive) beings? Yes My mom.

The experience included: Unearthly light

Did you see, or feel surrounded by, a brilliant light? A light clearly of mystical or other-worldly origin

Did you see an unearthly light? Uncertain It was such a pure and bright white, it could have been light I was seeing.

Did you seem to enter some other, unearthly world? Some unfamiliar and strange place It was what I would consider a place of peace, maybe heaven?

The experience included: Strong emotional tone

What emotions did you feel during the experience? Peace, contentment, free from pain, softness, happiness, comfort, joy.

Did you have a feeling of peace or pleasantness? Incredible peace or pleasantness

Did you have a feeling of joy? incredible joy

Did you feel a sense of harmony or unity with the universe? I felt no longer in conflict with nature

Did you suddenly seem to understand everything? No

Did scenes from your past come back to you? No

Did scenes from the future come to you? No

Did you come to a border or point of no return? I came to a barrier that I was not permitted to cross; or was sent back against my will

God, Spiritual and Religion:


What importance did you place on your religious/spiritual life prior to your experience? Greatly important to me

What was your religion prior to your experience? Christian- Other Christian

Have your religious practices changed since your experience? Yes In fact, before I thought everyone went to heaven and we never saw them again, but now I know they are around us, watching over us.

What importance do you place on your religious/spiritual life after your experience? Greatly important to me

What is your religion now? Christian- Other Christian

Did your experience include features consistent with your earthly beliefs? Content that was both consistent and not consistent with the beliefs you had at the time of your experience I believed people are out of pain when they die, that they feel peace.

Did you have a change in your values and beliefs because of your experience? Yes I know for a fact, ghosts are all around us; I also believe they visit us often. I believe in heaven.

Did you seem to encounter a mystical being or presence, or hear an unidentifiable voice? I encountered a definite being, or a voice clearly of mystical or unearthly origin It was my mom, no doubt about it.

Did you see deceased or religious spirits? No

Did you encounter or become aware of any beings who previously lived on earth who are described by name in religions (for example: Jesus, Muhammad, Buddha, etc.)? No

During your experience, did you gain information about premortal existence? No

During your experience, did you gain information about universal connection or oneness? No

Did you believe in the existence of God prior to your experience? God definitely exists

During your experience, did you gain information about the existence of God? No

Do you believe in the existence of God after your experience? God definitely exists

Concerning our Earthly lives other than Religion:


During your experience, did you gain special knowledge or information about your purpose? Uncertain In a way, since my mom said 'it's not time yet'. It made me aware my work on earth was not done. I still had more I was meant to do.

Did you believe that our earthly lives are meaningful and significant prior to your experience? Are possibly meaningful and significant

During your experience, did you gain information about the meaning of life? No

Did you believe in an afterlife prior to your experience? I was uncertain if an afterlife exists

Do you believe in an afterlife after your experience? An afterlife definitely exists Yes Yes, because my mom was there.

Did you fear death prior to your experience? I moderately feared death

Do you fear death after your experience? I do not fear death

Were you fearful living your life prior to your experience? Moderately fearful in living my earthly life

Were you fearful living your life after your experience? Moderately fearful in living my earthly life

Did you believe that our earthly lives are meaningful and significant prior to your experience? Are possibly meaningful and significant

Did you believe that our earthly lives are meaningful and significant after your experience? Are meaningful and significant

Did you gain information about how to live our lives? No

During your experience, did you gain information about life's difficulties, challenges and hardships? Yes Kind of, since my mom said "it's not time yet", it made me aware my work on earth was not done. I still had more I was meant to do.

Were you compassionate prior to your experience? Moderately compassionate toward others

During your experience, did you gain information about love? Yes I felt my mom's love. It was as if she had to use her "mom" voice to make me leave, that she wanted to be with me but knew I couldn't stay.

Were you compassionate after your experience? Greatly compassionate toward others

What life changes occurred in your life after your experience? Large changes in my life I started hearing, seeing and experiencing ghosts. I have been touched, had items moved, taken and even had my blanket pulled off me. Large changes in my life.

Have your relationships changed specifically because of your experience? Yes Yes I view people more by their souls than their bodily being.

After the NDE:


Was the experience difficult to express in words? No

How accurately do you remember the experience in comparison to other life events that occurred around the time of the experience? I remember the experience more accurately than other life events that occurred around the time of the experience The experience is etched in my mind as if it happened today. I'll never forget it, but some details about the operating room and afterwards is foggy.

Do you have any psychic, non-ordinary or other special gifts after your experience that you did not have before the experience? No

Are there one or several parts of your experience that are especially meaningful or significant to you? Seeing my mom and knowing she is okay. She is in the good spectrum of the spirit world.

Have you ever shared this experience with others? Yes I didn't talk about it until about 5 years later when I really started having experiences with ghosts. Then I talked to my sister and she assured me she has always had that sensitivity; it was at that time when we discussed what happened at the hospital. I have openly told many people about it. I think most people are curious when I tell them. When I share all my stories to go along with it, they seem to believe more that we are surrounded by spirits and anything is possible.

Did you have any knowledge of near death experience (NDE) prior to your experience? No

What did you believe about the reality of your experience shortly (days to weeks) after it happened? Experience was definitely real Because I 'felt' the experience. It was not like a dream that was hard to explain: it was real.

What do you believe about the reality of your experience now? Experience was definitely real My feelings have never changed or varied about my experience.

At any time in your life, has anything ever reproduced any part of the experience? No

Is there anything else that you would like to add about your experience? I just want to say, since that experience I have become more 'emotionally tuned- in' to myself, to others and life. Every leaf, flower, cloud: everything that surrounds us is more beautiful and appreciated.