Candace J NDE

Experience Description

First and foremost, I believe that my experience was a confirmation from God that I had purpose in my life. I have shared the details that I experienced with countless strangers as well as loved ones.

I underwent a lengthy spine surgery. While in recovery, the pain medication being administered caused me to stop breathing. I recall walking apprehensively through a dark tunnel toward a very bright light. I heard the faint sound of orchestrated music playing. As I was moving nearer to the end of the tunnel, I suddenly saw to the right a little boy motioning me to come to him. This little boy, I believed to be the child I had lost during a pregnancy many years before. I eagerly walked faster, attempting to get closer to him. I could see at the end of the tunnel with beautiful wildflowers swaying to the sound of the music. I wanted so desperately to touch him, but my feet became heavy and I could not move. Frustration overwhelmed me.

I woke suddenly with a nurse at my bedside administering a drug to resuscitate my breathing. I questioned why God sent me back to life. The experience caused anger, disappointment, resentment and most of all - a sense of my lack of purpose in life. The trauma has never dissipated. As the years have gone by, the most relevant thing I have taken from my NDE is that I'm still present and have purpose. It also gave me a glimpse of the afterlife. I have no fear of death because I know what awaits me beyond this life. As one person stated, 'God isn't done with you yet'. This NDE revelation has resonated with me through pancreatic cancer and a multitude of medical diagnoses. The ability to share my NDE with others is truly rewarding.

Background Information:

Gender: Female

Date NDE Occurred: 01/01/1994

NDE Elements:

At the time of your experience, was there an associated life-threatening event? Yes Surgery-related. Drug or medication overdose Clinical death (cessation of breathing or heart function) Following spine surgery in recovery/hospital, pain medication caused me to stop breathing due to incorrect dosage by pain management team.

How do you consider the content of your experience? Both pleasant AND distressing

Did you feel separated from your body? No No

How did your highest level of consciousness and alertness during the experience compare to your normal everyday consciousness and alertness? More consciousness and alertness than normal. The light, the music, and the difficulty walking was all above the norm.

At what time during the experience were you at your highest level of consciousness and alertness? In the later moments

Were your thoughts speeded up? No

Did time seem to speed up or slow down? No

Were your senses More vivid than usual? Incredibly more vivid

Please compare your vision during the experience to your everyday vision that you had immediately prior to the time of the experience. Vision was intensified.

Please compare your hearing during the experience to your everyday hearing that you had immediately prior to the time of the experience. Music is my love in life, so I usually have the volume louder than the music was in the experience.

Did you seem to be aware of things going on elsewhere? No

Did you pass into or through a tunnel? Yes into but not going to the end

Did you see any beings in your experience? I actually saw them

Did you encounter or become aware of any deceased (or alive) beings? No

Did you see, or feel surrounded by, a brilliant light? A light clearly of mystical or other-worldly origin

Did you see an unearthly light? Yes Brilliant light with the array of wildflowers

Did you seem to enter some other, unearthly world? A clearly mystical or unearthly realm

What emotions did you feel during the experience? Emotions felt were apprehension, joy, excitement, frustration, disappointment.

Did you have a feeling of peace or pleasantness? Relief or calmness

Did you have a feeling of joy? Incredible joy

Did you feel a sense of harmony or unity with the universe? No

Did you suddenly seem to understand everything? No

Did scenes from your past come back to you? No

Did scenes from the future come to you? No

Did you come to a border or point of no return? I came to a barrier that I was not permitted to cross; or was sent back against my will. I didn't make the decision to return, just couldn't move on through the tunnel.

God, Spiritual and Religion:

What was your religion prior to your experience? Christian- Protestant Actively involved in the Methodist Church

Have your religious practices changed since your experience? No

What is your religion now? Christian- Protestant Haven't been involved actively in church for over twenty-five years.

Did your experience include features consistent with your earthly beliefs? Content that was entirely consistent with the beliefs you had at the time of your experience. This was consistent with my belief of life after death.

Did you have a change in your values and beliefs because of your experience? No. My beliefs as a Christian that there is life beyond death were confirmed.

Did you seem to encounter a mystical being or presence, or hear an unidentifiable voice? No

Did you see deceased or religious spirits? I actually saw them

Did you encounter or become aware of any beings who previously lived on earth who are described by name in religions (for example: Jesus, Muhammad, Buddha, etc.)? No

During your experience, did you gain information about premortal existence? Yes My deceased child was there and welcoming me to join him.

During your experience, did you gain information about universal connection or oneness? No

Concerning our Earthly lives other than Religion:

During your experience, did you gain special knowledge or information about your purpose? No

During your experience, did you gain information about the meaning of life? No

During your experience, did you gain information about an afterlife? Yes I saw in the tunnel a child that I had lost.

Did you gain information about how to live our lives? No

During your experience, did you gain information about life's difficulties, challenges and hardships? No

During your experience, did you gain information about love? Yes I experienced the felling of love because I was able to see my deceased child.

What life changes occurred in your life after your experience? Slight changes in my life I have found purpose and am not fearful of death.

Have your relationships changed specifically because of your experience? My relationships have been enriched. Yes

After the NDE:

Was the experience difficult to express in words? No

How accurately do you remember the experience in comparison to other life events that occurred around the time of the experience? I remember the experience more accurately than other life events that occurred around the time of the experience. My recall of the experience is always consistent.

Do you have any psychic, non-ordinary or other special gifts after your experience that you did not have before the experience? No

Are there one or several parts of your experience that are especially meaningful or significant to you? Seeing my unborn child was a boy, gave me peace. Knowing that he is waiting for me is consoling. Having this experience of seeing my little boy resonated in my thoughts two years ago as I lost my 35 yr. old Son. As he was taken off of life support, I held his hand, told him not to be afraid and let go to be with God. Most difficult thing I've ever experienced but a certain sense of peace that I knew I had to share with him. Just two minutes went by and he passed.

Have you ever shared this experience with others? Yes Numerous times over 30years. Responses are deeply touching, and I have never regretted sharing.

Did you have any knowledge of near death experience (NDE) prior to your experience? Yes Media. No

What did you believe about the reality of your experience shortly (days to weeks) after it happened? Experience was definitely real. Never once doubted the reality of the experience.

What do you believe about the reality of your experience now? Experience was definitely real. Served purpose for me as well as many others I've shared it with.

At any time in your life, has anything ever reproduced any part of the experience? Yes The loss of my mother, my oldest son.

Is there anything else that you would like to add about your experience? No

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