Sukie M's Possible NDE

EXPERIENCE DESCRIPTION:

          I was in the hospital lying on a table in a surgical room waiting for a procedure to have my bladder examined having suffered numerous urinary tract infections over the past two years.  I was dressed only in a gown and had my legs in stirrups, which was unbelievable traumatic for a little girl.  A nurse had just chased an orderly out of the room who had no business being there and was clearly staring at me before he was removed from the room.  I felt violated and helpless.  Then the urologist came in with the anesthesiologist and I knew I was going to be "gassed" and put to sleep.  Suddenly, it was just more than I could bear and I panicked in a way I could not believe possible - it was just so intense and I struggled to fight my way off the table. The next thing I knew, I was being pulled through a white tunnel with bells clanging all around me.  I remember thinking I had never heard such a sound before and wondered if this was what it was like to be put to sleep.  Suddenly, a being appeared before me - a kind young man about in his  teens.  He was dressed like a wizard.  I believe it was my deceased brother who would have been six years older than me if he had lived.  I never knew him as I was born 10 months after he died.  I felt instantly at ease with him and felt love and peace radiating from his presence. He said "come on, I am taking you with me for a while as you are very afraid."  He took my hand and the next thing I knew we were in outer space staring at the earth as it revolved.  I remember seeing a cord coming from my body and reaching all the way to the earth.  He remarked how beautiful the earth was and asked me if I felt better and then suddenly he said, "you must go back now" and I awoke vomiting into a pan.  What is remarkable about this is that I saw the earth long before we had space travel and I never saw the earth that way again until the first shots were broadcast on television when the moon walk occurred.

Was the kind of experience difficult to express in words?          Yes    No one I knew had ever had an experience like mine or had discussed it. So, I didn't have any context into which to put what I saw and heard. I didn't know or understand what happened except that it was exactly what I needed at the time it was happening.

At the time of this experience, was there an associated life threatening event?          Uncertain     I was under anesthesia so I can't be sure if I was having a reaction.

At what time during the experience were you at your highest level of consciousness and alertness?  While I was in outer space holding hands with the spiritual being.

How did your highest level of consciousness and alertness during the experience compare to your normal every day consciousness and alertness?          Normal consciousness and alertness         

Did your vision differ in any way from your normal, everyday vision (in any aspect, such as clarity, field of vision, colors, brightness, depth perception degree of solidness/transparency of objects, etc.)?          Yes    I could see the atmosphere around the earth and watched the clouds swirling aroung the seas and continents.  I could see the cord attaching me to earth extend all the way back to the planet.

Did your hearing differ in any way from your normal, everyday hearing (in any aspect, such as clarity, ability to recognize source of sound, pitch, loudness, etc.)?
          Yes    Yes - I will never forget the intense clanging of the bells.

Did you experience a separation of your consciousness from your body?          Yes

What emotions did you feel during the experience?          Calm, wonderment, love, peace.

Did you pass into or through a tunnel or enclosure?        Yes    It was a white and filmy tunnel and I felt slightly claustrophobic for an instant.

Did you see a light?         Uncertain     I didn't see a light but I felt like I passed into lightness.  It is so hard to describe and I was only 10.

Did you meet or see any other beings?         Yes    See above narrative.

Did you experience a review of past events in your life?   No     

Did you observe or hear anything regarding people or events during your experience that could be verified later?         No     

Did you see or visit any beautiful or otherwise distinctive locations, levels or dimensions?        Yes   

Did you have any sense of altered space or time?  Yes   

Did you have a sense of knowing special knowledge, universal order and/or purpose?     Yes    That there is so much more than we know beyond our physical limitations.

Did you reach a boundary or limiting physical structure? Uncertain    

Did you become aware of future events?      No         

Did you have any psychic, paranormal or other special gifts following the experience you did not have prior to the experience?       No     

Have you shared this experience with others?        Yes    I told my mother on the way home from the hospital.  She replied that I had a dream.  Years later, she confessed she believed me at the time but didn't want to confuse me.  Mother had had her own NDE when she was pregnant with me and undergoing anethesia for a dental experience.  She said she flew out of her body into a corner of the room and watched the dentist panic for an instance.  My husband refuses to believe me and thinks I shouldn't talk about this for fear people will think I am "nuts."  Deep down, I think he really does believe me but my experience is at odds with his belief that there is nothing after death.  I really don't talk about this and I hesitated for a long time before deciding to share my experience on-line.

Did you have any knowledge of near death experience (NDE) prior to your experience? No     

How did you view the reality of your experience shortly (days to weeks) after it happened:   Experience was definitely real   It was so long ago, I can't really remember.  I think I was just so confused I didn't want to think about it for a while.

Were there one or several parts of the experience especially meaningful or significant to you? I have always felt that my deceased brother has been watching over me my entire life.  The being I was with just felt like the comforting presence I have always sensed around me.

How do you currently view the reality of your experience:          Experience was definitely real         In the 1970s, I first came across literature describing NDE and when I read about tunnels and bells, I can not begin to express how excited I got.  It just confirmed my experience in a way I can not describe.  To read narratives from strangers articulating what I felt and saw prior to being in space was very validating.

Have your relationships changed specifically as a result of your experience?          Yes    I know there is so much more to "being" than just what we know of on earth in our physical bodies.  I try to live my life in a more meaningful way and desire to make a positive difference before I die.

Have your religious beliefs/practices changed specifically as a result of your experience? Yes    Unwavering faith in life after death.

Following the experience, have you had any other events in your life, medications or substances which reproduced any part of the experience?    No                   

Did the questions asked and information you provided so far accurately and comprehensively describe your experience? Yes    I just want to add that I was with my mother at the time of her death. She had been suffering from Alzheimer's for years and was severely demented at the end. She was in a fetal position, eyes fixed and unblinking, and totally unresponsive. My father had just died 6 days before her.  At the instant of her death, she sat up in bed unassisted, her eyes flew open, her personality was back, and she gasped with the most beautiful look of joy and ecstacy on her face.  I believe she saw my father and brother waiting for her.