RoseMarie W's NDE

I was in bed at night.  The property across the road from my home was being burned to get rid of the underbrush.  The smoke seeped into my home and cause me to have more difficulty with my breathing.  After going to sleep, I was wide awake.  I knew that I was not breathing.  I tried to take in some air but it felt as if a large block of cement was on my chest.  I was not afraid and I understood what was happening.  I knew that I was leaving my body.  I never saw a tunnel but I was going backwards from what I perceived to be a place of division.  One the other side, I was alive and on this side I was not breathing.  I was moving slowly at first and started gaining speed away from the place of division.  It was almost like a surface when you're under water.  It's hard to describe exactly what it was like.  I was totally aware of what was happening and there was absolutely no fear.  My mind and thoughts were moving as fast as lightening.  Everything was like crystal.  I understood everything and again there was absolutely no fear.  I was aware that I was not breathing and I tried to take in some air. I was able to get in a little air and the backward movement slowed down.  Then I just made the decision that it was too hard and I stopped breathing again.  The backward movement from that surface really started to speed up.  I knew that I wouldn't be able to make it back so I started breathing with great effort and I the backward motion slowed down.  That's all I remember.  When I awoke the next day, I was trembling.  I called my doctor who wanted to put me in the hospital and I refused to go.  I was tired of hospitals. This was on a Friday morning.  After going back and forth with the doctor's office over the weekend, I finally went in the hospital Monday.  They wanted to put me back on the respirator which I refused.  They did put me in recovery instead of ICU because I could be watched more closely there.  They told me on Monday that I was trying to die on them.  I told them that they should have been at my house  last Thursday night/Friday morning.

Was the kind of experience difficult to express in words? Yes     There are no words to describe what I experienced.

At the time of this experience, was there an associated life threatening event?          Yes     Because of the myasthenia gravis my blood oxygen level was always low.  I had great difficulty breathing.  At this time, I quit breathing all together.

At what time during the experience were you at your highest level of consciousness and alertness?    When I was moving backward away from the surface.

How did your highest level of consciousness and alertness during the experience compare to your normal every day consciousness and alertness?    More consciousness and alertness than normal

If your highest level of consciousness and alertness during the experience was different from your normal every day consciousness and alertness, please explain:            When I was moving backward away from the surface.

Did your vision differ in any way from your normal, everyday vision (in any aspect, such as clarity, field of vision, colors, brightness, depth perception degree of solidness/transparency of objects, etc.)?  Uncertain      I don't remember different colors.  I really can't what color everything was or the other things you're asking.  I do know that it was very, very clear.  There are no words to describe what it was like.

Did your hearing differ in any way from your normal, everyday hearing (in any aspect, such as clarity, ability to recognize source of sound, pitch, loudness, etc.)?
            Uncertain      I don't remember any sounds.  I didn't or couldn't speak.  I could think very quickly.

Did you experience a separation of your consciousness from your body?     Uncertain

What emotions did you feel during the experience?            Not fear.  Peace.  Contentment.  Everything was okay.

Did you pass into or through a tunnel or enclosure?          Uncertain      It wasn't a tunnel.  There was a place that I can only describe as a 'surface' that on one side of that place, you were in your body and alive and on this other side, you were leaving your body and not breathing.  I was going backward as if I was going away from that place of separation.  It was like you're in water and you're going deeper away from the surface but doing it backwards.

Did you see a light?           No      

Did you meet or see any other beings?           No      

Did you experience a review of past events in your life?    No      

Did you observe or hear anything regarding people or events during your experience that could be verified later?          No      

Did you see or visit any beautiful or otherwise distinctive locations, levels or dimensions?           No           

Did you have any sense of altered space or time?   Yes     There was no time.

Did you have a sense of knowing special knowledge, universal order and/or purpose?     Uncertain            There is no fear in death.  I didn't see anyone or anything.  No one told me anything neither was any special knowledge imparted to me other than there is no fear in death.

Did you reach a boundary or limiting physical structure? No      

Did you become aware of future events?       No           

Did you have any psychic, paranormal or other special gifts following the experience you did not have prior to the experience?     No      

Have you shared this experience with others?         Yes    

Did you have any knowledge of near death experience (NDE) prior to your experience?    No      

How did you view the reality of your experience shortly (days to weeks) after it happened:            Experience was definitely real    I know what happened because I lived it.

Were there one or several parts of the experience especially meaningful or significant to you?            The whole experience was very significant to me.  There was no particular part.

How do you currently view the reality of your experience:            Experience was definitely real    I don't understand exactly what you are asking.  Now, after many years, the experience is still very real to me.  Today, I don't know whether my brain was shutting down from lack of oxygen that caused this experience.  Sometimes I wonder exactly what did happen that night. I wonder if it was some type of chemical reaction in my body at the point of death. I know it did happen.  There is no doubt about that.  I did, at the time when all this was happening to me, have seizures from cerebral hypoxia many times.  Sometimes 1 or 2 times a day. So I knew what it was like to go into convulsions from lack of oxygen. When this happened there was no seizure just this experience.  I no longer have Myasthenia Gravis.

Have your relationships changed specifically as a result of your experience?           No      

Have your religious beliefs/practices changed specifically as a result of your experience?            No           

Following the experience, have you had any other events in your life, medications or substances which reproduced any part of the experience?         No       It never happened again.           

Did the questions asked and information you provided so far accurately and comprehensively describe your experience?         Yes