Mary Lu R's NDE

Experience description: 

      I REMEMBER GOING THROUGH A DARKNESS. I HAVE TROUBLE GOING INTO DARK PLACES, EVEN IN A STORM I HAVE TROUBLE GOING INTO OUR BASEMENT. THIS DARKNESS WASN'T THREATENING OR FRIGHTENING, IT ACTUALLY FELT COMFORTABLE AND SAFE. THEN I WENT INTO THE "LIGHT", I PUT EMPHASIS ON THIS BECAUSE I HAVEN'T WORDS TO EXPRESS HOW THIS LIGHT MADE ME FEEL. THERE SEEMED TO BE SERENITY, PEACE, HAPPINESS, EVERYTHING RIGHT WITH THE WORLD. I'VE TOLD OTHERS MULTIPLY YOUR MOST HAPPIEST FEELINGS, YOUR MOST CONTENTED FEELINGS TIMES A HUNDRED MILLION; AND THE FEELINGS I HAD DOESN'T EVEN COME CLOSE. MY GRANDMOTHER (ON MY MOTHER'S SIDE_) MET ME AND TOLD ME THAT GOD WASN'T THROUGH WITH ME YET. HE STILL HAD SOMETHING LEFT FOR ME TO DO AND THAT I HAD TO GO BACK. I FEEL I REALLY DIDN'T REALLY WANT TO; BUT GOD (OR WHOEVER THE SUPREME BEING IS) IS MOST POWERFUL.

Any associated medications or substances with the potential to affect the experience:  No

Was the experience difficult to express in words?  Yes

      What was it about the experience that makes it hard to communicate?  AT FIRST, IT WAS HARD TO TALK TO ANYONE ABOUT THE EXPERIENCE, UNTIL I WAS ABLE TO RATIONALIZE IT WITHIN MY OWN FRAMEWORK. I TOOK A DEATH & DYING CLASS IN COLLEGE AND WAS ABLE THEN TO TALK ABOUT MY EXPERIENCE. IT TOOK ME ABOUT 5 YEARS BEFORE I WOULD TALK ABOUT IT TO ANYONE OTHER THAN MY FAMILY AND CLOSEST FRIENDS. NOW I WILL TALK IF THE TOPIC IS BROUGHT UP, I DON'T BRING IT UP.

At the time of the experience, was there an associated life threatening event?  Yes

      Describe:  I WAS INVOLVED IN A CAR ACCIDENT AND HAD TO BE RESUSCITATED FIVE TIMES  AT WESLEY HOSPITAL, WICHITA, KANSAS. MY GRANDMOTHER, WHO HAD DIED, SENT MY BACK, TELLING ME GOD STILL HAD SOMETHING LEFT FOR ME TO DO.

What was your level of consciousness and alertness during the experience?  I WAS CLINICALLY DEAD

Was the experience dream like in any way?  YES

Did you experience a separation of consciousness from your body?  No

What emotions did you feel during the experience?  PEACE, LOVE, HOPE, CONTENTMENT, SERENITY, BEING NOT AFRAID, BEING SAFE

Did you hear any unusual sounds or noises?  JUST MY GRANDMOTHER'S VOICE

Did you pass into or through a tunnel or enclosure?  Yes

      Describe:  DARKNESS, BUT A SAFE DARKNESS, INTO A BRILLIANT AND WONDERFUL LIGHT

Did you see a light?  Yes

      Describe:  A LIGHT THAT MADE ME FEEL SAFE AND EVERYTHING GOOD.

Did you meet or see any other beings?  Yes

      Describe:  MY GRANDMOTHER MET ME IN THE LIGHT. SHE TOLD ME THAT GOD WASN'T FINISHED WITH ME  AND THAT I HAD TO GO BACK.

Did you experience a review of past events in your life?  No

Did you observe or hear anything regarding people or events during your experience that could be verified later?  No

Did you see or visit any beautiful or otherwise distinctive locations, levels or dimensions?  No

Did you have any sense of altered space or time?  No

Did you have a sense of knowing special knowledge, universal order and/or purpose?  Yes

      Describe:  I HAVE A FEELING OF BEING PRIVILEGED TO KNOW THERE IS A HOME AFTER DEATH AND THAT I WILL BE GOING THERE EVENTUALLY.

Did you reach a boundary or limiting physical structure?  No

Did you become aware of future events?  No

Were you involved in or aware of a decision to return to the body?  Yes

      Describe:  MY GRANDMOTHER TOLD ME I HAD TO RETURN BECAUSE GOD STILL HAD SOMETHING LEFT FOR ME TO DO FOR HIM.

Did you have any psychic, paranormal or other special gifts following the experience you did not have prior to the experience?  Yes

      Describe:  I SEEM TO HAVE ACQUIRED A WAY OF READING PEOPLE. NOT FROM ANYTHING ANYONE SAYS, JUST FROM THEIR DEMEANOR. I FEEL I AM MORE SENSITIVE TO PEOPLE THAN I EVER WAS BEFORE THIS EXPERIENCE.

Did you have any changes of attitudes or beliefs following the experience?  Yes

      Describe:  I NO LONGER ATTEND AN ORGANIZED CHURCH, I HAVE NO TOLERANCE FOR PEOPLE WHO WANT TO TELL ME HOW TO BELIEVE IN MY GOD. I ALSO HAVE LET A LOT OF ANGER GO. I DON'T FLARE LIKE I USE TO, I SEEM TO CHOOSE THINGS TO GET ANGRY ABOUT A LITTLE BETTER THAN BEFORE. MOST THINGS, THAT WOULD HAVE MADE ME ANGRY BEFORE, ARE NOT THAT IMPORTANT. I JUST CHOOSE MORE CAREFULLY.

Has the experience affected your relationships?  Daily life?  Religious practices etc.?  Career choices?  AS I SAID BEFORE, I DON'T ATTEND ORGANIZED SERVICES; I'M MORE TOLERANT THAN BEFORE; I THANK GOD EVERYDAY FOR SPARING ME FROM PARALYSIS AND GIVING ME ANOTHER DAY TO LIVE AND LOVE. IT TRULY LET ME MAKE PEACE WITH MYSELF AND ACCEPT MYSELF.

Have you shared this experience with others?  Yes

      Describe:  AT FIRST, I COULD ONLY TALK ABOUT IT TO FAMILY MEMBERS, GRADUALLY LETTING CLOSE FRIENDS KNOW. NOW I CAN TALK ABOUT IT AT THE DROP OF A HAT. IF THE TOPIC IS BROUGHT UP, I WILL RELATE MY OWN EXPERIENCE. I HAVE A FRIEND WHO CLAIMS TO BE AN ATHEIST, AND I KNOW MY STORY HAS BROUGHT DOUBT INTO HIS BELIEF. WE OCCASIONALLY TALK ABOUT DEATH. I ALSO AM NOT AFRAID OF DEATH ANY MORE.

What emotions did you experience following your experience?  I JUST HAVE THE FEELINGS FROM BEING IN THE DARK AND LIGHT.

What was the best and worst part of your experience?  THE BEST PART WAS BEING ALLOWED TO SEE WHAT AFTERLIFE IS LIKE; I REALLY CAN'T COME UP WITH A WORST PART. IT TRULY WAS A LIFE CHANGING SITUATION FOR ME.

Is there anything else you would like to add concerning the experience?  NO

Has your life changed specifically as a result of your experience?  Yes

Following the experience, have you had any other events in your life, medications or substances which reproduced any part of the experience?  No

Did the questions asked and information you provided accurately and comprehensively describe your experience?  No response

      Explain:  PRETTY MUCH