Mary's NDE

Edited for clarity by Ron

Experience description: 

   The following is a NDE obtained over several months from a lady who had never shared this before, except with her son.  The major and minor details of this story remained consistent over the months it was shared.  It was very difficult for her to share this.  Approximately one of every four NDE experiences are this detailed.  Among the NDE experiences which have this level of detail, the events are quite typical. 

"THE OTHER SIDE"
A Near Death Experience

When I was a young, single woman living in my hometown of London, England, I was admitted to Memorial Hospital with severe complications following a failed attempted abortion which I had done in my apartment bathroom. Being raised Catholic, I sought to handle the unwanted pregnancy secretly and alone. After losing a great deal of blood and feeling very cold, I called for an ambulance to take me to the hospital.

As soon as I was rushed into the emergency room, I recalled all the staff running into my room bringing carts with equipment, bottles, pumps, needles, bandages, tubes, etc. From the navel down I was drenched with blood and very weak. I was in a life threatening, very critical condition. As the blood drained from my body so did my will to live.

I heard a "pop" sound and suddenly the pain stopped. I felt calm for the first time in 3 months since learning of my pregnancy by a man who had lied to me telling me he loved me and wanted to marry me but who had a wife and 5 children in another city. I had a very clear view of my body as they ferociously worked on me, hooking up a transfusion and other tubes. I recalled thinking that I just wished they would stop. I looked horrible and my color was very bad. I was embarrassed to be the cause of all the panic. I had sinned and didn’t deserve to live. The fact that I was having these thoughts from within inches of the ceiling didn’t bother me or confuse me as much as sensing the stress I was causing among those below me. I also know I was totally conscious even though I had heard a nurse, the only one in a blue smock, tell the doctors I had lost consciousness soon after entering the emergency room. I was very aware of every detail of the events and the room.

I was aware of a tunnel which appeared suddenly, and I was being pulled into it. I was happy to be away from that tense scene below. I floated toward the tunnel and passed right through a ceiling fan and then the ceiling. The blackness of the tunnel was churning and I began to gather speed. I was curious about my present body or form and looked at my arms and hands. They seemed to be expanding and emitting a slight glow. I felt a rush of air and a low droning noise like a vibration as I gained speed heading for a bright light far in the distance. As I proceeded at a faster rate, I felt there was a presence with me that kept me calm and emitted both love and wisdom. I didn’t see anyone, but I felt the essence of my grandpa who had died when I was 13. I was aware of his comforting presence but saw or heard nothing.

I finally came to the end and floated into a place which was overwhelmed by a radiant white light that seemed to embody all the concepts of love. A love which was unconditional and like a mother has for a child. It was definitely a warm joyful presence, the same one that drew me into the tunnel in the first place. It seemed like a giant force field or energy that radiated all the good and noble emotions known to man. I had given up the ways of the Catholic Church as soon as I left parochial school at 17, feeling that I had been released from an unyielding prison and was far from religious, but I knew in my heart that this was God. Words can’t describe my awe in this presence. It seemed like I became part of The Light and then the Light became part of me. We were one. I suddenly understood, without question, how interconnected we all are with each other, God and all life forms in the Universe.

At that time, I recall wondering if I would be punished for murdering my child and in doing so, kill myself as well. I could tell He knew my every thought and feeling. The next thing I knew I was seeing a sleeping baby I knew to be me. I watched with fascination as I saw the highlights of each stage of my life. It was like seeing a circular movie screen and many different scenes flashing by at tremendous speeds. Somehow I was able to see and grasp not only what was happening, but the feelings I was experiencing at the time as well as the emotions I caused in others. I watched and felt my mother’s shame as she bore me out of wedlock right up to the elation of love and the crushing pain of rejection and betrayal. I understood the fear and insecurities of the man that caused my pain and his own guilt upon breaking up with me upon learning of my pregnancy. I felt every good or bad deed I had ever done and it’s consequences upon others. It was a difficult time for me, but I was supported by unconditional love and weathered the painful parts.

I was asked telepathically about whether I wanted to stay or return to my former life in the "Earth School". I fell to my knees in order to show my desire to stay with Him. He showed me a beautiful shiny bubble which floated next to me. In it I saw a tiny baby nursing at a breast. The baby became a toddler and began walking toward me still inside the bubble. Then the image of a young boy turned into a teenager and he continued to age until he was a full grown man. Who is that? I asked. Your son Michael, was the reply. I recall feeling very relieved that I hadn’t destroyed his chance at life. A flood of fearful thoughts crowded into my mind. I wasn’t even married and could barely support myself, how could I raise a son? Could he ever forget or forgive me for trying to abort him at four months into life? How could I ever do this alone without help? I saw a flash of myself with a man I knew to be my future husband and he was holding the 2 year old boy I saw in the picture. For the first time, I allowed myself to feel love for the baby I was carrying. All the embarrassment, complications and hardships I had used to rationalize my abortion seemed very weak and selfish.

Suddenly, I was popped back into my body and searing pain tore through my lower body. The same nurse in the blue smock was giving me a shot and telling me to relax that the pain medication would soon begin to take affect. It seemed as if I had not been unconscious for more than a few minutes yet my visit to the "Other Side" seemed to last hours.

While out of my body in the E. R. I noticed a red label on the side of the blade of a ceiling fan facing the top of the ceiling. When I was taken to the recovery room, I was told that my baby was saved. I said, " yes, I know". I asked if someone would please listen to my incredible experience and was told that they had no time. My doctors said it was a miracle that he was able to save the baby along with myself. He said he thought he’d lost us on two occasions. I tried to tell him about my experience but he was called away. His parting smile, left no doubt that he felt he was wasting his time listening to the drug induced ramblings of a crazy woman. My mother arrived later, with "religious" reinforcements trying to get a confession of sins. I was mildly amused when a Nun appeared and began to pray for me, asking God to forgive me. I knew I was already forgiven. My punishment came from my own emotions of guilt and shame that I experienced so painfully during the bubble movie review of my former life. Only one nurse in the hospital listened to me. She did so after I told her a few details of what she had said to the doctors and nurses while I was unconscious. She told of hearing of others who had been brought back from the brink of death, with similar tales. I finally convinced her to get a tall ladder and see for herself the red sticker whose appearance I described in great detail on the hidden side of the emergency room ceiling fan. The nurse and an orderly saw the sticker, confirming all the details of its appearance I described. I knew what I knew, but I felt better that at least two people believed me. I never mentioned this experience again until now.

I went ahead with my life optimistically, with a whole new attitude and delivered a healthy baby boy 5 months later, and I named him Michael. The damages I had done to myself prevented further pregnancies but the psychic and love bond I experienced with Michael is truly a cherished "gift" from Beyond.

The experience remains as real and vivid now as it did 34 years ago and changed my life in many spiritually uplifting ways.

NDERF addendum: Mary returned to the Catholic church, but was careful to attend a church that was more open minded than her previous church.  NDERF expresses appreciation to Mary for her courage to share.