Laura R's NDE

Experience description: 

I was playing in the water near the shore with my brother when I stepped into a big hole and went under.  I struggled to get to the surface, and began to panic as I ran out of air.  I remember struggling to breathe, and then the panic left me and I felt as if I were breathing, yet I was still under water.

I saw my tiny form curled up in a fetal position receding away from me, down into the dark green water.  I felt euphoria as I started toward the surface and toward the bright light which shimmered just above the water.  I struggled to reach the surface and the light, but before I could break the surface, I woke up on the beach and there were a bunch of people around pumping water out of me.  That's all I remember.

Was the kind of experience difficult to express in words? No      

At the time of this experience, was there an associated life threatening event?          Yes     I was a small child playing at the beach and I got into deep water over my head.

At what time during the experience were you at your highest level of consciousness and alertness?    After I separated from my body and turned toward the light at the surface of the water I felt a great sense of euphoria and peace.

How did your highest level of consciousness and alertness during the experience compare to your normal every day consciousness and alertness?    More consciousness and alertness than normal

If your highest level of consciousness and alertness during the experience was different from your normal every day consciousness and alertness, please explain:            In normal every day consciousness, there is fear and pain and doubt.  In a spiritual state separated from the body, there is no fear and pain and doubt.

There is only a sense of perfect peace and comfort.

Did your vision differ in any way from your normal, everyday vision (in any aspect, such as clarity, field of vision, colors, brightness, depth perception degree of solidness/transparency of objects, etc.)?  Yes     My vision as a spirit was clear.  My normal vision underwater would be clouded, eyes burning from salt water.

Did your hearing differ in any way from your normal, everyday hearing (in any aspect, such as clarity, ability to recognize source of sound, pitch, loudness, etc.)?
            Uncertain      I don't remember any sound.

Did you experience a separation of your consciousness from your body?     Yes

What emotions did you feel during the experience?            First panic as I suffocated, then perfect peace and euphoria, and even a sense of breathing and taking in oxygen.

Did you pass into or through a tunnel or enclosure?          No      

Did you see a light?           Yes     The light was incredibly bright, but just above the surface of the water.  I struggled toward it, like a moth to a flame, but before I broke the surface I woke up on the beach.

Did you have any sense of altered space or time?   Yes     Moving toward the light at the surface seemed to take a long time, or happen in slow motion.

Did you have a sense of knowing special knowledge, universal order and/or purpose?     No      

Did you reach a boundary or limiting physical structure? Yes     The surface of the water was a boundary that I did not cross.  I wanted to go to the light, but I didn't make it.

Have you shared this experience with others?         Yes     I've only shared this experience with a few people.  I don't think people understand.  Only someone who has had a similar experience might understand.

How did you view the reality of your experience shortly (days to weeks) after it happened:            Experience was probably real    Since I was a small child and this was a traumatic event, I forgot it for a long time.  Then it came back to me and I remembered it when I was older.  I think I could process the event better at an older age.

Were there one or several parts of the experience especially meaningful or significant to you?            The feeling of suffocating was especially scary, but then the feeling of breathing was incredibly euphoric.  It was amazing.

How do you currently view the reality of your experience:            Experience was definitely real            This event has been out of my mind for a long time, however, recently it came to mind and I can't think of anything else.  I want to know what is on the other side.  I want to break through the surface and come into the light.  I am tired of walking the earth in darkness.  I want to Go, and Know.

Have your relationships changed specifically as a result of your experience?           No       I wish, but I have a very angry, unhappy daughter who lives with me.  When I try to talk to her about spiritual matters, she gets violent and angry.  I believe she has a brain chemical imbalance, but she refuses to get help.  I am tired of fighting with her.  I want to live with God.

Have your religious beliefs/practices changed specifically as a result of your experience?            Yes            I have no interest in organized religion, yet I have an all-consuming interest in knowing the mind of God.  I study quantum physics, and I paint and write.  I long for death, and for liberation from my flesh.

Following the experience, have you had any other events in your life, medications or substances which reproduced any part of the experience?         No       The experience can not be reproduced with any chemical or artificial substance.

Is there anything else you would like to add concerning the experience?          None, except that I remember it daily, and long for separation from the flesh.  I want to find that peaceful, beatific state.

Did the questions asked and information you provided so far accurately and comprehensively describe your experience?         Yes