Jeana B's NDE

Experience description: 

      I was involved in a terrible accident that until this day people look at me and still ask how and why I survived.  I was accidently shot in the head at point blank range with a 9 mm gun.  I live to tell about it and look and feel just as great before the accident.  There is so much to explain what happened that I don't know where to begin but I will try my best to explain to you the experience I had. 

It was Sat. January 14, 1995.  I had just sat down on my couch to relax a little before heading out to pick out my new dryer that was to be a gift from my friends family.  My friend had a gun that laid out on the table and to both of our knowledge the gun was not loaded.  As I saw the gun I though to myself he had better put it away in its carrying case before my brother came over and sees it laying out in the open.  I took the gun and placed it behind my head on the couch so when my friend came down I could just let him know that he needed to put it away.  I remember talking while I was facing the TV waiting for him to respond.  The next thing I knew I felt paralyzed.  I felt a tremendous ring go through my head and it was as if the world stood still.  My eyes were open and in my mind I was still alert but later to find out I was lifeless.

I knew almost instantly  that I had been shot and at the same time kept thinking is this what it like to die.  My eyes stayed open as I lay there motionless.  I tried so hard to let my friend know that I was still here. I tried with all my strength to lift my arms to reach out to him and let him know I wasn't dead, so I thought.  That I could see him.  I felt as if I had a hundred pounds worth of bricks holding my arms down but I fought with all my strength to reach out too him.  I then saw myself lift up form the couch with my arms stretched out in front of me to grab for him and let him know I was still here.  Everything was like slow motion.  But at the same moment all went black. I remember feeling somber and so at peace with myself.  I felt so, I almost can't explain it but I feel it now as I write this.  I never saw the light but I felt my body floating up and I didn't know where I was. 

The next thing I knew my sight came back again and I saw my friend on the phone calling 911 and telling the person on the line that I was female and had been shot in the head.  He looked so lost and afraid.  I wanted to reach out to him so bad and tell him I was alright and never felt any pain and was at peace, but I could not. Again I had thought is this what its like to die.  I thought I was going to see myself at my own funeral and actually be buried while I was in this state.  Once again, I slipped into the darkness and felt so at peace with the darkness around me and actually saw the image of a hand through the darkness come at me and my soul turned around and I felt this hand push me away from behind.  I truly believe this was my guardian angel.  As I was turned away I found that I was falling back at the speed of light.  I had re-entered my body and felt as if I was reborn again.  My body was taking its first breath and I woke up in a state of shock gasping for air and kicking the paramedics around me.  I felt as if my soul had given my body life once again. 

It is hard for to write out exactly what happened to me during this period of unconsciousness but I can tell you that I experienced something that until this day was a miracle because Im alive an well to talk about it.  I had been in a coma state for a week after I first awoke in my home and suffered a mild stroke.  I found out later that the bullet went in my right ear and came out the lower left side of my neck and re-entered through my left shoulder and exited out from under my left arm.  Doctors can not explain how I survived this ordeal  I had gone through surgery to repair my blood vessel in my neck and had a tracheotomy tube put in.  The doctors said I may never talk because my vocal cord had been damaged, eat normally, ( stomach tube, hear through my right ear or have full use of my right arm and face.  I had also been told that because my neck was injured and two disks had fused together while healing that I may never fully turn my head again which would leave me incapable to drive.  I proved the medical industry wrong.  It was a miracle that I survived at all but its a miracle to doctors, friends, and family that Im here today just as I was before the accident.  It took a lot of hard work and rehab to become the person I am today.  I feel as if I had this second chance because it was not my time and I was reborn again.  There is so more I would to share with you.  My personal experience with the hospital and how much it took to achieve where I am today.  I can only hope that my story in some way will help in your research or help another with a similar story in some way.

Any associated medications or substances with the potential to affect the experience:  No

Was the experience difficult to express in words?  No

At the time of the experience, was there an associated life threatening event?  No

What was your level of consciousness and alertness during the experience?  I felt as if I was in and out of consciousness and felt alert but I was told I stopped breathing and my lips were blue by the time the paramedics came.

Was the experience dream like in any way?  No, didn't feel like I dream.  I felt as if this was the way it was suppose to be and I was excepting of what might happen.  It was so peaceful.  I felt as if I had nothing to worry about.

Did you experience a separation of consciousness from your body?  Yes

Describe your appearance or form apart from your body:  When I tried to reach out to my friend.  He told me I never moved once.  When I was afloat also, I knew I was gone from my body.

What emotions did you feel during the experience?  Very overwhelming feelings of my surroundings and with myself.

Did you hear any unusual sounds or noises?  no

Did you pass into or through a tunnel or enclosure?  Yes

      Describe:  I was somewhere else floating upwards but couldn't make out where I was.

Did you see a light?  No

Did you meet or see any other beings?  Uncertain

      Describe:  I did feel the presence of another but never saw them directly.  Just a hand coming toward me.

Did you experience a review of past events in your life?  No

Did you observe or hear anything regarding people or events during your experience that could be verified later?  No response

Did you see or visit any beautiful or otherwise distinctive locations, levels or dimensions?  Uncertain

      Describe:  I knew I was going somewhere but couldn't make out where.

Did you have any sense of altered space or time?  Uncertain

      Describe:  Time didn't feel like a factor.  I felt as if I had nothing to worry about anymore.

Did you have a sense of knowing special knowledge, universal order and/or purpose?  No

Did you reach a boundary or limiting physical structure?  Uncertain

      Describe:  I just felt peacefulness and didn't know what to expect.

Did you become aware of future events?  No

Were you involved in or aware of a decision to return to the body?  Uncertain

      Describe:  I just know I willing to except where I was going.

Did you have any psychic, paranormal or other special gifts following the experience you did not have prior to the experience?  No

Did you have any changes of attitudes or beliefs following the experience?  Yes

      Describe:  I attend church now more often than I did before and truly believe in angels.

Has the experience affected your relationships?  Daily life?  Religious practices etc.?  Career choices?  Made me realize life is to short and this changed my attitude in many ways.  I like to live my life as if it were the last.  I know longer have the fear of dying someday.  I actually just had a bizarre dream where I was in a plane about to crash and in my dream I had no fear and was ready to except what would happen because I had already been there once before.

Have you shared this experience with others?  Yes

      Describe:  I feel as if I should be speaking of my accident and hope that it will help others understand what they may be going through.  It helped me in a way to talk about it.

What emotions did you experience following your experience?  I went through many emotions regarding the accident and rehab.  Why me?  Why did I survive?  What's my purpose?

What was the best and worst part of your experience?  Knowing that prayers from family, friends and other people I didn't know may have helped me achieve where I am today.

Is there anything else you would like to add concerning the experience?  I can't express enough to people that where we may go after death is not a bad place per my experience.

Has your life changed specifically as a result of your experience?  Yes

      Describe:  Im much more open minded to events around me and take little for granted.

Following the experience, have you had any other events in your life, medications or substances which reproduced any part of the experience?  No

Did the questions asked and information you provided accurately and comprehensively describe your experience?  Yes

Please offer any suggestions you have to improve the www.nderf.org questionnaire?  All questions asked helped me describe to you things I wouldn't have thought of.