I suddenly found myself in
complete darkness and there was nothing to grab hold of until I remembered
that I had a body...and when I felt love, a light came on within my heart
and little by little it grew larger until it illuminated my body completely
floodlight with its own light.
I sensed that I was in some kind of
cave or dark tunnel, and towards the back a small light appeared that grew
larger to the degree that my own light grew, and it got nearer, as if it
were a reflection of where I should go.
In the darkness there were many
shadows of people around me walking without feeling or purpose (like
Zombies). I saw on my right a being who didn't show me his face and I
thought it was my dead grandfather because of the suit he wore of English
cashmere, his cane, and hat that he wore when he was alive. He indicated to
me that I shouldn't try to speak with those people because they would pay me
no mind. They were in their own unconscious dream walking like robots.
This made me sad and feel compassionate towards them.
I decided to continue on my way
towards the light at the back of the tunnel and came out upon a very
beautiful little beach where there were many ranges of colors I have not
seen on earth. They were very clear and sharp but didn't hurt my eyes. Very
white sand, the blue of the sky and water were very lovely. The color of
the rocks etc. weren't reflections of anything. They shone of their own
light.
The figure on my right, who was guiding
me, stopped and I could not see his face and as though we were at a small,
enclosed beach, there was a hill that served as a place for projecting my
life from beginning to end several times. At first rapidly and afterwards
more slowly. It was amazing how my life was shown with events I had
completely forgotten about and others that were so insignificant that it
felt like I was seeing each frame of the personal movie of my life on
earth. I realized that I understood
everything with a great clarity and super-lucidity I had never experienced
before. I discovered that I had personally chosen to take on a physical
body and have the life experiences I was having. I realized I had wasted time in
suffering and what I should have been doing was using my freedom to choose
true love, and not pain, in all that came into my life.
I saw that I, myself, had designed the
life I would lead before voluntarily coming into this world and that my
freedom within a physical body was to be found only by consciously
cultivating happiness in all my thoughts, feelings and actions because I had
designed or chosen my own destiny before taking on a physical body. I realized that there was no judging
or punishing God like religions say there is and it was my mind with an
expanded consciousness that judged itself and sifted its actions through the
filter of perfect, conscious love.
I returned to the front of the beach
and saw on the bottom something like an island in the form of a mountain.
At its peak, in the sky, there was a very white sun that spoke to me
telepathically and made me understand everything about life.
Suddenly, coming out of this light, I
saw a myriad of beings dressed in white who followed someone who carried
himself with great magnificence, who had a white beard and wore a kind of
tunic-like vestment that was whiter than that of the others and was very
beautiful. He came down on my left to where I was standing, without
touching the earth (floating above the peaceful sea). On his breast he wore
a gold Cross of Malta, surrounded by a circle that was also golden and he
looked at me with serenity.
At the end of the procession of beings
was my late father, who also wore a white tunic, and I asked him
telepathically: "What are you doing here since you have already died." He
told me in like manner (telepathically) that he was in the world of the
living and that I came from the world of the dead on earth. This greatly surprised me and I
remembered that I had come from earth and had left my 3 small children
alone. I looked at the bearded man and asked him to allow me to return to
be with them because they needed me. He agreed and told me I could go back.
All of a sudden, I went to a place lower
than the images on my left and saw a series of rocks in the sand jutting out
into the sea and I saw myself sitting on the largest rock that was between
the beach and the sea. I wore a white tunic that was
semitransparent (like organza) decorated with tinkling gold stars. I was
surprised to see myself pregnant since my marriage was not a happy one and
the last thing I wanted was to be pregnant again.
But suddenly there emerged from the
sea ( I only saw the upper half of his body) a beautiful being, quite young,
of white complexion, with very large turquoise blue eyes and golden, curly
hair. He smiled at me and told me
telepathically that he was my true husband and sent me his love. I felt
infinite tenderness. I understood that the kind of love closest to divine
love in this life is that which we feel for a small child.
As this wonderful feeling came over
me, I heard within my heart a voice that said: "Through love you will
understand everything. The essence, the essence, the essence..." This was
followed by a feeling of great peace mixed with joy within my soul. I sensed
that my life would change for the better, and this has been the case ever
since because I have a greater understanding of my life's true meaning.
I then turned to see the light in the
sky and a telepathic force poured a series of codes filled with millennial
wisdom into my mind about: Creation, the world, my life and that of all
other beings that inhabit all universes, that everything is eternal,
spiritual life, everything belongs to it and that the distinctions or
differences that we make in this life are done out of ignorance or because
we have forgotten this truth.
As if by a giant magnet the
light drew me to it and I was submerged in its interior where all there was
was light. I forgot I had a body and felt fused with the light.
In that moment I experienced a feeling of "plural unity" and understood
everything with extreme clarity all of a sudden. I discovered what reality
is and saw and understood with my consciousness alert that allowed me to
comprehend everything with infinite perfection, without any doubt.
From my heart sprang an "Ah Ha"!!!!
feeling, as if there were something I had always known but had forgotten and
that I can't explain with words or human language. I felt like a
co-participant of creation.
A PART OF WHAT I UNDERSTOOD AND
REMEMBER TODAY IS:
***We live in a "Plural Unity" or
"Oneness." In other words, our reality is "Unity in Plurality and Plurality
in Unity." -
***That I was everything and
everything was me, without essential differences other than in temporal
appearances.
***That there is no external god, but
that god is in everything and everything in god just as life itself.
***That there is no god outside
ourselves but is, rather, in everything and everything is a part of god, as
is life itself.
***That god is everything and nothing
at the same time.
***That everyone and everything or
temporal phenomenon within this dimension is where it should be because it
emanates from the blueprint of a shared dream (if we can call it that) that
is repeated indefinitely until we understand what is essential or real.
***That everything is part of an
essential game of life itself, and that to the degree that we live by true
love--unconditional and universal--the closer we are to an understanding of
what life truly is, which is true happiness and perfect wisdom.
***That everything is experience and
that this life and the next are essentially the same because everything is
god. Nothing is outside of god just as nothing is outside of life itself.
***Death is a metamorphosis of time.
One more illusion from our mental concepts. Essentially, time does not
exist, nor does space. They are illusions of our creative mind that plays a
game of self-deception in the creation of events.
***That "I," includes "We," and are
like a mirror where we perceive the reflection of our reality in its many
facets and illusions.
***That the "creator" is eternally
creating and one of the creations is the practice of conscious love. "One
learns to paint by painting." That's why this "temporal human illusory
creation" exists as though it were a matrix within another matrix and this,
within another...multi-dimensionally until we wake up.
***I experienced something that can't
be transmitted with words but that can be expressed as "The Essence of Life
is its Total Nothingness. (Please understand "Nothingness" as something
that has no intrinsic substance, but is rather constructed by a multitude of
phenomena, which in turn are formed by other untold multitude of phenomena
to the point of infinity). I understood that intangible, indescribable life
is all that exists. There is no death (it's only a description to show the
polarities in the world of phenomena)
***Consciously living by love is the
essence of life itself and is made manifest or materializes in this plane of
existence as a cohesive force to recreate itself in multiple forms as a game
in which nothingness recreates itself in temporary, illusory events.
***The known universe is a fraction of
infinite reality that by love has become finite pieces in our temporal
"hands."
***I learned thousands of other things
without end and it is difficult to express in words because words are
insufficient, they can't describe what I experienced in this other state of
consciousness that was much clearer than this one.
When I returned to this life, I felt I
had fallen into a very heavy space and that my body was as lead and my mind
was the same and very slow...
I saw my loved ones, family and
friends as if they were nothing to me; they were only reflections in the
great theater of life and each one voluntarily agreed to play a part in
order to learn more and better how to love.
I spoke with them to tell them of my
experience and they looked at me as though I were crazy. I realized they
didn't understand what I was saying to them.
Little by little my experience grew
faint, but there appeared many new special experiences of telepathy,
intuition developed between others such as: voluntary out of body
experiences and involuntary bi-location. I especially cannot control the
latter and I would like to know using conventional language how this
phenomenon happens.
I only know that everything is
eternal, pure consciousness and that we are in a mental dream that is
permanently being constructed as a dynamic of consciousness that knows
itself and recreates itself through each one of us.
That we are the "point of emptiness" where the void or nothingness of the
universe becomes aware of itself. It is really hard to explain this. But I
know that everything I saw originates from thoughts, or the universal mind,
that is projected in images and events that interact with lucid
consciousness as an experience, and that this whole experience is a part the
infinitude of that which is real on every plain or level of existence that
we want to invent or divide into pieces so that our temporal mind can
decipher it despite its limitations. I believe I understood that what we
call god is the silence of indescribable life that is in everything, and
everything is in it.
As an analogy we could use the image
of steam that is converted into water and water into ice and once it is in
that state, ice forgets that it is steam with its capacity for expansion.
This is what happens to us in this plane of consciousness.
I believe I understood that what we
call god is the silence of indescribable life that is in everything and in
which everything exists or is within it. A marvelous, loving and conscious
eternity.
Note: I feel that all the images that were created in my mind during this
experience, before entering into the light, are symbolic thought forms of
something perhaps more profound that could serve in support of a translation
of that which is essential experience. It is impossible to explain with our
limited human language, yet I am now trying to decipher it little by little.
I noticed a change in the speed my
mind worked and developed my intuition or universal perception of life. It
is difficult to translate with my physical brain, that which is essential or
infinite with conventional language.
Perhaps through the art of telepathic
communication soul to soul, it can be done. I will continue trying to do
this and will try see if someone who has experienced this same phenomenon or
who has had a similar experience, has another part of the verbal puzzle and
among all of us we can put together a clearer picture that can benefit those
who do not read.
I ask your indulgence for my
limitations and I hope that I haven't confused anyone. I will conclude by
saying:
"From but one piece of clay, many
forms can be made."
"All mental designs crystallize in
fleeting forms of nothingness."
Was the kind of experience
difficult to express in words?
Yes The infinite tenderness, the perception and
understanding of life and of everything, the nothingness and perfect
knowledge and wisdom. My words cannot express the experience nor what I
understood.
At the time of this experience,
was there an associated life threatening event?
Whenever I have lost
consciousness for one reason or another, there has never been any warning
that it was going to happen...other than maybe feeling faint or feeling bad
or something...and then BANG! it just happens...like that. In fact, if it
weren't for the fact that I have come back to 3D consciousness, I would
never know anything happened. I don't know what your experience has been
with this, but this is what I have experienced.
DR JEFF COMMENT:
Having
a medical condition where this happens, then having a NDE associated
with “come back to 3D consciousness” is sufficient to confirm NDE.
At what time during the
experience were you at your highest level of consciousness and alertness?
When I entered into the light. I entered into the "void" and into
"everything" at the same time. I became fused with the light and reality
became aware of itself. I realized everything was god and is permanently
creating. Nothingness creating nothingness. Truthfully, I do not know how
to express or transmit this with words. They limit me...
How did your highest level of
consciousness and alertness during the experience compare to your normal
every day consciousness and alertness?
More consciousness
and alertness than normal
If your highest level of
consciousness and alertness during the experience was different from your
normal every day consciousness and alertness, please explain:
When I entered into the light. I entered into the "void" and into
"everything" at the same time. I became fused with the light and reality
became aware of itself. I realized everything was god and is permanently
creating. Nothingness creating nothingness. Truthfully, I do not know how
to express or transmit this with words. They limit me...
Did your vision differ in any
way from your normal, everyday vision (in any aspect, such as clarity, field
of vision, colors, brightness, depth perception degree of
solidness/transparency of objects, etc.)?
Yes The clarity
and colors are indescribable.
Did your hearing differ in any way
from your normal, everyday hearing (in any aspect, such as clarity, ability
to recognize source of sound, pitch, loudness, etc.)? Yes Clarity of understanding without
sound, by telepathy, also inexplicable.
Did you experience a separation
of your consciousness from your body?
Yes
What emotions did you feel
during the experience? Super-lucid consciousness,
infinite tenderness and complete peace.
Did you pass into or through a
tunnel or enclosure? Yes As described above.
Did you see a light?
Yes As described above.
Did you meet or see any other
beings? Yes
Did you experience a review of
past events in your life?
Yes Everything is recorded in a
universal memory, even the most insignificant things. I took form in my
body voluntarily and designed the life I would experience in order to learn
how to truly love more and better. Everything we do should be done from
true love, without ulterior motives and without judgment: unconditional and
universal. There is only one law: LIFE. Death does not exist. We are all
God. Our own super-lucid consciousness is what judges us with love. The
kind of human love that most resembles divine love is: infinite tenderness.
What we think or want to think is what is, come what may. In this way the
universe is constructed. It is like a game of consciousness that recognizes
itself and recreates itself through each one of us, and at the same time we
are the "point of nothingness" in which life becomes self-aware. -It is
difficult to express this-
Did you observe or hear anything
regarding people or events during your experience that could be verified
later? Yes In my own life.
Did you see or visit any
beautiful or otherwise distinctive locations, levels or dimensions?
Yes What I most liked was the "void" of nothingness because I understood
everything.
Did you have any sense of
altered space or time? Yes There was no space or time in
the void.
Did you have a sense of knowing
special knowledge, universal order and/or purpose?
Yes This is what I hope someone can help me with. In my mind
there remains a footprint of something that will be of help to many, but I
don't know how to explain it in words. Perhaps there is another way to
convey it?
Did you reach a boundary or
limiting physical structure? Yes I entered into the Void
and the Everything without time or space, like an eternity.
Did you become aware of future
events?
Yes Very clearly.
Did you have any psychic,
paranormal or other special gifts following the experience you did not have
prior to the experience?
Yes Many. Among them:
Super-lucid dreams, premonitions, intuitive perceptions of the thoughts of
other people, voluntary and involuntary out of body experiences and 5 times
I have experienced being in more than one place at a time, etc.
Have you shared this experience
with others? Yes I sought help from several people
so they could help orient me and some of them didn't believe me and thought
my experience to have been a fantasy, others thought me strange or I made
them afraid. For these reasons I avoid telling the experience. But people
who are kindred souls believe me but do not know how to explain what
happened.
Did you have any knowledge of
near death experience (NDE) prior to your experience?
No
How did you view the reality of
your experience shortly (days to weeks) after it happened:
Experience was definitely real I saw it as more real than
this life. I feel that we are asleep in this life. It is more dense, like
lead, heavy...
Were there one or several parts
of the experience especially meaningful or significant to you?
When I fused with the light. I think I have something in my mind that could
help humanity and I can't remember what it is.
How do you currently view the
reality of your experience: Experience was
definitely real Because everything was clearer. My mind was
super-lucid and everything was understandable. In this life I feel as
though I am in a dream and everything is very slow...
Have your relationships changed
specifically as a result of your experience? Yes
Now I see life in an entirely different way. Before I saw it as lineal but
now as a totality.
Have your religious
beliefs/practices changed specifically as a result of your experience?
Yes I don't practice any religion. I see them as being very
discriminatory. The only thing that unites all the religions is the love
that I feel there to be and to which they want to arrive and incorporate
into life. The true essence. The bad thing is that there is much confusion
and fanaticism.
Following the experience, have
you had any other events in your life, medications or substances which
reproduced any part of the experience? No
Is there anything else you would
like to add concerning the experience? I would like
someone to help me experience the "all knowingness" again, to remember with
clarity what I experienced and thus help humanity.
Did the questions asked and
information you provided so far accurately and comprehensively describe your
experience?
No My words are inadequate to explain
what I experienced.
Are there any other questions we
could ask to help you communicate your experience?
I would like to meet a serious researcher who would like to help me.
Thanks.
