Eugenia's NDE

That day, Wednesday the 14, they did a corrective rhinoplasty on my nose and by itself the surgery and recovery went without incident.  After my hospital stay, I arrived home and began feeling definitively bad because my legs and arms were asleep and my hands began going numb to such a degree that they were completely hard which was painful. The doctor asked my husband to take me back to the hospital.  When I arrived they diagnosed me with a toxic reaction to medication and immediately gave me an antihistamine, which made the reaction worse.  My blood pressure shot up.  I remember at that point I could hear things around me but couldn't see anything.  Everything was dark. I asked myself and then the doctor if I was going to die and he told me he didn't know.  In that state I heard the alarm of the monitor continually.  Nevertheless I tried to see and there was nothing around me.  There was a moment when I felt panic because I knew I was going to die.  But afterwards I felt peace or serenity...I'm not sure what to call it. 

At that moment, I'm not sure exactly when, someone or something began giving me an examination of conscience and in the blink of an eye images from my life began passing before me beginning with my childhood.  Each image had its counterpart, or as if the actions of my life were being put into a balance.  I could see my house, "alone and sad."  I don't remember exactly hearing a voice, but I did understand everything that was said (as if my mind translated it).  They made me see with clarity that my husband wasn't that being who I had judged so harshly and that my son would be just as well off in life without me.  At the end of this "judgment" there is the option of deciding whether one goes on towards death or stays on earth.  At the end of the review of your life, they give you the option of choosing between life or death. 

I didn't see any light, only darkness.  At first I felt fear...afterwards I felt peace.  Before the judgment I was conscious.  During the judgment I didn't hear anything and I'm not sure if I saw images or not.  Neither can I ascertain whether the person who accompanied me during the judgment was a man or a woman because it was a narrative without a voice.  In the judgment they showed me how small and fragile I am in this world and how insignificant one can be measured against this "something" that is everything.  Afterwards I wasn't afraid and thought:  "Lord work your will through me and if it is that I should die, take me with you."  I began to pray and returned to listening to the doctor who was once again asking me questions.  I now listened to him up close as if he were yelling.  Little by little I began feeling better. 

Was the kind of experience difficult to express in words? Yes    In my case it was something inexplicable because during "the judgment," as you people call it, I was guided by "some thing or somebody" who narrates, I don't know exactly whether with words or if I intuited what he was "saying" or trying to explain.  

At the time of this experience, was there an associated life threatening event?          Yes     the extreme condition of my blood pressure. 

At what time during the experience were you at your highest level of consciousness and alertness?    After the "judgment" when I understood I was on the threshold of death and was no longer afraid.  

How did your highest level of consciousness and alertness during the experience compare to your normal every day consciousness and alertness?    More consciousness and alertness than normal 

If your highest level of consciousness and alertness during the experience was different from your normal every day consciousness and alertness, please explain:          After the "judgment" when I understood I was on the threshold of death and was no longer afraid. 

Did your vision differ in any way from your normal, everyday vision (in any aspect, such as clarity, field of vision, colors, brightness, depth perception degree of solidness/transparency of objects, etc.)?  Yes    The darkness was total, but the visions I had aren't like a movie but rather I would describe them as if I relived them and it's there that my consciousness was magnified.  

Did your hearing differ in any way from your normal, everyday hearing (in any aspect, such as clarity, ability to recognize source of sound, pitch, loudness, etc.)?              Yes   I heard every word that was said either nearby or far away from me (I don't know how far away they were).  

Did you experience a separation of your consciousness from your body?     No 

What emotions did you feel during the experience?       First fear, because I believed I was having a battle with death.  I had the impression that death was tugging at me and I resisted going but afterwards I didn't feel anything and began feeling serenity, peace and calm.   

Did you pass into or through a tunnel or enclosure?          No       

Did you see a light?           No       

Did you meet or see any other beings?           No       

Did you experience a review of past events in your life?    Yes   I learned of some actions that had caused emotional damage to others, especially members of my family.  In one of the episodes I saw how I caused my grandmother to suffer physically, who, because of diabetes had a varicose ulcer on one of her legs. I also learned not to judge other people, because I know there is no such thing as human perfection and that the most important thing is love and understanding between all beings, be they animals, plants or humans.  All have life and suffer. 

Did you observe or hear anything regarding people or events during your experience that could be verified later?          Yes   I heard the doctor ask my husband to get some medication and I yelled for him to write it down on a piece of paper because he always forgets things.  According to my husband, they were in the waiting room when this happened.  

Did you see or visit any beautiful or otherwise distinctive locations, levels or dimensions?            Uncertain     I'm not sure because the darkness where I found myself was something really peculiar as if I was in a void.  

Did you have any sense of altered space or time?   Yes    When I was still conscious and was feeling really bad, I thought that time went by very slowly and that my agony was being prolonged.  My discomfort was enormous and consumed me from within.  When I got to the stage of the "judgment" I can say that time had no time.  Things that happen in that moment simply happen.  One looses the notion of time.  I'm not sure whether or not time even passed. 

Did you have a sense of knowing special knowledge, universal order and/or purpose?     Yes

That we are the architects of our own destiny.  That nobody is more to blame than ourselves for our actions during this life. At the end of our road and after the judgment we have a final decision to make:  Are you going to return or go?  That the someone or some thing that judges you is perhaps yourself.    That from now on you can create your life with full consciousness of your acts and the transcendence of them. 

Did you reach a boundary or limiting physical structure? No       

Did you become aware of future events?       Uncertain         Not yet, my experience is very recent.   

Did you have any psychic, paranormal or other special gifts following the experience you did not have prior to the experience?     No       

Have you shared this experience with others?         Yes   Almost immediately because I felt the necessity of relating the experience and the lessons to someone, although I did it with trepidation.  

Did you have any knowledge of near death experience (NDE) prior to your experience?    Yes      Ethics classes in college.  Some movies I had seen that I thought were a publicity stunt to get money by compounding people's morbidness.   

How did you view the reality of your experience shortly (days to weeks) after it happened:            Experience was definitely real  It is something that makes you reflect on what you are and how you make your way in this life. 

Were there one or several parts of the experience especially meaningful or significant to you?   Yes, when I had the option of going or returning. 

How do you currently view the reality of your experience:            Experience was definitely real   I see it with greater consciousness. 

Have your relationships changed specifically as a result of your experience?           Yes     Now I am more objective and less critical. 

Have your religious beliefs/practices changed specifically as a result of your experience?            No            

Following the experience, have you had any other events in your life, medications or substances which reproduced any part of the experience?         No       

Is there anything else you would like to add concerning the experience?     As the mortician explained to me, I took it as a life experience that is necessary to tell others about.  

Did the questions asked and information you provided so far accurately and comprehensively describe your experience?         Yes   Although some questions were a bit confusing.