Denise N's Possible NDE

EXPERIENCE DESCRIPTION:

            I was around 16 years old and my parents had made an appointment with a local dentist.  My parents had been referred to him from my boyfriend's parents at the time and they thought he was an excellant dentist.

  I remember being in the dentist chair in a small room - the room to this day is very memorable.  The room was small with a window off to the left and a door off to the right in the direction that my feet were facing.  Wall in front of me with pictures - nothing distinct to remember other than the basic dental room.  The door was open and I could hear regular dental office noises - people talking, music, phone ringing.

  I am laying back in the dental chair with the dentist leaning on my right arm.  He was a little on the heavy side and his belly tended to lean on your arm as he worked.  I had never been given nitrous oxide to have dental work done, but he did this for all of his patients prior to injecting them with novacaine in the mouth - to try and relax them before the needle was shown.

  I had been to the dentist many times before for regular visits and this was to have a filling put in, so he needed to numb my jaw.  I am not nervous when it comes to having work done on my teeth and to this day can almost fall asleep at the dentist.  I remember he talked to me about the gas and asked me if it was ok and I thought why not....my boyfriend had told me the dentist did this for him and he thought it was cool feeling (made your voice sound like Donald Duck...and you get a buzzy feeling that makes you feel good).  He brought out the mask and covered my face with it.  I breathed a few breaths of the gas and - this was the hardest part to explain - all of a sudden I was no longer laying in the dentist chair, but looking down on myself.

  It seemed like time was not a factor here.  In fact, it took me awhile to really focus on what I was seeing.  I remember looking down from the corner of the room....near the door...at the edge of the ceiling...I had this feeling that I was stationary at the edge of the ceiling....just there....did not think to see if I had a body or any of that.  The view of the room was like it was all soft and cloudy past the edges of the room...as if the room was solid...but not really.

  I could look down at this person in a dentist chair.  The heavyset dentist was leaning on her right arm and he had his hand on the mask holding it over her mouth.  I could not hear anything...it was almost like watching a black and white movie without sound.  The movie camera was at the ceiling near the corner of the room, door down on my left almost within touching distance.  I cannot remember how long it was...me looking down at this scene...but I wasn't concerned at all with anything going on...seemed like I was watching tv...kind of detached and unconcerned.

  I cannot explain how long I was at this vantage point, but it wasn't a long period of time.  When I try to put a timeframe to this...event...it would be like this.  Start timing your thought process as you read this and then slow it down....read very slow....kind of like in a dream...but not....I can remember the scene as it unfolded....and can recall just about every moment involved.  I had enough 'time' to feel like I was 'there' all of a sudden.  I remember looking at the scene below, checking out the room and the dentist...just scoping the place out...kind of like in a detatched wonder...like "How cool...what's this?"

  I started to try and figure out what was going on, where "I" was....then I felt a 'presence' near me.  This presence asked me to look at the scene and focus.  I didn't want to and started to turn and look at the 'being' next to me and was gently turned to the scene again and told to focus...kind of like a child was asked to focus.  I was urged to do something about the scene....told to take the mask off the girl's face.  Didn't feel like she was in trouble and didn't feel like I needed to do anything...kind of like a child thinking "Why...I don't even know this girl...why intervene...she looked like she was ok".  I was urged to focus and take the mask off - the urgency or the 'thoughts' from this other being were becoming hard to ignore and I started feeling the need to do as I was told.  I started focusing - "Look at the girl...take the mask off....look at her...take the mask off".  I had to be told to focus...as I did not want to...I did not recognize 'her'....and she was not in trouble...or did not seem to be.

  All of a sudden, the urgency became more than I could ignore and I started to focus...and then the thought occurred to me...wasn't I supposed to be at the dentist office?  What's going on...who are these people I'm watching...is the girl ok?  I was looking at the girl and felt shocked...like I thought...I'm supposed to be at the dentist...here I am looking at a girl in the dentist chair that looks...like my age...and I felt the need to help her...and then I felt this being next to me asking me to focus on 'me' actually doing something to help 'her'.  I felt like I couldn't really 'help' her....as it was a scene I was looking at and for some reason felt like I couldn't really touch anything.  The being kept insisting I focus and to look at the scene...and I did as told...but in a detatched way.  "Time' was rolling on...if you could call it that...if you timed the thoughts you are having as you are still reading this....keep the watch going?

  The being kept urging me to focus and I did...with increasing pressure to look and then do something.  I kept trying to mentally look around and wanted to look at other things...but was told to focus.  Then I remember wanting to ignore the being and look around more at this really cool place I was in...including looking at the being so close to me...was not afraid in the least of this 'being'.

  I tried to turn around to my right and was mentally turned back...weirdest feeling...I had control of where I wanted to look...but was like someone took my head and gently made me look back at the scene.  (I don't think I had a physical head while up near the ceiling...no way to verify...mirror?)

  I could not look back to my right...even though I tried several times.  Every time my 'eyes' were gently forced to focus on the scene, the girl and most importantly the mask...and then finally the being insisted in a very strong way...to take the mask off the girl's face.

  I finally put my mind to the task at hand...and focused...and then the next thing I know "I" was in the dentist chair..inside of the girl...trying to get her to remove the mask from her face.  To this day..not sure how to explain this....I don't remember touching the girl, but I went to help her....almost begrudgingly.  I even felt like I did the regular 16-year old girl thing by being huffy...not pleased to have to be told to 'do' something.  (I felt like a teenager..thought like one....at the stage where I did not like being told what to do and felt like I could make all the 'adult' decisions in my life and was beginning to push back at parental authority at this time...testing my boundries and all that.)

  Anyhow, I am inside 'the girl' and trying to get her right arm to remove the mask.  I could not feel her...like I was invisible...but could move her arm if I really, really, really tried...and I'm not sure why I thought I could do this...but I kept trying.  (Maybe I thought I could because I was told to do this...and then I wanted to do it...it was something the girl needed - help - and the being had insisted I do this...so I thought I could?)

  It was weird...one moment I was trying to help the girl and the next moment...I was the girl?  It took me a bit to come back into myself...as if I had to remember who I was...in this...sluggish...slow....body.  I felt like I was myself - a human being at this point - and I had a funny feeling like I was no longer up in the corner of the room...everything back to normal...but I knew something weird had just happened that I could not explain.  I cannot remember any 'popping' or sliding back into my body - just the thought that I have to help this girl..started to move down to her...my perspective immediately turned into I was 'in' her.

  I could not 'feel' her physical body...but I could....like I could take both of my hands (?) and pull her one arm (?) without actually touching her.  Hard to explain.  Kind of like I was energy and my hands had the power to move her energy?

  I remember distinctly having to pull her (?) right arm off from underneath his belly and make a determined effort to pull the mask off her face.  (This was the really strange part...I was kind of like laying inside of the girl trying to get her to move her arm and my arm kept floating out of hers.)

  When I removed the mask from my face, I was back in the dentist chair and it was my physical human hand removing the mask...not the 'other me"?

  The dentist was trying to put the mask back over my mouth, like he had just started...and he had barely had the mask touching my face...like he was used to giving a patient more gas to relax them - not to knock them out - but to relax them before the needle was used.

  It was a bit of a struggle...like I was drugged and did not have the energy in the beginning to do this...but kept trying and remember moving my right arm and taking the mask off...and then having a distinct trail of thoughts..as if in slow motion.  I thought, "Whew....never again...this is not a good thing...no more gas!"  The dentist did not seem concerned - as if nothing strange had happened to my body while I was not in it.  (?)  I don't think anything happened to my body...heart stopped or any physical death...not sure how to explain how I was outside of my body mentally and it kept on working? 

  To this day I wonder how this happened...and how could I not be in my body and it keep functioning?  I thought that if my 'spirit' was not in my body, that it would no longer work?  I even remember being up near the ceiling looking down on her...I don't think she was struggling...just a girl in a chair...at the dentist...the dentist was not behaivng as if she was in distress...and she was not in any distress...that I could tell.

  Not sure how I became in control of the mask...it was in my hand...but I distinctly remember having to struggle to pull my arm off from under the dentist's belly.  I remember the mask was in the dentist's hand...distinctly remember this.  I cannot remember how my hand was the 'primary' hand under the dentist's hand - all of a sudden - but it was...and he was kind of pressing my hand down with the mask back onto my face....and then I moved my hand away with the mask and his hand.  I don't remember how I took the mask out of his hand...or how my hand became under his....I don't remember him taking his hand off the mask, me putting my hand on it and him putting his hand back over mine...but this must have happened.

  He tried to move my hand and the mask back over my mouth - but I remember looking at him as I pulled the mask off and away from my face - his hand still over mine - and saying, "I do not need this".  I remember the look I gave him...and felt like he physically pulled away from me like...I was more powerful than him?  The feeling in the room shifted...from a normal dental visit...soft music, phones, people talking....to silence as I focused on the dentist eye-to-eye and felt like I had authority over this person - and in an adult way - told him in no uncertain terms (with a look?) that the mask will not go back on my face.  (I felt a little weird...like I was given strength to tell him what to do - I had never met the dentist before - but I was a teenager and was always respectful of professionals and adults...even during this teenage stage...)

  The dentist didn't seem to act weird or funny...like anything strange was happening...and the dental visit carried on as normal.  I kind of pushed it to the back of my head...and ignored it....as quick as I could...it was too strange...and I definitely did not want to tell anyone....thought they would think I was being 'unusual'...and I knew it was not normal to talk about this type of stuff.  (I had not heard of NDE's at this time...nor could I explain it...so why try?)

  I want to try and explain the 'being'.  I don't know if I could have ignored the being....and to this day wonder about this individual and wished he would have let me look at him, talk to him...I was extremely curious to know him.  When I became aware of his presence...I was not shocked.  I felt like he was kind and I wasn't afraid to have him at my shoulder - like I expected him to be there.(?)

  He is big...bigger than me...easily.  For some reason I could feel him...his size.  My eyesight was not limited...but it was.  Kind of like standing in a dark room and having someone stand next to you...just close enough that you are not touching, but very close.  I don't know how to explain this part....I could 'feel' his presence...and I could mentally 'feel' he had features...but I could not see with my eyes...but could feel him with my brain...which was weird...because if I was not in my body...and my brain was in my body...how could I think...out of my body...much less use my 'brain' to map out features of someone I could not visibly see. (?)

  I had a distinct feeling I was me...not a dream...definitely not a dream.  I wanted to look farther past the walls...for whatever reason I thought I could...and it would just fade to a creamy white past them...like there was something past the walls...but I was not allowed to see through the creamy white stuff.

  I accepted the situation kind of like at face value - like it was normal to be out of my body talking to this being - did not really question the individual being near me....like that is where he is supposed to be all of the time.  To this day have always felt this 'being' near me...he comes and goes....the feeling that he is there....just accept it.  He is a guardian of sorts....he is there during times of stress or in times of need....helping me to make the right decisions and helping me to be kind, loving, good....kind of like an invisible father?  I have felt him very strong next to me when I am making stressful decisions....and even have felt his hand on my right shoulder twice...very large hand....to stop me from saying hurtful things.  Don't know how this can happen...cannot explain how an invisible hand can touch me...cannot explain this....being.

  I wasn't afraid of the being and he was talking to me through mental thoughts...I could not "hear" him with ears.  It was a mental thing - "focus on the girl".  I wasn't really interested in focusing....because it was like watching tv and after awhile....I kept wanting to turn around to my right to see what was telling me to look at the girl.  I wanted to look at....it...it felt like a male...not sure why.  I never finished turning though, as it wanted me to focus on the mask on her face and taking it off.  This was not interesting to me and it had to keep insisting I focus on the girl.

  I want to try and mention that time was not something that factored into this situation.  One moment I was in the dentist chair, the next moment I was looking down on this scene.  No sounds of leaving my body or feeling of transferring from one place to another.  The amount of 'time' in this other place watching the scene below was hard to define.  If I try to think of explaining the time element, it would be a matter of trying to explain how long it takes to think of something...and then the next thought...and so on...trying to explain how many thoughts equal so much time...hard to put a beginning or end to the timeframe.

  When I first felt my self near the ceiling, it was not scary or even strange...just kind of normal....like I should have expected something like this...or that I had no need to fear the situation....just kind of it's ok...fear of the unknown was not a factor.  I did feel funny...like what am I doing here...started looking around...I could see, but I don't remember looking at myself.

  It was like time did not exist, I was not afraid to be where I found myself at that time, and I had just started getting this feeling of...how cool...what is happening...trying to watch what was before me....and then I felt this presence off to my right, very close.  It wanted me to fucus on the girl and I didn't want to...as I had already looked at her and the dentist and the stuff below me...I wanted to look around me by then.

  The edges of the walls we there...but it was like a hologram...solid walls...but not...I couldn't see anything beyond the walls from my vantage point, but whenever I tried, it was all soft creamy white...cloudy...like I didn't have a need to know what was past that boundry of the walls, ceiling and floor.  I felt like what was behind me structurally was not exactly a ceiling, but I felt like my viewpoint was from this location.

Was the kind of experience difficult to express in words? Yes     I didn't feel uncomfortable or afraid of what was happening - kind of detached - no worries kind of atmosphere.

At the time of this experience, was there an associated life threatening event?          No       Was getting my teeth worked on and did not expect any problems as I have been do the dentist all my life.

At what time during the experience were you at your highest level of consciousness and alertness?    While I was near the ceiling, looking down on the girl in the dentist chair.

How did your highest level of consciousness and alertness during the experience compare to your normal every day consciousness and alertness?    Normal consciousness and alertness

            While I was near the ceiling, looking down on the girl in the dentist chair.

Did your vision differ in any way from your normal, everyday vision (in any aspect, such as clarity, field of vision, colors, brightness, depth perception degree of solidness/transparency of objects, etc.)?  Uncertain      I felt like I could see...without all the usual human stuff I would need...I could see...but could not see if I had a body, per se.

Did your hearing differ in any way from your normal, everyday hearing (in any aspect, such as clarity, ability to recognize source of sound, pitch, loudness, etc.)?
            Yes     No sound...no dental office sounds...complete silence.  Even when the 'being' was talking to me...it was sounds that I could hear...but not through sounds waves...mental only...like no one else could hear him but me...the girl and the dentist could not hear him....or me.

Did you experience a separation of your consciousness from your body?     Yes

What emotions did you feel during the experience?            Unconcerned....wonder....curioisty.

Did you pass into or through a tunnel or enclosure?          No      

Did you see a light?           No      

Did you meet or see any other beings?           Yes     He was just behind me on my left...a little above...but close...near my ear it seemed.  I felt like I knew him - always have (?) and that he was to be trusted.  He communicated telepathically...I cannot explain it otherwise.  The dentist and girl in the chair could not see us...or hear us.

Did you experience a review of past events in your life?    No      

Did you observe or hear anything regarding people or events during your experience that could be verified later?          No      

Did you see or visit any beautiful or otherwise distinctive locations, levels or dimensions?           No           

Did you have any sense of altered space or time?   Yes     The dentist office seemed to be a scene out of a black and white movie....the edges of the room looked real and certain...but beyond them was foggy light..creamy..wispy...could not look beyond.  No sense of time here.

Did you have a sense of knowing special knowledge, universal order and/or purpose?     No      

Did you reach a boundary or limiting physical structure? Yes     The dental room had a boundry...felt like I was floating at the top right hand corner of the room...if I was still sitting in the chair and looked up to the corner of the room near the door....I could see the corner.  I did not feel like I had a boundry that I could not cross...or that something would happen to me terrible...if I could leave the boundries...totally unconcerned about whether I was safe or not...was not a factor.

Did you become aware of future events?       Uncertain
            I have always had feelings of being different than my family...like I was just biding my time on earth (?) and it was a thing I got to do.  I kind of lived my life before and after this with the same unconcern for danger...did not put myself into bad situations...but if I found myself in one...I was not afraid.  For years I could walk into dark rooms, dangerous places, situations...not concerned that I would be hurt.  No special 'powers'...just feel like I am being taken care of here...watched over.

Did you have any psychic, paranormal or other special gifts following the experience you did not have prior to the experience?     Uncertain      I have 'ideas' that pop into my head that I have to tell someone something...I don't feel this is any different than anyone else though.  I have thoughts of future events...and then feeling of DeJa Vu when it happens...not sure why I KNOW that something I am doing has happened before...but like I dreamed it and now I'm doing it?

Have you shared this experience with others?         Yes     I experienced this (and a few other incidents as a 3 year old) that I cannot explain.  I came across this NDE site by accident....synchronicity...at a time in my life I was seeking answers.  My 75 year old father passed away and I was feeling incredible saddness...missed him incredibly....had the desire to reach out to him somehow.  Started praying in the evening in my back yard when I took the dogs out for their last potty break.  I was asking for help...for things...for a sign to show me that he was still around.  I would ask for things...like I wish my Mom would call me (we were not close) and she would call the next morning.  This has happened many times.  (She says she ahs a strong urge to call me....)  I shared this with one of my sisters and she immediately thought it was a devil...and told me to stop listening to this being.  I told another sister years down the road and she had a more open-minded reaction.  I've then told my husband (of 23 years) and my teenage children.  My son and daughter have done things in their life that surprises me...they have always acted older than they are..very mature sometimes for thei age...and say things way beyond their comprehension....hard to explain.

Did you have any knowledge of near death experience (NDE) prior to your experience?    No      

How did you view the reality of your experience shortly (days to weeks) after it happened:            Experience was definitely real   

Were there one or several parts of the experience especially meaningful or significant to you?    I know feel like my guardian is with me at times of need.

How do you currently view the reality of your experience:            Experience was definitely real   

Have your relationships changed specifically as a result of your experience?           Uncertain      I am concerned that my family think I am a little looney...but they love me so much and don't feel that I am.

Have your religious beliefs/practices changed specifically as a result of your experience?            Yes     I was brought up to believe in God, Jesus, the Bible...went to church regularly as a child until this time.