Benny M's NDE

I do not know how to write this but I will try. On Tuesday  July 17th of 2006, I had an experience in the ER of the Hospital, surrounded by several ER staff and a few Doctors that I recognized from over the years, my heart stopped beating and I went unconscious . This is very hard to write. It is hard for me to explain but I entered another plane of existence at the exact moment  I passed out and realized I was floating in a multidimensional space. This was not a dream, dreams for me have never had well defined time and space relation or even make cognitive sense. I was one hundred percent aware of my mind in the situation. I was not quite sure or even asking at this point, where was I or why am I here. I  was there, where ever there is.  

 Time and distance and space as we know it acted different. Movement was not limited as it is here in every day life experience. For 45 seconds I traveled what seemed like thousands of miles from my entry point and had an experience like no conscious moment on earth or remembrance of any state of mind or any dreams I have ever experienced. This was totally new and real.   This was a transition into another realm. As my heart stopped, I passed out on the table. I immediately regained awareness on and in this new plain of existence.   

 The visual area was a combination of massive space and definitive location. To explain: I saw a tunnel from the outside as I was floating in space from several thousand feet above it. The space all around me was the color of a warm soft sky blue. There where wisps of soft white light moving within my visual range and far off in the distance. The tunnel appeared as translucent blue and white and it seemed as though I could look through it. 

 The tunnel opening was below me yet the tunnel its self flowed up and way above my visual plane and merged into a beautiful blue and white light where everything came together. It was the most incredible view I have ever seem in my life. I could feel this area around me and it seemed comforting and safe. As I looked at the tunnel entrance, I  moved at the speed of thought immediately to the opening of this tunnel. I think more, I was drawn to it by nature or fate as if I knew what to do. 

 Just to note, with no loss for the incredible beauty of the experience, the colors, peace of mind , painless and comforting feeling experienced in this event I will not try to describe, they where incredible. I know I will struggle to include every detail which is impossible to do. 

 The tunnel was large with soft rounded edges flowing into it. It was soft blue in color, not claustrophobic but warm and comforting, inviting. As I entered the space around the entrance I floated in and started to move forward.  I began to see events appearing  along the surface of the tunnel, like a million large screen TV’s,  or panels lining the walls but that is poor description as to what I really experienced. The events seemed to surround me from all sides. I felt at first without realization, some connection to these events. 

 Within a few seconds I realized it was my life and memories and events that only I would understand and put meaning to. The color and clarity where exactly as I had remembered them. These memories and events where passing though my mind  with incredible visual perspective, each was alive and in absolute detail and I could touch and feel them all at the same time. During all this I was moving further through the tunnel and up towards a merging of the surrounding blue and white light. This was or had been my existence, as if all of my being and soul were there and connected at one great moment.    

I was distracted for just a moment. I observed an event with my son in it and  it caught my attention.  I was able to slow my movement through the tunnel long enough stop and see him, it was his birthday I think. It may have been his 7th birthday. All there in absolute detail. I floated out of the event with my son and back into the Tunnel. My passage seemed to move more rapidly after this and I stopped trying to hold on to every memory as it went by. 

I still to this point had not thought about what was going on. What was happening to me was so wonderful it consumed me. I had not thought of the purpose or reason I was experiencing this. It was at that moment in time I had a brief pause in my thoughts away from the passing events and then I realized very clearly,  I had died. No event in my life has ever been so clear to me. This experience was exact, with meaning and purpose.

This was natural order. My body had or was well in the process of dieing.  I do not want to sound harsh by saying this. No events in my awakening state of mind have ever reached this level of conscious awareness.    

I briefly remembered the ER and that something had gone wrong but it did not matter.  

It was the most profound moment of my life. Very emotional for me to admit. I was not of my body any longer, I was of my soul. I was not frightened,  I was resolved with my life and very content.  

 As I was thinking all of this I was moving fast and gaining speed moving up through the tunnel towards a brighter blue/white light. The light was so beautiful it is impossible to describe in human terms. I had the feeling I was a very long way a away from the reality I had previously been existing in and going with purpose on this journey.  I wanted to keep going. That scares me a little. But I heard someone calling my name and I responded to that voice, my movement slowed down and as I turned my thoughts towards the voice my direction reversed and I moved again with incredible speed back along the tunnel to its entrance. This was not my decision. I woke up in the ER into a three dimensional space -- kind of disappointing.  I had not had a heart beat for 45 seconds and I felt as though I had come back from a very  long  distance to awake in my body.

Was the kind of experience difficult to express in words?          Yes    The multiple Dimensions, the speed at which my thoughts took place and the speed at which I could move.

At the time of this experience, was there an associated life threatening event?          Yes    My heart had failed in the emergency room.

At what time during the experience were you at your highest level of consciousness and alertness?  From Start to finish. But when I realized I had died, it was the most conscious moment of my existence.

How did your highest level of consciousness and alertness during the experience compare to your normal every day consciousness and alertness?          More consciousness and alertness than normal

If your highest level of consciousness and alertness during the experience was different from your normal every day consciousness and alertness, please explain:        As I have said, I experienced "existing" in a multi-dimensional plane. Even though this new experience had these new elements, they felt normal. The experience seemed 100 times more clear in thought than everyday life.

Did your vision differ in any way from your normal, everyday vision (in any aspect, such as clarity, field of vision, colors, brightness, depth perception degree of solidness/transparency of objects, etc.)?          Yes    Seemed to function as normal but I was not in my body. I never felt my head turn to look, yet I could see a lot more at one time. This is hard to explain - sorry.

Did your hearing differ in any way from your normal, everyday hearing (in any aspect, such as clarity, ability to recognize source of sound, pitch, loudness, etc.)?
          Uncertain     I never remember hearing any sounds. Odd, but I did not miss my hearing.

Did you experience a separation of your consciousness from your body?          Yes

What emotions did you feel during the experience?          I felt very safe. I felt love all around me. I felt resolve when I thought I had died and was not coming back. I felt guilty because I wanted to keep going.

DO NOT read that last statement the wrong way. I love my life and want to stay around till I fall apart. But something made me feel that it was ok and not to worry that all was fine. I feel as if I gave in to that feeling.

Did you pass into or through a tunnel or enclosure?        Yes    See the description above in number 3.

Did you see a light?         Yes    Yes, all around  but brighter above my relative plane.

Did you meet or see any other beings?         Yes    Along the tunnel as I described in No.3, I saw my son, but it was more of a memory, a multidimensional memory. He is still alive and fine. No spoken communications.

Did you experience a review of past events in your life?   Yes    I must have seen thousands of events passing at the speed of light yet each one I recognized and thought about. Did it change me? I always believed in life after death, it is nice to right every once in a while.

Did you observe or hear anything regarding people or events during your experience that could be verified later?         Uncertain    

Did you see or visit any beautiful or otherwise distinctive locations, levels or dimensions?          Yes    The tunnel was for me the big event. To see all my memories as I passed through it. Once in the tunnel the added dimensional aspect seemed normal. My thoughts moving at light speed seemed normal. My visions, memories and feelings took hold and held me in a state of wonder.

Did you have any sense of altered space or time?  Yes    Everything moved at great speed. As I said before, the space around me mixed with my thoughts and feelings to create a multidimensional environment. I felt as if I was part of the dimension.

Did you have a sense of knowing special knowledge, universal order and/or purpose?     Uncertain    

Did you reach a boundary or limiting physical structure? No     

Did you become aware of future events?      No         

Did you have any psychic, paranormal or other special gifts following the experience you did not have prior to the experience?       No     

Have you shared this experience with others?        Yes    I told my wife within hours. Most of my friends consider me to be a smart person. I told a lot of them, they believe me and many asked interesting questions about the experience and wanted to learn from it. Most have gained comfort from my experience.

Did you have any knowledge of near death experience (NDE) prior to your experience? No     

How did you view the reality of your experience shortly (days to weeks) after it happened:   Experience was definitely real   The intensity of the event has worn down but not the memory. If you want to know if I still think it was real, the answer is yes. The hard part is what to do with this information. Do you tell everyone about life after death and say don't worry it will be ok. I think that was Jesus' job. The guilt comes in not saying something. Think of the those that are dieing, what if you could pass the message on. I working on it. No answers yet.

Were there one or several parts of the experience especially meaningful or significant to you? The realization of my death. It is hard to explain. At one single moment in this experience, I fully understood my death was happening and I accepted it.

How do you currently view the reality of your experience:          Experience was definitely real         see 40 above it's included.

Have your relationships changed specifically as a result of your experience?          No     

Have your religious beliefs/practices changed specifically as a result of your experience? Yes    I feel closer to God a church.

Following the experience, have you had any other events in your life, medications or substances which reproduced any part of the experience?    No         

Is there anything else you would like to add concerning the experience?       No

Did the questions asked and information you provided so far accurately and comprehensively describe your experience? Yes    You asked good questions. So many of the feelings and experiences of an event like mine cannot be formed into question or even written by the person having the event. They are lost to another time and place. I am sorry I can not give them to you.